REVIEW: TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES III

 

CAST

Paige Turco (The Stepfather)
Elias Koteas (Fallen)
Stuart Wilson (Hot Fuzz)
John Aylward (ER)
Sab Shimono (The Simpsons)
Vivian Wu (Highlander: The Series)
Eidan Hanzei (Gamer)
Corey Feldman (The Lost Boys)
Robbie Rist (The Brady Bunch)
Brian Tochi (Space Academy)
Tim Kelleher (Inception)

Image result for teenage mutant ninja turtles IIIIn feudal Japan 1603 (Late Sengoku period) a young man is being chased by four samurai on horseback. As they go into the woods, a mysterious woman emerges from the underbrush and watches closely. However, the samurai eventually capture and take the youth, revealed to be a prince named Kenshin, with them. In the present, April O’Neil has been shopping at the flea market in preparation for her upcoming vacation. She brings her friends gifts to cheer them up. Michelangelo is given an old lamp (the lampshade of which he wears as an impression of “Elvis Presley in Blue Hawaii”), Donatello is given a broken radio to fix, Leonardo is given a book on swords and Raphael is to receive a fedora, but having stormed off earlier, he is never formally given it. For Splinter, she brings an ancient Japanese scepter. Back in the past, Kenshin is being scolded at by his father, Lord Norinaga, for disgracing their family name, but Kenshin argues that his father’s desire for war is the true disgrace. Their argument is interrupted by Walker, an English trader who has come to supply Norinaga with added manpower and firearms, and Kenshin leaves his father’s presence to brood alone in a temple. There, he finds the same scepter and reads the inscription: “Open Wide the Gates of Time”.
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In the present, April is looking at the scepter and it begins to light up. She is then sent back in time, while Kensin takes her place; each wears what the other did. Upon arrival, April is accused of being a witch, but Walker deduces she has no power and has April put in prison to suffer. Back in the present, Kenshin is highly distressed upon seeing the turtles and calls them “kappa”. After learning from Kenshin of the situation, the turtles decide to go back in time to get April. However, according to Donatello’s calculations; they have to do it within 60 hours, otherwise the scepter’s power will disappear due to the space-time continuum being out of sync. They bring in Casey Jones to watch over the lair and use the scepter to warp through time. When doing so, the turtles are replaced by four of Norinaga’s Honor Guards and are confused at their new surroundings.
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Back in time, the turtles awake on horseback and make a poor show of riding their steeds. During the confusion, Mikey (who is carrying the scepter) ends up riding off alone into the forest and gets ambushed by an unknown assailant. The others go to search for April at Norinaga’s palace, where their identity as Honor Guards allows them cover in their search. After following one of Walker’s thugs into the prison, the turtles rescue April and also free another prisoner named Whit (locked up for trying to start a mutiny against Walker, and who bears a striking resemblance to Casey), but their sloppy escape ends up leaving them all alone in the wilderness and without a clue where to go. Meanwhile, in the present, Kenshin is getting impatient and anticipates a fight from Casey. Casey instead introduces him and the Honor Guards to television hockey, which manages to calm them down for the time being.
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Out in the woods, the turtles, April, and Whit are again attacked, this time by villagers mistaking them for Norinaga’s forces. The attack stops when Mitsu, leader of the rebellion against Lord Norinaga, unmasks Raphael and sees that he looks just like one of her prisoners. The turtles realize that she is talking about Mikey and accompany Mitsu to her village. When they arrive, the village is being burned down by Walker’s men. As the turtles help the villagers save it, Mikey is let out by a pair of clueless soldiers and joins in the fight. Walker is forced to retreat, but the fire continues to burn and has trapped a young boy named Yoshi inside a house. Michelangelo saves Yoshi from the fire, then Leonardo helps him recover by performing CPR.
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As Walker continues bargaining with Lord Norinaga over buying guns in exchange for gold, the turtles spend some time in the village. Donatello decides to have a replica scepter made so they can get back home, while Michaelangelo teaches some of the people about pizza and later tries to console Mitsu about Kenshin, whom she is in love with. Raphael also gets in touch with his sensitive side through the child Yoshi, ironically being the one who teaches Yoshi on how to control his temper. Back in the present, the Honor Guards from the past are quickly adjusting to life in the 20th Century, and Casey decides to challenge them to a hockey game. To Casey’s dismay, the Honor Guards think hockey is about beating up each other. Meanwhile, Kenshin and Splinter show fear that the ninja turtles will not return home in time before their sixty hours are up.
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In the past, the replica scepter is completed, but an argument between Michelangelo and Raphael ends up breaking it. To make matters worse, Mitsu informs them that Lord Norinaga has agreed to purchase Walker’s guns and will attack the village in the morning. When Raphael sneaks off to visit Yoshi, however, he is surprised to find the original scepter in the child’s possession. The turtles are overjoyed to see it but are angry at Mitsu for hiding it and essentially forcing them to fight her war, however, Mitsu’s grandfather clarifies that it was his idea to have the turtles fight in her place.
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Suddenly, Whit betrays everybody and captures Mitsu, and the turtles return to Norinaga’s palace to save her. After rescuing her, they are cornered by Norinaga and are made to fight waves of his soldiers. The turtles respond by freeing the prisoners in the palace, starting an all-out war on the palace grounds. After a while of fighting, Leo defeats Lord Norinaga in a heated sword duel, comedically finishing him by cutting his hair and then trapping him inside of a bell. Deciding to cut his losses, Walker takes the scepter and tries to escape to his boat. When cornered by the turtles at the dock, Walker throws the scepter into the air as a distraction. The turtles catch the scepter, while Whit launches a catapult at Walker and knocks him off the dock to his death.
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The turtles are now ready to return to their own time, but Mikey says he’d rather stay (in particular because he wanted to be with Mitsu). Raphael decides he wants to stay as well because he feels like the Turtles are appreciated in Japan unlike back home. The other turtles and April try to convince them otherwise until Kenshin activates the scepter and makes the decision harder. After a long debate (which included Mitsu telling Mikey to keep his promise about Kenshin returning to the past), Michelangelo reluctantly agrees to go home with his brothers, but just barely misses grabbing the scepter in time. The Honor Guards switch back with the Turtles (all except for Michelangelo). Fortunately, the last remaining Honor Guard activates the scepter and swaps places with Mikey just before the scepter burns out. In the past, Norinaga admits surrender to Mitsu and Kenshin, and the two lovers share a tender reunion. Michaelangelo, meanwhile, is depressed over the thought of growing up, but Splinter cheers him up by performing the “lampshade Elvis” impression, and the rest of the turtles join in with a final dance number.Image result for teenage mutant ninja turtles IIIThe Third film is hated among fans, however I personally love it, the time travel element was well made, the Japanese setting was beautiful. Each turtle character had something to do throughout the film plus its always good to see the return of Casey Jones from the first film.

REVIEW: TWO AND A HALF MEN – SEASON 4

Starring

Charlie Sheen (Hot Shots)
Jon Cryer (Supergirl)
Angus T. Jones (Bringing Down The House)
Marin Hinkle (Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle)
Conchata Ferrell (Krampus)
April Bowlby (Doom Patrol)
Holland Taylor (D.E.B.S.)

TWO AND A HALF MEN

Recurring / Notable Guest Cast

Melanie Lynskey (Heavenly Creatures)
Sandra McCoy (Power Rangers Wild Force)
Steven Tyler (Be Cool)
Brian Patrick Wade (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.)
Ryan Stiles (Hot Shots)
Katherine LaNasa (The Campaign)
Sara Rue (American Housewife)
Julianne Grossman (Star Trek: Discovery)
Jane Lynch (Glee)
J.D. Walsh (The Amazing Spider-Man 2)
Rachel Cannon (Fresh of The Boat)
Danielle Bisutti (Cult of Chucky)
Susan Sullivan (Castle)
Jessica Collins (Tru Calling)
Sab Shimono (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III)
Brooke Shields (The Blue Lagoon)
Allison Janney (Mom)
Rebecca McFarland (Scream 2)
Brooke D’Orsay (Royal Pains)
Morgan Fairchild (The Seduction)
Kris Iyer (Buffy: TVS)
Lamont Thompson (Evan Almighty)
Lee Garlington (Cobra)
Judy Greer (Jurassic World)
Tammy Lauren (Wishmaster)
Kay Panabaker (Fame)
Joel Murray (Mad Men)
Andrea Savage (Izombie)
Enrique Iglesias (Once Upon A Time In Mexico)
Robert Wagner (Austin Powers)

TWO AND A HALF MENAt the end of season three, Charlie and Alan were headed away from bachelor life. Charlie and girlfriend Mia were getting close to tying the knot. However, when it became clear that Charlie would have to give up Alan and Jake for marriage, he picked family. Despite the fact Alan married his young, ditzy girlfriend Kandi, won five hundred thousand dollars, and bought a condo. Four months later, season four begins and life quickly gets back to normal. Kandi kicks Alan out and files for divorce. He is broke and goes back to Charlie. Since losing Mia, Charlie spent his time partying, boozing, and chasing women. Now, Charlie, Alan, and Jake get reacquainted and there are some solid laughs.MV5BOTY3ODQ2MDUxNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwNjE3Nzg3MjE@._V1_After the guys settle back into bachelor life, there are a couple major season developments. The first development is Alan’s divorce. The early season episodes deal with his financial situation getting worse and worse. Alan loses his condo, his dog, his pride, and pays two alimonies after Judith gives Kandi her divorce lawyer. The flipside to this story is Judith and Herb’s relationship. They get engaged and Alan and Charlie do everything they can to get them hitched. Alan’s romantic life is also a big development. Some of his love interests include Berta’s daughter Naomi and guest stars Brooke Shields and Allison Janney.MV5BMTY5NTA5MzMyMV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMzExNDc3MjE@._V1_Life for Charlie is busy as usual. He spends most of his time chasing after women, drinking, and working very little. “Apologies For the Frivolity” is a fantastic episode. Charlie dates a woman who has uncanny similarities to Evelyn. Everyone sees it but Charlie. In the episodes “Smooth As A Ken Doll” and “Aunt Myra Doesn’t Pee A Lot”, Charlie and Herb’s sister Myra hit it off. As the relationship gets intimate, Alan fears how it will affect Judith and Herb. Charlie worries because he thinks he has true feelings for Myra. Everyone is in for a surprise in this highly comical, yet ironic storyline. “Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous” is another solid episode, where Charlie’s sexuality comes into question, as does Alan’s. Charlie has many other fun interludes, but these ones are among the best.MV5BMTg2NzQxNzUzMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMDMyNDg3MjE@._V1_As for Evelyn, there are a couple great episodes involving her and her overzealous sons. In “The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress”, Charlie goes surfing with a beautiful beach babe. The catch is that he does not know how to surf. He gets in an accident, which leaves him with a slight concussion. Just as Charlie’s life flashed before his eyes, he saw his father, who told him to take care of mother. Charlie teams with Alan to treat their mother better. “I Merely Slept With a Commie” is another fun episode with Evelyn. She makes Charlie and Alan jealous by getting a new family. Overall, season four continues the enjoyable and hilarious comedy found in past seasons.

REVIEW: TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES (2012) – SEASON 3

Untitled

MAIN CAST (VOICES)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Sean Astin (Cabin Fever 3)
Greg Cipes (Teen Titans)
Rob Paulsen (Lego Batman)
Mae Whitman (Independence Day)
Hoon Lee (Banshee)
Nolan North (Pretty Little Liars)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
Josh Peck (Red Dawn)
Kelly Hu (The Vampire Diaries)
NOTABLE / RECURRING GUESTS
Scott Menville (Teen Titans)
Diedrich Bader (Batman: The Brave and The Bold)
Jesse Ventura (Predator)
Renae Jacobs (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 80s)
Jon Heder (Blades of Glory)
Maurice LaMarche (Futurama)
Robert Englund (Nightmare on Elm Street)
John Kassir (Tales From The Crypt)
Bill Moseley (The Devil’s Rejects)
Steve Blum (Wolverine and The X-Men)
Eric Bauza (Ultimate Spider-Man)
Clancy Brown (Hiughlander)
Christian Lanz (Batman: Assault on Arkham)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enterprise)
J.B. Smoove (Date Night)
Fred Tatasciore (Hulk Vs)
Gilbert Gottfried (Superman: TAS)
Robert Forster (Jackie B rown)
Peter Lurie (The Crow)
Kari Wahlgren (Bolt)
Corey Feldman (Puppet Master vs Demonic Toys)
Tom Kenny (Spongebob)
Robbie Rist (The Brady Bunch)
Ashley Johnson (Dollhouse)
Graham McTavish (The Hobbit)
Minae Noji (Bitch Slap)
Sab Shimono (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3)
Lance Henriksen (Hellraiser 6)
Michael Dorn (Ted 2)
The group takes refuge at the O’Neil family’s summer home in Northampton, Massachusetts in order to recuperate from their loss at the hands of the Kraang and the Foot Clan. Leonardo takes an extended amount of time to recover, but guided by an apparition of Splinter, is able to overcome his physical and mental wounds. They eventually return to New York with the goal of finding Splinter, Karai, Kirby, and their other missing allies and liberate the city from the Kraang. They are successful in finding Splinter and set up a temporary base in the abandoned Antonio’s Pizza, and Donatello begins work on new samples of retro-mutagen as the search for Kirby and Karai continues.
Meanwhile, Shredder mutates Russian arms dealer Ivan Steranko and his only known disciple, high-tech master thief Anton Zeck, into Bebop and Rocksteady for stealing his helmet, the Kuro Kabuto, and hunting Karai in exchange for a safe departure from the Kraang-invaded city before sending them to find her again. The duo succeed behind the turtles’s backs and Shredder promises to cure her of her misery. The turtles, on the other hand, run into the a recently founded mutant team called the Mighty Mutanimals (consisting of mutant allies that they made during the last two seasons, such as Slash, Leatherhead, Pigeon Pete and former British neurochemist Dr. Tyler Rockwell) who are backed by their human ally Jack J. Kurtzman. Together, they manage to banish the Kraang back to Dimension X and free New York, but the effect of the invasion eventually earns Shredder cemented control of the city’s criminal underworld for his efforts to create a mind-control serum meant for the turtles, Mutanimals and Karai.
The turtles are later offered by future time sorceress Renet to time travel to the past, where they meet up with a younger Hamato Yoshi and Oroku Saki, as well as Yoshi’s late wife and Karai’s mother, Teng Shen. During the battle between Yoshi and Saki inside the burning Hamato Clan dojo, Shen is accidentally killed by Saki, who meant to kill Yoshi instead. Saki leaves the dojo after his hair burns off from the fire and kidnaps Yoshi and Shen’s baby daughter Miwa, vowing to raise her as Karai and leaving Yoshi to die. After his escape, the turtles save Yoshi, as they were “always destined to” before traveling back to the present with Renet.
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When the Kraang return to Earth, the Turtles discover that the Kraang have another enemy from Dimension X in the form of the Triceraton Empire. Despite their best efforts and Shredder violating the Foot Clan’s temporary truce with the Turtles by stabbing Splinter during the fight, the ruthless Triceratons activate the Heart of Darkness, a black hole-creating machine which annihilates both the Kraang, the Earth, and everyone on it. But just as it comes to the worst for the Turtles, April, and Casey, they are rescued by a friendly robot by the name of Professor Honeycutt (aka the Fugitoid) who uses a spacecraft to take the Turtles, April and Casey to a journey into space
All I can say is wow, I’ve enjoyed every release in the nick turtles series, it keeps getting better and better

REVIEW: TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES (2012) – SEASON 1

Untitled

MAIN CAST (VOICES)
Sean Astin (Cabin Fever 3)
Jason Biggs (American Pie)
Greg Cipes (Teen Titans)
Rob Paulsen (Lego Batman)
Mae Whitman (Independence Day)
Hoon Lee (Banshee)
Nolan North (Pretty Little Liars)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
NOTABLE / RECURRING GUESTS
Keith Silverstein (Tron Uprising)
Danny Jacobs (Madagascar 2)
Lewis Black (The Big Bang Theory)
Clancy Brown (Highlander)
Christian Lanz (Batman: Assault on Arkham)
Scott Menville (Teen Titans)
Ben Cross (First Knight)
Jeffrey Combs (Batman: The Animated Series)
Frank Welker (Transformers)
Sab Shimono (Waterworld)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enterprise)
Peter Lurie (The Crow)
Kari Wahlgren (Bolt)
Kelly Hu (The Vampire Diaries)
Roger Craig Smith (Wreck-It Ralph)
Fred Tatasciore (Hulk vs)
Roseanne Barr (Roseanne)
Ninjutsu master Hamato Yoshi (Splinter) is carrying his four pet turtles through the streets of Manhattan when he encounters members of an alien race called the Kraang. During an altercation with these aliens, Yoshi and the turtles are exposed to the Kraang’s chemical, called mutagen, which causes organic beings to undergo major physical transformations. Yoshi takes on characteristics of a brown rat and the turtles take on human characteristics. Yoshi retreats to the New York City sewers where he raises the four turtles as his sons and imparts to them his knowledge of ninjutsu.
Now teenagers, the turtles (Leonardo, Raphael, Donatello and Michelangelo) venture to the surface for the first time and learn that the Kraang are using the mutagen as part of their plan to take over New York City. They befriend the teenage April O’Neil after she and her psychologist father Kirby are abducted by the Kraang. Donatello, who has developed a crush on April, is able to rescue her and while Kirby remains a prisoner of the Kraang, she becomes an ally of the turtles, who try to help her locate her father. April is also trained by Splinter to be a kunoichi, a female ninja.
After learning of Splinter’s and the turtles’s presence in New York, Splinter’s adoptive brother and long-time enemy Oroku Saki (Shredder) travels there from Japan and orders his birth clan, the Foot to track down Splinter and his sons, and put an end to their clan. This family feud eventually earns the coincidence of two of Shredder’s disciples, martial arts star Chris Bradford and Brazilian street thug Xever Montes, getting mutated into Dogpound (later Rahzar) and Fishface. Learning about the Kraang’s presence through his adopted daughter Karai, Shredder enters an alliance with the aliens to destroy their mutual enemies in the Hamato Clan.
The turtles later discover that the Kraang came to Earth from Dimension X and built their headquarters with a company called T.C.R.I and are plotting to use the mutagen and a set of Kraang-like powers that April was born with to convert Earth into a planet suitable for their race. After the turtles rescue Kirby, the Kraang invade New York, but the turtles and April emerge triumphant when they send the Technodrome, the Kraang leader Kraang Prime’s ship, crashing into the sea. Meanwhile, Splinter battles Shredder and learns that Karai is his own daughter, Hamato Miwa, who was kidnapped by Shredder and who believes that Splinter killed her mother. The season ends with turtles celebrating their victory over the Kraang as Splinter hides the secret of Miwa from them.
I am not ashamed to say that I bought these DVD’s for me! I am a huge TMNT fan and I adore this show. This is excellent value, all 26 episodes are here spread over 4 volumes.The animation and voice acting are superb and the writing is brilliant. Lots of comedy moments and references to the 1980s cartoon series. There’s also a darker edge to this series, so fans of all ages can enjoy.

REVIEW: THE SHADOW (1994)

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CAST
Alec Baldwin (Beetlejuice)
John Lone (Rush Hour 2)
Penelope Anne Miller (Kindergarten Cop)
Peter Boyle (Dr. Dolittle)
Ian McKellan (The Hobbit)
Tim Curry (IT)
Sab Shimono (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III)
James Hong (Blade Runner)
Ethan Phillips (Bad Santa)
Abraham Benrubi (Parker Lewis Can’t Lose)
Steve Hytner (Roswell)
Frank Welker (The Simpsons)
Robert Trebor (Hercules: TLJ)
Max Wright (Alf)
Larry Hankin (Breaking Bad)
In Tibet, following the First World War, an American named Lamont Cranston (Alec Baldwin), succumbing to his darker instincts during the war, has set himself up as a brutal warlord and opium kingpin under the alias of Ying-Ko (Mandarin Chinese for “Dark Eagle”).[2] He is abducted from his palace by servants of the Tulku (Barry Dennen), a holy man who exhibits otherworldly powers and knows Cranston’s identity. He informs Cranston that he is to become a force for good. Cranston objects but is silenced by the Phurba (Frank Welker), a mystical sentient flying dagger that assaults Cranston, wounding him. Cranston is unable to refuse and remains under the tutelage of the Tulku for seven years. He learns to “cloud men’s minds,” a form of mystical, psychic hypnosis that allows him to influence others’ thoughts and bend their perceptions so he cannot be seen, except for his shadow (since light itself cannot be deceived), hence his new alias.
Cranston returns to New York and resumes his previous life. No one is aware of his past in the East; he is seen as a shallow and opulent playboy. He operates as The Shadow, a vigilante who terrorizes the underworld. Citizens who are saved by The Shadow are recruited to be his agents, providing him with informants and specialists. The existence of The Shadow is regarded by the public as nothing more than an urban legend. But The Shadow’s secret is endangered when Cranston meets Margo Lane (Penelope Ann Miller), an eccentric socialite who is a natural telepath. He is intrigued, but unable to continue seeing her as he cannot keep his thoughts from her.
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Cranston is challenged by Shiwan Khan (John Lone), another student of the Tulku who possesses even sharper powers, but had successfully resisted redemption and hence had stayed evil. Khan is the last descendant of Genghis Khan and plans to fulfill his ancestor’s goal of world domination. He offers Cranston an alliance, sensing that bloodlust and a thirst for power still exist in his heart, but Cranston refuses. Cranston acquires a rare coin from Khan and learns that it is made of a metal called “bronzium” (an impure form of uranium) that theoretically can generate an explosion large enough to destroy a city. This suspicion is confirmed when he learns that Margo’s father Reinhardt (Ian McKellen), an atomic scientist working for the War Department, has vanished. Shiwan Khan hypnotizes Margo Lane and sends her to assassinate Cranston, hoping that Cranston will be forced to kill her, thus reawakening his darker side. Instead, Cranston breaks Khan’s hold on her, but she is now aware of his secret identity. Cranston prepares to rescue Reinhardt but is thwarted by several of Khan’s henchmen. The Shadow suffers another setback when he confronts Reinhardt’s former assistant, Farley Claymore (Tim Curry), who has joined Khan’s forces. Claymore traps The Shadow in a submersion tank, but Cranston escapes drowning by mentally summoning Margo. The Shadow learns of Khan’s hideout, the luxurious Hotel Monolith, a building in the middle of the city that Shiwan Khan has rendered invisible; it appears to everyone else as an empty lot, but The Shadow can see through Khan’s mental clouding. Knowing that Khan has Reinhardt hostage and the completed atomic bomb in his possession, he infiltrates the hotel for a final showdown.hqdefault
The Shadow fights his way through the hotel, killing Claymore and Khan’s warriors. He faces Khan but is subdued by the Phurba, sustaining multiple injuries until he realizes that only a peaceful mind can truly control the Phurba. Overcoming Khan’s command of the dagger, he launches the Phurba into Khan’s torso. The injury breaks Khan’s concentration, freeing Reinhardt from his hypnotic state and rendering the hotel visible to everyone. The Shadow pursues Khan into the bowels of the building while Margo and Reinhardt disable the atomic bomb. The Shadow defeats Khan by psychically hurling a glass shard into his skull.
Khan awakens in a padded cell, confused as to how he got there. He discovers that his powers are gone. He learns that the doctors saved his life by removing the part of his brain that harbored his psychic abilities. He demands to be set free, but is ignored along with the rants of the other inmates. Unknown to him, the doctor is an agent of The Shadow who has ensured that Khan is no longer a threat.
Now safe from Khan, Cranston gives in to his love for Margo, but duty calls soon after, and he promises to find her later that night. Margo asks how he will know where to find her, and Cranston reassures her, “I’ll know.”
This movie is stunningly produced, with excellent scenes. The characters are interesting, even if not often believable. The action is quite gripping, but is restrained.

REVIEW: SOUTHLAND TALES

CAST

Dwayne Johnson (G.I. Joe: Retaliation)
Seann William Scott (American Pie)
Sarah Michelle Gellar (Ringer)
Mandy Moore (Saved)
Justin Timberlake (The Social Network)
Miranda Richardson (Sleepy Hollow)
Wallace Shawn (The Princess Bride)
Bai Ling (The Breed)
Nora Dunn (Bones)
John Larroquette (Chuck)
Kevin Smith (Dogma)
Holmes Osborne (Donnie Darko)
Cheri Oteri (Scary Movie)
Jon Lovitz (The Simpsons)
Amy Poehler (Mr. Woodcock)
Curtis Armstrong (New Girl)
Beth Grant (Child’s Play 2)
Christopher Lambert (Highlander)
Will Sasso (Happy Gilmore)
Janeane Garofalo (Wet Hot American Summer)
Miranda Richardson (Good Omens)
Zelda Rubinstein (Poltergeist)
Sab Shimono (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III)

On July 4th, 2005, in a fictionalized United States alternate history reality, two towns in Texas: El Paso and Abilene were destroyed by twin nuclear attacks that triggered a catastrophe of unimaginable proportions, sending America into a state of anarchy and hysteria, as well as a Third World War (a fictionalized perspective of what the War on Terror would’ve escalated to). The PATRIOT Act has extended authority to a new agency known as US-IDent, which keeps constant surveillance on citizens—even to the extent of censoring the Internet and requiring fingerprints to access computers and bank accounts. In response to the recent fuel shortage in the wake of global warfare, the German company Treer designs a generator of inexhaustible energy, which is propelled by the perpetual motion of ocean currents, called “Fluid Karma”. However, its inventor Baron von Westphalen and his associates are hiding the fact that the generators alter the ocean’s currents and cause the Earth to slow its rotation, and that the transmission of Fluid Karma to portable receivers (via quantum entanglement) is ripping holes in the fabric of space and time.
In near-future 2008, Los Angeles (referred to as “The Southlands” by locals) is a city on the brink of chaos overshadowed by the growth of the underground neo-Marxist organization. The film follows the criss-crossed destinies of Boxer Santaros (Dwayne Johnson), an action film actor stricken with amnesia; Krysta Now (Sarah Michelle Gellar), a psychic ex-porn star in the midst of creating a reality TV show; and twin brothers Roland and Ronald Taverner (both Seann William Scott), whose destinies become intertwined with that of all mankind. The Taverner twins are revealed to be the same person by the engineers of Treer, duplicated when Roland traveled through a rift in space-time, while Boxer has become the most wanted man in the world despite his political ties and his having the fate of the future, in the form of a prophetic screenplay foretelling the end of the world, in his hands.

Southland Tales is not for everybody and while some may find it pretentious, I personally found it extremely engaging and thought provoking and in my opinion is a misunderstood masterpiece