REVIEW: THE CONJURING

 

CAST

Vera Farmiga (Bates Motel)
Patrick Wilson (Watchmen)
Lili Taylor (American Crime)
Ron Livingston (Swingers)
Shanley Caswell (Detention)
Joey King (The Dark Knight Rises)
Mackenzie Foy (Interstellar)
John Brotherton (Fuller House)
Hayley McFarland (Lie To Me)

In 1971, Roger and Carolyn Perron move into a dilapidated farmhouse in Harrisville, Rhode Island with their five daughters Andrea, Nancy, Christine, Cindy, and April. During the first day, their move goes smoothly, though their dog Sadie refuses to enter the house and one of the daughters finds a boarded up entrance to a cellar.
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A few paranormal events happen within the first few nights, including all of the clocks stopping at exactly 3:07 AM and Sadie being found dead in the back yard. One night, while they are both in bed, Christine feels a tugging on her leg, which she first expects to be Nancy, but is a spirit only she can see. She begins to scream and tells her family that the spirit wants the family dead. Carolyn is folding laundry in the night when she hears clapping in the hallway. When she goes to investigate, all the picture frames along the wall fall and shatter on the floor. She goes downstairs following laughter and finds the basement door opening slowly. When she goes inside to investigate, she’s trapped there by the spirit who claps beside her as her matchstick flickers out. At the same moment, Andrea and Cindy are attacked by a spirit on top of the wardrobe.

Carolyn decides to contact noted paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren, who agree to take on the case. The Warrens conduct an initial investigation and conclude that the house may require an exorcism, but they need authorization from the Catholic Church and further evidence before they can proceed. While researching the history of the house, Ed and Lorraine discover that the house once belonged to an accused witch, Bathsheba (a relative of Mary Towne Eastey), who sacrificed her week-old child to the devil and killed herself in 1863 after cursing all who would take her land. The property was once more than 200 acres but has since been divided up into smaller parcels. They find reports of numerous murders and suicides in houses that have since been built upon parcels that were once part of the property.

Ed and Lorraine return to the house to gather evidence to receive authorization for the exorcism, placing cameras and bells around the house. A bell goes off near Cindy after they finish setting up. They catch a glimpse of Cindy sleep walking into Andrea’s room, and from the EVPs coming from the radio, they hear a spirit luring Cindy into the wardrobe, where she reveals a secret passage inside. Lorraine enters the passage and falls through the floorboards into the cellar, where she sees the spirit of a woman whom Bathsheba had long ago possessed and used to kill her child. Another of the Perron children, Nancy, is violently dragged by her hair along the floor by an unseen force.
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The Perron family decides to take refuge at a hotel while Ed and Lorraine take their evidence to the Church to arrange an exorcism. While the Warrens are on their way home, their daughter Judy is attacked in their own home by the spirit of Bathsheba, along with the haunted Annabelle doll from the Warrens’ previous case, though Ed arrives in time to prevent her from being harmed. Carolyn, now possessed by the spirit of Bathsheba, takes two of her daughters, Christine and April, and drives back to the house. Ed, Lorraine, Roger, their two assistants, and a police officer rush to the house where they find Carolyn in the cellar trying to stab Christine with scissors. After subduing Carolyn and tying her to a chair, Ed decides to perform the exorcism himself. Though Carolyn escapes and attempts to kill April, who is hiding under the floorboards, Lorraine is able to temporarily distract the possessed Carolyn from killing her daughter by reminding her of a special memory she shared with her family, allowing Ed to complete the exorcism, saving Carolyn and April and lifting Bathsheba’s curse forever.
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Returning home, Lorraine tells Ed that the priest whom they sought for the exorcism had called back and left a message, saying that he had gained approval from the Catholic Church to perform it. In addition to this, he also has another case for them to investigate on Long Island. When they leave, the music box that April had found opens and plays music as the camera lingers on it. Once it stops, the screen cuts to black.

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Based  on a haunting investigated by real-life paranormal investigators Ed & Lorraine Warren whose body of work also inspired the Amityville Horror. The Conjuring” is an exceptional piece of film that pulls all the right stops to frighten the audience, leaving a lasting impression on your mind as well the recently tired genre of horror.

 

REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – STEWIE GRIFFIN: THE UNTOLD STORY

CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Mike Henry (Ted)
Jennifer Tilly (Curse of Chucky)
Patrick Warburton (Scream 3)
Adam West (60s Batman)
Lori Alan (Wall-E)
Drew Barrymore (Poison Ivy)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enteprise)
Ron Livingston (The Conjuring)
Rachael MacFarlane (American Dad)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
Will Sasso (Movie 43)
Rene Auberjonois (Star Trek: DS9)
Jennie Garth (What I Like About You)
Jason Priestley (Tru Calling)
Tori Spelling (Smallville)
Michael Clarke Duncan (Sin City)
Busy Phipps (Terminator: TSCC)

Image result for family guy stewie griffin the untold storyThe DVD stars with  the premiere of the film, where celebrities such as Drew Barrymore date the Kool-Aid Man, the Greased-Up Deaf Guy, the Evil Monkey, David Bowie, and the Griffins. Everyone goes into the theatre where Channel 5 reveals they have hired Glenn Quagmire to provide them with a bootleg copy of the film. We then see an advertisement for a new movie, People Who Look Like They Never Sleep… starring Susan Sarandon and Vince Vaughn, and another film, The Littlest Bunny. After this, the film begins.

When the Griffins go swimming at the Quahog Community Pool, Peter tries teaching Stewie to swim and attempts to toss him into the pool, despite Stewie begging to be put down. Lois takes Stewie to swimming lessons, where Stewie meets Brad, a child about his age who is the “Star Swimmer.” In jealousy, Stewie does everything he can to steal Brad’s glory. As a last resort he tries to kill him by rigging a lifeguard chair with dynamite and luring Brad beneath it with marzipan; however, Stewie’s detonator malfunctions, blowing up the legs of chair and causing it to fall on Stewie himself. He ends up in hell with Steve Allen. When Stewie is revived by Lois, he believes it is a sign for him to be a good boy.

After Peter learns that the new video store will not let him rent pornography, he vents his frustration in front of newscaster Tom Tucker, who gives him a job at Quahog 5 hosting a segment called “What Really Grinds My Gears,” in which he rants about things that bother him. Peter becomes extremely popular, overshadowing Tucker, who is fired after attempting to distract Peter during filming.

Stewie attempts to be a good boy by smothering Brian with affection. Brian finally goads Stewie into reverting to his old, violent ways by crushing a spider web and eating the spider. Stewie starts drinking heavily, following Brian’s way of coping. Brian attempts to cure Stewie of his alcoholism by taking him out for a night of drinking at the Drunken Clam. While drunk, Stewie crashes Brian’s car through the wall of the bar. Knowing Stewie is Peter’s son, Tom takes advantage of the situation and presents footage of the accident at the news station. Peter is fired and Tom is rehired as the anchor. The next morning, Stewie has a hangover and realizes his lonely existence in the world, wishing that there were someone else to whom he could relate. At the end Stewie says it is good that he stopped drinking now, so that it would not have any repercussions later in life.Peter buys a TiVo. Watching it, Stewie spots a man in San Francisco on the news that has the same face and hairstyle as him. Stewie then believes that he may be his true father. Learning that Quagmire is going on a cross-country tour in which he plans to have sex with a different woman in every state of America, Brian and Stewie hitch a ride in his RV. At a motel in New Jersey, Quagmire is handcuffed to a bed and mugged by the latest woman. Then Stewie and Brian drive off with his RV leaving Quagmire at the motel.
Image result for family guy stewie griffin the untold storyMeanwhile, Peter and Lois are trying to get intimate, but are constantly interrupted by Chris and Meg. To solve this problem, Peter and Lois decide to teach the children how to find dates. After several “lessons”, Peter and Lois send them to the mall. However, Lois is concerned that people will think they’re bad parents simply because they wanted their children out of the way. Stewie crashes the RV in the desert after going insane from ingesting an entire bottle of “West Coast Turnarounds”. After wandering through the desert, Stewie breaks down crying and nearly decides to give up until Brian encourages him to keep going. The two manage to get a rental car and arrive in San Francisco. Stewie mysteriously leaves Brian and confronts the man from TV on a cable car, and is shocked to discover that the man is actually himself from 30 years in the future.
Image result for family guy stewie griffin the untold story“Stu”, as Stewie’s future self is called, tells Stewie that he is on vacation (Stu explains that rather than just simply travel to different places in the world, people from his time travel to other time periods). Stu reveals he cannot tell anyone about his time and leaves for his time, Stewie stows away with him. Stewie learns he will not become ruler of the world but rather “a 35-year-old Parade magazine-reading virgin”. Stu passes off Stewie as a Nicaraguan boy named Pablo to everyone until Stu can send him back to his own time. Stewie learns he will also work at the Quahog Circuit Shack and still lives with Rupert, his childhood teddy bear, in a filthy apartment. Disgusted with the way his life will turn out, Stewie remodels Stu’s apartment and gets him to lose his virginity to his co-worker, Fran (though he spends more time crying than having sex). The next day, Fran tells everyone about the humiliating experience, costing Stu his job for having relations with a co-worker. Returning home, he finds that his apartment is in flames due to the stress-relieving candles Stewie put there.His life now ruined, Stu laments the day of his near-death experience at the community pool, revealing that memories of the experience will re-surface when Stewie is 20 years old, causing him to repress most of his major emotions and preventing him from taking any risks. They visit Lois (who reveals that she had recognized “Pablo” as her “little Stewie” immediately) at a retirement home for a loan and get a new time travel watch. Stewie travels back in time to the day of the accident and prevents himself from getting crushed by the chair. However, future Stewie gets vaporized by present Stewie, thus creating a paradox and skipping the formalities of Future Stewie disappearing eventually. As the family packs up and heads for home, Meg bids farewell to a boy to whom she’s been talking to, considering how much she likes his name: Ron.
Image result for family guy stewie griffin the untold storyAfter the film Tricia Takanawa talks with the fans and asks them how they liked the film, receiving completely negative feedback. After this, Tricia asks the family what they did during the show’s cancellation from Seasons 3 to 4. Peter talks about how he did several part-time jobs which involved wearing costumes, although he always wound up fired because he kept peeing in them because he thought it was like an astronaut suit, but when he finally did become an astronaut, he did not believe he had to pee in the suit and almost died. Brian talks about how he met his fans and competed in the Iditarod Dog Race, only to get very tired and lose. Lois talks about how she became a prostitute and shows video footage of her trying to beat up a policemen and of her having an argument in a convenience store over her wanting to taste the chips. Meg talks about entertaining the U.S. Navy by singing and dressing like Cher for “If I Could Turn Back Time”. However, she was actually repulsing the Navy-men causing them to abandon and sink the ship. Stewie talks about his appearances in those “damn” talk shows. Chris then talks about his guest appearance on The West Wing.91gK+6a7a6L__SL1500_This ‘Untold Story’ focuses on perhaps the most entertaining character in the Griffin household, little baby Stewie. However don’t be expecting light-hearted gags and innocent jokes because this, like the majority of family guy material can sometimes get quite close to the bone and they don’t seem to care who or what they have a go at. Indeed the makers seem to have cranked the level up a bit for this movie