HALLOWEEN OF HORROR REVIEW: EXCISION

CAST
AnnaLynne McCord (Nip/Tuck)
Roger Bart (Hostel – Part II)
Ariel Winter (One Missed Call)
Traci Lords (Blade)
Matthew Gray Gruber (500 Days of Summer)
Jeremy Sumpter (Peter Pan)
Natalie Dreyfuss (The Originals)
John Waters (Seed of Chucky)
Malcolm McDowell (Halloween 2007)
Marlee Martin (My Name is Earl)
Ray Wise (Robocop)
The film depicts the life of a disturbed and delusional high school student, Pauline (AnnaLynne McCord), with aspirations of a career in medicine and the extremes to which she goes to earn the approval of her controlling mother. Pauline has a younger sister named Grace (Ariel Winter) who suffers from cystic fibrosis. Pauline has vivid dreams about herself and others being mutilated with excessive amounts of blood; and after each dream wakes panting in an orgasmic state. Pauline decides to lose her virginity to a boy named Adam – explaining what she wants from him and gives him her number. Because of her fascination with blood she arranges their meeting while she is on her period. While having an orgasm she imagines herself choking Adam and the bed filling with blood. At the end she asks Adam to go down on her, which he obliges. After a few moments he runs to the bathroom disgusted by the blood, as he was unaware she was on her period.
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During sex class, Pauline takes a sample of her blood and puts it under a microscope to check for STDs. Later on she sees Adam on the bleachers with his girlfriend. She tells Adam she doesn’t have any STDs and asks his girlfriend if she has any, who states that she doesn’t. Pauline then tells them that if the girlfriend doesn’t have anything neither will she. After she walks away Adam’s girlfriend deduces that he was unfaithful.
 
Across the street from Pauline and Grace is a teenage girl that jumps rope in her drive way. Pauline invited the girl to jump rope with her, but she found Pauline weird and refused. Grace defends her sister and storms off, pulling Pauline with her. Adam’s now ex-girlfriend and her friend TP Pauline’s house and spray paint ‘cunt’ and ‘whore’ on it. Pauline, on an angry tirade at school, pushes Adam to the ground and slams his ex-girlfriend’s face into her locker, resulting in her being expelled from school.
 
While in her room she overhears her parents saying Grace’s doctor wants her on the lung transplant list. During dinner that night her sister has a severe coughing fit, which concerns her parents. In the morning their mother leaves and the father stays home. Pauline drugs her father with tea and when he falls asleep, ties him up and gags him. Pauline then lures the jump roping girl to the backyard under the false premise that there are several jump ropes she can have that Grace can no longer use because of her lungs. She places a cloth over her mouth and after a brief struggle the girl loses consciousness. Pauline talks to Grace and lovingly strokes her hair, stating that Grace may be confused by what is going to happen but she has only her best interest in mind. She drugs Grace with the same cloth, then cuts and shaves her own hair. Excision-2012-Movie-Scene-1024x576In the garage, Pauline has cut open both girls and continues with her surgery, moving the healthy girl’s lungs into her sister and placing the other lungs on ice, then sewing them both up. Pauline’s mother arrives home and sees her husband tied up. She panics and runs through the house frantically screaming for Grace. She opens the garage door and finds Pauline with the bodies. Pauline explains that it is her first surgery, and although it is messy, it is wonderful, and that she was unsure what to do with the jump roping girl’s body so she used her to practice her incisions. She then urges her mother to take a closer look, who runs towards her and grabs her, holding her and screaming hysterically. Pauline at first seems proud, but then begins to sob.
excision
If you’re in the mood for something which is a very grisly affair, mixed with pretty much every other genre, give this a go. It’s an indie film and it always will be, but everyone gives a good enough performance to elevate it to a cult film.

REVIEW: NEW GIRL – SEASON 1

Starring

Zooey Deschanel (Bridge to Terabithia)
Jake Johnson (Jurrasic World)
Max Greenfield (Veronica Mars)
Damon Wayans, Jr. (Let’s be Cops)
Lamorne Morris (Game Night)
Hannah Simone (Oldboy)

Zooey Deschanel and Hannah Simone in New Girl (2011)

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

Mary Elizabeth Ellis (Santa Clarita Diet)
Gillian Vigman (The Hangover)
Ian Wolterstorff (The Neighbours)
Lauren Dair Owens (Astrid Clover)
Katie Cassidy (Black Christmas)
Natasha Lyonne (American Pie)
Lake Bell (In a World…)
Justin Long (Jeepers Creepers)
Eva Amurri Martino (Saved!)
Michaela Watkins (Casual)
Stephen Amell (Arrow)
Blake Garrett Rosenthal (Mom)
Lizzy Caplan (Cloverfield)
Rachael Harris (Lucifer)
June Diane Raphael (Year One)
Kali Hawk (Bridesmaids)
Clyde Kusatsu (Midway)
Jeff Kober (Buffy: TVS)
Clark Duke (Two and a Half Men)
Ryan Kwanten (True Blood)
Joey King (The Conjuring)
Randall Park (The Interview)
Dermot Mulroney (Young Guns)
Martin Starr (Spider-Man: Homecoming)
Natalie Dreyfuss (The Originals)
Katrina Bowden (Piranha 3DD)
Annalise Basso (Ouija: Orin of Evil)
Rebecca Reid (I Live With Models)
Thomas Lennon (17 Again)

Your desire to watch New Girl is probably predicated by Zooey Deschanel, her cutesy fringe and massive possum eyes but rest assured there is a lot more to this show than that. If you aren’t already a Zooey fan please don’t let the somewhat annoying portmanteau “Adorkable” put you off seeing this great show.In my opinion the first few episodes of the show’s run are a little weak, but as season 1 continues this show goes from strength to strength as the writers seem to be figuring out what works and getting rid of what doesn’t. If you have seen the first few episodes on TV and are not sure if this show is for you I would definitely recommend sticking with it as the characters become less cartoonish and more fleshed out. While there are lots of comedies about people in their 20s and early 30s struggling with quarter-life crises, this show find a fresh approach to these issues that both men and women of this age in particular should enjoy.Zooey Deschanel, Max Greenfield, Jake Johnson, and Ian Wolterstorff in New Girl (2011)There is lots of cringe-inducing humour and the show benefits from a great deal of physical humour and sight-gags as well as nerdy rapid-fire verbal comedy (which is my favourite!). I would definitely recommend getting this show on DVD, as it is incredibly rewatchable. Not only will you quickly come to really enjoy `hanging-out’ with these characters but sometimes the jokes and quips come so quickly you will definitely pick up on jokes you missed during the first watch.Zooey Deschanel, Max Greenfield, and Jake Johnson in New Girl (2011)The actors are all excellent and are perfectly cast in their different roles bringing a real warmth to the relationships between the main characters. Zooey is excellent as Jess and is a really refreshing comic lead. It is great to see a quirky, laid-back female character as so often actresses in sit-coms are relegated to being the nagging girlfriend/wife or to just commenting on the funny situations the male characters get themselves in to. Not only is Jess a witty character but also her lack of tact and weirdness are frequently sources of humour, as are the gaffs of her three roommates. Schmit is the break out character of the show for me. While in the first episode he comes across as an arrogant, shallow meat-head he quickly becomes more nuanced and sensitive and in my opinion is far and away one of the funniest characters on TV.

REVIEW: 2 BROKE GIRLS – SEASON 4

Starring

Kat Dennings (Thor)
Beth Behrs (The Neighbourhood)
Garrett Morris (Ant-Man)
Jonathan Kite (Black Dynamite)
Matthew Moy (No Strings Attached)
Jennifer Coolidge (American Pie)

Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

Kim Kardashian West (Disaster Movie)
Natalie Dreyfuss (The Originals)
Jesse Metcalfe (Dead Rising)
Josie Totah (No Good Nick)
Diane Delano (Popular)
Sammi Hanratty (A Christmas Carol)
Danielle Macdonald (Patti Cakes)
Valerie Harper (Rhoda)
John Brotherton (Fuller House)
Ian Reed Kesler (The Finder)
Patrick Cox (Aquaman)
Sandra Bernhard (One Hell of A Guy)
Austin Falk (Tales of Halloween)
Ilia Volok (Power Rangers Wild Force)
Caroline Rhea (Sabrina: TTW)
Laura Kightlinger (Lucky Louie
Nico Santos (Superstore)

In Season Four Kim Kardashian pays the cupcake shop a visit, Caroline starts using an abandoned bike to make deliveries, but Max is unable to do her share because she cannot ride a bicycle, Max and Caroline rent their apartment via Airbnb to some models in town for the annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, the girls find out two rich high school girls are selling knock-offs of their cupcake T-shirts.

Other Highlights are –

Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

And The Childhood Not Included

When Caroline accidentally loses Han’s expensive fish while cleaning the tank, Max considers selling a sentimental gift she just received from her mother in order to pay for a new one.

 

Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

And The Brand Job

Max and Caroline’s partnership – and friendship – is almost torn apart when Caroline drags Max to a seminar to help brand their cupcake business.

Kat Dennings, Beth Behrs, Lily Aldridge, and Martha Hunt in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

And the Model Apartment

In an attempt to make some extra money, Max and Caroline decide to rent out their apartment on airbnb. Sophie finds new ways to test Oleg’s faithfulness and commitment to their relationship.

And the Past and the Furious

Caroline is shocked when she receives a Lamborghini for her birthday, which her father ordered for her four years ago. Meanwhile, Oleg has something big planned for Sophie.

Kat Dennings, Jean Grae, Beth Behrs, and Sherry Mandujano in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

And the Crime Ring

Max and Caroline are arrested for breaking into a cute guy’s apartment to recover the rings Caroline left behind after she spent the night.

Beth Behrs in And the Zero Tolerance (2015)

And the Zero Tolerance

When Caroline notices the girls’ bank balance is less than zero, she and Max desperately look for ways to make enough money for the payments on their T-shirt loan. Soon after, John (“Big Mary”) from Max’s pastry school comes by to say he’s working as a pastry chef at “The High”, a new upscale restaurant in Manhattan. He encourages Max to apply for the other pastry chef position that needs to be filled, and Caroline tags along to apply for a waitress job.

And the High Hook-Up (2015)

And the High Hook-Up

Joedth finds a hot, young Irish man named Nashit (Austin Falk) on a bench outside The High, and hires him, asking Caroline to train him as a waiter. Max is smitten and vows to get Nashit into bed, but doing so would violate Joedth’s strict “no hook ups among employees” policy. After the two are caught, Han hires Nashit to work as a dishwasher at the diner.

And the Grate Expectations

At Oleg’s bachelor party, Han inadvertently discloses a secret that leads Sophie to cancel the wedding. The girls and Big Mary open up a new branch of The High that, much to their dismay, is located in an airport.

Jennifer Coolidge in 2 Broke Girls (2011)

And the Disappointing Unit

Sophie and Oleg get married, despite some challenges on their wedding day. Disappointing sales at the airport branch of The High put the girls’ future there in doubt. The Girls then end up going to Paris using the tickets they got to get into the airport to kidnap Nash. The episode ends with Max and Caroline drinking champagne from their cabin crew friends.

Another great season, with some great laughs, the show gets better and better every season and am looking forward to season 5.