Kevin Costner (Dances With Wolves)
Gal Gadot (Wonder Woman)
Tommy Lee Jones (Men In Black)
Gary Oldman (The Dark Knight)
Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
Alice Eve (Star Trek Into Darkness)
Michael Pitt (The Village)
Jordi Mollà (Blow)
Antje Traue (Man of Steel)
Scott Adkins (Zero Dark Thirty)
Amaury Nolasco (Max Payne)
Colin Salmon (Limitless TV)
Tommy Hatto (Thor: The Dark World)
Robert Davi (The Bad Pack)
Natalie Burn (Mechanic: Resurrection)

Gal Gadot in Criminal (2016)When Spanish industrialist-turned-anarchist Xavier Heimdahl arranges for his associate Jan Strook—a hacker known as “the Dutchman”—to create a wormhole program that would allow the owner to bypass all computer codes protecting the world’s nuclear defense codes, the Dutchman panics and attempts to hand his secret over to the CIA. He makes contact with London-based agent Bill Pope, but although Pope is able to get the Dutchman to a safe house and recover the money to pay him for his services, he is caught by Heimdahl’s men and tortured to death before he can tell anyone where he hid the Dutchman.Tommy Lee Jones in Criminal (2016)Desperate to find the Dutchman, Pope’s CIA supervisor Quaker Wells contacts Dr. Micah Franks, who has developed a treatment that could theoretically plant the memory patterns of a dead man onto a living one. Keeping Pope’s brain stimulated to preserve its knowledge, Franks requests that convict Jerico Stewart be the subject of the procedure, as Stewart’s criminal behavior is the result of childhood brain trauma leaving him with an underdeveloped frontal lobe, hindering his emotional development and impulse control, that they can use to “graft” Pope’s knowledge into Stewart’s mind.Kevin Costner, Freddy Bosche, and Emmanuel Imani in Criminal (2016)While the process initially appears unsuccessful, Jerico is able to escape custody while being transferred after the operation, faking his death and heading to Pope’s house, where he ties Pope’s wife, Jillian, to her bed and gags her mouth with duct tape, is able to disable the house alarms and delay an investigation of the silent alarm which Jillian manages to activate. As time goes on, he experiences memory flashes of Pope’s past, but all he can determine is that the bag of money was hidden behind a shelf of books relating to George Orwell, without identifying where it or the Dutchman are kept.Ryan Reynolds in Criminal (2016)The CIA becomes increasingly anxious to find the Dutchman when they learn that he is now planning to sell the program to the Russians, believing that the CIA has betrayed him. Fortunately, they are able to find Jerico after he contacts Dr. Franks for medication using Pope’s CIA codes, Franks’s questioning confirming that Jerico is developing emotions as well as drawing on Pope’s experience. As Jerico attempts to retrace the route Pope took to hide the Dutchman, Heimdahl creates a distraction at the airport that draws Quaker’s attention, allowing Heimdahl’s henchwoman Elsa to try and capture Jerico, killing his CIA guards before Jerico escapes by driving off a bridge.Gary Oldman in Criminal (2016)His leg injured in his escape, Jerico retreats to the Pope house, where he encounters Jillian and explains the situation to her. Although initially concerned, Jillian comes to accept Jerico’s story as she sees him interacting with her daughter, Emma, allowing Jerico to stay the night. Jerico forms a bond with the two. The next morning, Jerico realizes through a conversation with Jillian that the bag is hidden in the rare books collection at the University of London where she works. He attempts to retrieve the bag, but he is captured by Heimdahl and Elsa once he has found it. Heimdahl forces him to take them to the Dutchman or he will kill Jillian and Emma.Kevin Costner and Scott Adkins in Criminal (2016)With the CIA and a Russian strike team now seeking the Dutchman, Jerico—who has recalled that Pope hid the Dutchman in Jillian’s office at the university—is able to escape Elsa using an improvised nitro-glycerine bomb, returning to the office to provide a hurried explanation to the Dutchman. The two are caught by Elsa before they can escape, Jerico is shot in the shoulder and after she kills the Dutchman, Jerico knocks her out with a potted cactus before killing her by bashing her head in with a lamp. Taking the flash drive containing the wormhole program to the airfield where Heimdahl is attempting an escape, Jerico is able to save Jillian and Emma despite Quaker’s protests about the danger Heimdahl could pose with the program. As Heimdahl’s plane takes off, Jerico reveals to Quaker that he had the Dutchman reprogram the wormhole so that it would target the source of the next transmission, resulting in Heimdahl unwittingly destroying his own plane when he tries to fire a missile at the airfield. A few months later, Jerico is shown on the beach where Pope and Jillian had their honeymoon, initially unresponsive to anything but automatic reflexes and responses. With all other options exhausted, Quaker and Franks take Jillian and Emma to see him, the sight of Pope’s family confirming that some part of Pope exists in Jerico when he responds with a nose-tap that was Pope and Jillian’s way of saying “I love you” in private. Witnessing this, Quaker reflects that he will offer Jerico a job.Ryan Reynolds in Criminal (2016)More like Face off, just that here it’s not the face but the mind that’s been swapped from a CIA operative to Costner. All I can say is watch this movie at any cost cos Costner delivered what no man can do to such perfection it’s almost impossible to explain.





Denzel Washington (Training Day)
Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
Robert Patrick (Terminator 2)
Vera Farmiga (Bates Motel)
Brendan Gleeson (Troy)
Sam Shepard (Swordfish)
Ruben Blades (Predator 2)
Liam Cunningham (Game of Thrones)
Joel Kinnaman (Robocop 2014)
Stephen Rider (Daredevil)
Tracie Thoms (Cold Case)
Sebastian Roche (The Originals)

In Cape Town, South Africa, ex-CIA NOC operative turned traitor and international criminal Tobin Frost (Denzel Washington) acquires a data storage device from rogue MI6 agent Alec Wade (Liam Cunningham). After the pair is attacked by a team of mercenaries led by Vargas (Fares Fares), Wade is killed and Frost is cornered by the gunmen, leaving him no choice but to surrender to the American consulate.

Frost is transferred to a local safe house maintained by “housekeeper” Matt Weston (Ryan Reynolds), a young agent on his first low-level CIA posting and then the CIA sends in a team led by veteran agent Daniel Kiefer (Robert Patrick) to interrogate Frost and bring him back to the US. Weston watches uneasily as Kiefer and his men waterboard Frost. When the power to the safe house is cut, the CIA team realize that they are in grave danger. Vargas and a heavily armed group attack the safe house, killing Kiefer and his team. Weston escapes, taking Frost as his charge. When Weston makes contact with his superior, David Barlow (Brendan Gleeson), at CIA headquarters in Langley, Virginia, Catherine Linklater (Vera Farmiga), another CIA operative, orders Weston to lie low and await further instructions.

Weston hides out with Frost and calls his girlfriend Ana Moreau (Nora Arnezeder), a French medical resident who does not know that he works for the CIA, and tells her to leave the house. Barlow later tells Weston to go to Cape Town Stadium to retrieve a GPS device with the location of another nearby safe house. He retrieves the GPS at the stadium, but Frost creates a diversion and gets away by disguising himself as a policeman. Weston, detained by the police, escapes but is unable to catch Frost. Weston goes to recapture Frost but Frost ambushes him and aims a gun at him as if to shoot him, but then tells him “I only kill professionals”.

Weston is ordered to visit the nearest American embassy for debriefing. Instead he meets with Ana and reveals that he is a CIA agent. He tells her to return to Paris for her safety. Weston tracks Frost to a shantytown in Langa, where Frost is meeting Nicaraguan national Carlos Villar (Rubén Blades), an old contact and document forger. Vargas and his team attack again, killing Villar along with his wife, but Frost eludes him and his men with Weston’s help. Weston brutally interrogates one of Vargas’ wounded mercenaries, who reveals that Vargas is working for the CIA, which is seeking to retrieve the storage device Frost received from Wade. The device contains Israeli intelligence which contain details of corrupt officials and secret money transfers involving American CIA, British MI6, and other intelligence agencies; Weston recognizes the reference to the Mossad because the CIA accused Frost of selling secrets to them before he became a rogue agent. Weston’s own superiors may be implicated. Weston takes Frost to the new safe house, where Weston keeps the housekeeper, Keller (Joel Kinnaman) at gunpoint, because he no longer knows if he can trust the CIA.

Keller attacks Weston, and after a brutal struggle, Weston breaks Keller’s neck, but he is badly wounded in the fight. Frost leaves Weston, who passes out from his wounds. Meanwhile, Linklater arrives in South Africa with Barlow to collect Frost and Weston from the safe house, but on the way is shot and killed by Barlow, who goes to the safe house and reveals that he is Vargas’ employer. He confirms that the file contains incriminating evidence against him, and encourages Weston to lie about what has happened. Frost returns and kills Vargas and his men but is shot by Barlow. Weston then shoots Barlow in the chest, killing him. Frost gives Weston the file and tells Weston he is better than him before he dies from his injuries.
Image result for SAFE HOUSE 2012Back in the United States, Weston meets with CIA Deputy Director Harlan Whitford (Sam Shepard), who informs Weston that unflattering facts about the CIA must be removed from his report, but that he will be promoted. He asks Weston about the file’s location but Weston denies having been told about it by Frost. Whitford states that whoever has those files will have many enemies. Weston leaves, then leaks the files to the media, incriminating personnel from many intelligence agencies, including Whitford. Later on, Weston sees Ana across a street in Paris, France. She reads a note passed to her from him, looks up at Weston, and they both make eye contact and she smiles before Weston walks away.Image result for SAFE HOUSE 2012Safe House is a great action thriller with non-stop action. This is the first mainstream feature for Daniel Espinosa and he comes forth as promising due to his skillful camera work with the action scenes. One of the most impressive is the rooftop chase at night. The editing is pitch perfect as it allows the audience to feel the danger of the situation from each point of view. This film could have been bleak and predictable if the leads were miscast but Washington and Reynolds’ enigma make the film satisfyingly fun and fresh.



Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
Tara Reid (American Pie)
Tim Matheson (The West Wing)
Kal Penn (How I Met Your Mother)
Teck Holmes (Love Song)
Daniel Cosgrove (Guiding Light)
Deon Richmond (Not Another Teen Movie)
Emily Rutherfurd (Pain & Gain)
Paul Gleason (Die Hard)
Erik Estrada (Chips)
Curtis Armstrong (New Girl)
Chris Owen (The Mist)
Simon Helberg (The Big Bang Theory)
Teresa Hill (Cruel Intentions 2)
Sean Marquette (13 Going on 30)
Tom Everett Scott (Scream: The Series)

Vance “Van” Wilder (Ryan Reynolds) is a confident and cheeky-chappy seventh year senior at Coolidge College. With no ambition to graduate, Van spends his days driving around campus in his customized golf cart, posing nude for figure drawing classes, organizing soirees for his peers and interviewing for a new assistant, whom he eventually finds in the sexually repressed Taj Badalandabad (Kal Penn). Upon learning that his son is still in school, Van’s father (Tim Matheson) decides to sever Van’s financial support. Faced with disenrollment due to unpaid tuition, Van seeks a payment extension from the registrar. After having sex with her, Deloris hands him the paperwork for an extension, which Van realizes he only needed to ask for in the first place.Gwen Pearson, though talented with her journalism for the school paper, they do not generate interest from the student body. Her editor assigns her to get an “unattainable” human interest story on Van Wilder. After a couple of attempts to get money fast, Van is approached by the Lambda Omega Omega fraternity, offering to pay him a thousand dollars to throw them a blowout party and boost their popularity. Overhearing two of the Lambdas expressing their excitement over the party’s success and their satisfaction with Van’s work, Gwen writes a story crediting Van as the host of the party. Though Van hates the article at first, he realizes it can be the “cash cow” he needs to stay in school. Van eventually agrees to sit down with Gwen for the follow-up piece.Gwen’s boyfriend, Richard “Dick” Bagg (Daniel Cosgrove), is a pre-medical student and the president of his fraternity Delta Iota Kappa. As he learns of Gwen’s work with Van and suspects a growing bond between them, he moves to sabotage their prospective romance. Van and Richard exchange escalating pranks until it culminates in Van, Taj and Van’s roommate Hutch (Teck Holmes) replacing the cream filling of a batch of pastries with canine semen taken from Van’s English Bulldog Colossus. Gwen accesses Van’s records from the Admissions & Records office while doing background work on her piece; learning that Van has actively avoided graduating for the past seven semesters. Angry that Gwen dug into such personal details, Van disassociates himself with Gwen and takes a contemplative look at his life. Richard arranges to sabotage Van’s latest party with Jeannie (Emily Rutherfurd), a member of a sister sorority by smuggling underaged children into the party and get them drunk, then call a campus police officer to the scene. As a result, Van is arrested for selling alcohol to minors and faces expulsion from Coolidge. The student body pools its resources to defend Van against the charges before a university panel featuring, among others, Van’s collegiate adversary Professor McDougal (Paul Gleason), Deloris and Richard.While the law club invests time coaching Van to plead innocent to the charges, the rest of the student body works to generate support for Van. Having learnt from his past mistakes and what Gwen has shown him, Van goes off book during the hearing and takes responsibility for the kids at the party. He throws himself at the mercy of the court and asks that rather than expelling him they force him to graduate since he is only 18 units shy of his degree. With Professor McDougal as the swing vote, he surprises everyone by casting the 3-2 vote in favor of Van’s reinstatement, and Van studies for the quickly-approaching finals. In retaliation for Richard’s underhandedness, Gwen spikes Richard’s ritual protein shake with a powerful laxative just prior to him taking the MCAT. Unable to hold out, Richard “dials down the middle” of most his multiple-choice exam sheet and hurriedly exits the exam room. As he rushes to find a bathroom, he is intercepted by one of the doctors from the group meant to interview him for admission to Northwestern Medical School. Unable to hold himself any longer, Richard strips off his pants and has violent diarrhea in the waste basket in the room, to the revulsion and horror of the doctors present.Van utilizes the entire exam period for his last final with Professor McDougal, finishing with a negative attitude. McDougal himself delivers the news to Van, who informs him that he passed. McDougal notes that he had been so hard on him all those years because he believed Van wasn’t living up to his potential. The university celebrates Van’s graduation with a wild party held in Van’s honor. Van’s father appears, admitting he was wrong and expressing his pride in Van’s success. Gwen then arrives, lovingly reuniting with Van.Van Wilder is a simple crude story wrapped with a wonderful central performance by Reynolds. Where this 2001 picture won’t give fans the same satisfaction and buoyancy as American Pie or Euro trip, there is enough crude comedy to reward the target youthful audience for their money.




Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
Samuel L. Jackson (The Avengers)
Gary Oldman (The Dark Knight)
Elodie Yung (Daredevil)
Salma Hayek (Dogma)
Yuri Kolokolnikov (The Envy of Gods)
Joaquim de Almeida (Desperado)
Kirsty Mitchell (Lake Placid 3)
Richard E. Grant (Bram Stoker’s Dracula)
Sam Hazeldine (The Monuments Men)

Private European Union based bodyguard Michael Bryce is hired to protect Takashi Kurosawa, a Japanese arms dealer. All apparently goes well, until Kurosawa is shot in the head through the airplane window. Two years later, Bryce has fallen into disgrace and ekes out a living protecting drug-addicted corporate executives in London. Meanwhile, Vladislav Dukhovich, the ruthless and bloodthirsty dictator of Belarus is put on trial for crimes against humanity at the International Criminal Court. The prosecution is unable to make headway against him, as they are unable to substantiate their allegations with physical evidence and Dukhovich assassinates any witnesses who could do so. The prosecution’s last hope is notorious incarcerated hitman Darius Kincaid, who agrees to testify against Dukhovich in exchange for releasing his wife Sonia from prison.Interpol Assistant Director Jean Foucher assigns Amelia Roussel, an inexperienced agent and Bryce’s ex-girlfriend, to lead the transportation of Kincaid. A squad of Interpol agents composed of French GIPN and British AFO’s from the National Crime Agency begin to escort Kincaid from Manchester to The Hague. However, the convoy is ambushed in Coventry and everyone except Kincaid and Roussel are killed. The two retreat to a safehouse. They realise someone in Interpol must have betrayed them and they need someone from outside they can trust, so Roussel contacts Bryce. Bryce is reluctant to help, as he believes that Roussel was responsible for the death of Kurosawa two years previously, but ultimately agrees to aid them in exchange for the restoration of his reputation. After a brief showdown with Kincaid which reveals that Bryce had multiple conflicts with him in the past, Roussel returns to Interpol to update them on the situation, while Bryce and Kincaid escape an attack by Dukhovich’s men.Foucher approaches Dukhovich, revealing himself to be the traitor, and demands his payment for selling out Kincaid; Dukhovich stabs him in the hand and informs him he will only be paid when Kincaid is dead. Dukhovich’s men track Kincaid’s location through his cellphone and ambush him and Bryce. While they are able to fight them off, their vehicle is destroyed. The two hitchhike to a ferry terminal and take a ferry to Amsterdam, where Sonia is being held. Kincaid escapes from Bryce to send flowers to Sonia, and Bryce tracks him down and kills several more hitmen. Kincaid reveals that he killed Kurosawa two years ago, having been at the airport only by chance after another job. Enraged at the revelation that he has spent two years blaming Roussel for “betraying” him when in reality the client’s death was a sheer fluke, Bryce punches Kincaid and then abandons him.As Bryce bemoans his failures, a group of hitmen attacks Kincaid. Bryce changes his mind and helps Kincaid escape, but is captured. Dukhovich’s men torture him in an attempt to find Kincaid, who tracks Bryce down and rescues him. After settling their differences, the two battle their way to The Hague, arriving just in time for Kincaid to testify. He testifies that Dukhovich tried to hire Kincaid to assassinate a political rival, but in the process Kincaid witnessed the execution of a village, uploading photos of the massacre to a secret FTP site that he provides the court with access to. Dukhovich resorts to his backup plan; to bomb the court, allowing him to steal a gun and attempt to kill Kincaid. Bryce jumps in the way of the bullet and orders Kincaid to stop Dukhovich from escaping. Roussel notices Foucher acting suspiciously during the attack, and deduces he was the traitor.She subdues him with Bryce’s aid. Kincaid pursues Dukhovich to the roof of the building, where he attempts to escape by helicopter. Kincaid destroys the helicopter and corners Dukhovich. Dukhovich attempts to break Kincaid by claiming he will never be able to redeem himself for his sins, but Kincaid laughs it off, declares that Dukhovich should not have shot Bryce, and kicks Dukhovich off the roof to his death. In the aftermath, Bryce is recovered and has rekindled his relationship with Roussel and Sonia is released. Kincaid is rearrested for his previous crimes, but breaks out of HMP Belmarsh so he and Sonia can celebrate their anniversary in the bar in Honduras where they first met. The movie ends with them dancing and then kissing in the midst of all the fighting and chaos taking place at the bar.This is none stop fun entertainment from start to finish. The story line is simplistic and basic but who cares the two protagonist are having so much fun you just can’t help but be brought along for the ride. Never stopped smiling from the beginning till the end.


Ryan Reynolds (Buried)
Morena Baccarin (Gotham)
T.J. Miller (Cloverfield)
Ed Skrein (Game of Thrones)
Karin Soni (Goosebumps)
Stefan Kapicic (tears for Sale)
Michael Benyaer (G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra)
Brianna Hildebrand (First Girl I Loved)
Kyle Cassie (Andromeda)
Gina Carano (Fast & Furious 6)
Stan Lee (Avengers Assemble)
Wade Wilson is a former special forces operative who works as a mercenary in New York City. He meets escort Vanessa Carlysle at a local bar and they become romantically attached. One year later, Wade proposes to marry her and she accepts, but he suddenly collapses. Wade is diagnosed with terminal cancer, and though Vanessa remains by his side, he does not want her to watch him die.
A mysterious recruiter from a secret program approaches Wade, offering an experimental cure for his cancer. He reluctantly decides to leave Vanessa and undergo the procedure. At a laboratory, Wade meets Ajax and Angel Dust, whom he instantly resents. Ajax injects Wade with a serum designed to awaken latent mutant genes, and then subjects him to days of torture to induce stress and trigger the mutation, but without success. Ajax straps Wade into an airtight chamber which raises and lowers the oxygen level to keep Wade constantly on the verge of asphyxiation. Before leaving him over the weekend, Ajax reveals to Wade that their true purpose is to make super-powered slaves to be sold to wealthy customers. While inside the chamber, Wade develops a mutant healing factor that cures his cancer but leaves him severely disfigured with burn-like scars over his entire body as a side effect. He escapes from the chamber and attacks Ajax, but relents when told that his disfigurement can be cured. Ajax subdues Wade, impales him with a piece of rebar and leaves him for dead in the burning laboratory.
Wade survives the ordeal and attempts to return to Vanessa, but is afraid of her suffering because of his appearance, and stays away from her. After consulting his best friend Weasel, Wade decides to hunt down Ajax and cure his disfigurement. He becomes a masked vigilante, takes the alias “Deadpool”, and moves into the home of an elderly blind woman named Blind Al. Following a string of leads, Wade tracks down Ajax to a convoy of cars on an expressway. He kills everyone but Ajax, and demands a cure to his disfigurement. The confrontation is interrupted by the two X-Men members Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead, who have been trying to recruit Wade to join the team. Taking advantage of the distraction, Ajax escapes. Colossus handcuffs his and Wade’s wrists together and drags him away, planning to take him to Professor Xavier back at the X-Mansion. Wade cuts off his hand to escape, and his hand slowly regenerates overnight.
Ajax goes to Weasel’s bar and learns about Vanessa. Weasel calls Wade and tells him Vanessa is in danger. Wade goes to the strip club where she works, but he hesitates before he can face her, allowing Ajax to kidnap her. He and Angel Dust tell Wade to meet them on a decommissioned helicarrier in a scrapyard.
Wade convinces Colossus and Negasonic to help him, and the trio take a cab to the scrapyard. While Colossus and Negasonic battle Angel and several soldiers, Wade fights his way through Ajax’s henchmen, and eventually engages him in a lengthy and violent fight. After Angel defeats Colossus, Negasonic attacks her and accidentally destroys the equipment holding the helicarrier upright. As the helicarrier tips over, Colossus carries Negasonic and Angel to safety, while Wade saves Vanessa. Ajax survives and attacks Wade, but is subdued and reveals there is no cure for Wade’s disfigurement. Wade kills Ajax in response. Vanessa is angered that Wade left her, but still loves him. The two reconcile and kiss.
In a post-credits scene, Wade tells the audience that the film is over and announces a sequel featuring Cable.
Deadpool is great. Ryan Reynolds is mouthy, but never annoying and totally owns the role.  The supporting cast all do their bit, but it’s Deadpool himself all the way. With a sequel already announced this is only the beginning.


Ryan Reynolds (Green Lantern)
Amy Smart (Roas Trip)
Anna Faris (Mom)
Chris Klein (Election)
Chris Marquette (Fanboys)
Fred Ewanuick (The Core)
Julie Hagerty (Airplane)
Barry Flatman (Odyssey 5)
Robin Dunne (Sanctuary)
Ashley Scott (Birds of Prey)
In 1995, Chris Brander (Ryan Reynolds) is an obese, curly-haired high school student with a lisp, braces, and a “gentle giant” demeanor. He attends the graduation party of his best friend, Jamie Palamino (Amy Smart), whom he secretly has a huge romantic crush on. He plans to confess his feelings by writing them in Jamie’s yearbook. When Chris tries to return Jamie’s yearbook, it is taken by her despicable ex-boyfriend, Tim (Ty Olsson). Chris is publicly humiliated when Tim reads his (Chris) confession aloud to the party but is further demoralized when Jamie doesn’t reciprocate his intense and close romantic feelings and affections. After they share a kiss, Tim and the class burst out and humiliate Chris again. Embarrassed, Chris leaves on his bicycle tearfully and vows to leave town and never return in order to achieve greater success than his classmates.
Ten years later, Chris has lost weight, is handsome, lives in Los Angeles, womanizer who has dated supermodels, starlets and socialites and works as a highly successful artists & repertoire rep (record producer) for a record label. Prior to Christmas, Chris’ employer, KC (Stephen Root), asks Chris to accompany an emerging, self-obsessed pop singer named Samantha James (Anna Faris) to Paris to ensure Samantha signs with him, an order to which Chris reluctantly complies. During the trip to Paris, Samantha accidentally sets her private jet on fire resulting in an emergency landing in New Jersey, near Chris’s hometown.
Chris takes Samantha to his mother’s house for a place to spend the night and re-engages with his teenage past, including his unresolved feelings for Jamie. Samantha meets Chris’s mother and 18 year old brother Mike (Christopher Marquette) who, ironically, has a bigger crush on Samantha than she has on Chris. At the local bar, Chris encounters some old classmates, including his best friends who is Clark and his wife Darla who are married and have a kid and a successful dental practice, including Tim, who is now balding, fat and a heavy drinker. Jamie also appears, working as a bartender to support herself through graduate school.
Chris plans to impress and seduce Jamie. He gets Mike to keep Samantha busy which Mike was only too thrilled about. Unfortunately Samantha ended up with a head concussion. Meanwhile a number of unexpected problems, including a growing realization that Jamie’s platonic friendship is important to him, hamper Chris’ plan. Chris bonds with Jamie on several occasions and during a friendly ice skating “day date”, Chris is taken away in an ambulance after being injured in a game of hockey. Jamie is reunited with Dusty Dinkleman (Chris Klein), a paramedic and former high school nerd who was also romantically in love with her. When Chris gets home he finds Samantha attempting to seduce Mike, who was in the process of giving her a backrub, and ends up fighting with them.
That night, in an attempt to rectify his situation, Chris again leaves Samantha in Mike’s hands and takes Jamie to a movie showing of The Notebook, which he could not bring himself to enjoy. Chris’ mother and Dusty join them and Dusty’s sensitivity due to the movie causes Jaime to bond with him instead, much to Chris’ annoyance. Meanwhile, Samantha tries playing a gig at a club, gets booed off the stage and assaults a member of the audience.
The next night, Chris went to Jaime’s for a Christmas party, planning to reveal his feelings for her. But Dusty was already there and winning the guests over with his charm and musician talents, causing Chris to give up. Back at Chris’place, Samantha ambushes Mike and pushes him against the bathroom wall demanding to find out Chris’ location. Following initial resistance, Samantha, fully aware of Mike’s strong feelings towards her, passionately tongue kisses him, resulting in Mike’s immediate disclosure (thinking that Chris and Jamie have made love already, Mike uses the term “lover”). Samantha consequently becomes jealous towards Jamie, believing that the old classmates are in a relationship, and in an angry rage, Samantha destroys Jamie’s family’s Christmas decorations. Embarrassed by Samantha’s actions, Chris returns home but is visited by Jamie there. Jamie reveals that she is not mad at Chris and plans to spend the night with him; but, due to Chris’ continuing lack of assertion, the two end up falling asleep and no romance ensues.
The day after Samantha’s vandalism, Jamie speaks with Darla (Amy Matysio), who is now married to Clark (Fred Ewanuick), about the night before and her fear that Chris’ lack of affection might mean that he doesn’t like her. Jamie admits that whilst the two are “just friends”, she tried to “put herself out there” to Chris, to show Chris that she is interested in a relationship.
Meanwhile, Chris attends Clark’s workplace, a dental surgery, to talk to Clark, revealing to him that “the timing wasn’t right” and that their shared history hinders his willingness to have sex with her. Chris explains that he feels like he is in high school again. Later, Chris and Clark catch Dusty singing to a sexy nurse and then kissing her. Dusty then reveals to Chris and Clark that he only plans to have sex with Jamie, as he wants to humiliate her in the same way that he felt she used to humiliate him. Chris tries to warn Jamie about Dusty during a children’s Christmas pageant, but instead ends up attacking Dusty and ruining the play. Jamie refuses to listen when Chris tries to tell her about the nurse, leaving Chris angry and disappointed with both Jamie and her family. Chris consequently gets drunk and enters the bar where Jamie works, proceeding to blame her for keeping him in the “friend zone”; he also exclaims that Jamie will never amount to anything romantic or meaningful. Jamie punches Chris and he is tossed out of the bar at her request. Upon returning to LA, and proceeding a rather frightening reunion with Samantha (who snuck into Chris’s house to “surprise him”), Chris realizes that Jamie is his one and only official and true love interest and returns to New Jersey hoping to finally be with her. Chris declares his genuinely intense romantic love for Jamie at her house and the two share a romantic kiss outside in view of the neighborhood kids.
Brilliant! Really good movie with a fun storyline and terrific actors. Ryan and Anna really make this movie. Anna is hilarious!!


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Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Big Bad Beetleborgs)
Seth Green (Idle Hands)
Mila Kunis (Ted)
Mike Henry (The Cleveland Show)
Patrick Warburton (Men In Black 2)
Adam West (Batman 60s)
Jennifer Tilly (Bride of Chucky)


Gene Simmons
Paul Stanley
Lois signs Stewie up to star as baby Jesus in a nativity scene at the Quahog Christmas pageant. Stewie plays along in hopes of pleasing Santa, whom he believes is omnipotent and thereby can supply him with plutonium. After Lois repeatedly reminds Peter to donate a present to charity, he mistakenly donates all of the family’s Christmas gifts to a needy kids’ charity. Lois seems unfazed by the mistake, but insists that the entire family shop for new presents at the mall. Peter reluctantly agrees, although he only wants to watch KISS Saves Santa on television; Brian stays behind to keep an eye on the turkey cooking in the oven. While at the mall, Peter finds a pair of barrettes that Meg wanted and ends up chasing down an old lady to a pet fish store called “Age of Aquariums”, where the old lady throws fish food on him so that all the fish jump onto him to feed while the old lady escapes.
Meanwhile at home, an ember shoots onto the family rug from the fireplace. While Brian tries to deal with this crisis, the overcooked turkey begins to burn. Brian finds a fire extinguisher, but to his dismay, it is merely a novelty item filled with plastic snakes, which, upon being released into the fire, promptly explode and make it worse. After using the real fire extinguisher, he slips on the foam from it and the TV falls on top of him. Afterwards the interior of the house is destroyed; Brian escapes, but with his paws burnt hairless. Amazingly, Lois maintains a cheerful attitude, saying that they just need to clean up a bit. However, when Meg tells her that they are out of paper towels, Lois suffers a nervous breakdown and screams at the family about how difficult it is to ensure that Christmas happens without a hitch, then runs from the ruined house on a rampage (Meg then ironically finds some paper towels mere seconds after Lois’ rampage).
Lois storms through town, berating people for their Christmas optimism. When she reaches town square, she climbs the Christmas tree there and grabs the ornamental star on top, bent on destroying it. The rest of the family arrives and Stewie, eager to perform a good deed to earn Santa’s grace, performs an extemporaneous monologue about Jesus and the meaning of Christmas. Lois, watching Stewie, regains her sanity, but Peter, who thinks Lois isn’t getting the message, allows the police to shoot her with a tranquilizer dart, just after she puts the star back on the tree. The next morning at Christmas, the family opens their presents: Stewie gets his plutonium; Peter gets a week’s vacation, a new VCR, and his own copy of Kiss Saves Santa; and Brian gets at what first appears to be a bottle of wine, but actually turns out to be a book. Lois is heavily sedated, sitting limply in a rocking chair and drooling. In the closing scene, the Griffins wish everyone a Merry Christmas (though Lois is still too numb to speak clearly).
The first time we got to see the Griffins celebrate Christmas and its become a classic. loved Stewie’s quote about Jeffrey Hunt. The Kiss saves Santa bits were quite fun too. all in all a great episode to start the holiday season.


Drew Barrymore (Poison Ivy)
David Boreanaz (Bones)
Carrie Fisher (Star Wars)
Bruce McGill (No Ordinary Family)
Ron MacFarlane
Brian takes Stewie to the mall, only to get a rude brush-off from Santa. As a result, Stewie vows to kill Santa for blowing him off and forces Brian to take him to the North Pole. Attempting to trick Stewie, he brings him to a Santa’s Village amusement park. Soon discovering the charade, Stewie threatens to shoot Brian if he does not take him to the real North Pole. Stewie hitches a ride with a trucker and so Brian follows him all the way to Canada. On the way, Stewie accidentally causes a traffic pileup by discharging a flare pistol in the cab of the truck, which catches fire and explodes. Crashing his car in a chain reaction, Brian becomes angry and tells Stewie that Santa does not exist. Stewie becomes frustrated and continues to attempt to hitchhike. The pair then encounter a Canadian who gives them his snowmobile.
Continuing north, they soon run out of gas, but receive help from the Aurora Boreanaz, who instructs them to stay at a nearby cabin. The two survive the night in the cabin and set out on foot the next morning. They finally make it to Santa’s workshop, only to find a dark, gloomy factory in a dreary, polluted, lifeless wasteland, Santa a sickly and somewhat psychopathic old man, the elves horribly inbred and mutated from Santa’s attempt to keep up with the increasing toy demands year after year, and the reindeer carnivorous feral monsters that eat the elves who wandered out into the snow to die of exhaustion. Santa suddenly collapses and is too sick to deliver the presents. Brian and Stewie agree to do it, only to waste time at their first stop and leave, after being discovered by a family, whom they later attack, The reindeer eat each other.
On Christmas morning, everybody wakes up to find no presents under their trees. They turn on the news, which is broadcasting the same story. Brian and Stewie appear on the broadcast and bring the dying Santa out in a wheelchair, explaining that humanity’s greed is killing him and if they don’t shorten their demands to one Christmas present a year, they may have to give up Christmas altogether. Chastened, everyone agrees and, one year later, Santa has recovered, the workshop is once again a lively, colorful Christmassy cottage and the elves and reindeer are all rejuvenated.
Image result for family guy road to the north pole
Road to the North Pole is an amazing feature length exmas special, making it a Road to episode also makes it memorable. the Musical numbers are excellent and well written. The episode also has a heartwarming message come episodes end.


Cleo King (Mik & Molly)
Bruce McGill (No Ordinary Family)
Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
As the Griffins prepare for Christmas by decorating their tree, Meg finds an ornament of the manger and Peter tells the story of Christmas. Joseph (played by Peter) and his friend Robby (played by Brian) spot Mary (played by Lois) in their village. Joseph introduces himself to her. They have many dates, but Joseph is annoyed by Mary’s reluctance to have sex. Mary claims that she is destined for something special. Later, Mary tells Joseph that she has been visited by an angel (played by Bruce) who told her that God has blessed her with his child. Joseph accepts this. Taking a break from the story, Peter and the family call their Aunt Helen to wish her a merry Christmas. The call does not go well and Peter returns to the story.
On the way to Bethlehem on a mule (played by Meg), Joseph is skeptical about the baby. Elsewhere, three wise men (played by Glenn Quagmire, Cleveland Brown, and Joe Swanson) are inspired to travel to Bethlehem themselves. They stop at the palace of King Herod (played by Carter Pewterschmidt) for water, and talk of their plans to see the Messiah. Herod decides to protect his title and win the love of Jodie Foster (a reference to John Hinckley, Jr.) by killing the child. Mary and Joseph arrive at an inn, but the manager (played by Mort Goldman) denies them a room. Mary goes into labor, and the manager offers them space in a stable. Mary ponders what to call the new child. The angel takes her list of possible names to God, who is inspired to name the child “Jesus” after something the angel said.
The wise men, who are following a light in the sky, argue about the nature of the light; they think it might be an airplane. A doctor tells them of an earlier messiah who was not successful. The wise men arrive with their gifts as the savior is born. A drummer boy (played by Chris) joins them. King Herod arrives with his army and demands the child. Jesus (played by Stewie) transforms the manger into a fighter plane and destroys Herod’s troops with it. After Peter finishes his story, a pregnant couple arrives at the door. They explain that their car broke down and they need help, but Peter, thinking that they’re faking, gives them the cold shoulder and threatens to call the police. When they press their request for help, Peter goes to get his baseball bat.
The Family Guy’s retelling of the Jesus Myth. Family Guy makes the myth far more entertaining than other adaptations. Not as good as Road To The North Pole, but then nothing could beat that one.


Tony Sirico (The Sopranos)
The Griffin family goes to Quahog Mall for the annual Christmas Carnival, but they find the festivities have been cancelled, causing Stewie to go on a destructive rampage. Vinny learns that Carter, Lois’s father, canceled the carnival. Peter confronts Carter who tells him that it was cancelled because he hates Christmas. Peter vows to help Carter find his Christmas spirit. Peter tries a fake story letter, making Carter drink egg nog in a hotel room, and having him masturbate, to no effect. When Peter accuses Carter of acting Jewish, Carter reverses his position on the carnival.
Despite being re-established at the Quahog Mall, the Christmas Carnival fails to raise Stewie’s spirits. When the Mall Santa Claus asks Stewie what he wants for Christmas, Stewie realizes he wants Brian back. Vinny pretends to be Brian, acting like an intellectual and a writer, but fails to cheer up Stewie. Trying to raise his spirits, Vinny and Stewie return to the Quahog Mall, where Stewie spots his past self time travelling to purchase a gift. Remembering the time travel occurred prior to Brian’s death, Stewie realizes he can use Past Stewie’s return pad to save Brian. Vinny appeals to Past Stewie’s vanity to obtain his backpack, and brings it to Present Stewie. Stewie says goodbye to Vinny, whom he and the family will no longer have met if Brian lives.
Stewie arrives in the past, saving Brian from being hit by the car. After explaining the situation to Brian, Stewie sends the return pad back to his past self in order to prevent a temporal paradox. Now unable to return and having altered his past, Stewie fades from existence as Brian thanks him for his actions. Unaware of what occurred, Past Stewie comes out of the house and wonders who Brian was talking to.
In the present on Christmas Day, Brian is alive and well. Grateful to him for saving his life, Brian thanks Stewie, who remains oblivious to his averted death, as well as his alternate self’s actions.
One of the most memorable Christmas episodes as it b rings back the beloved character Brian,  making Stewie’s Christmas wish come true.


Ana Gasteyer (Mean Girls)
Lucas Grabeel (Smallville)
Emily Osment (Mom)
On a trip to the Quahog Mall before Christmas, Peter and Lois bump into Jesus and discover that he is still hanging around Quahog due to not being entirely comfortable dealing with his own home life with God. Jesus invites Peter over to his place. However, since it is a depressing bachelor apartment, Peter invites him out with Glenn Quagmire, Cleveland Brown, and Joe Swanson to have a drink. At the Drunken Clam, they start to plan a birthday party and Jesus tells them that he has never had sex: to make his birthday special, they promise to help him lose his virginity. Their attempts to achieve this fail, upsetting Peter. Lois tries to find out what Jesus likes, but her nice manners cause him to want to sleep with her. Approaching Peter about his issue to help him, Peter is shocked but agrees to help when Jesus promises him an expensive massage chair in return for sleeping with Lois. He lets Lois know about Jesus’ interest in her and she reluctantly agrees.
As they head out together, Peter enjoys his chair at the Drunken Clam. During this time, Peter has a fantasy of Lois and Jesus having sex and has second thoughts. These are confirmed when other members of the bar confirm that Jesus is not a virgin, but pulls this annual stunt every Christmas to have sex with people’s wives. Peter tries multiple ways to get to their liaison to stop things. Peter rushes to the room to find that no cheating took place as Lois decided that their marriage was too good. Jesus applauds their “lesson”, making the excuse that he concocted this charade as a tale of resisting temptation, and leaves them to celebrate their Christmas.
On Christmas Day, Rupert gives Stewie a Joni Mitchell CD for Christmas, disappointing him because Stewie had observed Rupert picking out a heart-shaped necklace. As Stewie tearfully listens to “Both Sides, Now” on the CD, he wonders whom the necklace was for, and it is revealed to be for Mayor Adam West.
A great Christmas episode that answers the question as to weather or not Jesus is a Virgin. Seeing Adam West as a crossdresser was quite disturbing thou.