REVIEW: DUNKIRK

CAST

Fionn Whitehead (Him)
Tom Glynn-Carney (Tolkien)
Jack Lowden (’71)
Harry Styles (One Direction: This Is Us)
Aneurin Barnard (Radioactive)
James D’Arcy (Agent Carter)
Barry Keoghan (American Animals)
Cillian Murphy (Batman Begins)
Kenneth Branagh (Murder On The Orient Express)
Mark Rylance (Ready Player One)
Tom Hardy (Legend)
Michael Caine (The Dark Knight)

Fionn Whitehead in Dunkirk (2017)In 1940, during the Battle of France, hundreds of thousands of Allied soldiers have retreated to Dunkirk. Tommy, a young British private, is the sole survivor of a German ambush. At the beach, he finds thousands of troops awaiting evacuation and meets Gibson, who is burying a body. After a German dive-bomber attack, they find a wounded man. They rush his stretcher onto a hospital ship, hoping to remain aboard, but are ordered off. The ship is sunk by dive bombers; Tommy helps another soldier, Alex, out of the water. They leave at night on a destroyer, but it is sunk by a U-boat. Gibson opens a hatch, freeing Tommy and Alex from the hold, and they get back to the beach.Mark Rayner, Mark Fichera, Aneurin Barnard, Harry Styles, Fionn Whitehead, and RJ Casey in Dunkirk (2017)With only a single, vulnerable mole available for mooring deep-draft ships, the Royal Navy requisitions civilian vessels in the UK that can get to the beach. In Weymouth, a civilian sailor Dawson and his son Peter set out on his boat Moonstone, rather than let the Navy commandeer her. Impulsively, Peter’s teenage friend George joins them. At sea, they rescue a shivering shell-shocked soldier from a wrecked ship. When he realises that Dawson is sailing for Dunkirk, the soldier demands that they turn back and tries to wrest control of the boat; in the struggle, George falls and suffers a head injury that renders him blind. Three Spitfires cross the English Channel, heading towards Dunkirk. After their leader is shot down in a dogfight, one of the pilots, Farrier, assumes command, although his fuel gauge is shattered. They save a minesweeper from a German Heinkel He 111 bomber, but the other Spitfire is hit and ditches. The pilot, Collins, cannot open his canopy to escape, but is rescued by Moonstone.Kenneth Branagh and James D'Arcy in Dunkirk (2017)Tommy, Alex and Gibson join some soldiers from a Highlanders regiment and hide inside a trawler that is beached outside the Allied perimeter. German troops shoot at the boat, and water enters through the bullet holes. Alex, hoping to lighten the boat, accuses Gibson (who has been silent throughout) of being a German spy, and demands that he leave. Gibson reveals he is French; he stole the identity of the dead soldier he buried, hoping to be evacuated with the British. The soldiers abandon the fishing boat when it begins to sink. Gibson is unable to get out and drowns. Alex and Tommy swim towards a nearby destroyer, but it is sunk by a bomber. Moonstone manoeuvres to take on those in the water, including Alex and Tommy. Peter discovers that George is dead; when asked by the shell-shocked soldier, he lies that George is fine. Farrier shoots down the bomber before his fuel runs out. Gliding over the beach, he shoots down a dive-bomber, and then lands beyond the perimeter. He sets fire to his plane and is then taken prisoner. At the beach, Royal Navy Commander Bolton watches the last British soldiers leave. He notes that nearly 300,000 have been evacuated, ten times more than Prime Minister Winston Churchill had hoped for. He remains to oversee the evacuation of the French.Aneurin Barnard, Harry Styles, and Fionn Whitehead in Dunkirk (2017)Arriving back in Weymouth, Dawson is congratulated for having saved so many men. The shell-shocked soldier sees George’s body being carried away. Peter goes to the local newspaper; a front-page article later commends George as a hero. Alex and Tommy board a train, and Alex expects public hostility as the train approaches Woking, but they receive a hero’s welcome instead. Tommy reads out Churchill’s address to the nation from a newspaper. Tom Hardy in Dunkirk (2017)This is an extraordinary film of a moment that was far from the military’s finest hour and though the soldiers are the first to admit that, ‘All we did was survive’, it’s a tremendously patriotic film about the courage, not just of the soldiers, but of the civilians who selflessly took their own boats across the channel to rescue thousands and thousands of troops. This is a testament to the courage of the few for the many and is sure to feature in many top ten lists and rightly so

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REVIEW: STONEHEARST ASYLUM

CAST

Kate Beckinsale (Underworld)
Jim Sturgess (21)
Michael Caine (The Dark Knight)
Ben Kingsley (Iron Man 3)
David Thewlis (Wonder Woman)
Brendan Gleeson (Paddington 2)
Sinéad Cusack (Wrath of The Titans)
Sophie Kennedy Clark (The Danish Girl)
Christopher Fulford (Tower Block)
Jason Flemyng (From Hell)

Kate Beckinsale and Sophie Kennedy Clark in Eliza Graves (2014)In 1899, an Oxford University professor demonstrates a case of female hysteria, Lady (Eliza) Graves (Kate Beckinsale), before his class. The patient is drugged and protesting that she is sane, but the professor points out that all mental patients claim to be sane, much as all criminals claim to be innocent. He ignores her demands that he not touch her to induce a fit for the students to observe. The professor advises his students to believe nothing they hear and only half of what they see. Later, a young man, the newly-minted Dr. Edward Newgate, (Jim Sturgess), arrives at Stonehearst Asylum on Christmas Eve, where he desires to take up residency. A group of armed men led by Mickey Finn (David Thewlis) allow him entry. Finn escorts him to the office of the superintendent, Dr. Silas Lamb (Ben Kingsley). Although Lamb was not expecting him, despite Newgate having sent letters preceding his arrival, he welcomes the help of an Oxford-educated doctor and grants him the residency.Eliza Graves (2014)Newgate is surprised by Lamb’s unorthodox methods and uncustomarily humane asylum. Lamb explains that he does not believe in drugging or incarcerating his patients, and he encourages their delusions when he feels it will bring them greater happiness, thus creating a kind and dignified environment at the asylum. Lady Graves, now a resident at Stonehearst, is introduced to Newgate, who appears immediately smitten. Lamb explains that Lady Graves has an abusive and painful past. She developed hysteria from enduring her husband’s “unnatural appetites” and can no longer bear emotional or physical contact without seizing in hysterical fits. She stabbed her husband in the right eye with a comb and bit off his left ear trying to protect herself, which led to her father committing her into the asylum to escape her marriage to her “monster” of a husband. Her husband has since been trying to free her back into his care. Dr. Lamb is currently prescribing musical therapy for her and refuses to declare her sane, for her own safety.Kate Beckinsale and Jim Sturgess in Eliza Graves (2014)Though she brushes aside Newgate’s attempts at flirtation, she is struck by his empathy and respectful demeanor. An elaborate Christmas feast follows, during which the staff and patients mingle and a small fight between Newgate and Finn occurs, cementing their dislike for one another. After the dinner, Lady Graves delivers ominous warnings to Newgate, and quietly insists that he flee the asylum, but Newgate refuses to leave without her. The reason for Lady Graves’s warning soon reveals itself. Newgate discovers dozens of prisoners being kept in basement cells. The prisoners reveal that they are the true staff of Stonehearst, and the doctors and nurses Newgate has met upstairs are actually patients.Michael Caine in Eliza Graves (2014)The real superintendent, Dr. Benjamin Salt (Michael Caine), explains that Lamb and Finn drugged their drinks and led a revolt. Dr. Salt and Mrs. Pike (Sinéad Cusack), the matron, warn Newgate that Lamb is a dangerous madman – a surgeon who murdered his patients during wartime. Isolated and with limited options of regaining control over the asylum even should they be freed, the staff must remain in their cells to await outside assistance. They request that Dr. Newgate locate the keys in Finn’s possession to release them, or else escape to London and seek help. Lamb begins his unorthodox training for Newgate’s residency through an enlightening, if hands-on, lesson in patient dignity. Newgate attempts to recruit Lady Graves to his cause of freeing the true staff, but she declines to become involved and tells him of Salt’s and his staff’s inhuman abuses. Newgate reveals the scars of his own abusive past and tells her he understands.Kate Beckinsale in Eliza Graves (2014)Newgate sneaks into Lamb’s office and successfully retrieves Salt’s notes, but not the keys. While hiding, he overhears Lamb and Finn discussing him. Finn is deeply suspicious of Newgate, but Lamb believes Newgate shows promise and could be a great asylum doctor one day. Both acknowledge the prisoners in the basement, and Lamb promises that the loose ends will be tied up by the New Year. Salt’s notes detail his barbaric medical treatments used against Lamb, who had been under his care for nine years without cracking before the uprising. Newgate is conflicted when, after two of the prisoners in the basement escape to seek help, both die under suspicious circumstances after being caught by Finn.Ben Kingsley and Jim Sturgess in Eliza Graves (2014)While the patients are happy and thriving, there are some definite failings to Lamb’s method of running the asylum. They are quickly running out of provisions and having difficulties keeping up with the every-day demands of the large institution, such as heating the building in winter. Some of the more violent patients, such as Finn, are also difficult to control, and he eventually murders a female patient. By New Year’s Eve, the patients are burning the furnishings for warmth and Lamb has destroyed Salt’s mind via cranial electroshock, turning him into a patient in his own institution. Newgate is convinced the situation must come to an end and that he and Lady Graves should escape.Ben Kingsley in Eliza Graves (2014)Newgate’s attempt to drug the patients and gain control of the asylum is thwarted and Lamb prepares Newgate for electric shock therapy to turn him into a mental patient to live among them. It is revealed that Newgate had come to the asylum specifically to rescue Lady Graves, whom he had seen at the Oxford medical demonstration and become fixated with. Before the treatment, Lamb grants Newgate a final request: to see a picture of Lady Graves that he keeps in his pocket. The true object in his pocket, a picture of one of the young soldiers Lamb shot (which Newgate discovered in the padded cell Salt kept Lamb in), causes Lamb to stagger out of the room in a fugue. Finn goes to pick up the electric prods to finish the job, but Newgate is rescued by Lady Graves who overcomes her hysterical fits to kill Finn via electrocution. A fire starts and spreads as Lady Graves rescues the staff from their cells and leads the patients out of the building.Kate Beckinsale in Eliza Graves (2014)Lamb has now become near-stuporous from the crushing flashbacks of his past actions when, under extreme pressure during his time as a field doctor, Lamb had snapped and executed his battlefield patients as a form of mercy killing before attempting to kill himself. After all are rescued, as daylight breaks, Newgate again asks Lady Graves to leave with him, but she says that she cannot be with him because he is sane and she is not. Newgate says that he is not sane, as he is madly in love with her, and he intimates that he has a secret to tell her. Later, Lady Graves’ husband and the earlier Oxford professor arrive at the asylum. The asylum has been restored to a gentler order under the kind hand of Mrs. Pike, who is now in charge and has incorporated many of Lamb’s methods of treatment.Kate Beckinsale and Jim Sturgess in Eliza Graves (2014)The professor demands Lady Graves’ release, but Mrs. Pike says that Dr. Newgate already released her weeks ago. The professor reveals that he is the true Dr. Newgate and the one they knew is an impostor. The Dr. Newgate they met was never a medical student, nor a doctor at all, but an escaped mental patient who had also been part of the exhibition. Dr. Lamb, playing chess with the reduced Dr. Salt, hears this and shows a spark of his previous self as he gleefully remarks “Checkmate.” Lady Graves and the impostor Newgate end the film at the Santa Cristina Asylum in Tuscany, Italy, where they are known as Dr. and Mrs. Lamb, treating mental patients with the original Lamb’s methods. The two dance happily and embrace in a beautiful garden.LIkely the film would not have worked so well under less competent actors hands, but Anderson was wise in casting David Thewlis, Brendan Gleeson, Ben Kingsley, Michael Cain, Sinéad Cusack, Jason Flemyng, as well as Kate Beckinsale and Jim Sturgess. It may at first seem like another Brad Anderson thriller, but there are some twist and turns that alter the story into a truly psychological examination of just what is insanity.

REVIEW: GOING IN STYLE

CAST

Morgan Freeman (The Dark Knight)
Michael Caine (Interstellar)
Alan Arkin (Get Smart)
Joey King (The Dark Knight Rises)
Maria Dizzia (Captain Phillips)
Matt Dillon (Crash)
Ann-Margret (The 10th Kingdom)
Christopher Lloyd (The Addams Family)
Kenan Thompson (The Smurfs)
John Ortiz (Fast & Furious)
Peter Serafinowicz (Spy)

Going in Style (2017)Joe, Willie, and Albert are senior citizens and lifelong friends living in New York. During an unpleasant appointment at the bank, Joe is one of the victims to witness a robbery in progress carried out by three individuals wearing black masks. During the robbery, he notices the leader bearing a Mongol warrior tattoo on his neck as the only lead that could help the police identify the culprit. However, the leader sympathizes with Joe when he finds out about his current financial situation brought up by the bank. Then, the robbers manage to escape with over $1.6 million.Going in Style (2017)When the company they worked for is bought out, their pensions become a casualty of the restructuring. Joe is hit particularly hard and finds out that he, his daughter, Rachel, and granddaughter, Brooklyn, will be homeless in less than 30 days. Willie finds out he’s gravely ill from kidney failure and needs a transplant and is even more frustrated because his financial situation forces him into a long-distance relationship with his daughter and granddaughter. Desperate, the three friends decide to rob the bank that is going to restructure their pension funds and take back what is rightfully theirs.Morgan Freeman in Going in Style (2017)Inspired by his experience of the robbery, Joe originates the idea; at first Albert and Willie are appalled, but eventually agree when they later learn that their bank intends to steal their pensions. Trying to shoplift some items from a grocery store, where Al’s love interest, Annie, works, results in a comic disaster, so the trio turn to Joe’s former son-in-law, Murphy, and a criminal working as a pet store owner named Jesus to teach them the ropes. They plan an alibi using their lodge’s carnival as a cover.Morgan Freeman, Alan Arkin, and Michael Caine in Going in Style (2017)Joe, Willie, and Albert disguise themselves as “The Rat Pack” (Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis, Jr.) and use guns with blanks so that no one gets hurt. The robbery almost goes awry when Willie collapses briefly and a child witness partially pulls off his mask to allow him to breathe better; she sees the wrist watch he wears with a picture of his granddaughter on it as he engages in a friendly conversation and sympathizes with her, so as not to let her feel intimidated about the robbery in progress and when the bank manager clumsily tries to fire shots at them; however, the three manage to get away with over $2.3 million. They are soon arrested on suspicion by FBI Agent Hamer after the manager from the grocery store recognizes Al’s walk from the video surveillance cameras, but they all stick to their alibis.Morgan Freeman, Alan Arkin, and Michael Caine in Going in Style (2017)Hamer puts them along with other senior suspects into a police lineup, using the child witness who partially took off Willie’s mask. She refuses to identify Willie, leaving Hamer with no case. Willie suffers total renal failure and is near death until Al agrees to donate a kidney. While part of the money is used to help the three friends with their financial situations, the rest is given to their families, friends, co-workers, and fellow members at the lodge. Joe finally gets his granddaughter a puppy he promised her if she got A’s in every subject at school; courtesy of Jesus, who is later revealed to be the leader of the robbers from the robbery Joe witnessed and has laundered the money that they stole. The tattoo on his neck is also revealed to be a fake made of henna, intended to throw the FBI and the police off the scent. The movie ends at Al and Annie’s wedding as the three friends celebrate their good fortune.Morgan Freeman, Alan Arkin, and Michael Caine in Going in Style (2017)I have a distaste for remakes but every once in a while they work. The 1979 original had a great cast with Lee Starsberg, Art Carney and George Burns. The bar was set high, but if you can find an equally talented cast Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman and Alan Arkin you might just pull it off. Add a supporting cast with Ann Margaret, Christopher LLoyd and Matt Dillon and you have a recipe for success. This is an enjoyable film that is well worth watching.

 

REVIEW: CHILDREN OF MEN

CAST

Clive Owen (King Arthur)
Julianne Moore (Hannibal)
Clare-Hope Ashitey (The White King)
Michael Caine (The Dark Knight)
Chiwetel Ejiofor (Serenity)
Charlie Hunnam (Crimson Peak)
Pam Ferris (The Raven)
Peter Mullan (Braveheart)
Danny Huston (The Number 23)

In 2027, after 18 years of global human infertility, civilization is on the brink of collapse as humanity faces extinction. The United Kingdom, one of the very few stable nations with a functioning government, is deluged by asylum seekers fleeing the chaos and war which have taken hold around the world. In response, the UK has become a police state as the British Army round up and detain immigrants. Theo Faron, a former activist turned cynical bureaucrat, is kidnapped by the Fishes, a militant immigrants’ rights group. They are led by Theo’s estranged wife, Julian Taylor, from whom he separated after their son Dylan’s death during a 2008 flu pandemic.Julian offers Theo money to acquire transit papers for a young refugee named Kee, which Theo obtains from his cousin Nigel, a government minister who runs a state-sponsored collection of salvaged art from around the world. The transit papers require that the bearer must be accompanied, so Theo agrees to escort Kee in exchange for a large sum. Luke, a Fishes member, drives them and former midwife Miriam towards the coast to a boat. They are ambushed by an armed gang, and Julian is killed. Luke kills two police officers who stop their car, and they bury Julian in the forest as Theo breaks down crying over her death. The group ditches their car for another to escape to a Fishes safe house.Kee reveals to Theo that she is pregnant, as Julian had told her to trust only Theo. Julian had intended to hand Kee to the “Human Project”, a supposed scientific group in the Azores dedicated to curing infertility; however, Luke persuades Kee to stay, and he is later voted as the new leader of the Fishes. Later that night, Theo eavesdrops on a meeting of Luke and other Fishes. He discovers that Julian’s death was orchestrated by the Fishes so Luke could take over as leader, that they intend to kill Theo in the morning, and that they intend to use the baby as a political tool to support the coming revolution. Theo wakes Kee and Miriam, and they steal a car, escaping to the secluded hideaway of Theo’s aging friend Jasper Palmer, a former political cartoonist turned pot dealer.

The group makes plans to board the Human Project ship Tomorrow, which will arrive offshore from a refugee camp at Bexhill-on-Sea. Jasper proposes getting Syd, a camp guard to whom he frequently sells drugs, to smuggle them into Bexhill masquerading as refugees. The Fishes discover Jasper’s house, and the group flees while Jasper stays behind to stall the Fishes. Luke shoots and kills Jasper as Theo watches from the woods. The group waits for Syd in an abandoned school, where Miriam confides in Theo how many pregnancies miscarried at the beginning of the infertility crisis and her sadness at how “as the sound of the playgrounds faded, the despair set in. Very odd, what happens in a world without children’s voices”. The group then meets with Syd and are transported to Bexhill, where they see refugees being beaten, tortured, robbed, and executed by camp guards and police. When Kee’s contractions begin on a bus, Miriam distracts a suspicious guard by feigning mania. She is taken away and hooded.At the camp, Theo and Kee meet a Romanian woman, Marichka, who provides a room where Kee gives birth to a baby girl. The next day, Syd finds them in their room, and informs Theo and Kee that war has broken out between the British Army and the refugees, including the Fishes. Having learned that they have a bounty on their heads, Syd attempts to capture them, but Marichka and Theo fight him off and escape. Amidst the fighting, the Fishes capture Kee and the baby. Theo tracks them to an apartment under heavy fire where he confronts Luke, who is then killed by a tank shell, and escorts Kee and the baby out. Awed by the baby, the combatants temporarily stop fighting; staring at the screaming baby, they allow the group to leave. Marichka leads Theo, Kee, and the baby to a boat in a sewer, and Theo rows away whilst Marichka stays behind. As they watch the bombing of Bexhill by the Royal Air Force from a distance, Theo reveals that he had been shot by Luke. He tells Kee how to wind her baby to soothe her crying, and Kee tells Theo she will name the baby after his and Julian’s lost son, Dylan. Theo loses consciousness from his wounds as the Tomorrow approaches through the fog.Children of Men is a gut-wrenching look at an all too possible future, but it also works as a heart-stopping, adrenaline-rush-inducing piece of entertainment featuring some of the most breathtaking camera work you’ll ever see.

CHRISTMAS 2017 REVIEW: THE MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL

CAST

Michael Caine (The Dark Knight)
Steven Mackintosh (The Land Girls)
Meredith Braun (Doctors)
Robin Weaver (The Inbetweeners)
Jessica Fox (Hollyoaks)
Dave Goelz (Labyrinth)
Steve Whitmire (The Dark Crystal)
Jerry Nelson (Sesame Street)
Frank Oz (Star Wars)

On Christmas Eve, in 19th Century London, Charles Dickens (played by Gonzo the Great) and his friend Rizzo act as narrators throughout the film. Ebenezer Scrooge, a surly money-lender, does not share the merriment of Christmas. Scrooge rejects his nephew Fred’s invitation to Christmas dinner, dismisses two gentlemen’s collecting money for charity, and tosses a wreath at a carol singing Bean Bunny. His loyal employee Bob Cratchit (played by Kermit the Frog) and the other bookkeepers request to have Christmas Day off since there will be no business for Scrooge on the day, to which he reluctantly agrees. Scrooge leaves for home while the bookkeepers celebrate Christmas. In his house, Scrooge encounters the ghosts of his late business partners Jacob and Robert Marley (played by Statler and Waldorf), who warn him to repent his wicked ways or he will be condemned in the afterlife like they were, informing him that three spirits will visit him during the night.At one o’clock, Scrooge is visited by the childlike Ghost of Christmas Past who takes him back in time to his childhood and early adult life, Dickens and Rizzo hitching a ride too. They visit his lonely school days, and then his time as an employee under Fozziwig (Mr. Fezziwig from the original story, played by Fozzie Bear), who owned a rubber chicken factory. Fozziwig and his mother throw a Christmas party, Scrooge attends and meets a young woman named Belle, whom he falls in love with. However, the Ghost shows Scrooge how Belle left him when he chose money over her. A tearful Scrooge dismisses the Ghost as he returns to the present.At two o’clock, Scrooge meets the gigantic, merry Ghost of Christmas Present who shows him the joys and wonder of Christmas Day. Scrooge and the Ghost visit Fred’s house where Scrooge is made fun of. Scrooge and the spirit then visit Bob Cratchit’s house, learning his family is surprisingly content with their small dinner, Scrooge taking pity on Bob’s ill son Tiny Tim (played by Robin the Frog). The Ghost of Christmas Present abruptly ages, commenting that Tiny Tim will likely not survive until next Christmas. Scrooge and the Ghost go to a cemetery, where the latter fades away, informing Scrooge that the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come will arrive shortly. A fog fills the cemetery, revealing the third Ghost, who appears as a tall, silent cloaked figure. While Dickens and Rizzo abandon the audience to avoid being frightened, the Ghost takes Scrooge into the future.Scrooge and the Ghost witness a group of businessmen discussing the death of an unnamed colleague where they would only attend the funeral if lunch is provided. In a den, Scrooge recognizes his charwoman, his laundress, and the local undertaker trading several stolen possessions of the deceased to a fence named Old Joe. The Ghost transports Scrooge to Bob’s house, discovering Tiny Tim has died. Scrooge is escorted back to the cemetery, where the Ghost points out his own grave, revealing Scrooge was the man who died. Realizing this, Scrooge decides to change his ways.Awakening in his bedroom on Christmas Day, Scrooge decides to surprise Bob’s family with a turkey dinner, and ventures out with Bean, Dickens, Rizzo, and the charity workers to spread happiness and joy around London. Scrooge goes to the Cratchit house, at first putting on a stern demeanor, but reveals he intends on raising Bob’s salary and pay off his mortgage. Dickens narrates how Scrooge became a secondary father to Tiny Tim, who escaped death. Scrooge, the Cratchits, and the neighborhood celebrate Christmas.I love this movie. I am a big muppet fan, and when this movie came out on dvdI had to get it. It’s a great movie to watch over Christma. It’s a story we all know well, but the Muppet’s and Michael Caine add extra charm to it.

 

REVIEW: AUSTIN POWERS IN GOLDMEMBER

 

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CAST

Mike Myers (Shrek)
Beyonce Knowles (Dreamgirls)
Michael York (Logan’s Run)
Robert Wagner (Two and a Half Men)
Michael Caine (Batman Begins)
Rob Lowe (The West Wing)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Verne Troyer (The Love Guru)
Heather Graham (From Hell)
Mindy Sterling (Minions)
Fred Savage (The Wonder Years)
Clint Howard (Apollo 13)
Masi Oka (Heroes)
Brian Tee (Jurassic World)
Fred Stoller (Little Man)
Greg Grunberg (Alias)
Rachel Roberts (Flashforward)
Nathan Lane (The Birdcage)
Kristen Johnston (3rd Rock From the Sun)
Tom Cruise (Legend)
Danny DeVito (Batman Returns)
Gwyneth Paltrow (Iron Man)
Kevin Spacey (American Beauty)
Britney Spears (Crossroads)
Tommy Lister (The Dark Knight)
Nichole Hiltz (Smallville)
John Travolta (The Punisher)
Kevin Spacey (Superman Returns)

 

In his new headquarters behind the famous Hollywood sign, Dr. Evil plans to travel back in time to 1975 and bring back Johan van der Smut, aka “Goldmember”, who developed a cold fusion unit for a tractor beam which Dr. Evil names “Preparation H”. He intends to use the tractor beam to pull a meteor into the Earth, striking the polar ice caps and causing a global flood. Moments after this plan is revealed, Austin Powers and the British Secret Service attack the base and arrest Dr. Evil. Austin is knighted for his services, but is disappointed when his father, the famous super-spy Nigel Powers, does not attend the event. Basil Exposition later informs Austin that Nigel has been kidnapped, and the only clue is that the crew of his yacht have had their genitalia painted gold.Austin visits the imprisoned Dr. Evil, who tells him that Goldmember is behind the abduction. Time-travelling to 1975, Austin infiltrates Goldmember’s roller disco club and is reunited with his former lover, FBI agent Foxxy Cleopatra, who is undercover as a disco singer. With Foxxy’s help, Austin locates his father, but is unable to rescue him. Goldmember takes Nigel through Dr. Evil’s time machine into the present day. Foxxy wants revenge on Goldmember for murdering her partner, and accompanies Austin in his pursuit. In the present, Dr. Evil and Mini-Me instigate a riot in their prison, allowing them to escape. A British Intelligence mole named Number 3 informs Austin that Dr. Evil has moved to a new lair near Tokyo. Austin and Foxxy travel to Tokyo and confront Fat Bastard, who is now a sumo wrestler, but still does work for Dr. Evil. Fat Bastard explains that a Japanese business man, Mr. Roboto, is working on a device for Dr. Evil and Goldmember.Austin and Foxxy later meet with Mr. Roboto, who pleads ignorance about Nigel’s whereabouts. Unconvinced, Austin and Foxxy infiltrate Roboto’s factory where the command unit for the tractor beam is being loaded in Goldmember’s car, and Roboto hands Goldmember a golden key needed to activate the beam. Foxxy confronts Goldmember while Austin attempts to free Nigel, but Goldmember escapes with the command unit and flees to Dr. Evil’s submarine. Unable to settle their differences, Nigel and Austin part ways when they disagree on how to deal with the situation. Meanwhile, Dr. Evil’s son, Scott Evil, has become increasingly evil in an attempt to prove himself to his father, to the point that he too is going bald. Scott presents his father with sharks with laser beams attached to their heads, a request that had gone unfulfilled in the first film. Dr. Evil replaces Mini-Me with Scott as his favored son; the rejected Mini-Me defects and joins Austin.Austin, Foxxy and Mini-Me (now a miniature version of Austin) infiltrate the submarine, but Austin is captured. Dr. Evil prepares to activate the tractor beam, but Foxxy has stolen the key and frees Austin. Austin prepares to shoot Dr. Evil, when Nigel appears and reveals Dr. Evil and Austin are brothers, separated when they were toddlers when an assassination attempt killed their mother, and Dr. Evil was found and raised by Belgians. Dr. Evil and Austin embrace, enraging Scott, who flees to pursue his own vengeance, whilst Goldmember commandeers the tractor beam’s controls, unzipping his pants to reveal his gold-covered genitals to be a spare key. Goldmember activates the tractor beam, but Austin and Dr. Evil work together to reverse its polarity, destroying the meteor and saving the world. The heroes arrest Goldmember, who turns to the camera to reveal the entire string of events was adapted into a film by Steven Spielberg, starring Tom Cruise as Austin, Kevin Spacey as Dr. Evil, Danny DeVito as Mini-Me, and John Travolta as Goldmember. Austin, Foxxy, Dr. Evil, Mini-Me and Nigel are in the audience of a Hollywood theater watching the film. Upon exiting the theater they run into Fat Bastard, now thinner but flabby, thanks to the Subway diet. As Austin and Foxxy kiss, in Dr. Evil’s Hollywood lair, Scott – now completely bald, dressed like and laughing in a manner similar to his father — declares he will get his revenge on Austin and begins dancing like Michael Jackson.The third is fantastic… funny, disgusting, clever and uplifting! Mini-Me and Fat Bastard are back with even better gags and the usual crude humour from the latter!!! But Mike Myers has triumphed in adding the hilarious dutch roller skating villain “Goldmember!” And the casting of Michael Cane as Nigel Powers, Austins father… or farja if you’re Goldmember… is excellent!

REVIEW: THE LAST WITCH HUNTER

CAST

Vin Diesel (Fast & Furious)
Rose Leslie (Game of Thrones)
Elijah Wood (Lord of The Rings)
Michael Caine (The Dark Knight)
Ólafur Darri Ólafsson (The Deep)
Julie Engelbrecht (The Red Baron)
Rena Owen (A.I.)
Isaach de Bankolé (Chocolat)
Lotte Verbeek (The Borgias)
Dawn Olivieri (American Hustle)
Inbar Lavi (House of DUst)
Aimee Carrero (Devil’s Due)
Bex Taylor-Klaus (Arrow)
Joseph Gilgun (Lockout)

Eight hundred years ago, the Witch Queen unleashed the Black Plague to wipe out humanity. A band of knights, including a widowed Kaulder, whose family had died in the plague, storm her lair and in the ensuing battle, Kaulder manages to defeat her. Before dying, the Witch Queen cursed Kaulder with eternal life.In the present day, Kaulder prevents a teenage witch from unintentionally destroying an airplane with weather controlling runes stored in her luggage. Kaulder is revealed to be working as a witch hunter for the Order of the Axe and Cross, an organisation which aims to keep the truce between humans and witches (allowing witches to live freely providing they do not use magic on humans) and either executes or imprisons the witches who break the law. He is aided by a priest called “Dolan”, a tradition carried from the first priest who fought in the battle to destroy the Witch Queen.The 36th Dolan tells Kaulder that he is retiring from his duties and has chosen a new Dolan for him. The former apparently dies in his sleep that night. Kaulder and the 37th Dolan deduce that 36 was murdered by a witch. While tracking down the witch, Kaulder finds traces of old dark magic, not seen since before he killed the Queen. It is revealed that 36 is not dead but, rather, under a dark magic spell that can only be broken if the witch that cast it is killed.Using clues that 36 left behind, Kaulder goes to a witch bar, owned by Chloe and Miranda, to buy a memory spell to help him remember how he died and came back. Chloe eventually agrees to perform the spell. During the process of reliving Kaulder’s memory, the bar is attacked by a witch, the same one who cursed the 36th Dolan. He later attacks Chloe at her apartment, though Kaulder saves her by pulling her through a portal into his own apartment. Dolan the 37th and Kaulder work together to determine the hostile witch’s name – Baltasar Ketola, though he goes by the name Belial. Shortly after, Kaulder convinces Chloe to try to make him another memory potion, but since Belial destroyed her stash at her club, she needs to visit Miranda’s warehouse. After it is discovered that the plant they are there for hasn’t sprouted yet and the rest stolen by Belial, Kaulder and Chloe discover Miranda’s body as Belial taunts them through Miranda’s phone. Chloe immediately agree to help Kaulder get what he needs to kill Belial.In order to get the rare ingredient to create another memory spell, they visit another witch, Danique. However, Danique casts an endless memory spell on Kaulder, planning to entrap him in his dream forever. Chloe, revealed to be a dream-walker, is able to enter his trance and free his mind and the pair escape. Kaulder asks Chloe to enter his mind and pull out the memory. He discovers that, though the Queen’s body burned to ash, the first Dolan chose to spare the Queen’s heart, having realised Kaulder’s immortality is tied to the Queen’s heart, which if destroyed, would cause Kaulder to lose his immortality or die completely. They deduce that the 36th Dolan was attacked because he knew of where the heart was hidden and was tortured into revealing its location. They also realize that Belial’s real plan is to revive the Queen. Leaving Chloe and the 37th Dolan behind, Kaulder goes to face Belial and the Queen to prevent her from returning. Though he kills Belial in a confrontation, Belial had already revived the Queen, who then steals back Kaulder’s immortality. The 36th Dolan, who is recovering, encourages Kaulder to continue fighting.The members of the Witch Council, who guard the Witches’ Prison, are killed and the Queen plans to release another plague curse using the imprisoned witches as a coven, since even the Witch Queen isn’t powerful enough to cast it alone. Using her dream walking ability, Chloe manages to kill one of the weakest prisoners, severing the connection of the Queen to the prisoners and temporarily stalling her plan. Kaulder fights the Queen, and appears close to killing her, until the 37th Dolan attacks him, revealing he is the non-magical son of witches who Kaulder killed when he was five years old. He asks the Queen to give him magical powers. She states that despite her power, “clay cannot be turned to gold” and kills him, before turning to Chloe and linking her mind to complete the connections between the witches for the plague curse to form again. Kaulder manages to summon lightning to his sword (using the weather runes he confiscated from the young witch on the plane) and throws his sword into the Queen, burning her to ash. Kaulder prepares to kill both the Queen’s heart and himself; but Chloe dissuades him, stating that there were things in the darkness worse than the Witch Queen that he needs to continue fighting. The 36th Dolan agrees to delay his retirement and stay by Kaulder’s side. Chloe does as well, and the three form a new team, free from the Axe and Cross. The heartbeat of the Queen is heard within Kaulder’s weapon stash in his apartment.The last witch Hunter is a action pact movie  If you like movies that have action, adventure, and fantasy you should watch this movie.