REVIEW: BAD SANTA 2

 

CAST

Billy Bob Thornton (Mr. Woodcock)
Kathy Bates (Misery)
Tony Cox (Date Movie)
Christina Hendricks (Drive)
Brett Kelly (Dead Like Me)
Ryan Hansen (2 Broke Girls)
Jenny Zigrino (Fifty Shades of Black)
Octavia Spencer (Mom)
Mike Starr (Kill The Irishman)
Jeff Skowron  (The Good Shepherd)
Cristina Rosato (Mother)

Set thirteen years after the first film, Willie Soke remains depressed as ever, upset his “happy ending” did not pan out, as he is again addicted to sex and alcohol. As he tries, and fails, to kill himself, he is visited by Thurman “The Kid” Merman, who has just turned 21 and works at a sandwich shop. Unfortunately, Thurman’s father has abandoned him and his grandmother is no longer living – making Willie the closest thing to family he has left. Thurman delivers to Willie a package containing a large sum of cash, and Willie soon finds out it’s from Marcus, his former partner who has been released from jail after the events 13 years earlier. Marcus, expressing sincere remorse for betraying Willie, tells Willie he has an opportunity in Chicago, a deal that can potentially net them millions, though he is unwilling to disclose the name of his contact. Willie reluctantly agrees, while unsuccessfully trying to help Thurman lose his virginity before he leaves for Chicago.Upon their arrival, Willie is annoyed to learn that not only is a target of the con a charity, but that his estranged mother, Sunny, who uses “shit stick” as a term of endearment for Willie, is Marcus’s contact. Willie reluctantly agrees, since Sunny is suffering from early stages of Parkinson’s Disease, though he secretly makes a deal with Marcus to cut Sunny out when the time comes. Forced to don the Santa suit once more, Willie is arrested when he beats up another Santa (after a misunderstanding causes Willie to think the other Santa is a pedophile) but is bailed out by one of the charity’s founders, Diane. Though she wants to fire Willie for his behavior, she relents when he agrees to attend AA meetings with her. Diane’s husband Regent, who also runs the charity and is cheating on Diane with his secretary, orders his head security guard Dorfman to track and follow Willie, becoming suspicious of how much time he’s spending with Diane.Meanwhile, Marcus, after doing recon work, tries to seduce Gina, another security guard so he can obtain the keys to Regent’s office where the charity’s safe is kept but he fails to do so as Gina is high maintenance. Elsewhere, while Willie starts a sexual relationship with Diane, he and Sunny start to bond, especially when they pull a job just between the two of them, robbing a mansion with Willie posing as Santa and Sunny as Mrs. Claus. Bonding over their haul afterward, Sunny gives Willie a gun so he can betray and take revenge on Marcus despite Willie’s insistence that Marcus has changed.Thurman soon arrives in Chicago, having followed Willie to the city. Willie at first considers leaving him at a laundromat but soon takes him to the shelter at the charity. Thurman ends up joining the children’s choir, which is set to have a concert on the night of Willie, Sunny and Marcus’s heist. Willie soon encounters Gina, who, thanks to Sunny’s prodding, believes Willie wants to sleep with her. They end up having sex in the bathroom of a bar, and Willie obtains the keys. On the night of the show/robbery, Willie catches Thurman singing, which makes the kid very happy. As Willie cracks the safe, Marcus is about to betray him again, but they escape just as Regent and Dorfman discover the con. However, Sunny reveals she is betraying them both, telling Willie the bullets in the gun she gave him are blanks before shooting Marcus. She drives and attempts to make a get away at a Santa Con Event. Willie, Regent and Dorfman chases her; despite her blending in, Willie catches her and attempts to take the bag of stolen cash by saying the kids need it more. He then shows her the flier of the Santa Con event proving he was on to her. Sunny threatens to shoot him if he doesn’t let go, but she shoots anyway and the shot is muffled by fireworks, shocking Willie. In the final struggle, Sunny kicks the bag accidentally releasing the money. Enraged, Sunny attempts to shoot him again, but Thurman ends up taking the bullet in his behind while trying to give Willie a hug. Both Sunny and Willie are arrested, but Willie is not charged due to his help in catching Sunny. While he recovers, he is visited in the hospital by Diane who wakes him up with manual pleasure.Willie soon takes a job as a janitor at the charity, where he continues to visit Thurman – finally accepting his father figure role in Thurman’s life. The film ends with Willie visiting an injured Marcus, proceeding to “tea bag” him, as revenge against Marcus for doing the same thing to him.I wasn’t expecting much going off other people’s reviews saying it was not good. This sequel is hilarious I was laughing pretty much the whole movie it’s just as good as the 1st movie. Just as crude and inappropriate definitely worth watching it’s one of the funniest movie I’ve seen this year

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REVIEW: HALLOWEEN II (2009)

CAST

Scout Taylor-Compton (The Core)
Sheri Moon Zombie (The Devil’s Rejects)
Chase Wright Vanek (Dear Lemon Lima)
Brad Dourif (Curse of Chucky)
Malcolm McDowell (Star Trek: Generations)
Caroline Williams (Texas Chaisnsaw Massacre 2)
Tyler Mane (X-Men)
Danielle Harris (Left For Dead)
Richard brake (Batman Begins)
Octavia Spencer (Mom)
Brea Grant (Heroes)
Margot Kidder (Superman)
Richard Riehle (Office Space)
Howard Hesseman (Head of The Class)
Betsy Rue (My Bloody Valentine 3D)
Daniel Roebuck (Lost)
Silas Weir Mitchell (My Name Is Earl)
“Weird Al” Yankovic (Batman vs Robin)
Mark Christopher Lawrence  (Chuck)
Meagen Fay (The Big Bang Theory)
Sean Whalen (Twister)
Sean Marquette (13 Going on 30)

In a flashback, Deborah Myers (Sheri Moon Zombie) visits her son, a young Michael Myers (Chase Wright Vanek), at Smith’s Grove Sanitarium. She gives him a white horse statuette as a gift. Michael says that the horse reminds him of a dream he had of Deborah’s ghost, dressed in all white and leading a horse down the sanitarium halls toward Michael, telling him she was going to bring him home. Fifteen years later, after having shot an adult Michael (Tyler Mane), Laurie Strode (Scout Taylor-Compton) is found wandering around in a state of shock by Sheriff Brackett (Brad Dourif), who takes Laurie to the emergency room. Meanwhile, the paramedics pick up the Sheriff’s daughter and Laurie’s friend Annie (Danielle Harris) and Michael’s psychiatrist Dr. Loomis (Malcolm McDowell), who are still alive after having been attacked by Michael, and take them to the hospital. Presumed dead, Michael’s body is loaded into a separate ambulance. When the driver has a traffic accident, Michael awakens and escapes the ambulance, walking toward a vision of his mother dressed in white and leading a white horse.
Image result for halloween II 2009Michael appears at the hospital, and begins murdering everyone he comes across on his way to Laurie. Trapped in a security outpost at the gate, Laurie watches as Michael tears through the walls with an ax, but just as he tries to kill her, Laurie wakes up from the dream. It is actually one year later and Laurie is now living with the Bracketts. Michael has been missing since last Halloween—still presumed dead—and Laurie has been having recurring nightmares about the event. While Laurie deals with her trauma through therapy, Dr. Loomis has chosen to turn the event into an opportunity to write another book. Meanwhile, Michael has been having visions of Deborah’s ghost and a younger version of himself, who instructs him that with Halloween approaching it is time to bring Laurie home; so he sets off for Haddonfield.
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As Michael travels to Haddonfield, Laurie begins having hallucinations that mirror Michael’s, which involve a ghostly image of Deborah and a young Michael in a clown costume. In addition, her hallucinations also begin to include her acting out Michael’s murders, like envisioning herself taping Annie to a chair and slitting her throat while dressed in a clown outfit—similar to how a young Michael murdered Ronnie White. While Laurie struggles with her dreams, Loomis has been going on tour to promote his new book, only to be greeted with criticism from people who blame him for Michael’s actions and for exploiting the deaths of Michael’s victims. When his book is released, Laurie discovers that she is really Angel Myers, Michael’s long lost sister.Image result for halloween II 2009With the truth out, she decides to go to a party with Mya (Brea Grant) and Harley (Angela Trimbur) to escape how she is feeling. Michael appears at the party and kills Harley, then makes his way over to the Brackett house and stabs Annie repeatedly. When Laurie and Mya arrive they find Annie bloodied and dying. Michael kills Mya and then comes after Laurie, who manages to escape the house. While Laurie manages to flag down a passing motorist, Sheriff Brackett arrives home and finds his daughter dead. Laurie gets into the motorist’s car, but before they can escape Michael kills the driver and flips the car over with Laurie still in it. Michael takes the unconscious Laurie to an abandoned shed he has been camping out in. Laurie awakens to a vision of Deborah, and a young Michael, ordering her to say “I love you, mommy”.
Image result for halloween II 2009The police discover Michael’s location and surround the shed. Loomis arrives and goes into the shed to try to reason Michael into letting Laurie go. Inside, he has to inform Laurie, who believes that the younger Michael is holding her down, that no one is restraining her and that she must maintain her sanity. Just then, Deborah instructs the older Michael that it is time to go home, and Michael grabs Loomis and kills him by slashing his face and stabbing him in the chest. Stepping in front of a window while holding Loomis’s body, Michael is shot twice by Sheriff Brackett and falls into the spikes of some farming equipment. Apparently released from the visions, Laurie walks over and tells Michael she loves him, then stabs him repeatedly in the chest and finally in the face. The shed door opens and Laurie walks out, wearing Michael’s mask. As she pulls the mask off, the scene transitions to Laurie in isolation in a psychiatric ward, grinning as a vision of Deborah dressed in white stands with a white horse at the end of her room.
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All in all i enjoyed it.a stylish slasher movie with some real mean slayings.its what the genre is all about.there is alot of rubbish out there but this is not one of them.captain clegg and the night creatures videos are a bit of fun after the movie.

REVIEW: PERCY JACKSON: SEA OF MONSTERS

CAST

Logan Lerman (Fury)
Alexandra Daddario (Texas Chainsaw)
Douglas Smith (Big Love)
Leven Rambin (The Hunger Games)
Stanley Tucci (Easy A)
Jake Abel (Love & Mercy)
Anthony Head (Buffy: TVS)
Nathan Fillion (Firefly)
Brandon T. Jackson (Fast & Furious)
Octavia Spencer (Mom)
Craig Robinson (Pineapple Express)
Robert Knepper (IZombie)
Ron Perlman (Hellboy)
Robert Maillet (Hercules)
Paloma Kwiatkowski (Bates Motel)
Shohreh Aghdashloo (Flashforward)
Missi Pyle (Gone Girl)
Yvette Nicole Brown (500 Days of Summer)
Derek Mears (Hatchet III)
Alisha Newton (Heartland)

While in Camp Half-Blood, Percy recounts the story of Thalia and her sacrifice. A young Annabeth, Luke, Grover and Thalia are running to Camp Half-Blood while being pursued by monsters. Thalia sacrifices herself to get the others into the camp, and her father Zeus transforms her into a pine tree, creating a magical border around the camp. Soon a Cyclops passes through the border and is revealed to be Tyson, Percy’s half-brother. The camp is later attacked by a Colchis Bull who breaks through the border and ravages Camp Half-Blood. Percy defeats it with the help of Tyson, Annabeth, and Clarisse. Following this, Luke (who had survived his and Percy’s battle in the previous film) appears and confronts Percy, trying to convert him to his cause. When Percy refuses, Luke disappears.The campers realize that Thalia’s tree has been poisoned by Luke and they are vulnerable to attacks. Percy visits the Oracle, who tells him of a prophecy of a half-blood of the eldest gods either saving or destroying Olympus. Chiron tells Percy that he is the only living, human half-blood of the eldest gods, so the half-blood in the Prophecy may refer to him. Annabeth and Grover learn about the Golden Fleece, which has the power to heal anything, and propose a quest in which they retrieve the Fleece and use it to heal Thalia’s tree. Mr. D chooses Clarisse to lead the quest, much to Annabeth’s and Percy’s dismay. Percy convinces Grover and Annabeth to accompany him on the quest, and Tyson joins them. Annabeth hails the Chariot of Damnation, and Percy threatens the three drivers (the Graeae) to tell him of his prophecy, giving him coordinates for the Sea of Monsters (the Bermuda Triangle) before ejecting the group from the cab in Washington D.C. because they lack money.While walking down the street, Grover is kidnapped by Chris Rodriguez and taken to Luke. Percy, Annabeth, and Tyson first locate Luke with the help of Hermes, then ride a Hippokampos to his yacht, the Andromeda. Luke reveals his plan to revive Kronos using the Fleece so Olympus will be destroyed. Percy and they are then locked in the brig, though they later escape when Percy uses his ability to manipulate water. The group is consumed by Charybdis, and they discover Clarisse in the monster’s stomach. Percy and Clarisse work together to escape Charybdis by shooting a hole through its gut, and soon they arrive at Circeland, Polyphemus’s lair. Percy finds Grover, and the five escape Polyphemus, retrieving the fleece and trapping him in his cave. Afterwards, Luke arrives and demands the fleece from Percy, who refuses. Luke shoots a crossbow bolt at Percy, but Tyson takes the bolt in the chest and falls into the water below.Luke begins reviving Kronos and Annabeth encourages Percy to take leadership. The team escapes captivity, and Percy grapples with Luke over the Fleece, like the prophecy said they would, but Luke easily gains the upper hand. Luke is suddenly thrown away by Tyson, revealed to have survived his wound due to the water healing it, as he is Poseidon’s son. Kronos rises from the sarcophagus and consumes Luke and Grover before battling Percy. Percy realizes that Riptide is the “cursed blade” of the prophecy and slices Kronos into pieces imprisoning Kronos in the sarcophagus once again, causing him to regurgitate Grover and Luke, the latter landing in Polyphemus’s Lair. Their victory is short lived as Annabeth is stabbed by the Manticore, who is killed in turn by Clarisse and Grover. Annabeth dies in Percy’s arms but is resurrected by the Fleece. Percy then gives the fleece to Clarisse, and they return to Camp Half-Blood. Clarisse places the fleece on Thalia’s tree. The group returns the next day to find Thalia alive, as the fleece returned her to human form. Percy realizes that Thalia, as a child of Zeus, is another possible child of the prophecy about either preserving or destroying Olympus. The film ends showing the sarcophagus with Kronos’s remains in it glowing, implying that Kronos still has some degree of his power, and is still planning to return.Exciting fantasy film with excellent effects and light hearted banter, great for all ages, sequel to Percy Jackson and the lightening thief.

REVIEW: LEGALLY BLONDE 2

CAST

Reese Witherspoon (Cruel Intentions)
Sally Field (The Amazing Spider-Man)
Bob Newhart (The Big Bang Theory)
Regina King (Ray)
Jennifer Coolidge (2 Broke Girls)
Bruce McGill (Collateral)
Dana Ivey (Two Weeks Notice)
Mary Lynn-Rajskub (24)
Jessica Cauffiel (White Chicks)
Alanna Ubach (Waiting…)
Stanley Anderson (Spider-Man)
Bruce Thomas (Army of Darkness)
Luke Wilson (Old School)
Jack McGee (The Fighter)
Octavia Spencer (Insurgent)
Tane McClure (Go)
Masi Oka (Heroes)

Elle Woods wants her Chihuahua, Bruiser, to reunite with his mother, because she would like Bruiser’s mom to attend Elle and Emmett’s wedding. Elle hires a detective to find Bruiser’s mother, only to discover that the owner of her dog’s mother is C’est Magnifique, a cosmetics company that uses Bruiser’s mother for “testing”. She finds out that her law firm represents the C’est Magnifique Corporation.Elle decides to leave Boston, where she and Bruiser have settled with her fiancé Emmett, and go to Washington, D.C., to work on Bruiser’s Bill. Elle is upset that her dog’s mother is in a make-up testing laboratory, and decides to take it upon herself to be the “voice for those who can’t speak” and to outlaw animal testing.While working for Congresswoman Victoria Rudd, Elle is met with skepticism and other barriers common to Washington politics. Rudd’s member of staff, Timothy, sarcastically calls her “Capitol Barbie”. After a variety of ups and downs including a failed attempt to improve her work environment by having her co-workers write compliments about one another and place them in the “snap cup”, Elle starts to lose her faith in Washington politics.As the story moves along, Elle discovers that Bruiser is actually gay, after she is paged by “The Paws that Refreshes: A Doggy Day Spa”. Bruiser has been affectionate with Leslie, a Rottweiller owned by Congressman Stan Marks, the Chairman of the Committee on Energy and Commerce which has jurisdiction over Bruiser’s Bill. Elle also finds that Congresswoman Libby Hauser, the Ranking Member of the same committee, was a member of Elle’s sorority Delta Nu. As a result, both Marks and Hauser warm to Elle and eventually come to support Bruiser’s Bill.Elle also discovers that Congresswoman Rudd has actually been working against her. Rudd has been doing so in an effort to satisfy the interests of a major campaign donor named “Bob” (who is never seen, but with whom Rudd has several telephone conversations). However, Rudd is eventually blackmailed into supporting Elle’s petition, because Rudd’s Chief of Staff, Grace Rossiter, eavesdrops on a recorded conversation during which Rudd admits to Elle that she has been working against Bruiser’s Bill in order to help Rudd’s sponsors who want to continue with tests on animals. As Grace is appalled that Rudd lied to Elle and blamed it on her, Grace and Elle eventually reach a place of mutual respect, especially after Grace admits she came to Washington D.C. with an enthusiasm not unlike Elle’s, but later lost that idealism when she discovered how dirty politics could really be.With the help of her friends, Elle’s discharge petition is successful, and Bruiser’s Bill is brought to the floor of the House. Bruiser’s mother and the rest of the dogs are released by C’est Magnifique Corporation. Elle and Emmett get married in a park in D.C., albeit not at Fenway Park as they had planned, but standing on the home plate which has been delivered to D.C. by the UPS Guy. In the final scene, Emmett asks Elle whether they want to live in Beverly Hills, Washington D.C., or Boston. As Elle has many legal and political job offers after the successful discharge hearing, she responds, “Oh, I think I know just the place,” and winks as they drive by the White House.Not as good as the original but still a good flick. Still some good laugh and well worth a watch.

 

REVIEW: BIG MOMMA’S HOUSE

CAST

Martin Lawrence (Bad Boys)
Nia Long (Stigmata)
Paul Giamatti (Sideways)
Terrence Howard (Iron Man)
Anthony Anderson (Transformers)
Jascha Washington (Frenemies)
Ella Mitchell (Lord Shango)
Octavia Spencer (Insurgent)
Cedric the Entertainer (A Huanted House)
Aldis Hodge (Red Sands)

The film begins in an illegal underground dog-fighting arena in Korea, where an FBI agent, John Maxwell (Paul Giamatti), has been identified. John is ordered to be killed by a Korean mob boss, but is eventually rescued by his undercover partner and master of disguise, Malcolm Turner (Martin Lawrence). Suddenly, a group of FBI agents storm around the arena.

Meanwhile, a criminal named Lester Vesco (Terrence Howard), who was originally serving a life sentence in prison for murder and armed robbery, escapes from his cell by killing the doctor and stealing his car. The FBI assigns Malcolm and John to capture Lester by sending them to small-town Cartersville, Georgia to stake out the house of a heavyset, elderly African American woman, Hattie Mae Pierce (Ella Mitchell; whom her friends call “Big Momma”), the estranged Southern grandmother of Lester’s ex-girlfriend, Sherry Pierce (Nia Long), who supposedly aided Lester in his original bank robbery by giving him the key to the vault. After Big Momma unexpectedly leaves town to help her ill friend within a couple of weeks, Malcolm and John sneak into her house to plant security cameras and tap the phones. Sherry later calls Big Momma’s house and Malcolm disguises his voice as Big Momma in order to lure Sherry and possibly obtain a confession. The plan works, and Malcolm and John work together on a Big Momma disguise costume before Sherry’s arrival the next day. The next day, Sherry arrives at Big Momma’s house with her 10-year-old son, Trent (Jascha Washington). However, Malcolm’s inexperience with cooking and strange behavior prompt Sherry to believe that Big Momma might have gone senile. Malcolm also has to deal with Big Momma’s lecherous boyfriend, Ben Rawley (Carl Wright), act as midwife for Ritha (Tichina Arnold), who has gone into labor, and attend self-defense classes under Ritha’s older brother and dim-witted security guard, Nolan (Anthony Anderson), whom Malcolm handily defeats and humiliates in front of all the other old women.

After Malcolm almost damages the suit during the night, he tries to sneak back to the safe house where he and John are staying to capture Lester. However, Sherry catches him on the porch, and Malcolm poses as a “handyman” after just barely hiding the suit in a bush. Malcolm and John repair the suit, and when Malcolm leaves town with Sherry, John searches the safe house for any trace of the money Lester had stolen from the bank, but to no avail. Malcolm also bonds with Trent when he defends him against the two older guys who bullied Trent and kicked him off the court so they could play. Malcolm and Trent eventually beat the boys at basketball, amazing Nolan and Trent. Malcolm also begins to bond with Sherry and Trent by accompanying them on a fishing trip. After Malcolm returns to the safe house with John that evening, Nolan bursts in and tries to arrest Malcolm and John for dismembering Big Momma. Malcolm and John identify themselves and reluctantly recruit Nolan to help them out, promising Nolan that Malcolm and John will recommend him for a place in the FBI if he succeeds.

Malcolm, Sherry, and Trent go to church, where the Reverend (Cedric the Entertainer) calls on Malcolm to give his testimony. While posing as Big Momma, Malcolm attempts to influence Sherry and Trent by giving them his testimony about the importance of not keeping secrets. While returning to Big Momma’s house after mass, Malcolm pulls his gun on Big Momma’s surprise birthday party. During the party that evening, the real Big Momma returns home prematurely, whom John tries to stall her. Malcolm accidentally stumbles across the stolen money hidden in Trent’s footlocker. Sherry sees this, and tells Malcolm the real story: Lester had merely been playing her for a fool the whole time. Lester wooed Sherry, stole her keys, and got into the vault during the robbery, which Sherry did not tell anyone about her stolen keys out of fear of getting fired. Malcolm goes off to call for his real name to come help them out. In the bathroom, John quietly tells Nolan that the real Big Momma is back, and Nolan accidentally locks Malcolm out of the house to think that he is the real Big Momma.

Meanwhile, Lester finally arrives in Big Momma’s house, where he successfully tracked Sherry, Trent, and the money. Lester tries to take Sherry and Trent out of the house with him, but as he allows Sherry to say goodbye to the real Big Momma, Nolan spots Lester’s gun and attempts to arrest him. However, he accidentally unloads his own gun which gives Lester the advantage to draw his weapon. Luckily, Malcolm breaks through the window just in time and fights Lester, causing confusion among the partygoers as they see two Big Mommas at once. In the ensuing struggle, Lester shoots John in his right shoulder, and ends up ripping Malcolm’s mask during a fistfight to reveal his identity. Nonetheless, Malcolm eventually subdues Lester, who tries to shoot him from behind and is knock out of the window. Sherry and Trent are heartbroken to realize that Malcolm was just an FBI agent the whole time, and they refuse to speak to him, even when the police arrest Lester and paramedics take John to the hospital for a gunshot wounded in his right arm.

In the epilogue, Malcolm goes to church on Sunday morning to testify Sherry, Trent, and Big Momma. Malcolm delivers his confession and heartfelt speech to Sherry and Trent and admits that he genuinely loves them. Big Momma eventually forgives Malcolm with a big, strong hug, and the crowd cheers as Malcolm and Sherry kiss. Malcolm and Sherry invite Trent over for a group hug and the crowd celebrates as Big Momma and the choir sings “Oh Happy Day” during the film’s closing credits.

An oldie but a goodie. Time less classic fully of belly laughs. Perfect for a wet afternoon

REVIEW: DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS

CAST

Steve Carell (Get Smart)
Paul Rudd (Ant-Man)
Stéphanie Szostak (Iron Man 3)
Jemaine Clement (Men In Black 3)
Lucy Punch (Bad Teacher)
Zach Galifianakis (The Hangover)
Bruce Greenwood (Star Trek)
Ron Livingston (The Conjuring)
Andrea Savage (Izombie)
David Walliams (Little Britain)
Lucy Davenport (If Only)
P. J. Byrne (Be Kind Rewind)
Octavia Spencer (Insurgent)
Jeff Dunham (The Nut Job)
Chris O’Dowd (St. Vincent)
Kristen Schaal (Get Him to The Greek)
Patrick Fischler (Old School)
Alex Borstein (Family Guy)

Tim Conrad is a mid-level financial executive, who comes up with a way to invite wealthy Swiss businessman Martin Mueller to become a client of his firm. Impressed by Tim’s ingenuity, his boss Lance Fender invites him to a “dinner for winners” in which he must find and bring an eccentric person with a special talent; the winner earns a trophy and the executive that brought him or her gets glory. He learns it is more of a “dinner for idiots”, and the partygoers will be mocked. Tim’s girlfriend Julie lands a curator deal for eccentric artist Kieran Vollard and Tim unsuccessfully proposes to her. After learning of the cruel nature of the dinner party, Julie becomes upset and asks him not to attend and he agrees.Tim accidentally hits IRS employee Barry Speck with his car when Barry tries to retrieve a dead mouse in the road. Witnessing Barry’s bizarre behavior, Tim realizes he is the perfect loser for the dinner. Barry shows up at Tim’s apartment and accidentally invites over Darla, who had a one-night stand with Tim years ago and has been stalking him. Barry decides to guard Tim’s apartment from Darla to make up for inviting her. When Julie arrives at his apartment, Barry mistakes her for Darla and sends her away, giving Julie the impression that Tim is cheating on her. Barry calls Vollard and finds the number saved in the phone. While talking to him, he and Tim think they hear Julie in the background and head to Vollard’s apartment. Barry tosses Tim’s keys through Vollard’s apartment window and must break in, only to find Kieran preparing to make love to two girls dressed like animals (neither are Julie) and head back home.Barry opens the door to find Darla waiting outside. Julie calls and asks Tim if he’s having an affair and Darla steals the phone and stuffs it down her pants. While Tim hides in his bedroom, Darla and Barry get into a bar-styled fight, scaring Darla away. Julie left her phone at Tim’s apartment and a voice message from Vollard reveals that Julie is leaving for his ranch. Barry works for the IRS and offers to take Tim to work to find Vollard’s ranch address, where they meet up with Barry’s boss and rival, Therman Murch, who stole Barry’s wife. Tim leaves the next day for his brunch with the Muellers but Barry crashes, with Darla pretending to be Julie. Tim is pushed into asking Darla to marry him by Barry and Julie walks in during. Tim and Barry chase Julie down to Vollard’s ranch, where Tim accidentally offends Barry.To his surprise, Tim found Barry already at Fender’s dinner party. Barry is a hit with the group and is a shoo-in for the trophy, but unexpectedly, Therman arrives, embarrassing Barry with his mind control. Tim then tells Barry everything and, after some encouragement, gets Barry to win with “brain control”, before causing his boss and fellow executives to reveal the truth. A guest reacts badly to the news and causes chaos in the process, with Mueller losing a finger. Tim is fired, as is Julie after Barry makes Vollard realize it would be a problem to have her continue working for him. Tim marries Julie, Barry enters into a relationship with Darla, does some artwork with Vollard, and hosts a monthly “breakfast for champions” for all of the losers. Therman writes a book in the mental hospital and Tim gets a new museum started in Switzerland for Mueller. Fender’s company goes into a big loss and he is named “Wall Street’s Biggest Loser”.This film is hilarious, very very funny. Shows you should never judge a book by its cover. Funny from the very start, and heart warming. Would definitely recommend to any one who loves a laugh

REVIEW: BEING JOHN MALKOVICH

CAST

John Malkovich (Red)
John Cusack (2012)
Cameron Diaz (The Green Hornet)
Catherine Keener (The 40 Year Old Virgin)
Orson Bean (Miracle on 34th Street)
Mary Kay Place (The Big Chill)
Charlie Sheen (Hot Shots)
W. Earl brown (Bates Motel)
Carlos Jacott (Angel)
Willie Garson (Stargate SG.1)
Sean Penn (Gangster Squad)
Ned Bellamy (Terminator: TSCC)
Octavia Spencer (Insurgent)
Brad Pitt (FIght Club)

Craig Schwartz (Cusack) is an unemployed puppeteer in a forlorn marriage with his pet-obsessed wife Lotte (Diaz). Gaining a file clerk job through Dr. Lester (Bean) at LesterCorp, in the strange Floor 7½ low-ceiling offices of the Mertin-Flemmer Building in New York City, he develops an attraction to his coworker Maxine Lund (Keener), who does not return his affections. Craig enters a small door hidden behind a filing cabinet and finds himself in the mind of actor John Malkovich. Craig is able to observe and sense whatever Malkovich does for fifteen minutes before he is ejected and dropped into a ditch near the New Jersey Turnpike. He reveals the portal to Maxine and they let others use it for $200 a turn.Craig tells Lotte, who becomes obsessed with the experience, allowing her to live out her transgender desires. Lotte becomes attracted to Maxine and they begin a sexual relationship via Lotte being inside Malkovich’s head while Maxine has sex with Malkovich. Craig, forsaken by both women, binds and gags Lotte and locks her in a cage, then enters Malkovich’s mind and has sex with Maxine. Craig discovers that he is able to control Malkovich’s actions while in his head, causing the actor to become paranoid. After consulting with his friend Charlie Sheen, Malkovich trails Maxine to the Mertin-Flemmer building, where he tries the portal and is placed in a world where everyone looks like him and can only say “Malkovich”. He is ejected and meets Craig by the turnpike. Malkovich demands that the portal be closed, but Craig refuses.Lotte escapes with the help of the animals in the cage and phones Maxine, revealing that Craig was having sex with her. Maxine is annoyed but accepts it as she enjoyed the experience. Seeking help, Lotte finds Lester, who reveals himself to be Captain Mertin, the creator of LesterCorp. He is aware of the portal and has a room dedicated to Malkovich. Lester explains that the person connected to it becomes “ripe” for occupation on the eve of their 44th birthday. However, after the old host turns 44, the portal moves to its next host, an unborn child. The former allows one to increase their life before moving on to another host while the latter means being trapped within the unborn child. Lester, who has been using the portal to prolong his life, reveals his plan to use Malkovich for himself and several of his friends. Offered the chance to join Lester’s group, Lotte warns him that Craig has control.Craig finds he is able to remain in Malkovich indefinitely. He spends the next eight months in Malkovich’s body, and through his control turns Malkovich into a world-famous puppeteer. Malkovich marries Maxine and learns that she is pregnant as their relationship grows distant. As Malkovich’s 44th birthday approaches, Lester and his friends cut a deal with Maxine and fake her kidnapping. They call up Craig threatening to kill her if Craig does not leave Malkovich. Craig ends the call, causing Lester to think that he called their bluff. Lotte loses hope and attempts to kill Maxine, but they end up at the turnpike after falling through the portal and Malkovich’s shame-ridden subconscious. Maxine reveals that she conceived when Lotte was inside Malkovich’s body and kept the child because it is theirs. The revelation cements their love for each other. Craig calls back Lester thinking Maxine is still in danger. Realizing his opportunity, Lester continues his bluff, convincing Craig to leave Malkovich’s body. Lester and his friends enter the portal, taking control of Malkovich. Craig, discovering that Lotte and Maxine are together again, decides to enter the portal to become Malkovich and regain Maxine. Years later, an aging Malkovich, under the collective mind of Lester and his friends, reveals to Sheen a plan to prolong their lives through Maxine’s daughter Emily, within whom Craig is now permanently trapped after entering the portal, powerless as he watches Maxine and Lotte living happily through Emily’s eyes.

One of the most unique, imaginative movies ever made.