REVIEW: BLACK SWAN

 

CAST

Natalie Portman (Thor)
Mila Kunis (Ted)
Vincent Cassel (Jason Bourne)
Barbara Hershey (Falling Down)
Winona Ryder (Edward Scissorhands)
Ksenia Solo (Lost Girl)
Kristina Anapau (Cursed)
Janet Montgomery (Wrong Turn 3)
Sebastian Stan (Captain America: The First Avenger)
Toby Hemingway (The Finder)

Nina Sayers (Natalie Portman), is a professional dancer in a New York ballet company. Nina lives in New York City with her overprotective mother, Erica (Barbara Hershey). The company is preparing to open the season with Swan Lake. The director, Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel), is looking for a new principal dancer after forcing Beth Macintyre (Winona Ryder) into retirement. Thomas wants the same ballerina to portray the innocent, fragile White Swan as well as her mysterious, sensual twin, the Black Swan. Nina auditions for the part, performing flawlessly as the White Swan, but she is not able to emulate the characteristics of the Black Swan. Upset, Nina approaches Thomas and asks him to reconsider her as the lead role. Thomas forcibly kisses Nina, and she displays a change of character and bites him, convincing him that she has the ferocity to play the Black Swan. Nina begins to witness strange happenings, and her mother finds scratches on her back.

An intoxicated Beth angrily confronts Thomas and Nina. Nina is worried that she will befall the same eventual fate as Beth, but stays quiet. Thomas tells Nina she needs to give herself to the sensuality of the Black Swan. He tells her to go home and masturbate, which she does. The next day, Nina finds out that Beth was seriously injured in a car accident, and Thomas tells her it was a suicide attempt. Nina realizes Beth will never dance again, and tearfully unpacks her belongings in Beth’s former dressing room.

Thomas tells Nina to watch Lily (Mila Kunis), another dancer in the company, whom he describes as lacking Nina’s flawless technique but possessing an uninhibited quality that Nina has not shown. The relationship between Nina and Lily grows tense. During rehearsal, Thomas kisses Nina passionately, but leaves abruptly and tells her she must seduce him with her dancing. Nina finds unexplained scratches and blood on her body. Nina and her mother have an argument, interrupted by Lily’s unexpected arrival at their apartment. Lily and Nina go for a night out.

At a restaurant that evening, Lily offers Nina a capsule of ecstasy to help her relax. Initially, Nina turns it down, but later accepts a drink with ecstasy powder in it. Nina returns home late with Lily, fights with her mother, barricades herself in her room, and has sex with Lily until the latter seemingly smothers her with a pillow. The next morning, Nina wakes up alone and late for the dress rehearsal. When she arrives at the studio, she finds Lily dancing the Black Swan. After she confronts her, Lily admits she spent the night with a man she met at the club, and Nina realizes the encounter didn’t really happen. Nina’s hallucinations become stronger and more graphically sexual and violent.

Nina trashes the apartment and slams her bedroom door on her mother’s hands, and has hallucinations of becoming freakishly swanlike. Concerned about Nina’s behavior, her mother tries to prevent her from performing on opening night in an effort to keep her daughter safe. An enraged Nina forces her way out of the apartment. Thomas had assigned understudy Lily to take over, but is impressed at Nina’s confidence, and lets her play the Swan Queen. The first act goes well, until Nina is distracted by a hallucination during a lift, causing her partner to drop her. Distraught, she returns to her dressing room and finds Lily there. Lily announces her plans to play the Black Swan. Nina shoves her into a mirror, shattering it. Lily, seemingly dead, awakens, and her face changes shape, now a copy of Nina’s. The doppelganger starts to strangle Nina, who then grabs a shard of glass and stabs her rival in the stomach, apparently killing her. The doppelganger’s face reverts to that of Lily’s. Nina hides the body and returns to the stage.

Sprouting feathers, her arms become black wings as she finally loses herself and is transformed into a black swan. At the end of the act, she receives a standing ovation. Offstage, Thomas and the rest of the cast congratulate her on her stunning performance. Nina takes Thomas by surprise and kisses him. Back in her dressing room before the final act, Nina is congratulated by Lily, revealing that their fight was, again, imaginary. The mirror, however, is still shattered. Nina removes a small shard from her own body and realizes she stabbed herself. Dancing the last scene, in which the White Swan throws herself off a cliff, Nina spots her mother weeping in the audience. As Nina falls backward onto a hidden mattress, the theater erupts in thunderous applause. Thomas and the cast gather to congratulate her—only to find that she is bleeding profusely. As the white ceiling lights envelop her, she whispers, “I felt it. Perfect. It was perfect.”

As well as Portman shining, it is Aronofsky’s direction that makes the film. Akin to the work of Dario Argento, `Black Swan’ mixes ripe drama with horrific imagery. This is not a horror film as such, but does play on the psychology of is characters and you as an audience. `Black Swan’ is a great film.

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REVIEW: ANNIE (2014)

CAST

Quvenzhané Wallis (12 Years a Slave)
Jamie Foxx (Ray)
Rose Byrne (Spy)
Cameron Diaz (Sex Tape)
Bobby Cannavale (Ant-Man)
Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (Suicide Squad)
David Zayas(Gotham)
Stephanie Kurtzuba (The Wolf of Wall Street)
Tracie Thomas (Cold Case)
Nicolette Pierini (The Punisher)
Patricia Clarkson (Easy A)
Michael J. Fox (Back To The Future)
Mila Kunis (Family Guy)
Ashton Kutcher (Two and a Half Men)
Bobby Moynihan (Revenge For Jolly)
Rihanna (Bates Motel)
George Clooney (Ocean’s Eleven)

In Harlem, Manhattan Island, N.Y.C, Annie Bennett lives in foster care with several other girls under the care of Colleen Hannigan, a bitter former singer who spends her days drinking or trying to find a husband. Annie spends Fridays waiting outside Domoni’s restaurant, believing her parents will come for her because a note written on a receipt from Domoni’s says they would return. When a city inspector checks on Hannigan’s treatment of the girls, Annie takes advantage of the situation; she manages to copy her social security number from his clipboard and heads off to get her information. Annie learns that there’s nothing more about her than what she already knows.Trying to save a Shiba Inu from bullies, Annie is nearly run over; however, she is saved by William Stacks, a germaphobe cell phone mogul running for mayor. Annie’s rescue goes viral on the internet, boosting Stacks popularity; per suggestion of Stacks’ campaign manager Guy Danlily, Annie moves in with Stacks to boost his popularity further. Annie enjoys her new surroundings, befriending Stacks’ assistant Grace Farrell. Annie also gets to adopt the stray dog from before, naming her Sandy. Bonding with Annie, Stacks reveals that he had humble beginnings in Queens; he never really knew his father due to his work hours, but believed he could understand him if he worked just as hard. Annie also helps Grace and Stacks begin realizing that they like each other romantically.Per Annie’s request, Stacks takes her and her friends in Hannigan’s foster care to see the premiere of MoonQuake Lake. Stacks is uninterested in the movie at first, but soon becomes a major fan, along with Grace. Per Annie and Grace’s insistence, Stacks joins in the after-movie party. After returning her friends home, Annie shows Grace her Friday routine of waiting to see if her parents will return; Grace sympathizes, agreeing to keep this a secret from Stacks. At Hannigan’s, the girls accidentally wake her; Hannigan snaps at them, saying rich people aren’t nice, and will ditch anyone they don’t like any more (recalling her own past). Slightly hungover, she laments about her situation of foster kids and her desire to reclaim stardom.When Annie is asked to read a speech during a charity event, she runs out, revealing that she doesn’t know how to read (despite being 10 years old and going to school). Stacks decides to get her a special-ed teacher, but Guy decides that Annie will only hinder Stacks’ campaign as his popularity isn’t improving any more. Teaming up with Hannigan, Guy plans to have imposters claim Annie as their daughter to boost Stacks popularity to the point where he wins; Guy will then share his payment with Hannigan. However, Guy plans to dump Annie back into the system after the election, not caring about her well-being. By the time Hannigan has second thoughts, Annie has already been kidnapped by the imposters; Hannigan tells Stacks about the plan, getting Guy fired. Stacks, Grace, Hannigan and the girls board Stacks’ helicopter; aided by the police, they chase the getaway car into the park. Annie, thinking Stacks arranged this (due to the kidnappers believing Stacks, not Guy, paid them), is upset and refuses to believe him when he tells her he didn’t know about the scheme. Stacks, to prove his innocence, announces to the press that he quits the mayoral race; Annie then helps Grace and Stacks admit their love. All three dance and sing happily.Later, Annie announces the opening of the “Stacks Literacy Centre”, to help children like herself, who couldn’t read. Everyone sings Annie’s Tomorrow; unhumorously, Hannigan attempts to continue singing after the song is done, only to receive stares that cue her to stop.Not sure why so many feel the need to bash this version of the movie just because they think they’re the top ‘original’ Annie movie fan of all time. Who cares if they made a new version…it’s not even close to being the same as the original. This one is  fun, and all of the actors/actresses are wonderful at acting and singing. I feel that the changes that were made were done so to reflect the times we live in…certain sayings from the original wouldn’t be related to as easily. Nothing wrong with liking both…they’re just movies, so I don’t think you’ll hurt the original Annie’s feelings if you decide to like this one just as much or more!!

CHRISTMAS 2017 REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – THE CHRISTMAS EPISODES – PART 3

TYUYTU

MAIN CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Mike Henry (Ted)
Patrick Warburton (Scream 3)

Don’t Be a Dickens at Christmas

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

Carrie Fisher (Star Wars)

JTYUJYTJTYJTYJTYAs Peter looks forward to enjoying the holidays at home, he finds that Lois expects him to participate in a number of other activities including vising a homeless shelter and spending Christmas with her parents. When he complains, she decides to leave him at home alone and takes the kids with her. While watching a Patrick Swayze film, he falls asleep and awakens to find Swayze as his guide in order to help him find his Christmas spirit. They visit his past where he spent a happy Christmas with his mom and peek in on several of the citizens of Quahog celebrating Christmas in the present. But in Peter’s future, he finds he has died and is forced to exist only as an aged Brian’s dog farts. He rushes to the Pewterschmidts to be with the family, but joins Patrick in a final dance to close out the episode.TYUTYUYUTYUAnother great festive Family Guy, strange in places but very entertaining, a must for the holidays.

 

CHRISTMAS 2017 REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – THE CHRISTMAS EPISODES – PART 2

family_guy

MAIN CAST

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Big Bad Beetleborgs)
Seth Green (Idle Hands)
Mila Kunis (Ted)
Mike Henry (The Cleveland Show)
Patrick Warburton (Men In Black 2)
Adam West (Batman 60s)
Jennifer Tilly (Bride of Chucky)

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GUEST CAST

Ty Simpkins (Jurassic World)

When Quahog experiences a snow day during the holiday season, Peter ruins Lois’ grandmother’s antique table in one of his stunts. When they go to the mall to replace it, Chris gets the idea to sit on Santa’s lap and ask for a trampoline, an idea endorsed by Peter, but when the line refuses to move they find the mall is without a Santa. Pressed into service as a replacement, Peter discovers the job comes with numerous benefits. Leaving the Fuzzy Clam in a drunken stupor with dinner, he runs into the real Santa who is annoyed at his behavior and threatens him with the naughty list if he refuses to give up being Santa. Peter calls his bluff and they engage in a war of pranks, but when the real Santa has had enough of such games, he slips his belt as a garrote around Peter’s neck and gives him a final warning to give up the job. Frightened, Peter agrees, but to show there is no hard feelings, Santa gives him a Penthouse as a gift that Peter originally found when he was twelve.Meanwhile, Stewie discovers that Brian has been crashing office Christmas parties in hopes of scoring food and women, although without luck. Stewie turns up to get a laugh at his attempts, but has a great time instead and tags along on further attempts. To liven up an otherwise dead party at a printer company, Stewie threatens the lightest drinkers with dismissal, which inspires the real boss to follow though with the threat and Stewie stays on as an employee. When he realizes that people have lost their jobs because of him, and further threats from the boss, he takes it upon himself to cut the remaining employees checks for $11,000 each, which was the extent of his ability.

All in all, “How the Griffin Stole Christmas” is an enjoyable episode. The funniest joke may have been when they make fun of those weird FarmersOnly.com farmer dating ads. Laughed my ass off. Another great Christmas episode to enjoy around the holiday season.

CHRISTMAS 2017 REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – THE CHRISTMAS EPISODES – PART 1

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MAIN CAST
Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Big Bad Beetleborgs)
Seth Green (Idle Hands)
Mila Kunis (Ted)
Mike Henry (The Cleveland Show)
Patrick Warburton (Men In Black 2)
Adam West (Batman 60s)
Jennifer Tilly (Bride of Chucky)

A VERY SPECIAL FAMILY GUY FREAKIN’ CHRISTMAS

GUEST CAST
Gene Simmons
Paul Stanley
Lois signs Stewie up to star as baby Jesus in a nativity scene at the Quahog Christmas pageant. Stewie plays along in hopes of pleasing Santa, whom he believes is omnipotent and thereby can supply him with plutonium. After Lois repeatedly reminds Peter to donate a present to charity, he mistakenly donates all of the family’s Christmas gifts to a needy kids’ charity. Lois seems unfazed by the mistake, but insists that the entire family shop for new presents at the mall. Peter reluctantly agrees, although he only wants to watch KISS Saves Santa on television; Brian stays behind to keep an eye on the turkey cooking in the oven. While at the mall, Peter finds a pair of barrettes that Meg wanted and ends up chasing down an old lady to a pet fish store called “Age of Aquariums”, where the old lady throws fish food on him so that all the fish jump onto him to feed while the old lady escapes.
Meanwhile at home, an ember shoots onto the family rug from the fireplace. While Brian tries to deal with this crisis, the overcooked turkey begins to burn. Brian finds a fire extinguisher, but to his dismay, it is merely a novelty item filled with plastic snakes, which, upon being released into the fire, promptly explode and make it worse. After using the real fire extinguisher, he slips on the foam from it and the TV falls on top of him. Afterwards the interior of the house is destroyed; Brian escapes, but with his paws burnt hairless. Amazingly, Lois maintains a cheerful attitude, saying that they just need to clean up a bit. However, when Meg tells her that they are out of paper towels, Lois suffers a nervous breakdown and screams at the family about how difficult it is to ensure that Christmas happens without a hitch, then runs from the ruined house on a rampage (Meg then ironically finds some paper towels mere seconds after Lois’ rampage).
Lois storms through town, berating people for their Christmas optimism. When she reaches town square, she climbs the Christmas tree there and grabs the ornamental star on top, bent on destroying it. The rest of the family arrives and Stewie, eager to perform a good deed to earn Santa’s grace, performs an extemporaneous monologue about Jesus and the meaning of Christmas. Lois, watching Stewie, regains her sanity, but Peter, who thinks Lois isn’t getting the message, allows the police to shoot her with a tranquilizer dart, just after she puts the star back on the tree. The next morning at Christmas, the family opens their presents: Stewie gets his plutonium; Peter gets a week’s vacation, a new VCR, and his own copy of Kiss Saves Santa; and Brian gets at what first appears to be a bottle of wine, but actually turns out to be a book. Lois is heavily sedated, sitting limply in a rocking chair and drooling. In the closing scene, the Griffins wish everyone a Merry Christmas (though Lois is still too numb to speak clearly).
The first time we got to see the Griffins celebrate Christmas and its become a classic. loved Stewie’s quote about Jeffrey Hunt. The Kiss saves Santa bits were quite fun too. all in all a great episode to start the holiday season.

ROAD TO THE NORTH POLE

GUEST CAST
Drew Barrymore (Poison Ivy)
David Boreanaz (Bones)
Carrie Fisher (Star Wars)
Bruce McGill (No Ordinary Family)
Ron MacFarlane
Brian takes Stewie to the mall, only to get a rude brush-off from Santa. As a result, Stewie vows to kill Santa for blowing him off and forces Brian to take him to the North Pole. Attempting to trick Stewie, he brings him to a Santa’s Village amusement park. Soon discovering the charade, Stewie threatens to shoot Brian if he does not take him to the real North Pole. Stewie hitches a ride with a trucker and so Brian follows him all the way to Canada. On the way, Stewie accidentally causes a traffic pileup by discharging a flare pistol in the cab of the truck, which catches fire and explodes. Crashing his car in a chain reaction, Brian becomes angry and tells Stewie that Santa does not exist. Stewie becomes frustrated and continues to attempt to hitchhike. The pair then encounter a Canadian who gives them his snowmobile.
Continuing north, they soon run out of gas, but receive help from the Aurora Boreanaz, who instructs them to stay at a nearby cabin. The two survive the night in the cabin and set out on foot the next morning. They finally make it to Santa’s workshop, only to find a dark, gloomy factory in a dreary, polluted, lifeless wasteland, Santa a sickly and somewhat psychopathic old man, the elves horribly inbred and mutated from Santa’s attempt to keep up with the increasing toy demands year after year, and the reindeer carnivorous feral monsters that eat the elves who wandered out into the snow to die of exhaustion. Santa suddenly collapses and is too sick to deliver the presents. Brian and Stewie agree to do it, only to waste time at their first stop and leave, after being discovered by a family, whom they later attack, The reindeer eat each other.
On Christmas morning, everybody wakes up to find no presents under their trees. They turn on the news, which is broadcasting the same story. Brian and Stewie appear on the broadcast and bring the dying Santa out in a wheelchair, explaining that humanity’s greed is killing him and if they don’t shorten their demands to one Christmas present a year, they may have to give up Christmas altogether. Chastened, everyone agrees and, one year later, Santa has recovered, the workshop is once again a lively, colorful Christmassy cottage and the elves and reindeer are all rejuvenated.
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Road to the North Pole is an amazing feature length exmas special, making it a Road to episode also makes it memorable. the Musical numbers are excellent and well written. The episode also has a heartwarming message come episodes end.

JESUS, MARY AND JOSEPH

GUEST CAST
Cleo King (Mik & Molly)
Bruce McGill (No Ordinary Family)
Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool)
As the Griffins prepare for Christmas by decorating their tree, Meg finds an ornament of the manger and Peter tells the story of Christmas. Joseph (played by Peter) and his friend Robby (played by Brian) spot Mary (played by Lois) in their village. Joseph introduces himself to her. They have many dates, but Joseph is annoyed by Mary’s reluctance to have sex. Mary claims that she is destined for something special. Later, Mary tells Joseph that she has been visited by an angel (played by Bruce) who told her that God has blessed her with his child. Joseph accepts this. Taking a break from the story, Peter and the family call their Aunt Helen to wish her a merry Christmas. The call does not go well and Peter returns to the story.
On the way to Bethlehem on a mule (played by Meg), Joseph is skeptical about the baby. Elsewhere, three wise men (played by Glenn Quagmire, Cleveland Brown, and Joe Swanson) are inspired to travel to Bethlehem themselves. They stop at the palace of King Herod (played by Carter Pewterschmidt) for water, and talk of their plans to see the Messiah. Herod decides to protect his title and win the love of Jodie Foster (a reference to John Hinckley, Jr.) by killing the child. Mary and Joseph arrive at an inn, but the manager (played by Mort Goldman) denies them a room. Mary goes into labor, and the manager offers them space in a stable. Mary ponders what to call the new child. The angel takes her list of possible names to God, who is inspired to name the child “Jesus” after something the angel said.
The wise men, who are following a light in the sky, argue about the nature of the light; they think it might be an airplane. A doctor tells them of an earlier messiah who was not successful. The wise men arrive with their gifts as the savior is born. A drummer boy (played by Chris) joins them. King Herod arrives with his army and demands the child. Jesus (played by Stewie) transforms the manger into a fighter plane and destroys Herod’s troops with it. After Peter finishes his story, a pregnant couple arrives at the door. They explain that their car broke down and they need help, but Peter, thinking that they’re faking, gives them the cold shoulder and threatens to call the police. When they press their request for help, Peter goes to get his baseball bat.
The Family Guy’s retelling of the Jesus Myth. Family Guy makes the myth far more entertaining than other adaptations. Not as good as Road To The North Pole, but then nothing could beat that one.

CHRISTMAS GUY

GUEST CAST
Tony Sirico (The Sopranos)
The Griffin family goes to Quahog Mall for the annual Christmas Carnival, but they find the festivities have been cancelled, causing Stewie to go on a destructive rampage. Vinny learns that Carter, Lois’s father, canceled the carnival. Peter confronts Carter who tells him that it was cancelled because he hates Christmas. Peter vows to help Carter find his Christmas spirit. Peter tries a fake story letter, making Carter drink egg nog in a hotel room, and having him masturbate, to no effect. When Peter accuses Carter of acting Jewish, Carter reverses his position on the carnival.
Despite being re-established at the Quahog Mall, the Christmas Carnival fails to raise Stewie’s spirits. When the Mall Santa Claus asks Stewie what he wants for Christmas, Stewie realizes he wants Brian back. Vinny pretends to be Brian, acting like an intellectual and a writer, but fails to cheer up Stewie. Trying to raise his spirits, Vinny and Stewie return to the Quahog Mall, where Stewie spots his past self time travelling to purchase a gift. Remembering the time travel occurred prior to Brian’s death, Stewie realizes he can use Past Stewie’s return pad to save Brian. Vinny appeals to Past Stewie’s vanity to obtain his backpack, and brings it to Present Stewie. Stewie says goodbye to Vinny, whom he and the family will no longer have met if Brian lives.
Stewie arrives in the past, saving Brian from being hit by the car. After explaining the situation to Brian, Stewie sends the return pad back to his past self in order to prevent a temporal paradox. Now unable to return and having altered his past, Stewie fades from existence as Brian thanks him for his actions. Unaware of what occurred, Past Stewie comes out of the house and wonders who Brian was talking to.
In the present on Christmas Day, Brian is alive and well. Grateful to him for saving his life, Brian thanks Stewie, who remains oblivious to his averted death, as well as his alternate self’s actions.
One of the most memorable Christmas episodes as it b rings back the beloved character Brian,  making Stewie’s Christmas wish come true.

THE 2,000 YEAR OLD VIRGIN

GUEST CAST
Ana Gasteyer (Mean Girls)
Lucas Grabeel (Smallville)
Emily Osment (Mom)
On a trip to the Quahog Mall before Christmas, Peter and Lois bump into Jesus and discover that he is still hanging around Quahog due to not being entirely comfortable dealing with his own home life with God. Jesus invites Peter over to his place. However, since it is a depressing bachelor apartment, Peter invites him out with Glenn Quagmire, Cleveland Brown, and Joe Swanson to have a drink. At the Drunken Clam, they start to plan a birthday party and Jesus tells them that he has never had sex: to make his birthday special, they promise to help him lose his virginity. Their attempts to achieve this fail, upsetting Peter. Lois tries to find out what Jesus likes, but her nice manners cause him to want to sleep with her. Approaching Peter about his issue to help him, Peter is shocked but agrees to help when Jesus promises him an expensive massage chair in return for sleeping with Lois. He lets Lois know about Jesus’ interest in her and she reluctantly agrees.
As they head out together, Peter enjoys his chair at the Drunken Clam. During this time, Peter has a fantasy of Lois and Jesus having sex and has second thoughts. These are confirmed when other members of the bar confirm that Jesus is not a virgin, but pulls this annual stunt every Christmas to have sex with people’s wives. Peter tries multiple ways to get to their liaison to stop things. Peter rushes to the room to find that no cheating took place as Lois decided that their marriage was too good. Jesus applauds their “lesson”, making the excuse that he concocted this charade as a tale of resisting temptation, and leaves them to celebrate their Christmas.
On Christmas Day, Rupert gives Stewie a Joni Mitchell CD for Christmas, disappointing him because Stewie had observed Rupert picking out a heart-shaped necklace. As Stewie tearfully listens to “Both Sides, Now” on the CD, he wonders whom the necklace was for, and it is revealed to be for Mayor Adam West.
A great Christmas episode that answers the question as to weather or not Jesus is a Virgin. Seeing Adam West as a crossdresser was quite disturbing thou.

CHRISTMAS 2017 REVIEW: THAT 70s SHOW – THE CHRISTMAS EPISODES

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MAIN CAST
Topher Grace (Spider-Man 3)
Mila Kunis (Ted)
Ashton Kutcher (The Butterfly Effect)
Danny Masterson (Yes Man)
Laura Prepon (Karla)
Wilmer Valderrama (Minority Report)
Debra Jo Rupp( Big)
Kurtwood Smith (Robocop)
Tanya Roberts (The Beastmaster)
Don Stark (John Carter)
Lisa Robin Kelly (The Net: The Series)
Tommy Chong (Evil Bong)
Josh Meyers (Bruno)

THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER

GUEST CAST
Marion Ross (Anger Management)
The episode begins with  the gang hanging out in the basement watching The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. Later, Eric asks if he can have a Christmas party in the basement, and surprisingly, Red says yes. when Eric asks for money for the party (for beer, actually) Red gives him $40 for the Christmas tree and says he can keep what money’s left over. However, the gang decides to chop down a tree at the side of the road in order to spend all the money on beer. At work, Bob asks Red if he’ll stay and work at the store on Christmas Eve. Bob says that since all the other stores are closed, some last-last-minute shoppers might swing by. To Red’s dismay, Kelso ends up being the only one to show up, and he buys a set of hot rollers for Jackie and plays few rounds of Pong with Red, who ends up purchasing that game for himself. Back at the house, a jealous Laurie pours rum in the punch Kitty made for Eric’s party. However, no one drinks it except for Jackie and three of her friends. Upstairs, two state troopers barge in to the party to inform Red and Kitty that their Christmas tree is a stolen one. Red then stops the party downstairs and takes Jackie and her friends home, and kicks everyone else out. Hyde then gives Donna her gift, a picture of the two in 5th grade. A jealous Eric then proceeds to give Donna White Shoulders perfume, the gift Hyde wanted to buy her but couldn’t afford.
A first Christmas for That 70s Show and a classic Eric trying to throw a party using the money he would of spent on a Tree. Laurie spikeing the punch making all the girls drunk and trying to seduce Fez is great.
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HYDE’S CHRISTMAS RAGER

GUEST CAST
Robert Hays (Airplane)
Matt Battaglia (Mike & Molly)
Now Hyde has moved from the over-protective Forman home to his carefree dad, barman Bud, the basement boys look forward to a keg party there, too frat-type for the girls’ taste. Kitty nearly saw trough their ‘Christmas’ preparations aren’t innocent, so the unsupervised drinking games deliver Eric so drunk he pours unprecedented disrespect and vomit all over Red’s shoes. Kitty isn’t interested in punishment, she cares for the utter lack of educational guidance ‘her boy’ Steven gets from his dad, so Red is made against his convictions to go read Bud the parental responsibility riot act.
A Second Christmas for the and another great episode. Hyde trying to bond with his father  whilst being allowed to get away with anything. Red finding the best punishment for Eric is a great highlight. That 70s Show always does great Christmas episodes.

AN ERIC FORMAN CHRISTMAS

GUEST CAST
Kevin McDonald (Epic Movie)
Nick Bakay (Sabrina)
The gang grumbles Christmas isn’t real fun any more, like when they were little kids, except Kelso who looks forward to the traditional X-mas children’s specials, but Jackie won’t let him watch. Kitty gets them to volunteer for pastor Dave’s church pageant, with Eric as director, who has an all too hard time stopping everyone for modernizing their parts most un-biblically. When Dave tries to take over directing and the lead, he is irreverently tied up, enough for Leo to give the sacrilegers heaps. Meanwhile Red is so angry at Bob’s seasonal ‘noise’ that he hides his neighbors’ decorations.
This is one of my all time favorite episodes, the best part is seeing the end result of the church pageant which you get to see over the episodes ending credits.

CHRISTMAS

GUEST CAST
Shannon Elizabeth (American Pie)
Ashley Eckstein (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)
Shonda Farr (Crossroads)
Red is chosen to be Santa claus, instead of Bob who grudgingly accepts to assist as an elf with Kitty, who by signing up the kids for the same duty unknowingly convinced the boys to attend the school dance they had sworn never to join again. Donna is furious when she learns Eric hangs out there and is now popular with a few schoolgirls, so she turns up during her radio show. Fez fears the football team will again lock him up in a locker. Hyde only came for Jackie’s sake. Kelso only went to avoid going to the library as Brooke suggested
 It’s great to see the gang growing up seeing how much they have come along. Red as Santa is creepy and disturbing but that’s what makes it funny. Kelso has some lovely scenes especially when he realises he would rather spend Christmas with Brooke.

WINTER

GUEST CAST
Carolyn Hennesy (Click
Kelso accidentally took the police department-donated gifts for needy kids, but Eric begs to keep some as Red never gave him any toys, just a rain coat and a hose-down to test it; opening ‘just one’ package leaves nothing unwrapped. The girls are flattered when Kitty invites them to help out the stuck-up ‘Ladies of Point Place’ (LOPPs) with their height of the year, the Christmas party, but angry because the boys couldn’t care less, Jackie is furious Hyde even reneges on his promise to attend in favor of boyish basement toy-games. Posh Patty Ryals marches in to take charge instead of Kitty because of an incident in 1963, ‘Santa’ Bob fondly remembers dating Patty. Red catches the boys playing, but with rare seasonal mildness lets them bring the toys to the community center, forcing him and the gang to stall Kitty.
Kelso stealing the toys is hilarious with out realising they were meant for the needy kids, Red showing surprising Christmas spirit in not turning the kids in.  Poor Eric getting tricked into going down the chimney and landing in a cake shop. Thankfully Donna rescues him.

WHO NEEDS YOU

GUEST CAST
Jud Tylor (Andromeda)
Jim Rash (The Descendants)
Fez almost loses his apartment when Jackie floods it. He’s ready to say “Good day!” to their co-habitation, but Jackie manages to salvage things by bonding with Fenton, the landlord, over shopping, and convincing him to let them stay. Red and Kitty are concerned over the number of arguments that Hyde and Samantha are having. But when they learn the reason for all the fights, it causes some sparks to fly in their own relationship. Donna tries to raise money for charity through her radio show and ends up having to resort to less than considerable ideas to do it.
Not much of a Christmas episode with the exception of Santa showing up at the end but still a great episode in the shows final year

REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – DVD SEASON 17

MAIN CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Mike Henry (Ted)
Jennifer Tilly (Curse of Chucky)
Patrick Warburton (Scream 3)
Adam West (60s Batman)

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

Ralph Garman (Ted)
Rachel MacFarlane (American Dad)
Nolan North (Con Men)
Emily Osment (Mom)
Amy Schumer (Trainwreck)
Tony Sirico (Goodfellas)
Fred Tatasciore (Hulk Vs)
Alexandra Breckenridge (The Walking Dead)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enterprise)
Kevin Michael Richardson (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)
Mae Whitman (Independence Day)
Kyle Chandler (Super 8)
Frank Sinatra Jr. (Cool World)
Lucas Grabeel (Smallville)
David Tennant (Doctor Who)
James Woods (Another Day In Paradise)
Gary Cole (Chuck)
Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Speciman)
Ursula Taherian (Pretty Little Liars)
Jerry Lambert (Graves)
Sean Penn (Gangster Squad)
Helene Yorke (Masters of Sex)
Carrie Fisher (Star Wars: The Force Awakens)
Christine Lakin (Hollywood Darlings)
Ava Acres (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend)
David Lynch (The Cleveland Show)
Ty Simpkins (Iron Man 3)
Sanaa Lathan (Blade)
Marlee Matlin (My Name Is Earl)
Martha Maclsaac (Superbad)
Ed Westwick (Gossip Girl)
Christina Pickles (The Wedding Singer)
H. Jon Benjamin (Wet Hot American Summer)
Dee Bradley Baker (American Dad)
Jon daly (Zoolander 2)
Nat Faxon (The Descendats)
Nicholas Gonzalez (The Flash)
Ana Ortiz (Ugly Betty)
Wil Sasso (Movie 43)
Christina Milian (Bring It On 5)
Carl Reiner (Two and A Half a Men)
Wendy Schaal (American Dad)
Kiernan Shipka (Mad Men)
Lisa Wilhoit (My So-Called Life)
Daniele Gaither (Madtv)
Aimee Garcia (Dexter)
Jim Rash (Community)
Portia de Rossi (Cursed)
Olesya Rulin (Powers)

This season is really season 15. The episodes this season are as follows.

THE BOYS IN THE BAND

Sick of how pandering children’s music is, Stewie and Brian start their own band, singing children’s songs with an adult edge, but Stewie’s old flame and acting school partner, Olivia, shows up and tries to sabotage him. Meanwhile, Chris gets a job as Quagmire’s personal assistant for his sex life.

BOOKIE OF THE YEAR

When Chris starts showing signs of aggression, Peter and Lois end up discovering that he is a talented baseball pitcher. Peter and the guys immediately start betting on the games, as other betters bet big against Chris after seeing him and then lose huge wagers, but Peter is put into an impossible position when the only way to salvage his title game bets is to have Chris lose on purpose. Meanwhile, Brian and Stewie reunite with Frank Sinatra Jr. to open an Italian restaurant, but the restaurant ends up losing money when Frank begins to give everyone free meals.

AMERICAN GIGG-ALO

When the local airline pilots go on strike, Quagmire is forced to look for a new job and gets one as a gigolo. But when his clients refuse to pay him, Peter is forced to help him out, and their friendship quickly turns into a prostitute/pimp partnership. Meanwhile, Brian gets a job at a hardware store when Peter takes him off his health insurance, and Stewie goes from trying to get him fired to having to perform impromptu surgery to save Brian’s life.

INSIDE FAMILY GUY

James Woods hosts a special episode that takes a look behind the scenes of Family Guy. Meanwhile, Peter is replaced and pitches his own television series to Fox.

CHRIS HAS A GOT A DATE, DATE, DATE, DATE

Pop singer Taylor Swift agrees to be Chris’ date at his homecoming dance, and even though Chris is kind and charming, she sabotages the relationship and then uses the experience to write another song about how the men in her life mistreat her. Meanwhile, Peter becomes an Uber driver.

HOT SHOTS

Peter and Lois get involved in the anti-vaccination movement to save Stewie from autism, causing a measles epidemic to break out in Quahog.

HIGH SCHOOL ENGLISH

While Peter is hiding out in a library to escape the police for crashing into a family’s house, he reads three novels that are commonly taught (and sometimes banned) in American high schools: The Great Gatsby, Tom Sawyer / The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, and Of Mice and Men.

CARTER AND TRICIA

Peter tells Tricia Takanawa about Carter’s plan to use toxic chemicals in Pawtucket Patriot when Carter buys the brewery. Meanwhile, Brian’s driver’s license expires, and he gets help from Stewie to renew it.

HOW THE GRIFFIN STOLE CHRISTMAS

Peter becomes a mall Santa, and he becomes drunk with power when he learns that he can get away with anything, but the real Santa is mad about this and takes direct action to stop Peter. Meanwhile, Stewie and Brian crash Christmas parties for free food, drama, and women.

PASSENGER FATTY-SEVEN

Quagmire receives free tickets to fly to San Francisco, and Peter, Cleveland and Joe tag along. Soon after, the guys get into a serious situation when Quagmire’s plane gets hijacked, which puts Quagmire’s flying skills to the test.

GRONKOWSBEES

Peter and the guys discover Rob Gronkowski of the New England Patriots moving into the house behind the Griffins, but they soon get annoyed with his lifestyle and partying. Meanwhile, Brian discovers that Stewie is a beekeeper and suggests he sell his honey publicly.

PETER’S DEF JAM

Peter becomes a DJ after he and the guys attempt to start their own podcast, leading to discord and (in Peter’s case) deafness. Meanwhile, Brian is forced to move into Stewie’s room after Lois gets an allergy.

THE FINER STRINGS

Peter and the guys form a string quartet, and everyone makes the cut except for Peter, who is kicked out. Meanwhile, Brian becomes Carter’s seeing eye dog.

THE DATING GAME

When Quagmire discovers Tinder, Peter, Cleveland and Joe must save him from his soul-sucking hedonism. Meanwhile, Stewie is diagnosed with scoliosis and (briefly) enjoys the benefits of being injured.

COP AND A HALF-WIT

Peter helps Joe solve cases, but he gets irritated when Joe takes all the credit for himself. Meanwhile, Brian and Chris look after Stewie after he gets a concussion playing football.

SATURATED FAT GUY

Peter opens up his own fattening-foods truck to rebel against Lois’ healthy-eating plans and to make some extra cash, but feasting on his own wares has terrible effects on Peter’s health. Meanwhile, Meg joins a roller derby team, despite Chris’ warnings that it’s too dangerous.

PETER’S LOST YOUTH

Peter gets jealous when Lois upstages him at a Boston Red Sox fantasy baseball camp. Meanwhile, Stewie runs away from home when Meg becomes his babysitter.

THE PETER PRINCIPAL

When Peter temporarily becomes the high school principal, Meg sees his power as an opportunity to get back at her bullies. Meanwhile, Brian and Stewie open up a bed and breakfast and have to deal with a lot of prostitutes.

DEARLY DEPORTED

When Chris’ Mexican girlfriend, Isabella, is deported, he steps up to take care of her twin babies. He eventually enlists his parents and Quagmire to head into Mexico and bring her back to the U.S.

A HOUSE FULL OF PETERS

After Lois discovers that Peter was a sperm donor in his youth, Peter’s past comes back to him when many of his children unexpectedly come to his house – one of whom wants to usurp his place as Lois’ husband.

Celebrate laughter, lunacy and all that jazz with this outrageous collection of 20 Family Guy episodes. It’s a freakin’ hilarious complete season,