REVIEW: LEGEND (1985)

CAST

Tom Cruise (Mission Impossible)
Mia Sara (Birds of Prey)
Tim Curry (IT)
David Bennent (The Tin Drum)
Alice Playten  (The Rebound)
Billy Barty (Masters of The Universe)
Kiran Shah (The Hobbit)
Robert Picardo (Stargate: Atlantis)

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“Once, long ago”, the ancient Lord of Darkness (Tim Curry) laments his isolation in the shadows before sensing the presence of two unicorns who safeguard the Power of Light; whereupon Darkness instructs Blix (Alice Playten) and his fellow goblins Pox (Peter O’Farrell) and Blunder (Kiran Shah) to kill the unicorns and bring him their horns to free himself. Meanwhile, Princess Lily (Mia Sara), a mischievous and vibrant girl goes alone to the forest to meet her love interest Jack (Tom Cruise), an adventurous forest dweller who teaches her the languages of animals before showing her the unicorns as he promised he would someday do. Against Jack’s pleas, Lily approaches the stallion to stroke him, making him distracted and the perfect target for a poisoned dart from Blix’s blowpipe. Once hit, the unicorns bolt, and Lily makes light of Jack’s fears and sets him a challenge by throwing her ring into a pond, declaring that she will marry whoever finds it.Jack, proving his love to Lily, dives into the pond to retrieve it. As the stallion dies from the poison and the goblins seize his horn, the forest and the pond freeze, setting the mortal realm into an apocalyptic winter. Lily runs off in terror before Jack can break the surface of the frozen pond. Taking refuge in a frozen cottage, Lily overhears the goblins talking about their slaying of the unicorn and testing the alicorn’s magical powers. She follows them to a rendevouz with Darkness, who orders them to hunt down the mare. In a fit of overconfidence, Blunder challenges Darkness with the stallion’s horn in hand, but is instead restrained and taken away.legend

In the forest, Jack encounters the elf Honeythorn Gump (David Bennent, voiced by Alice Playten). Joined by Gump, the fairy Oona (Annabelle Lanyon), and the dwarves Brown Tom and Screwball (Cork Hubbert and Billy Barty), Jack searches for Lily before coming across the lifeless stallion and his mate. Knowing that the horn must be recovered and returned to the stallion, Jack is led by Gump and the others to a cache of ancient weapons while Brown Tom guards the mare. Lily, attempting to make amends for her role in the stallion’s death, is captured alongside the mare after Brown Tom is knocked out. Learning what has transpired, Jack and his group enter the ancient temple in the marshes where Darkness resides. Though Jack deals with the swamp hag Meg Mucklebones (Robert Picardo), he and his group fall into a pit trap that takes them to dungeon. There they encounter Blunder, revealed to be a disguised elf, before he is dragged off by the ogre chefs to be cooked into a pie. Oona saves Jack and the others, and they resume searching for Lily and the mare.scenery

Having fallen in love with Lily, Darkness tempts her; and Lily agrees to wed him on the condition that she kills the mare in the upcoming ritual. Overhearing their conversation, Jack and Gump learn that Darkness can be destroyed by daylight. While saving Blunder, the group take giant metal platters to reflect the sunlight to the chamber where the mare is to be sacrificed. As the ritual begins, Lily frees the unicorn, but is knocked out by Darkness.legend01-1170x497Jack fights Darkness while the others relay the light of the setting sun. Jack loses his sword when Darkness has the upper-hand, but then uses the horn from the stallion to stab him. Darkness screams in pain as he removes the horn, and is then exposed to sunlight. Once hit by the light, Darkness is expelled to the edge of a cliff, but uses the unicorn’s horn to hold on. Knowing there is no physical escape, Darkness laughs at Jack and warns him that evil lurks in everyone. Therefore, even though they can kill him, they will never truly defeat him. Jack strikes Darkness’ hand, releasing the unicorn’s horn, and Darkness is expelled into the stars. As Gump returns the stallion’s horn, returning him to life, Jack retrieves the ring from the pond and returns it to Lily, reviving her.

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Alternative endings

The film concludes (depending on its targeted market) with one of two endings:
In the original version (as well as the Director’s Cut), Lily wakes with Jack trying to convince her she was merely dreaming, but she is ultimately unconvinced. Despite this, these events they’ve gone through proves that they live in two different worlds, which cause them to continue their platonic relationship. Lily returns to her home, but not until after she promises to visit Jack again. In the final segment, Jack happily runs off into the sunset, hailed by the forest fairies and the revived unicorns.kuqi4kz
In the American theatrical version, Jack and Lily assure each other of their love, and watch the unicorns reunite. After bidding a distant farewell to the forest fairies and the unicorns, they run off into the sunset together, hailed by the forest fairies and the unicorns. This version ends with Darkness making a final appearance before the end credits, laughing sinisterly.maxresdefaultHighly recommended for fantasy fans, Ridley Scott, Tim Curry and Mia Sara fans and those interested in artfully presented effects. Recommended for fans of Pan’s Labyrinth and Mirrormask. The best version is the Director’s Cut featured on Blu-ray. It runs alot longer than any of the other cuts and it is the most coherent cut as well and it features the score by Jerry Goldsmith.

 

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REVIEW: BURKE & HARE

CAST

Simon Pegg (Star Trek)
Andy Serkis (Lord of The Rings)
Isla Fisher (Grimsby)
Tom Wilkinson (Batman Begins)
Tim Curry (IT)
Jessica Hynes (Spaced)
Bill Bailey (Hot Fuzz)
Hugh Bonneville (Blow Dry)
Christopher Lee (The Hobbit)
Jenny Agutter (The Avengers)
Georgia King (Wild Child)
Stephen Merchant (Logan)

The film opens in Edinburgh. Narration by Angus the Hangman explains how the corpses of the hanged are transported to Dr Robert Knox for dissection. Knox’s rival, Dr Alexander Monro, wants the steady supply of cadavers but is forced to rely on severed limbs for dissection. Monro’s assistant Charles Darwin arrives with a forged letter directing that all corpses thenceforth must be sent to Monro. Angus tells Knox’s assistant, Patterson, the news. Patterson delivers the message to Knox. William Burke and William Hare, immigrants from Ulster, attempt to sell cheese mould as a patent medicine. When their fraud is discovered, they flee to an inn owned by Hare’s wife, Lucky. She tells them that one of the lodgers has died. Burke and Hare decide to sell the corpse to Knox. They are forced to break the corpse’s spine to fit it into a barrel in order to smuggle it through the city. They stop at a pub along the way, where a young former prostitute, Ginny Hawkins, loudly performs an excerpt from Macbeth. The patrons ignore her. Burke asks her why she did this, and she says that it is her ambition to become an actress. They share a drink; Hare reminds Burke that they must continue to Knox’s house.
Burke and Hare present the now-mangled corpse to Knox. After some negotiation, Knox agrees to pay them a good sum of money for each corpse they bring him for dissection. Burke plans to use his money to finance Ginny’s theatrical ambitions, and Hare decides to open a funeral parlour. Returning to the inn, they find Lucky drunk and barely conscious. Lucky says she is drinking because Joseph, another lodger at the inn, is near death. Not willing to wait for the outcome, Burke and Hare suffocate Joseph and take the body to Knox.
Afterward, Burke tells Ginny about the money. She allows him to take her home. Hare meets Fergus, the henchman of villain Danny McTavish, at a bar. Fergus says that McTavish uses him to cheat at games of chance, but keeps all the winnings for himself. Hare details the arrangement with Knox. Fergus relays the information to McTavish. Burke is kidnapped from Ginny’s side and bundled into a horse carriage by McTavish and Fergus, who have already captured Hare. McTavish threatens to kill them unless they give him half the money from Knox. Forced to agree, they are then thrown from the carriage. As they trod back to the inn, they plan a string of murders to make up their losses to McTavish. Lucky becomes suspicious of the mounting death toll, as does Police Captain Tom McLintock. McLintock seeks the advice of Lord Harrington and William Wordsworth, who give permission to hunt down the criminals and have them hanged.
McTavish kidnaps Hare again and attempts to extort the remainder of the money. Shortly afterward, McTavish appears as Knox’s next dissection cadaver. McLintock takes notice. He arrests Burke and Ginny, and Hare and Lucky, while both couples are having sex. He tells them that if any one of them confesses to the murders, the others will go free. Burke agrees to confess if he and Ginny can finish what they were doing when McLintock apprehended them. Just before Burke’s hanging, Angus advises him to speak if he has any final words. Burke sees Ginny in the crowd, and says, “I did it for love.” Onscreen text over the credits describes the fates of all the characters in the story, concluding with an image of the actual skeleton of William Burke at the Anatomical Museum of the University of Edinburgh Medical School.By and large, I really enjoyed Bukre and Hare. The biggest challenge the story faced was turning two mass murderers into characters you can follow, laugh with and have empathy for and I think this film does it really well. As Burke is talked into the business with Hare, there’s never the slightest feeling that his friend is purposefully leading him down a path to his own downfall, unlike the real Hare who gave Burke up in the end to escape a public hanging. Another element of the movie which was enjoyable was seeing so many familiar faces turning up in smaller roles; Ronnie Corbett decked out in his red and blue uniform as Captain McLintock, Christopher Lee as Old Joseph, one of Buke and Hare’s early unfortunates and perhaps the most hilarious scene of all is when they push Paul Whitehouse down a flight of stairs! It’s a good one to see if you’re after something dark and funny on Halloween.

REVIEW: STEPHEN KING’S IT (1990)

CAST

Tim Curry (Legend)
Harry Anderson (The Escape Artist)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Dennis Christopher (Fade To Black)
Richard Masur (The Burning Bed)
Annette O’ Toole (Smallville)
Emily Perkins (Ginger Snaps)
Tim Reid (That 70s Show)
John Ritter (Bad Santa)
Richard Thomas (The Waltons)
Jonathan Brandis ( Seaquest)
Michael Cole (Chuka)
Olivia Hussey (Black Christmas)
Garry Chalk (Arrow)

In Derry, Maine, 1960, a young boy named George “Georgie” Denbrough is lured to a storm drain by a strange, yet seemingly kind, man dressed in a clown costume named Pennywise. After a brief conversation, Pennywise reveals his malevolent nature and murders Georgie. Georgie’s older brother Bill is taunted by Pennywise as well. He and six other outcast children, who form a group called the Losers Club, discover they are all being tormented by the ambiguous clown. The rest of the group consists of the overweight but smart Ben Hanscom, asthmatic Eddie Kaspbrak who lives with his overprotective mother, Beverly Marsh who lives with her alcoholic father, comical Richie Tozier, Jewish boy scout Stan Uris, and African-American student Mike Hanlon. In turn, all of them are bullied by the psychotic Henry Bowers and his gang.

The Losers soon theorize that Pennywise is not a human being, he is instead an otherworldly creature that surfaces every thirty years in Derry to murder children and therefore they dub him “It”. To avenge Georgie and others killed by It, the Losers venture into the sewers where the clown lurks. They are followed by Henry and his friends Victor Criss and Belch Huggins, who threaten Stan, only for It to kill Victor and Belch, but spares the terrified Henry, whose hair turns white. It, as Pennywise, catches up to the Losers and grabs Stan, bragging that he is immortal and eats children. Guessing It’s powers are based around imagination, the Losers fight back using the same power, melting Pennywise’s face with imaginary battery acid and Beverly smashes a hole in his head using a silver projectile. Pennywise escapes wounded, and the seven make a promise to return and kill him should It resurface. Henry is arrested and institutionalized when he confesses to murdering his friends and the children It killed.

Thirty years later, in 1990, Pennywise returns and begins murdering children in Derry. Mike, a librarian still living in Derry, summons his six friends back to Derry to fulfil their vow. Bill has become a horror novelist married to actress Audra Phillips, Ben is an architect, Beverly is a fashion designer but in an unhappy relationship, Richie is a late night TV comedian, Eddie runs a limousine service but still lives with his mother, and Stan is a real estate broker. While five of them agree to come, Stan commits suicide in his bath tub and writes “It” on the wall in blood. The remaining six are individually scared by Pennywise, before reuniting for dinner, though Pennywise frightens them there too. They soon learn of Stan’s suicide shortly after.

Elsewhere, an older Henry is visited and befriended by Pennywise who sends him to Derry to kill the Losers. Audra also arrives in town following Bill but falls victim to It’s paralyzing “deadlights” and falls into a catatonic state. Henry wounds Mike, but is killed by his own knife during a scuffle with the other Losers. With Mike hospitalised, the five remaining Losers decide to destroy It for good. They confront It, who now appears as a monstrous spider. Eddie is killed by It, but Beverly mortally wounds It with her slingshot, and the Losers tear the spider apart. They remove the comatose Audra and Eddie’s body from the sewers, burying him in Derry’s cemetery.
The Losers go their separate ways, free from It’s torment forever. Richie is cast in a film, Beverly and Ben get married and are expecting their first child, and Mike recovers. Bill manages to coax Audra out of her catatonia by going on a ride on his childhood bicycle, which had once freed a young Stan from his fear. With It gone, the Losers can move on with their lives and leave Derry behind.Tim Curry is amazing as Pennywise, bringing a truly terrifying dimension to the evil clown. There are incredible performances from the child stars, all of whom are engaging and. The adult versions of the children are also excellent, particularly Tim Reid, Richard Thomas and, of course, the late, great John Ritter.  It’s worth mentioning that the DVD of “Stephen King’s It” contains an excellent commentary by the actors mentioned and the director, Tommy Lee Wallace (who also directed “Halloween 3:Season Of The Witch”). It is full of great trivia and anecdotes and John Ritter’s charisma and genuine love of the project shines through. So if you’re a fan of great horror and don’t mind developing a fear of clowns, then I highly recommend this under-rated gem of a movie!

REVIEW: SCARY MOVIE 2

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CAST

Anna Faris (Mom)
Marlon Wayans (Fifty Shades of Black)
Regina Hall (Love & Basketball)
Shawn Wayans (Little Man)
Chris Masterson (American History X)
Kathleen Robertson (Bates Motel)
David Cross (Kill Your Darlings)
James Woods (Another Day In Paradise)
Tim Curry (IT)
Tori Spelling (Samllville)
Chris Elliott (How I Met Your Mother)
Andy Richter (Dr. Dolittle 2)
Richard Moll (Scooby Doo 4)
Veronica Cartwirght (The Birds)
Natasha Lyonne (American Pie)
James DeBello (Cabin Fever)

The film opens with a parody of The Exorcist, during which a teenage girl, Megan Voorhees (Natasha Lyonne), becomes possessed by the spirit of Hugh Kane, the previous owner of the House. Megan’s mother (Veronica Cartwright) calls in two priests, Father McFeely (James Woods) and Father Harris (Andy Richter), who visit the house. After Father McFeely pays a trip to the toilet, the men attempt to drive Hugh’s ghost out, but the exorcism does not go as planned, resulting in a chain of projectile vomit and various instances of pedophilia. Finally, Father McFeely responds to an insult towards his mother by shooting Megan.Meanwhile, Cindy Campbell, Brenda Meeks, Ray Wilkins, and Shorty Meeks are at college, trying to live new lives following the events of the previous film (although most of them actually died in the first film, Brenda claims in a deleted scene that her death was a near-death experience). Cindy and Brenda get tagged by a socially maladjusted girl, Alex (Tori Spelling). Shorty is still the same stoner he was before. Ray, still confused about his sexuality, has two new male friends, Tommy (James DeBello) and Buddy (Christopher Masterson).A charming (yet lecherous) teacher, Professor Oldman (Tim Curry) and his paraplegic assistant, Dwight Hartman (David Cross), plan to study the paranormal activity at a local haunted mansion called Hell House (the same house involved in the opening scene) using the clueless teens. Meanwhile, Buddy’s advances are spurned by Cindy, who is recovering from her previous relationship. When Cindy is the first to arrive at Hell House, she encounters a vulgar parrot (Matt Friedman), and the caretaker, Hanson (Chris Elliot), who has a badly malformed hand. Later that evening, the group, including sexy newcomer Theo (Kathleen Robertson), sit down for dinner. Unfortunately, everybody loses their appetite due to Hanson’s repulsive antics.In the night, Cindy hears voices directing her to a secret room, where she and Buddy discover a treasure chest containing the diary of the wife of the house’s deceased owner, Hugh Kane (Richard Moll). They also find an old portrait of the wife and note Cindy’s resemblance to her. Meanwhile, many of the teens fall victim to violent attacks. The ghost of Hugh Kane has sex with Alex in her bedroom, yet departs in the morning when Alex expresses her interest in becoming the new Mrs. Kane. Cindy gets involved in a fistfight with the house cat, Mr. Kittles. A toy clown (Suli McCullough) attempts to kill Ray—but thanks to some quick thinking, Ray perversely turns the tables and rapes the clown. A weed-monster turns Shorty into a joint and tries to smoke him—fortunately, the plant gets distracted by munchies and lets him escape.Oldman is seduced and killed by the disfigured ghost of the murdered mistress. Shorty later encounters the same ghost, yet he seduces her instead. After Dwight equips the teens with weapons that can injure their spectral enemy, they are pursued throughout the mansion. Buddy and Cindy get locked in the refrigerator. Thinking that Buddy is dying from an encounter with the ghost, Cindy gives him a handjob, only to end up being blasted to the door by an explosion of Buddy’s semen (something reminiscent of her sexual moment with Bobby Prinze in the first film). The couple then escape the room following a convoluted deus ex machina, in which Cindy uses a collection of random objects in the room to somehow produce a Caterpillar tractor, which she drives through the wall.Hanson himself gets possessed by Kane. Hanson kidnaps Shorty, who has put himself on drugs. Cindy discovers Hanson cooking a meal for Shorty in the dining room. Hanson has cut the top of Shorty’s head off. When Hanson takes off the top of Shorty’s head, his brain is a small man rapping (Beetlejuice). Cindy, Brenda, and Theo team up to fight him, but wind up defeated when they are in their bra and underwear. Eventually, Dwight and the teens regroup, and agree to use Cindy as bait to lure Kane into a device that will destroy him. Just as they activate the device, they realize Cindy is still standing on it. Ray springs to action and saves her. The plan succeeds, freeing the group from the house’s curse.Image result for SCARY MOVIE 2Two months later, Cindy and Buddy are in a relationship and go out for a walk. However, Buddy disappears without notice when Cindy discovers Hanson at the hot dog stand. As Cindy backs away in fear, Hanson pursues her, and, in the midst of screaming, gets struck by a red car driven by Shorty, who is receiving a blowjob from the ghost that he seduced earlier in the film. This scene is similar to the ending scene in the first film, where a car strikes Cindy while she is screaming. The song that Shorty is listening to in the car during the ending scene is Ride Wit Me by Nelly, and the song continues into the credits as the movie ends.The Sequel to the awesome Scary Movie film will not dissapoint and has quite a lot of funny moments, the waynes brothers deliver a enjoyable film spoofing horror films. The whole the film has a lot of laughs to be had.

REVIEW: GARFIELD 1 & 2

 

CAST
Breckin Meyer (Road Trip)
Jennifer Love Hewitt (Ghost Whisperer)
Stephen Tobolowsky (Heroes)
Bill Murray (St. Vincent)
Evan Arnold (Spider-Man)
Mark Christopher Lawrence (Halloween II)
Alan Cumming (Tin Man)
Debra Messing (Along Came Polly)
Richard Kind (Gotham)
Debra Jo Rupp (That 70s Show)
Garfield (voiced by Bill Murray) is a happy, fat, and lazy orange cat who lives with his owner and friend, Jon Arbuckle (Breckin Meyer) in a cul-de-sac in Muncie, Indiana. Garfield passes his time by annoying Jon and mocking a neighbor Doberman Pinscher, Luca. Aside from Jon, Garfield maintains an unlikely friendship with a remarkable mouse, Louis. He also interacts with and occasionally hangs out with his fellow neighborhood cats, including Garfield’s rival Nermal and Garfield’s love interest, Arlene (who are both seen as live-action cats).
Meanwhile, a local television host, Happy Chapman, known for his cat “Persnikitty” is introduced as supposedly a happy man. In reality he is allergic to cats, jealous of his bad-tempered brother Walter J. Chapman, a news reporter, and wants to outwit him in success wise by performing on TV show Good Day New York. Jon has made a habit of bringing Garfield to the veterinarian, hoping to woo vet Dr. Liz Wilson. Jon tries to ask her out, but due to a misunderstanding, he is given custody of a stray dog, Odie. Regardless, Jon and Liz begin dating. Garfield is displeased at having to share the house with a dog, of whom Jon grows fond. Odie is brought to a canine talent show, where Liz is a judge. Garfield gets involved in a ruckus there with other animals, which moves Odie to the center of the ring, where he begins dancing to “Hey Mama” by The Black Eyed Peas.
His impromptu performance is a hit. Happy Chapman, who also is a judge of the dog show is impressed with Odie, and offers Jon a television deal for Odie, but Jon declines leaving Happy to apparently be envious of Odie. After Garfield causes a mess inside Jon’s house in a fit of rage, Jon punishes Garfield by making him sleep outside for one night. Odie comes out to comfort Garfield but Garfield, as selfish as he is, reacts by running inside and locking Odie out. Odie runs away, and is picked up by an elderly woman named Mrs. Baker. A distraught Jon works with Liz to search for him, while the neighborhood animals shun Garfield for what he did to Odie. Meanwhile, Chapman and his assistant find a “lost dog” found poster Mrs. Baker created, of Odie and recognizing the lucrative possibilities, claim Odie as Happy’s own.
When Garfield sees Odie on television and hears Chapman announce he and Odie are going to New York City by train for a big performance on Good Day New York, Garfield, realizing his selfishness, vows to intervene. Garfield leaves his house on a rescue mission for Odie. Meanwhile, Jon finds out Garfield is missing and he and Liz set out find him. Garfield is able to finally make it to the tower with the help of his friend Louis but sneaks in the air vents which are being worked on. Seen as a blockage from one of the workers’ scanners of the vents, Garfield is blown by the vent air, hitting random walls and it finally ends when he smacks his face on the last wall. At Chapman’s studio at Telegraph Tower, Garfield finds Odie captive in a room; Chapman enters and secures a shock collar to Odie, which, when activated, releases an electric discharge that forces him to perform tricks.
Chapman heads for the train station, with Garfield in pursuit. However, an animal control officer snags Garfield as a runaway before he can reach Odie. Meanwhile, Jon contacts Mrs. Baker through her poster, and is told Odie’s real owner had already retrieved him. After learning it was Chapman who took Odie, Jon believes Garfield was taken too and he and Liz race to Telegraph Tower and then to the train station, after learning Chapman has left. Garfield is sprung from the pound by Chapman’s abandoned feline star, the boastful Persnikitty who turns out to be actually named as Sir Roland. At the train station, while the P.A. saying that the Texas Eagle is going to Dallas and San Antonio, Texas, Chapman boards the train, with Odie in the luggage car. Garfield arrives only to see the train depart. As the train speeds away from the station, and seeing a child with a toy train engine (probably the Flying Scotsman in a different shape and size) makes Garfield remembers that his train set at home is similar, so he sneaks into the control room and attempts to stop Odie’s train. The tracks get rearranged, leading to an impending train wreck. Garfield hits an emergency control and causes Chapman’s train to return, and Garfield frees Odie and they exit the train. However, Chapman notices them walk out and gives chase. Chapman corners the two, and threatens Odie with the shock collar, but is greeted by Garfield’s friends and animals from the pound, led by Sir Roland. They swarm and attack Chapman, allowing for Odie to escape.
 Chapman gets up to find the shock collar has been placed on his own neck, from which he receives two powerful jolts. Jon and Liz arrive to reclaim the animals and find Chapman off-balance. Jon punches Chapman for stealing his pets (although Odie was the only who was taken), and leaves with Liz and the two animals. Chapman is arrested for his supposed involvement with the trains, as well as for abducting Odie and Wendell gives chase to the cops. Garfield regains the trust of his animal friends. Back at home, Liz kisses Jon, while Garfield seems to have learned about friendship, love and not to envy others. He then shoves Odie off his chair repeatedly, and the film closes with Garfield singing and dancing to James Brown’s “I Got You (I Feel Good)”. He does a split and can’t get it back up without help. As the credits roll over still pictures from the film (in black and white), Garfield is heard in the background asking Odie for ice.
Garfield is still hilariously funny and you’d have to be incredibly sour not to laugh. The special effects are brilliant – not just the CGI Garfield, but the whole facial animation with the other animal characters. The way that Garfield portrays moral developement is also good and I recommend this as a truly delightful family movie.
CAST
Breckin Meyer (Road Trip)
Jennifer Love Hewitt (Ghost Whisperer)
Bill Murray (St. Vincent)
Billy Connolly (The Man Who Sued God)
Ian Abercrombie (Birds of Prey)
Lucy Davis (Shaun of The Dead)
Jane Carr (Austin Powers 2)
Judith Shekoni (Heroes Reborn)
Bob Hoskins (Hook)
Tim Curry (IT)
Jane Leeves (Frasier)
Richard E. Grant (Dracula)
Vinnie Jones (Arrow)
Rhys Ifans (The Amazing Spider-Man)
Jon Arbuckle (played by Breckin Meyer) plans to propose to his girlfriend Dr. Liz Wilson (played by Jennifer Love Hewitt), who is going on a business trip to London. Jon follows her to the United Kingdom as a surprise; After escaping from the kennel, Garfield (voiced by Bill Murray) and Odie sneak into Jon’s luggage and join him on the trip. Garfield and Odie break out of the hotel room, then get lost.
Meanwhile, at Carlyle Castle in the British countryside, the late Lady Eleanor’s will is read. She leaves all of Carlyle Castle to Prince XII (voiced by Tim Curry), her beloved cat who looks just like Garfield. This upsets the Lady’s nephew, Lord Dargis (played by Billy Connolly), who will now only get the grand estate once Prince is out of the picture. Lord Dargis traps Prince in a picnic basket and throws him into the river. Garfield inadvertently switches places with Prince: Jon finds Prince climbing out of a drain and takes him to the hotel, while Prince’s butler Smithee finds Garfield in the street and takes him to Carlyle Castle.
In the grand estate Garfield now calls home, he receives the royal treatment, including a butler and a team of four-legged servants and followers. Garfield teaches his animal friends to make lasagna, while Prince learns to love it at Jon’s place. Lord Dargis sees Garfield and thinks Prince has come back – if the lawyers see Prince/Garfield they will not sign the estate over to Dargis, who secretly wants to destroy the barnyand and evict/kill the animals to build a country spa. Dargis makes many attempts to get rid of Garfield, one involving a violent but dim-witted Rottweiler, Rommel (voiced by Vinnie Jones).
Eventually Garfield and Prince meet each other for the first time (spoofing the Marx brothers’ mirror gag). Jon, with the help of Odie, discovers the mix-up and goes to the castle, which coincidentally Liz is visiting. Garfield and Prince mess with Dargis, whose plan is exposed, and are seen by the lawyers. Dargis threatens everyone if they don’t sign the papers to him, taking Liz hostage. Garfield, Prince, Odie and Jon save the day, Smithee alerts the authorities, and Dargis is arrested. Garfield, who had been trying to stop Jon from proposing to Liz, has a change of heart: He helps Jon in proposing, and she does accept.
Great for a family film night. Billy Connolly is good in this, but Garfield, as he should be, is the star of the show! loved the ‘lasagna moment’ in the restaurant!

REVIEW: ALICE (2009)

CAST

Caterina Scorsone (Grey’s Anatomy)
Andrew-Lee Potts (Primeval)
Matt Frewer (Lawnmower Man 2)
Kathy Bates (Misery)
Philip Winchester (Solomon Kane)
Colm Meaney (Star Trek: DS9)
Tim Curry (IT)
Harry Dean Stanton (The Avengers)
Zak Santiago (Caprica)
Charlotte Sullivan (Smallville)
Alessandro Juliani (Battlestar Galactica)
Teryl Rothery (Stargate SG.1)

Alice Hamilton is a judo sensei living with her mother Carol. Her father disappeared when she was ten, and she has spent much of her life looking for him. She invites her new boyfriend Jack Chase to dinner, but is shocked when he gives her a valuable-looking ring as a gift. Jack abruptly leaves, Alice following only to witness Jack being abducted by several men. A man (the White Rabbit) appears and finds out that Alice is in possession of the ring because he hears the click of the mechanical box that contains the ring opening behind her back. He manages to take the box from her, thinking the ring is still in it, but Alice had already quickly taken it out and resealed the box. The White Rabbit runs away and Alice chases him to find out where they had taken Jack, but falls through a giant looking glass and lands in Wonderland, which has evolved over the past 150 years. The Queen of Hearts rules over Wonderland from the Heart Casino, where people from Alice’s world (“Oysters”) are taken to, sedated and play games in the casino, their positive emotions drained from them and turned into drug-like substances for the people of Wonderland to digest, keeping them under the Queen’s control.

Alice escapes her own capture, with the ring still in her possession. Identified as an “Oyster” by the tattoo she gains, Alice is taken to the Hatter, a member of the resistance seeking to free the Oysters from the Queen’s control. The Hatter takes Alice to ask Dodo to help save Jack, but Dodo refuses, until the Hatter reveals the ring Alice wears, which Dodo recognizes as the Stone of Wonderland, able to open the Looking Glass back to the human world. Alice flees when Dodo tries to kill her, the Hatter accompanying her to the forest where they escape a jabberwock and meet Charlie, a surviving White Knight, who fled a battle years ago where Wonderland’s knights were wiped out by the Queen. The Queen has the White Rabbit executed, and has the Walrus and Carpenter revive Mad March, her favorite assassin to track Alice.

Alice deliberately allows Mad March to capture her, so she can negotiate with the Queen to free Jack in return for the ring, which Alice has hidden. Jack appears, revealed as the Queen’s son and to already be engaged to the Duchess. However, Jack passes Alice her father’s watch, implying he is alive and in Wonderland. Alice is put in the Truth Room, where Tweedledum and Tweedledee interrogate her to learn the ring’s location, but she is freed by the Hatter and Charlie, the trio escaping back to the forests, whilst Jack also escapes. In hopes of aiding the resistance and returning Alice home, Hatter uses his connections to find someone who can bring them to Caterpillar, leader of the resistance, using the ring as leverage. To their surprise, the agent who arrives is Jack, revealing him as an agent of the resistance who had originally stolen the ring as part of a ploy to initiate a coup to overthrow the queen. Trusting him, Alice retrieves the ring, and accompanies Jack to meet Caterpillar, who reveals that Alice’s father is Carpenter, but he has no memory of her. As the Carpenter has been crucial in process for extracting emotions for the Queen, Jack had deliberately approached Alice in hopes that she could help the Carpenter break away from the Queen’s control. Just as the Carpenter shows signs of regaining memories, Mad March and his minions arrive, capturing Alice and Jack whilst Caterpillar escapes.

Reunited with her ring, the Queen decides to send Alice home and execute Jack. The Hatter stages a rescue with Charlie but is captured by Mad March after Charlie loses his courage and flees. Charlie, after feeling guilty for deserting the Hatter, uses the skeletons of the extinct White Knights as a distraction to trick the Hearts into believing they are under attack. After being tortured by Dr. Dum and Dee, Hatter kills Mad March and escapes. Alice escapes again, joining up with the Hatter to snap the Oysters out of their sedations and rally them to escape. Carpenter appears, having regained his memories, but is killed by Walrus. The Oysters’ unpleasant emotions run high, causing the casino to start collapsing. Alice, the Hatter, Jack, the Duchess and the Queen escape but Winston, the loyal King of Hearts willingly perishes knowing his wife never loved him. With her followers no longer listening to or fearing her, the powerless Queen surrenders the Stone of Wonderland to Alice. Alice returns home, learning her experience may have been a dream when she awakens in hospital to find she had been found unconscious an hour after chasing Jack. However, the next day she discovers the “construction worker” who found her was the Hatter. The two share a passionate kiss in front of a looking glass, as Carol stares in shock.

Scorsone makes an excellent modern Alice — intelligent, capable and capable of butt-kicking her way out, but still vulnerable and young (“You don’t remember me!”). Potts makes a quirky, disheveled Hatter, and Frewer rounds out the main trio as a mildly insane White Knight. Winchester and Colm Meaney are also excellent, Tim Curry is brilliant but underused, and Kathy Bates absolutely rules as the casually cruel, petulant Queen. And yes, she does say “off with his head!. lots of action, a touch of romance, and just enough surreality.

REVIEW: THE NET: THE SERIES

MAIN CAST

Brooke Langton (Swingers)
Joseph Bottoms (Blind Date)
Tim Curry (IT)
Eric Szmanda (CSI)

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

William Katt (Carrie)
Kelli Taylor (Nightman)
Mackenzie Gray (Smallville)
Jeff Yagher(V)
Jack Coleman (Heroes)
Lee Garlington (Flashforward)
Jim Byrnes (Highlander: The Series)
Dion Luther (Stargate SG.1)
Louis Ferreira (Stargate Universe)
Kevin McNulty (Elektra)
Peter Bryant (Sanctuary)
Clyde Kusatsu (Alias)
Michael Milhoan (That 70s Show)
Keegan Connor Tracy (Bates Motel)
Jsu Garcia (A Nightmare on Elm Street)
Rachel Hayward (Jingle All The Way 2)
Carmen Moore (Andromeda)
Craig Veroni (Darl Angel)
Steve Bacic (Blade: The Series)
Richard Cox (Bones)
Zach Galligan (Gremlins)
Ken Tremblett (Watchmen)
Ona Grauer (Arrow)
Colin Cunningham (Stargate SG.1)
Lisa Robin Kelly (That 70s Show)
April Telek (The Brotherhood 4)
Bill Dow (The Fly 2)
Gary Jones (Stargate SG.1)
Jeffrey Combs (Gotham)
Richard Ian Cox (Stargate: Atlantis)
Katharine Isabelle (Ginger Snaps)
Brennan Elliott (Flight 93)
Hiro Kanagawa (Heroes Reborn)
Chris Owens (Mutant X)
Bruce Abbott (The Prophecy 2)
Jill Teed (Highlander: The Series)
Sarah Deakins (Andromeda)
Dwayne Johnson (Faster)
Jeremy Renner (The Avengers)
Ryan Robbins (Sanctuary)

Having seen the film The Net starring Sandra Bullock, and thoroughly enjoying it, I decided to check out the spin-off series. Of course, it isn’t Bullock playing the main character, but – naturally – a look-a-like, and to her credit actress Brooke Langton does a fine job. The series is obviously richer in scope than the film, but to begin with at least, sticks to the same storyline: Computer geek Angela Bennett loses her identity and gets framed for murder when baddies hack into the government’s computers and changes her file. Angela then goes on the run and tries to clear her name.Image result for the net (1996) brooke langton

Obviously, such a plot is by no means original and both David Jansen and Harrison Ford have traipsed over similar ground in The Fugitive, but to begin with at least, what we had here was an entertaining serial-thriller that was eminently watchable. Acting is top notch from both Langton and in particular Joseph Bottoms, who plays her nemesis Trelawney. In the first few episodes, Angela has an internet contact named Sorcerer who we know only by voice (played by the brilliant British actor Tim Curry), but when his real identity is revealed in Episode 10, the show changes lanes.untitledThe main story arc is resolved in Epsiode 19 leaving the last 3 episodes as a way of taking the show into a new direction that would of continued into a second series, sadly the show was cancelled after one sason, but at least they managed to resolved the major storyline of the show which many fallen shows dont get a chance too. If you enjoyed the movie(s) then the series is a worthy spin-off and is fun to watch