REVIEW: JAY & SILENT BOB REBOOT

 

REBOOT

Starring

Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Kevin Smith (4.3.2.1.)
Harley Quinn Smith (Once Upon A Time… In Hollywood)
Aparna Brielle (A.P. Bio)
Shannon Elizabeth (Scary Movie)
Brian O’Halloran (Clerks)
Jason Lee (My Name Is Earl)
Joey Lauren Adams (Chasing Amy)
Jennifer Schwalbach Smith (Yoga Hosers)
Treshelle Edmond (Glee)
Alice Wen (Mr. Student Body President)
Craig Robinson (This is The End)
Joe Manganiello (Justice League)
Justin Long (Tusk)
David Dastmalchian (Reprisal)
Chris Jericho (MacGruber)
Kate Micucci (Mom)
Diedrich Bader (American Housewife)
Melissa Benoist Supergirl)
Val Kilmer (Batmam Forever)
Tommy Chong (That 70s Show)
Ben Affleck (Argo)
Matt Damon (Jason Bourne)
Fred Armisen (The Dictator)
Molly Shannon (Wet Hot American Summer)
Ralph Garman (Ted)
Rosario Dawson (Sin City)
Adam Brody (Jennifer’s Body)
Dan Fogler (Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them)
Jason Biggs (American Pie)
James Van Der Beek (Dawson’s Creek)
Chris Hemsworth (Thor)
Stan Lee (The Avengers)
Marilyn Ghigliotti (Clerks)
Chris Wood (The Vampire Diaries)
Jesse Rath (Supergirl)

Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)In Leonardo, New Jersey, Jay and Silent Bob (Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith) are getting by through growing marijuana in the old RST Video Store, disguised as a chicken sandwich restaurant called “Cock Smoker”. They are raided by a SWAT team and taken to court where they are appointed a lawyer (Justin Long), who makes them sign a document before the trial begins. The lawyer then convinces the judge (Craig Robinson) that their business was actually a temporary pop-up shop promoting an upcoming movie. Jay and Silent Bob win their freedom, but another trial immediately begins. The lawyer switches sides, defending a representative of Saban Films, who optioned Bluntman and Chronic. As Saban is planning a big-budget reboot, Bluntman v Chronic, the lawyer claims that Jay and Bob had legally signed away their naming rights to Saban, and thus cannot self-identify as “Jay and Silent Bob” ever again.Kevin Smith in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)Furious, Jay and Silent Bob visit Brodie Bruce (Jason Lee), whose store, Brodie’s Secret Stash, now operates at the abandoned mall. He tells them about the Bluntman and Chronic reboot, which is being directed by Kevin Smith. The film is largely completed already, but a large action scene is to be shot at the annual fan convention Chronic-Con in Hollywood. Jay and Bob have three days to get to Los Angeles to stop the film from being completed and win back their identities. When the two learn that they are on a No-Fly List, they steal an arrogant businessman’s (Ralph Garman) credit card information and order a Ride Me Now to California.Shannon Elizabeth and Harley Quinn Smith in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)They arrive in Chicago, but when the driver (Fred Armisen) confesses that he has never smoked marijuana, Jay gives him a joint to enjoy as his first. He smokes outside of Mooby’s, where he is immediately arrested while Jay and Bob are distracted. After placing an order, Jay looks at a nearby TV and recognizes Justice (Shannon Elizabeth), his former girlfriend, who is now a weatherperson. Jay and Bob find where Justice lives and pay her a visit. Justice faints in surprise and the duo are then knocked out and taken prisoner by a girl wearing a hockey mask. They awaken, tied up in Justice’s living room, where Justice tells Jay he left her heartbroken by never visiting her in jail. She has since married and given birth to their love child, named Millennium Faulken (Harley Quinn Smith). She introduces Jay to their daughter, but urges Jay to never reveal his identity to her. Outside, Millennium (known as “Milly”), revealed to be the same masked girl from earlier, introduces Jay and Silent Bob to her best friend Soapy (Treshelle Edmond), who is deaf and communicates in sign language.Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)Justice leaves for vacation with her wife Reggie (Rosario Dawson), and Milly forces Jay to take her to Hollywood with him and Bob. They reluctantly agree and take the ride-share. Milly drugs Jay and Bob with a very strong edible, which leads to a dream in which Jay receives parenting advice from Redman and Method Man, the stars of Jay’s favorite film How High. They wake up on a highway in New Orleans, where they meet Milly’s two other friends, Jihad (Aparna Brielle) and Shan Yu (Alice Wen). They tell Jay that they want to visit Chronic-Con because Shan Yu, an immigrant from China, is a huge fan of the first Bluntman and Chronic film and it is her dream to attend Chronic-Con before she has to return to China. They steal a van from a victim Milly seduced through a pedophile chatroom and drive to California. Jay, wanting to be protective of his daughter, asks about her friends. He learns that Jihad was brought to America after her brother tried to kill her for being sexually assaulted. Milly admits that her behavior is attributed to her never knowing her father.Melissa Benoist in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)Jay and Bob are abandoned once again at a Mooby’s, and are confronted by their first ride-share driver, angry at the two for ruining his life. Jay and Bob steal his car and search for the van. They find the van in a vacant area, where the Ku Klux Klan are having a rally. They have kidnapped the girls and plan to kill them. Bob steals a klan hood and passes himself off as the new Grand Dragon to distract them while Jay rescues the girls. In the van, they throw a portable toilet at the Klansmen, covering them in feces, and the group flees from the scene. They make it to California, where Jay tries to bond with Milly, still never revealing their relation per Justice’s wishes. They make it to Chronic-Con where they sneak in. Jay and Bob split with the girls, as they plan to ruin the shoot, but the girls want to be extras in the film to fulfill Shan Yu’s dream. They agree to part ways, with Jay hugging Milly and letting her know he is proud of her.Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)Jay and Bob try to sneak past a familiar security guard (Diedrich Bader), who chases them through panel after panel. They hide in an empty panel room where they are met by Holden McNeil (Ben Affleck). He has just finished recording a podcast with Alyssa Jones (Joey Lauren Adams), who is adapting Holden’s Chasing Amy comic into a Netflix original series. The two have maintained a platonic friendship over the years and Holden has donated his sperm to Alyssa and her wife (Virginia Smith) so they may have a child, whom he helps co-parent. He introduces Jay and Bob to their daughter, Amy (Logan Lee Mewes). Holden tells Jay that fatherhood gave him a new purpose in life. This inspires Jay to abort their mission and be a father to Milly.imagesHolden gives them VIP badges, which grants him and the girls access to the panel with Kevin Smith. After showing a clip of the film, Smith goes backstage to take a break before shooting the big scene. Noticing that Bob bears a great resemblance to Smith, Milly sneaks backstage and knocks out Smith, giving Bob Smith’s clothes to disguise himself. They bring Milly and Shan Yu on stage to film the scene, but Shan Yu sees through their ruse and knocks Bob unconscious, bringing out the real Kevin Smith. Bob is thrown out of the hall and Shan Yu reveals herself to be a Russian spy, bent on destroying American pop culture conventions. After Jay insults Shan Yu, she turns her gun on him, at which point he reveals to Milly that he is her father. Bob regains consciousness outside and steals a large metal “Iron Bob” suit that was to be used in the filming of the scene. Controlling the suit, Bob incites a riot at the panel and disarms Shan Yu and her henchmen.Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)After making their way back home, Jay shows Milly the Quick Stop. Bob brings them coffee as Jay tells Milly his stories of his and Bob’s adventures, including meeting Justice. Dante Hicks (Brian O’Halloran) arrives to open Quick Stop and bemoans the fact that the steel shutters are once again jammed closed. In a post-credits scene, Jay tells Milly that for the past twenty-five years, he and Bob have been pranking Dante by jamming gum in the locks.hero-cFor starters, this is the best movie featuring Jay and Silent Bob. It’s a sequel that improves on the original in every way. If you like these movies, this one has everything you could want and more. Featuring a career-best performance by Jason Mewes, this film explores Jay’s most unlikely path in life, and does so through a screenplay written with such definite heart, it’s no wonder that not making this film was one of Kevin Smith’s regrets during his near-death experience. This film bares the souls of two of the most underrated people in Hollywood, in a way that brought a tear to my eye, something I did not expect coming into the movie. Like the sour patch kids commercials, this film does an excellent job tearing down remakes and reboots while still giving them a lot of love.

REVIEW: JAY & SILENT BOB’S SUPER GROOVY MOVIE

Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)

Starring

Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Kevin Smith (Chasing Amy)
Eliza Dushku (Tru Calling)
Tara Strong (Batman: The Killing Joke)
Ralph Garman (Ted)
Neil Gaiman (Lucifer)
Jon Lovitz (The Simpsons)
Jennifer Schwalbach Smith (Clerks II)
Scott Mosier (Free Birds)
Bryan Johnson (Vulgar)
Walt Flanagan (Dogma)
Kevin Conroy (Batman: TAS)
Brian O’Halloran (Clerks)
Stan Lee (Mallrats)

Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)After winning $10,000,000 from a scratchcard they bought at the Quick Stop, Jay & Silent Bob decide to become superheroes Bluntman and Chronic (a parody of Batman and Robin). They build a secret Fortress of Solitude beneath RST Video and acquire all the necessary gadgets and accessories to make them ideal crime-fighters. They also hire their own butler, Albert (a parody of Alfred Pennyworth).Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)Throughout their crime-fighting ordeals, they manage to accidentally create a few super-powered enemies of their own, who together form “The League of Shitters”. The League of Shitters consists of Lipstick Lesbian, Dickhead, NewsGroup, Cocknocker, and the Diddler. While at a ceremony in which Bluntman and Chronic are to be awarded the key to the city of Red Bank, The League of Shitters attack the dynamic duo and knock them unconscious. They then attempt to infiltrate the “Bluntcave”, resulting in the deaths of NewsGroup and Diddler (they are crushed by a wall that reveals the entrance to the hideout). Lipstick Lesbian mortally stabs Albert in the back and places Bluntman and Chronic into a giant bong that is slowly filling up with water. After leaving the heroes to die, the villains descend upon Red Bank, killing everyone in their path. Albert uses the last of his strength to free the heroes before dying.Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)Vowing to avenge Albert, Bluntman and Chronic fly to Red Bank in the Blunt Jet to save the city from The League of Shitters’ mayhem. An epic fight ensues in which Bluntman subdues Dickhead by tricking him into entering a gay bar and Chronic kills Cocknocker with a broken beer bottle. Lipstick Lesbian draws a gun and attempts to shoot Bluntman and Chronic, but they are miraculously saved by a new heroine, Bluntgirl. Bluntgirl defeats Lipstick Lesbian single-handedly and begins to show romantic interest in Bluntman. Chronic is jealous and expresses his desire for anal sex. Bluntgirl agrees to this, however, she penetrates Chronic with a dildo, much to Chronic’s distaste. Bluntgirl asks Bluntman if he’s ever experienced anything of the like, to which he replies, “Yeah, when Ben Affleck played Daredevil.”. During the credits, it is noted that “Jay and Silent Bob will return in Clerks III.”Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)After the credits, Jay and Silent Bob are visited by Stan Lee, who wishes to speak to them about the “Avenger Initiative”. Shortly after, they are all picked up by Doc Brown, who requests their help in getting back to the future.Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie (2013)If you’re a Kevin Smith fan you’ll love this movie. It’s classic Smith and of course add’s pop culture references like he does in all his movies. If you watched the Clerks Animated TV Series, then you’ll enjoy this as well. It’s done the same way. Don’t expect it to be just like Clerks, or Chasing Amy and Dogma because it’s not. I don’t understand why people don’t enjoy it because its full of hilarious scenes that will have you in tears. I believe people were expecting it to be an animated version of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back sequel.I think the only thing that took me by surprise was that Kevin didn’t direct it him self.

REVIEW: CLERKS II

CAST

Brian O’Halloran (Vulgar)
Jeff Anderson (Now You Know)
Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Kevin Smith (Daredevil)
Ethan Suplee (Raising Hope)
Jennifer Schwalbach Smith (Jersey Girl)
Ben Affleck (Gone Girl)
Trevor Fehrman (Cheats)
Rosario Dawson (Sin City)
Kevin Weisman (Alias)
Jason Lee (My Name Is Earl)
Wanda Sykes (Evan Almighty)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
Harley Quinn Smith (Yoga Hossers)

Eleven years after the events of the first film, Dante (Brian O’Halloran) opens the Quick Stop convenience store to find that it is on fire; Randal (Jeff Anderson) had left the coffee pot on after closing the night before. As a result of the destruction of Quick Stop and the adjacent RST Video, Dante and Randal begin working at a Mooby’s fast food restaurant along with Elias (Trevor Fehrman) and their manager Becky Scott (Rosario Dawson). A year later, Dante is planning to leave his minimum wage lifestyle in favor of a family life in Florida with his fiancée Emma Bunting (Jennifer Schwalbach), whose father will provide them with a home and a business to run. This leaves Randal bitterly disappointed, who fears that with Dante moving to Florida would leave him without his best friend. Jay and Silent Bob (Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith) have since followed Dante and Randal, and now loiter outside of Mooby’s. Jay and Silent Bob no longer do drugs after they were arrested for the possession of drugs and were sent to rehab, and become devout Christians following their release. However, the duo continue selling drugs.
Dante eventually confesses to Becky that he is worried about dancing at his wedding, so she takes him up onto the roof of the restaurant to teach him some moves. Dante soon lets go of his inhibitions and learns how to dance. When the song ends, Dante, caught up in the moment, tells Becky he loves her, and she reveals to him that she is pregnant; Dante and Becky had a one night stand on the prep table a few weeks before. Becky tells Dante not to tell anyone about the baby; however Dante tells Randal, and an angered Becky leaves when she learns that Dante told Randal.

Randal encourages Dante to leave Mooby’s in search for Becky, and in the meantime, sets up a surprise going away party for Dante. Randal hires “Kinky Kelly and the Sexy Stud,” a donkey show with a fog machine. When Dante comes back, he mistakes the fog for a fire and calls the fire department, but upon discovering that it is not a fire, he proceeds to watch the show with Randal, Jay, Silent Bob, and Elias. The group soon discovers that “Kinky Kelly” is, in fact, the donkey, while the man (Zak Knutson), whom Randal thought to be the pimp, is “The Sexy Stud”. When Becky returns, Dante confesses his love for her. As they kiss, Emma arrives. She throws her engagement ring at Becky and angrily walks off.

The fire and police departments soon arrive and discover the show. Dante, Randal, Elias, Jay, Silent Bob, and The Sexy Stud are detained and jailed. Although they are informed they will soon be released, Dante blames Randal for ruining his life and expresses his eagerness to start a new life without Randal, while Randal condemns Dante for his willingness to live his life under the standards of others and for walking out of their friendship. Amid the argument, Randal proposes that they buy the Quick Stop and re-open it, although Dante says that neither have the money to purchase the store. Jay and Silent Bob offer to lend them some money (from the royalties they collected following the events of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) on the condition that they can hangout outside of the Quick Stop anytime they want. Randal accepts their offer, but Dante remains skeptical, prompting Randal to emotionally confess his fear of losing Dante. As a result, Dante agrees to the proposition as well, and after his release, he proposes to Becky, who accepts. After the Quick Stop and RST Video are rebuilt, Elias applies for a job and is hired at RST Video. In the very last scene, with the store open, Dante says, “Can you feel it? Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.”

If you’re a fan of adult humour (or just enjoyed the original) then this is definitely one for you. Of course, if, like me, you’re a die-hard fan of Kevin Smith’s films, you’ll get added enjoyment out of Clerks II as it’s part of his ‘Askewniverse’ where all his films are interlinked and there are plenty of references to past situations and charters.

REVIEW: CLERKS: THE ANIMATED SERIES

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CAST (VOICES)

Jeff Anderson (Now You Know)
Brian O’Halloran (Vulgar)
Kevin Smith (Fanboys)
Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
Alex Baldwin (Mission Impossible 5)
Charles Barkley (Space Jam)

Clerks-Animated-Series-Revival-20th-Anniversary-Kevin-Smith

NOTABLE GUESTS

Gwyneth Paltrow (Iron Man)
Gilbert Goffried (Superman: TAS)
Bryan Cranston (Godzilla)
Judge Reinhold (Beverly Hills Cop)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enterprise)
Lauren Tom (Bad Santa)
Lisa Spoonauer (Clerks)
Tara Strong (Batman: The Killing Joke)
Brian Posehn (The Big Bang Theory)
Michael McKean (Smallville)
Kerri Kenney (Anger Management)
Mark McKinney (3rd Rock From The Sun)

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Clerks: The Animated Series is the cartoon TV show based on the 1995 Kevin Smith movie of the same name, that ran for a short period of time during 2000 (although was not shown in the UK until 2006). Each episode includes the four main characters from the movie(s) (Randal, Dante, Jay and Silent Bob) and follows events at and around the Quick-Stop, the convenience store where the lead characters work. The series features the voices of the original cast as well as a new villian, Leonardo Leonardo, voiced by Alec Baldwin. If you enjoy shows like Family Guy, South Park and The Simpsons and have seen some of the films of Kevin Smith, then there is no doubting that you will love this show. Unfortunately there were only 6 episodes made (all of which are on this DVD) but the quality of each is so good that you are guaranteed to watch them over and over again. Each episode also has an introduction from Jay & Silent Bob (Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith) which is equally hilarious as the shows themselves.tumblr_inline_nw88muwE4z1t0ijhl_1280A quality show on a decent DVD package including some fairly good special features. Well worth importing, especially at it’s low price, and is a must for any fan of Kevin Smith.

REVIEW: JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK

CAST

Jason Mewes (Bottoms Up)
Kevin Smith (Daredevil)
Ben Affleck (Batman v Superman)
Jeff Anderson (Now You Know)
Brian O’Halloran (Vulgar)
Shannon Elizabeth (Scary Movie)
Eliza Dushku (Tru Calling)
Ali Larter (Heroes)
Jennifer Schwalbach Smith (Jersey Girl)
Will Ferrell (Elf)
Jason Lee (My Name Is earl)
Judd Nelson (Steel)
George Carlin (Dogma)
Carrie Fisher (Fanboys)
Seann William Scott (Welcome To The Jungle)
Jon Stewart (The Faculty)
Tracy Morgan (Cop Out)
Chris Rock (Madagascar)
Jamie Kennedy (Son of The Mask)
Wes Craven (Sceam)
Shannen Doherty (Mallrats)
Mark Hamill (The Flash)
Marc Blucas (Bufy: The Vampire Slayer)
Harley Quinn Smith (Yoga Hossers)
Diedrich Bader (American Hosuewife)
Scott Mosier (Clerks)
Ever Carradine (Runaways)
Bryan Johnson (Vulgar)
Renée Humphrey (Fun)
Joey Lauren Adams (Harvard man)
Dwight Ewell (Dogma)
Alanis Morissette (Top Wing)
James Van Der Beek (Dawnsons Creek)
Jason Biggs (American Pie)
Matt Damon (The Bourne Identity)
Scott William Winters (OZ)

Jay-and-Silent-Bob-Strike-Back-Main-ReviewAfter getting a restraining order from Randal Graves (Clerks) for selling drugs outside the Quick Stop, Jay and Silent Bob find out from Brodie Bruce (Mallrats) that Bluntman and Chronic, the comic book based on their likenesses, has been adapted into a film in production by Miramax Films. In response, the two see Holden McNeil (Chasing Amy), the co-writer of Bluntman and Chronic for the royalties of the film. However, Holden tells Jay and Silent Bob that he sold his part of the creative and publishing rights of the comic over to his former friend Banky Edwards. Upon learning of the film, as well as the negative reaction it has received so far on the Internet, the two set out on a quest to Hollywood, to prevent the film from being made and tainting their image, or at the very least receive the money from the royalties owed to them.
On the way, they befriend an animal liberation group, consisting of four women: Justice, Sissy, Missy, and Chrissy; and one man, Brent, who they had picked up for the cause. It is revealed that the organization is a front; Brent is a patsy, intended as a diversion by freeing an animal from a testing laboratory while the girls rob a diamond depository nearby. Jay tricks Brent and throws him out of the van in order to get closer to Justice, with whom he is smitten. Justice, who becomes close to Jay and Silent Bob (particularly the former), reluctantly accepts the two as the new patsies. While the girls are robbing the diamond depository they accidentally set off the alarm, prompting them to break the glass and steal the diamonds. While this is going on Jay and Silent Bob free the animals and take an orangutan named Suzanne with them. They escape outside to see the police arriving and the van exploding, which they believe has killed the girls.Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)Jay then takes the orangutan with him as a memorial to Justice. Quickly afterwards, Federal Wildlife Marshal Willenholly (whose name is taken from the three characters in the TV show Land of the Lost: Marshal, Will and Holly) shows up at the scene. Blinded to the diamond heist, he claims to have jurisdiction because of the large number of animals that escaped. He learns that all the animals have been recovered except for the orangutan. The officers then find and watch footage of a video Sissy recorded of Jay making remarks about “the clit”, claiming to be “the Clit commander.” The literature accompanying the tape says that “Clit” is an acronym for Coalition for the Liberation of Itinerant Tree-Dwellers. Willenholly blindly finds this as an act of terrorism and calls for police support to hunt down what he considered “the two most dangerous men on the planet.”
When the officers later have the trio cornered inside a diner and threaten to open fire, Jay and Silent Bob dress the orangutan as a child and walk out, claiming that they want to get their “son” out of the danger zone. Willenholly, thinking about the political repercussions of arresting a gay couple, decides to let them leave, but he quickly realizes his mistake and resumes the chase. When they jump into a sewer system, only Willenholly himself follows them while the other police officers, led by the Sheriff, leave him, and he is soon tricked into jumping off of a dam. Having escaped the law, Jay and Silent Bob once again return to their quest to reach Hollywood, only to have Suzanne taken by a Hollywood animal acting agency car. Now on a quest to get their ape back and to clear their names, the two once again embark to Hollywood.

On their arrival in Hollywood, the two find themselves in the background of an E! News newscast (ironically about their threat against Miramax on the Internet) that Justice is watching. While Justice takes the diamonds and goes to Hollywood to set things right, Marshal Willenholly learns of their mission to reach Hollywood and leaves to find them. After a long chase with studio security and reclaiming Suzanne from a fictional Scream 4 in production, Jay and Silent Bob end up in Jason Biggs and James Van Der Beek’s dressing room, where they quickly realize that these are the actors that will play the roles of Bluntman and Chronic. Suzanne beats both of them up effortlessly and Jay and Silent Bob assume the roles of their characters. Production staff throw them on stage with racist director Chaka Luther King, and they must engage in a duel with Mark Hamill playing a comic book supervillain called Cocknocker. jaysilentbob4png.pngEventually Willenholly arrives to capture Jay and Silent Bob, but Justice arrives to save them. Justice admits that the CLIT organization was not real and that the two were used as a diversion while she, Missy, Sissy and Chrissy, were stealing jewels. As the rest of jewel thieves arrive, a climactic final battle ensues, after which Jay and Silent Bob get their royalties to the film from Banky, and Justice turns herself and her former team in to Willenholly in exchange for a shorter sentence and letting Jay and Silent Bob go.  The film ends with Jay and Silent Bob spending their royalty to locate everyone who expressed negative opinions on the internet about the movie and characters, ranging from kids to clergy, and traveling to their towns to beat them up. The scene then cuts to everyone leaving a movie theater, having just watched the Bluntman and Chronic movie and expressing negative reception: Hooper X calls the film a “one 90-minute-long gay joke.” Jay and Silent Bob, with Justice and Willenholly, then go across the street to enjoy a performance from Morris Day and The Time. After the credits, God closes the View Askewniverse book.I love Jay and Silent Bob,Kevin Smith is an amazing director/writer and since arriving on the scene with Clerks the adventures on the king of stoners Jay and Bob have got better and better. This film is just laugh out loud gags from start to finish with so many massive stars putting in cameos including Chris Rock who is brilliant in his small role in the film It also features Will Ferrell as a wildlife marshall with half a brain. A must have for Kevin Smith fans and comedy fans alike

REVIEW: VULGAR

CAST

Brian O’Halloran (Clerks)
Bryan Johnson (Mallrats)
Jerry Lewkowitz (Dadetown)
Ethan Suplee (My Name Is Earl)
Matthew Maher (Gone Baby Gone)
Kevin Smith (Daredevil)
Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Jeff Anderson (Now You Know)

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Will Carlson is a 20-something loser who lives in a rundown neighborhood in New Jersey, where he ekes out a living as a birthday party clown in order to pay the rent for his abusive mother’s nursing home and the rent on his rundown house. Despite the difficulties of the job, clowning is Will’s one escape from the realities of his miserable existence: Will genuinely likes kids, and takes great joy from making them happy on their birthdays.
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Struggling to make ends meet, but not wanting to give up his dream job, Will comes up with the idea to be a “bachelor party clown.” Will’s idea is that men throwing bachelor parties can hire him as well as a stripper; Will enters the room prior to the “real” entertainment, wearing clown makeup and lingerie, tricking the bachelor into thinking that there was a mix-up and a gay clown stripper has been sent in lieu of a female one. Will invents the persona of Vulgar the Clown (after his friend Syd tells him that the entire idea is “vulgar”) and solicits himself in the want-ads. Before long, he is hired to appear at a bachelor party being held at a nearby motel.  When Will arrives for the party — wearing stockings, garters, clown makeup, and a trench-coat — he is attacked and brutally beaten by a middle-aged man, Ed, and his sons Gino and Frankie. The three men then proceed to gang rape Will, taking turns videotaping the attack. The trio hold Will hostage in the motel room for an indeterminate amount of time, during which they subject him to a series of violent and humiliating sexual assaults. They also break a bottle over his head and drug him.Vulgar-2000-movie-Bryan-Johnson-3A tearful Will goes home and spends the remainder of the night and part of the next morning crying while he washes himself clean in the bathtub.Will spends a considerable amount of time after the attack in a crippling depression, which nearly costs him his home. Eventually, Will fulfills a promise to appear as a clown at one of his past-clients’ children’s party. When he gets to the party, Will discovers a hostage crisis is occurring; the father of one of the children, in the middle of divorce proceedings, has kidnapped his own daughter and is threatening to kill her. In a near-suicidal reaction, Will sneaks past the police barricade, breaks into the house, and subdues the father. News reporters capture some of the event on film, and before long the story makes national headlines. Will becomes known as “the hero clown;” the attention and outpouring of support breaks him out of his depression, and he is eventually given his own syndicated children’s television show.

The media coverage attracts the attention of Ed and his sons (who are still raping young men). They threaten Will with a copy of the tape of his being raped (edited to look like amateur porn) and begin to extort him. When Will tries to pay the men off, they attack him in a bathroom stall. Will finally strikes an agreement with the men wherein he will come to a motel room and “perform” for them, allowing himself to be taken advantage of again, and they will give him all of the copies of the tape; secretly, Will plans to ambush and murder them with the help of Syd. When the time comes, the gun jams and Will finds himself unable to kill his tormentors. Just as Ed and his sons move in to rape and murder Will, Ed’s son Frankie accidentally shoots himself in the face. Then, a shootout ensues with a vagrant lowlife at the hotel, who robs Syd and then plots to do the same to the others. Both the man and Ed’s other son (Gino) are shot to death. Ed panics, and Will chases him through the motel parking lot to a nearby playground. As Will approaches him, Ed has a massive heart attack and starts to die. Will takes off as he hears police sirens coming. His conscience clear, Will retrieves the tape and goes on to live happily ever after, hosting his television show.

Extended ending

The director’s cut DVD features an extended ending, wherein Will finds a note from Syd along with a clipped newspaper article on the Fanelli’s death, Ed’s heart failure from panic and overdose of crack cocaine, as well as attributing Ed’s sons’ (as well as the vagrant lowlife’s) deaths to a random incidence of criminal violence and natural circumstance. A stunned Will determines that the men’s deaths were all karmic retribution.UntitledA really was a very good film, but it has never come out in the uk, so the only way to get hold of it is to get the R1 version

REVIEW: DOGMA

CAST

Matt Damon (Oceans Eleven)
Ben Affleck (Gone Girl)
George Carlin (Jersey Girl)
Brian O’Halloran (Clerks)
Linda Fiorentino (Men In Black)
Janeane Garofalo (Wet Hot American Summer)
Jason Lee (My Name Is Earl)
Alan Rickman (Harry Potter)
Jason Mewes (R.S.V.P.)
Kevin Smith (Daredevil)
Jeff Anderson (Now You Know)
Chris Rock (Death at A Funeral)
Salma Hayek (Traffic)
Dwight Ewell (Chasing Amy)
Ethan Suplee (Fanboys)
Alanis Morissette (Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back)
Bryan Johnson (Vulgar)
Scott Mosier (Clerks)

Bartleby (Affleck) and Loki (Damon) are fallen angels, banished for eternity from Heaven to Wisconsin for insubordination after an inebriated Loki (with Bartleby’s encouragement) resigned as the Angel of Death. When the trendy Cardinal Glick (Carlin) announces that he is rededicating his cathedral in Red Bank, New Jersey in the image of the “Buddy Christ”, the angels see their salvation: Anyone entering the cathedral during the rededication festivities will receive a plenary indulgence; all punishment for sin will be remitted, permitting direct entry into Heaven.[5] They receive encouragement from an unexpected source: Azrael (Lee), a demon, once a Muse, also banished from Heaven (for refusing to take sides in the battle between God and Lucifer); and the Stygian Triplets (Barret Hackney, Jared Pfennigwerth, and Kitao Sakurai), three teenage hoodlums who serve Azrael in Hell.
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Bethany Sloane (Fiorentino)—a downhearted, infertile, divorced abortion clinic employee—attends a service at her church in Illinois. Donations are being solicited to help a hospitalized, comatose homeless man—known only as John Doe Jersey (Cort)—who was beaten senseless outside a skee ball arcade in New Jersey by the Triplets. Later that day, Metatron (Rickman)—the Voice of God—appears to Bethany in a pillar of fire and declares that she is the last relative of Jesus Christ. He explains that Bartleby and Loki cannot be allowed to succeed: By re-entering Heaven, they would be overruling the word of God, thereby disproving the fundamental concept of God’s omnipotence, and nullifying all of existence. She, together with two prophets who will appear to her, must stop the angels and save the universe.
Now a target, Bethany is attacked by the Triplets, and is rescued by the two foretold prophets—drug-dealing stoners named Jay and Silent Bob (Mewes and Smith). Azrael then summons a Golgothan (a vile creature made of human excrement) to find and kill Bethany, but Silent Bob immobilizes it with aerosol deodorant. Other allies in Bethany’s mission are Rufus (Rock), the thirteenth apostle (never mentioned in the Bible, he says, because he is black), and Serendipity (Hayek), the fickle Muse of creative Inspiration, now working in a strip club in search of inspiration of her own. On a train to New Jersey, a drunken Bethany reveals her mission to Bartleby, who tries to kill her; a melee ensues, and Silent Bob throws the angels off the train. Bartleby and Loki now realize the potential consequences of their scheme; and while Loki wants no part of destroying all existence, Bartleby remains angry at God for his expulsion—and for granting free will to humans while demanding servitude of angels—and to Loki’s horror, resolves to proceed.
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Bethany and her allies discuss the situation: Who is really behind the angels’ plan, and why has God not intervened? Metatron explains that God’s whereabouts are unknown; he disappeared while visiting New Jersey in human form to play skee ball. At the cathedral, the group attempts in vain to persuade Cardinal Glick to cancel the celebration; Jay angrily steals Glick’s golf club.
At a nearby bar, Azrael captures Bethany and her protectors and reveals that he is the mastermind behind the angels’ plan—he would rather not exist at all than spend eternity in Hell. Silent Bob kills Azrael with Glick’s blessed golf club. Serendipity tells Bethany to bless the bar sink, turning its contents to holy water, and Jay, Rufus and Serendipity drown the Triplets in it. Bartleby and Loki reach the cathedral; Bartleby kills all the celebrants, and when Loki attempts to stop him he tears off Loki’s wings, making him mortal. When the protectors block Bartleby’s entry into the church, Bartleby kills Loki and fights off Rufus, Serendipity and Bob, but as he flees, Jay shoots off his wings with a machine gun.
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During his latest of several attempts to seduce Bethany, Jay mentions John Doe Jersey. Realizing that the homeless man is the mortal form that God assumed, Bethany and Bob race to the hospital. Bethany disconnects John Doe’s life support, liberating God, but killing herself. As Bartleby again attempts to enter the cathedral, God manifests before him as a woman (Morissette), and kills him with the power of her voice. When Bob arrives with Bethany’s lifeless body, God resurrects her and conceives a child within her womb. God, Metatron, Rufus, and Serendipity return to Heaven, leaving Bethany and the two prophets to reflect on what has happened.
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Never really showing its age, this film can be an awesome introduction to Kevin Smith’s world. Highly recommended.