REVIEW: FANBOYS

CAST
Dan Fogler (Balls of Fury)
Jay Baruchel (Robocop)
Kristen Bell (Frozen)
Sam Huntington (Superman Returns)
Chris Marquette (The Girl Next Door)
David Denman (Big Fish)
Christopher McDonald (Happy Gilmore)
Seth Rogen (Bad neighbours)
Danny Trejo (Machete 1 & 2)
Ethan Suplee (My Name Is Earl)
Joe Lo Truglio (Superbad)
Billy Dee Williams (Batman)
Jaime King (Sin City)
William Shatner (Free Enterprise)
Carrie Fisher (Star Wars)
Kevin Smith (Clerks)
Jason Mewes (Bottoms Up)
Ray Park (Heroes)
Will Forte (The Lego Movie)
Craig Robinson (This is the End)
Danny McBride (Land of The Lost)
On October 31, 1998, Eric Bottler reunites with his old high school buddies Linus, Hutch, Windows, and Zoe at a Halloween party. There is tension between Bottler and his old friends, due to Bottler being the only one that matured since high school. Bottler, now a car salesman at his father’s dealership, finds that his friends have not changed a bit since high school: the number one thing they still have in common is their love of Star Wars. The gang expresses their anticipation for the latest installment to the franchise, Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace. Linus proposes an idea that Bottler and he had been plotting since they were children, to infiltrate Skywalker Ranch and steal a rough cut of the film, but Bottler dismisses it.
The next day, Hutch and Windows meet Bottler at work and inform him that Linus is dying from cancer. The doctors estimate that he only has roughly four months to live; Episode I comes out in six. To make peace with his former best friend, Bottler decides to go through with their plan and infiltrate Skywalker Ranch. The four begin their trip to Texas, where they have to meet Rogue Leader, a girl Windows is having an online relationship with, for information on getting into the Ranch. While on the road, Hutch decides to take a detour to Riverside, Iowa (the future birthplace of Captain James T. Kirk) in an attempt to start a fight with some Trekkies. Hutch gets his wish after attacking a Trekkie by the name of Admiral Seasholtz in retaliation to Seasholtz calling Han Solo a bitch, to which Hutch responds by running down their statue of Captain Kirk and Khan.
The boys’ van breaks down and they stumble upon a biker bar. Once inside they ask for help and a glass of water that costs $100. Hutch, refusing to pay, tries to pass himself off as a tough guy who just got out of prison, only to discover that they are in a gay bar. In order to pay for the drink they are forced to become the “midnight entertainment” and strip to the music of Menudo, which goes terribly wrong when Hutch displays his one testicle. They are saved by a man named “The Chief,” who fixes their van after they pass out from eating guacamole laced with peyote. He gives a bag of it to Linus as a parting gift.
After arriving in Texas, Windows meets Rogue Leader, who to his horror is a 10-year-old girl. The group is then assaulted by her uncle, Harry Knowles, who beats up Windows and tells him to never talk to his niece again. After explaining their situation, Harry quizzes them to prove they are true fanboys, then gives them information on one of his contacts that knows how to successfully enter Skywalker Ranch. They are told to meet Harry’s contact in Las Vegas, but on their way there they are arrested for fleeing a police vehicle and possession of peyote. Zoe arrives to bail them out of jail, and – having traveled halfway across the country to get them – insists on accompanying them on their journey. Eric is reluctant to continue when the judge (Billy Dee Williams) gives him a message from his father to come home or lose his job, but the others convince him to carry on by calling the journey their “Death Star”, the one great thing that will live with them forever. Once in Vegas, Hutch and Windows attempt to have sex with some girls while Bottler and Linus go to meet Harry’s contact. They are shocked to find that his contact is none other than William Shatner, who gives them the information they need and leaves. As they leave they are attacked by Seasholtz and his Trekkie friends, who were attending a Star Trek convention in the same hotel. Meanwhile, Hutch and Windows discover that the girls they were with are escort girls and flee when their angry pimp wants them to pay up.
The group escapes their adversaries but Linus is injured in the process. When taken to the hospital, Linus is informed by a doctor (Carrie Fisher) that he must return home for the sake of his health. When the group feels the situation has become hopeless, Eric refuses to give up on their plan and manages to inspire the gang to continue, reminding them that Star Wars means very much not just to Linus, but to all of them. The group leaves the hospital and eventually makes it to Skywalker Ranch. Shortly after breaking into the ranch and marveling at the collection of original props and costumes used in the films, they are discovered by security guards and are caught after a brief chase. The Head of Security tells them of their impending doom when he receives a phone call from George Lucas himself. Lucas tells him that he will drop all charges if they can prove to him that they are “fanboys”. The five are individually quizzed, including questions designed to show that they do not know much about the opposite sex (of which only Zoe is able to answer), after which the Head of Security confirms that they are fanboys and Lucas drops all charges. Being aware of Linus’s illness, Lucas allows him to watch the film alone while his friends wait outside. After the film ends, Bottler joins his friends around a campfire and mends his friendship with Linus. Weeks later, Linus dies of his illness.
MV5BMTY5Mzk2ODU0N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTYzOTAyNw@@._V1_SY1000_CR0,0,1438,1000_AL_
On May 19, 1999, Bottler, Windows and Zoe emerge from their tent they used to camp out in while waiting in line for the first showing of Episode I. Bottler has followed his and Linus’s dream by becoming a comic book artist, Hutch has finally started his own detailing business, and Windows and Zoe are now in a relationship. Hutch arrives at the theater with beers he smuggled in, which they use to toast Linus’s memory. Just before the film starts, Bottler comments, “What if it sucks?”
This is a fun romp  and has surprisingly great cameos. Some movies are timeless in the way you can run into it on cable and will stay for a bit that is this movie. The actors throughout the movie are from the genre we expect. Cameos and more cameos are numerous. A good film for fans of Star Wars.

REVIEW: THE SPIRIT

CAST

Gabriel Macht (S.W.A.T.: Firefight)
Scarlett Johanson (Lucy)
Samuel L. Jackson (Avengers Assemble)
Eva Mendes (2 Fast 2 Furious)
Sarah Paulson (American Horror Story)
Dan Lauria (The Wonder Years)
Stana Katic (Castle)
Louis Lombardi (Natural Born Killers)
Jaime King (My Bloody Valentine)
Paz Vega (Burning Palms)
Eric Balfour (Skyline)
Johnny Simmons (Boogeyman 2)
Seychelle Gabriel (Honey 2)
Michael Milhoan (That 70s Show)

MV5BNjE2Mjc3ODQ0OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwODE1NDYyMw@@._V1_SY1000_CR0,0,1490,1000_AL_In a cat-filled mausoleum in Central City, Denny Colt, also known as The Spirit, receives a call from Detective Sussman about a major case that could involve the Spirit’s arch-nemesis, The Octopus. The Spirit dons his costume and travels across rooftops while delivering a voice-over soliloquy about the city being his one true love. A woman (Kimberly Cox) is being mugged in an alley below. He manages to save her, receiving a knife wound that he barely seems to notice. The woman asks, “What are you?”, with an arriving officer answering, “That’s The Spirit”. The Spirit runs away, catching a ride from Officer Liebowitz and heading toward the flats.
MV5BMTU0NzYyMjEyNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDg3NjQwMg@@._V1_At the swampland, femme fatale Sand Saref rises from the water and appears to shoot Sussman multiple times. The Spirit and Liebowitz find the wounded Sussman, but a flashback reveals that it was really the Octopus who shot him in an effort to recover two identical chests underwater. Sand and her husband Mahmoud tried to flee with both chests, but the Octopus wounded Mahmoud and snapped a line connecting the two chests. Sand escaped, leaving one chest behind, which the Octopus retrieved from the murky depths.
MV5BNjkxNjU0ODU2NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMjI1NDYyMw@@._V1_SY1000_CR0,0,1510,1000_AL_After the Octopus kills Liebowitz, he sends away his cloned henchmen, Ethos, Pathos, and Logos, to take on the Spirit alone. His accomplice Silken Floss drives up, running over Pathos in the process. She departs with the cargo as the two arch-nemeses fight. Cutting to the next morning, The Spirit is awakened by his lover Dr. Ellen Dolan, daughter of the Police Commissioner. Appearing to be in perfect health despite his gunshot wounds, the Spirit is shocked to notice a gold locket in Sussman’s hand; a piece torn from Sand Saref’s neck earlier.
MV5BMTk4MTA3MjE1Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzc3NjQwMg@@._V1_Saref’s locket contains pictures of a much-younger Denny Colt and Sand; the two grew up together in Central City where Denny bought Sand the locket as a gift to satisfy her love of “shiny things”. They lived happily until Sand’s father, a police officer, was shot dead by a criminal with whom Colt’s uncle was involved. Sand, now disenchanted with the city and its corruption, fled to Europe and has not been heard from for fifteen years. In a secret lair, the Octopus and Silken Floss open their stolen chest, but discover that it does not contain the mysterious Blood of Heracles as expected but the Golden Fleece, and decide a trade is in order.
MV5BMTMwOTU0ODQwN15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNDM2NjAxNQ@@._V1_SX1777_CR0,0,1777,998_AL_Sand and Mahmoud visit the office of a high-class fence named Donenfeld, whom Sand paid to locate the underwater treasure. It is implied that Donenfeld gave up the treasure’s location to the Octopus to ensure his family’s safety. At Alice’s Hospital, the Spirit has fully regenerated and is as good as new; Commissioner Dolan angrily enters with young rookie cop Morgenstern and calls the Spirit away to a case.
MV5BMTgxMDAwMzg1OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTg3NjQwMg@@._V1_Sand’s history as one of the world’s great jewel thieves is relayed to the Spirit. As the Spirit is about to arrest her, he is caught off-guard by her standing before him fully nude. Sand doesn’t recognize the Spirit as the presumed-dead Denny. She is stunned when he reveals his knowledge of her looking for the Golden Fleece and she shoves the Spirit through a window, only to see him survive the fall.
MV5BMTk5NTUzODMzM15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwOTkxNzMwMg@@._V1_After his run-in with Sand, the Spirit receives a tip on the location of the Octopus’s lair. In the process of breaking in he is captured and tied to a dentist’s chair. The Octopus reveals his own origin as well as how he and the Spirit became arch-enemies: Octopus and Floss’s experimentation have led to the creation of a serum (something of a scientific equivalent to the Elixir of Life) that could grant immortality. The Octopus first tested it on the dead body of the murdered officer Colt, who came back from the dead; his resurrection has earned the ire of Death, being the only man to ever wrongfully escape her clutches. Contacting Dolan, the only one aware of his true identity, he vowed to become the city’s protector, “her spirit”. Eventually, the Octopus injected himself and arch-enemies were born. However, the Octopus needs the blood of Heracles, a demi-god, to perfect the serum’s formula. The Spirit manages to escape by spontaneously seducing a belly-dancing female assassin named Plaster of Paris, who as a parting gift turns on The Octopus in favor of The Spirit’s charms.
MV5BMTgxMDAwMzg1OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTg3NjQwMg@@._V1_Outside in an alley, The Spirit irks Paris by mentioning Sand’s name; she stabs him out of spite. After being unconscious for a period of time, the Spirit stumbles to the city docks and collapses into the cold water, where he confronts the ethereal Angel of Death, Lorelei Rox, who has haunted his sleep. While at first he is willing to finally give in to her embrace, he escapes her yet again when he manages to gather his senses by remembering Ellen, Sand, Floss, Paris, and the other women he claims to see in place of his life flashing before his eyes. As the Spirit swims to the surface, Lorelei vows that he will be hers eventually.
MV5BMjAwNjI3Nzc1NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTAyNzMwMg@@._V1_At the projects, Sand and her latest henchman fly in with the Blood of Heracles to meet Floss and a clone carrying the Golden Fleece. After a four-way Mexican standoff, Sand attempts to convince Floss to get out of serving the Octopus before she is killed by the Octopus himself. The clone kills Sand’s henchman and the Octopus asks Floss for the vase. As the Spirit suddenly materializes, Floss drives off, unable to take a side. The Octopus unloads with progressively bigger guns on the Spirit, apparently killing him off, but Dolan’s SWAT team storms the area and opens fire right after. Morgenstern blows the Octopus’ arm up with a hand-cannon and Dolan shoots him several times on the head. To recover from the damage, the Octopus gets to the Blood of Heracles and prepares to drink it, but Sand shoots the vase just in time as the Spirit rises, having worn a bullet-proof vest. He then attaches a grenade to the Octopus’ chest, blowing him up into pieces with Sand protecting the two of them with the Golden Fleece.
MV5BMTgzOTM0MDY5M15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwODQwNjIwMg@@._V1_Showdown over, the Spirit gives Sand her locket back. They kiss as Ellen looks on, feeling betrayed. The old flames bid each other goodbye and the Spirit convinces Dolan to let Sand go in gratitude for saving him and the world. Nearby, Floss discovers one of the Octopus’s severed fingers crawling towards her; she picks it up and departs with two of the clones saying, “We’ll start from scratch”. Meanwhile, the Spirit and Ellen make amends and embrace. The final shot shows the Spirit standing triumphant on a rooftop with his cat, looking over the city as the sun rises.MV5BMjEzMjU0MjUzOV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwODk1OTc0MTE@._V1_SX1500_CR0,0,1500,999_AL_This film is worth a watch, but don’t take it too seriously. It may have been made by the people that did Sin City and 300 but this film has it’s tongue firmly in cheek. It has some laugh out moments, and it looks fantastic, However, the story is weak and the characters undeveloped enough for me. Scarlett Johanson is amazing as usual, and as she states in the film – looks fantastic. Samuel L Jackson overacts throughout the film, as usual. It’s worth a watch, but not really worth watching twice in my opinion.

REVIEW: MY BLOODY VALENTINE (2009)

CAST

Jensen Ackles (Supernatural)
Jaime King (Sin City)
Kerr Smith (Final Destination)
Betsy Rue (Halloween II)
Ed Gathegi (X-Men: First Class)
Tom Atkins (Halloween III)
Kevin Tighe (Lost)
Megan Boone (The Blacklist)
Marc Macaulay (Swamp Thing: The Series)

On the Valentine’s Day of 1997, in a small town, a cave-in on the north side of a Hanninger mine trapped six miners. Six days later, rescue teams found five dead miners and the comatose Harry Warden (Richard John Walters), who survived by killing the other miners with a pickaxe, allowing himself to breathe. Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles) the owner’s son, was blamed for the mine disaster because he forgot to vent the methane lines and caused a cave-in, but also Harry Warden for killing the miners.
A year later, Valentine’s Day, Warden wakes from his coma in the hospital, and goes on a murderous rampage. Soon after, Sheriff Burke (Tom Atkins) arrives, finding multiple mutilated bodies many of which have been severed in half and the heart of a nurse inside a candy box. Burke and his partner come to the conclusion that Warden had awoken from his coma and, realizing they don’t have much time left, they try to figure out where he’s headed. Meanwhile, at the abandoned mine shaft that was the site of the disaster, a party is in full swing, attended by many teens, including Axel Palmer (Kerr Smith), his girlfriend, Irene (Betsy Rue), Tom Hanniger and his girlfriend, Sarah (Jaime King). Tom was initially reluctant to go, but he goes anyway. He leaves Sarah and goes back to his car to pick up some beers before going inside.

Sarah goes alone and gets lost looking for Axel and Irene. She runs across a teen and a few seconds later, he is stabbed through his eye. She is confronted by Warden in full miner’s garb, carrying a bloody pickaxe, and she flees, finding several dead bodies. Axel grabs her and they, along with Irene, hide from the killer. Warden eventually sees the trio, and they run out of the mine, meeting Tom as he comes in. Warden hits Tom with the pickaxe, injuring him, while the other three run for the car. Sarah tries to go back for Tom but Warden throws a pickaxe into the windshield of Axel’s truck, just an inch away from stabbing Sarah in the eye. Axel, realizing he has no other choice starts up his truck and leaves Tom behind. Warden turns his attention towards Tom, who runs back into the mine in an attempt to escape from him. Before Tom can be killed, Burke and his partner arrive and shoot Warden, who makes his getaway back into the mine. Tom also appears shocked by the events.  Ten years later, in 2008, Tom’s father, from whom Tom has been estranged, dies and Tom inherits the mine. Tom returns to town after his father’s funeral to sell the mine, having vanished since the incident; it was unknown where he was, since he was devastated by the events and unable to see Axel and Sarah after they had abandoned him in the mine to die. Axel is now sheriff and married to Sarah and they have a son, but he is cheating on her with Megan (Megan Boone), who works with Sarah at Sarah’s grocery store.

After Megan and Axel have sex at his family’s old house in the woods, Megan gives Axel a Valentine’s Day card and a box of candy and tells him that she is pregnant with his child. Meanwhile, at the motel where Tom is staying, Irene is having sex with a local trucker named Frank (Todd Farmer). After they finish, Frank reveals that he has been filming her. Irene goes out completely naked and angry about the events, drawing a gun on him. After he reveals that the gun is empty, she throws it and hits him, but he ignores her. Just as he enters the truck, he is impaled with a pickaxe through the head by a man in full miner garb, face completely covered by his mask. The killer chases Irene through the motel, but she hides under the bed. The noise draws Selene (Selene Luna), the midget motel owner, into the room, and the miner kills her by impaling her whole body through the head on the lights above. Irene makes a noise and is discovered by the killer, who removes the bed mattress and stabs her to death. Axel is called to the scene of the crime, and finds Irene cut open, her heart missing; he also discovers Tom’s name on the register of people staying at the motel.

He returns to his office, where he sees a video of the miner following Irene. Axel and his partner Martin talk about how it can’t be Warden, despite the rumors. Then Axel receives a candy box with Irene’s heart inside, just like Warden had done with the nurse ten years ago. Meanwhile, Tom is visiting his newly inherited mine. In the mine, the killer traps Tom in a cage while William “Red” Kirkpatrick (Jeff Hochendoner) is calling for Ben, who is an old friend of the Hannigers. ‘Warden’ proceeds to murder Red and a group of miners show up seconds later. Suspicion falls on Tom, despite the fact that he was locked in a cage the entire time. At the hospital afterwards, Axel asks Burke what happened to the killer. Burke says that he and Ben Foley (Kevin Tighe), the mine manager, killed and buried Warden. But when Axel, Tom, and Sarah accompany them to the burial spot, Warden’s body is no longer there. Later on, Foley is at his house when he hears a noise. He goes outside with a shotgun to find nobody there, but when he goes back inside he is attacked by ‘Warden’, who knocks him down and impales his head with the pickaxe. The police find his body at the burial spot with his chest cut open. Axel, angry about the events, orders a police guard on his home to protect his son.Meanwhile, Sarah is with Megan at the store when ‘Warden’ arrives. He chases them through the store, but they lock themselves in the office. The window is locked, but Megan finds the key while Sarah is blocking the door with a table. Just as ‘Warden’ breaks a hole in the door and unlocks it, Megan goes through the window and Sarah, who is right behind her, turns around and notices that ‘Warden’ has disappeared from the office door. She quickly tries to pull Megan back into the office, knowing that ‘Warden’ is going to the outside window but she’s too late, as ‘Warden’ arrives outside and grabs Megan. Sarah runs back through the store and encounters Axel outside. They find Megan’s mutilated body in the alley with the message “Be Mine 4 Ever” scrawled in blood on the wall above. Sarah ponders why Megan was killed when she had no relation to the mine. Sarah comes to the conclusion that the killer was trying to get at Axel, and she admits she knew about their affair. Axel then sends her to the hospital. Meanwhile, at Axel and Sarah’s home, their son Noah is watching TV with his babysitter Rosa (Joy de la Paz), while Deputy Ferris (Karen Baum) is in the squad car watching the premises. Suddenly, ‘Warden’ arrives and impales Rosa with the pickaxe and throws her into the washing machine, scalding her. Burke arrives and warns Ferris about ‘Warden’s’ presence.

Ferris goes to check the house, while Burke is at the porch. Ferris finds Noah and warns him to hide, and she finds Rosa’s mutilated body in the washing machine. She warns Burke, but he is killed by ‘Warden’. Meanwhile, Sarah is in the hospital and Tom calls her and convinces her that Warden is not the killer. He tells her that he needs her to trust him as he has found something he needs to show her. On the road Tom tries to convince Sarah that Axel is the killer. Axel calls Sarah while she and Tom are in the car; Axel tells her that Tom has been in a mental hospital for the last seven years since Harry Warden’s rampage and that he is the killer.

Shocked, Sarah attempts to get Tom to drive her home and, when he refuses, she grabs the wheel and crashes Tom’s car. Tom is knocked out momentarily and Sarah escapes. She calls Axel and he instructs her to go to his father’s old house. When she enters she finds hundreds of candy heart boxes and her old picture with Tom. The killer, confirming that he is not Warden, appears. Sarah distracts him and runs into the mine shaft where the original murders took place. She runs into Axel and steals his gun. Pointing the gun at Axel she asks him about the hundreds of candy boxes. He seems confused and blames Tom. Tom then appears and Sarah points the gun at him too. Both men accuse the other of being the killer.
Tom gives himself away when he points out that the message over Megan’s dead body (“Be Mine 4 Ever”) was the same as what Megan wrote to Axel in the Valentine card, revealing that he knows Megan is dead which is information that only Axel and Sarah knew. Tom begins to hallucinate when what seems to be Warden appears in the mine with them. Tom tries to warn Sarah but Axel points his flashlight into the area that Tom is pointing to and shakes his head no, she tells him that nothing is there. Warden walks right up to Tom then disappears. A montage then plays out all the murders in the film again, revealing Tom to be the true killer. Sarah tells Tom that Harry isn’t there with them, to which Axel replies “Oh, he’s here, aren’t you Harry? You living inside Tom?” Tom turns to him, smirks, and says, “Oh, I’m right here”. This also reveals that Tom has developed a split personality: as himself and as Harry Warden. Axel is infuriated and grabs the pickaxe, rushing at Tom. The two fight, Axel gains the upper hand and knocks Tom onto the ground, but Tom injures him with the pickaxe. Tom runs off and Sarah and Axel try to hide. Tom comes and finds them, smashing out lights with the pickaxe as he goes. As each light goes out, Tom flashes between being him, and being the miner. Sarah shoots Tom through his side and the bullet hits a gas tank, causing an explosion that causes the mine to collapse.

Rescue teams enter the mine, searching for the survivors. One lone rescuer finds Tom, barely conscious and covered in debris and planks of wood. He tells Tom not to worry, help is coming, when Tom suddenly grabs his pickaxe and impales the rescuer through his mask. Sarah and Axel get out, and Axel is taken away in an ambulance while Sarah is taken by Martin. Then a miner holding his injured side is seen leaving the mine. It is revealed to be Tom as he takes off the mask and walks away.Overall My Bloody Valentine, delivers an entertaining ride through dark alleys, mine shafts and the evil minds of writers Todd Farmer and Zane Smith. Slightly on the lighter side of the horror genre this film develops enough jump scares, with the help of three dimensional effects to deliver a fun and fast 101 minutes. See this one with a friend and laugh out loud when a 20′ branch comes screaming at your head (and try not to duck)!

 

25 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS REVIEW: SILENT NIGHT

Starring

Malcolm McDowell (Star Trek: Generations)
Jaime King (The Spirit)
Donal Logue (Gotham)
Ellen Wong (The Circle)
Lisa Marie (Planet of The Apes)
Courtney-Jane White (The Lookout)
Cortney Palm (Zombeavers)
John B. Lowe (The Butterfly Effect)
Brendan Fehr (Roswell)
Ali Tataryn (Wrong Turn 4)

Rick Skene in Silent Night (2012)A mysterious man dresses in a Santa Claus suit, complete with a mask. Once dressed, “Santa” captures and kills Jordan (Brendan Fehr), a police officer in the small town of Cryer, Wisconsin. Jordan is sleeping with the married Alana Roach (Ali Tartaryn) and is electrocuted with Christmas lights in his home. The following day, Christmas Eve, the Sheriff of Cryer, Sheriff Cooper (Malcolm McDowell), calls Deputy Aubrey Bradimore (Jaime King) in on her day off when Jordan doesn’t arrive at work. Aubrey is a new addition to the police force, and is still reeling from the unexpected death of her husband John. She doesn’t think she’s a good officer as she is trying to live up to her father, who is a retired cop. Aubrey was going to spend the holiday with her parents but instead goes out to check on Jordan, finding his mangled body and Roach torn apart later in the day. Sheriff Cooper decides not to tell Mayor Revie (Tom Anniko) until the case is solved.Jaime King in Silent Night (2012)Meanwhile, the masked Santa killer goes on a murder spree, killing those who have done something he considers ‘naughty.’ His next victim is a bratty teenage girl who he kills with a taser, then he makes his way to the local motel, murdering a group of people during a softcore porn shoot. One woman manages to escape and tries to hide inside a Christmas Tree farm, but the killer chops off one of her legs and throws her feet-first into a woodchipper. Sheriff Cooper calls in Deputy Stanley Giles (Andrew Cecon) and goes out to find the killer himself, but comes back empty handed. Aubrey starts to suspect Santa Jim Epstein (Donal Logue), a local drunken Santa portrayer, drug dealer Stein Karsson (Mike O’Brian), and the perverted Reverend Madely (Curtis Moore).Rick Skene in Silent Night (2012)Aubrey attempts to interrogate Karrson, but he flees. Aubrey gives chase, but is nearly killed and only saved by Cooper. That evening, during the town’s annual Christmas parade, Aubrey searches for the killer, but is unable to identify him among a crowd of men dressed in Santa Claus suits, though she arrests Jim when he flees from her. The killer Santa continues on his spree, murdering Mayor Revie, his porn star daughter Tiffani (Courtney-Jane White), and her boyfriend Dennis (Erik J. Berg). The killer then arrives at the church and kills Reverend Madely for stealing donation money. Aubrey goes to Karrson’s motel room to arrest him, and is forced to kill him when he draws a gun.Rick Skene and Cortney Palm in Silent Night (2012)Aubrey notices a gift box that contains a piece of coal, and recalls that both the station and her father had received the same gift. Aubrey arrives at her parents’s home, only to find her father dead. Meanwhile, the killer attacks the station, killing Cooper, Giles, and Jim. Aubrey, along with the station secretary Brenda (Ellen Wong), are cornered by the killer inside the police station, where the killer tries to burn down the place with a homemade flamethrower. Aubrey is able to overpower the killer Santa and sets him on fire, but in the end he manages to escape.Rick Skene in Silent Night (2012)It is later revealed that the killer Santa is Ronald Jones Jr., owner of a local chimney cleaning and repair service, and he survived the flamethrower attack. During the hunt for the killer, Aubrey learns from another Santa portrayer that Ronald Sr. had crashed his ex-wife’s Christmas party many years ago, burning her alive with the homemade flamethrower. Aubrey’s father was the police officer that responded to the situation and gunned him down, only to find out that Ronald Jr. was in his father’s truck watching the entire time. The tragedy caused Ronald Jr. to go insane and seek revenge, dressing as Santa so he would not get caught during Cryer’s Christmas festivities.Rick Skene in Silent Night (2012)Now this is not a straight forward remake of SILENT NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT, but it does pay homage in a few scenes, if you remember how Linnea Quigley dies in the original you’ll know what i mean….its a solid film based on its own merit and storyline, some great gore and death scenes, and good acting by the most of the cast..unfortunately apart from Malcolm Mcdowell, who plays the sheriff, terrible dialogue and terrible acting, that was the only issue i had with it, because all round a great seasonal slasher, this will definitely be on the slasher/ horror list to watch every Christmas with all the rest,

REVIEW: BARELY LETHAL

CAST

Hailee Steinfeld (Ender’s Game)
Sophie Turner (Game of thrones)
Jessica Alba (Machete)
Samuel L. Jackson (Snakes on a Plane)
Dove Cameron (Descendants)
Thomas Mann (Project X)
Rob Huebel (Life As We Know It)
Toby Sebastian (The Hollow Crown)
Gabriel Basso (Super 8)
Jaime King (Bulletproof Monk)
Rachael Harris (The Hangover)
Alexandra Krosney (Last Man Standing)
Dan Fogler (Fantastic Beasts)
Steve-O (Jackass)
Nina Dobrev (The Vampire Diaries)
Emma Holzer (Spring Breakers)
Demetrius Bridges (The Duff)

TUJHTJTYJTYJTYJYTJThe young female orphans in the government-run Prescott Academy are trained to become assassins. Their number one rule, taught by trainer Hardman (Samuel L. Jackson), is “no attachments”. Agent 83 has top skills, which have made her rivals with Agent 84. 83 has always been curious about the world outside the Academy, brushing up on teen culture through popular magazines and watching movies and TV shows like Mean Girls and Beverly Hills, 90210.  Hardman assigns the agents to capture arms dealer Victoria Knox (Jessica Alba). Undercover in Chechnya, 83 poses as one of those captured and brought before Knox. She manages to latch herself and Knox onto Hardman’s passing jet but Knox pulls a knife and cuts the rope and 83 drops (into a river) as Knox is apprehended. 83 ignores comms calls causing Hardman to declare her MIA.barely-lethal-2-xlarge83 starts life as a regular teenager, adopting the name Megan Walsh and going through an exchange program to live with the Larson family. Mrs. Larson is kind, son Parker instantly likes Megan, but daughter Liz is cold and distant. Megan picks a ridiculous outfit for her first day of school and is laughed at and mocked at her first assembly, leaving both Megan and Liz embarrassed. Megan soon makes friends with a geeky kid named Roger, who has an interest in her. Megan is attracted to Cash, hacking the school’s system to make him her biology lab partner, to the ire of two mean girls. As retaliation, the girls convince Megan that Cash loves girls with school spirit and convince her to try out as the school mascot, for which she is the only contender. When kids from a rival school follow tradition and try to kidnap mascot Megan from a game she fights them off, with a video of her actions going viral. It earns her some popularity, while annoying Liz.barely-lethalMegan is apprehended by a Prescott agent and brought to Hardman. He assumes she is working with their enemies and tells his minion, Pedro, to torture Megan. He injects her with a truth serum and realizes she is honest when she says she only wanted to enjoy a normal life outside the Academy. Hardman lets her go, but warns her that if she gets into trouble, they won’t be there to bail her out. Megan and Liz both attend a big party at the home of the school’s class clown, Gooch. Megan hangs out with Cash, while Liz gets drunk with Gooch, learning that his real name is Bernard. To Megan’s surprise, 84 is there, calling herself Heather. Megan thinks Hardman sent Heather to shadow her, but Heather has her own plans, going after Cash to annoy Megan. Megan eventually wins Cash’s attention and gets asked by him to the homecoming dance.MV5BNTE0NjA4YmItMzFmNy00Zjc0LTllMmQtZDA4NDkyMDJiYTYwXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMzU5NjU1MDA@__V1_Megan is waiting for the school bus the next morning, and is surprised to see that Hardman is driving, only passing through to warn Megan that Knox has escaped from the Academy. Liz drives Megan to school, but they are pursued by a masked assassin. Megan steers them away from danger while telling Liz her secret. Megan crashes their car, crashing out the assassin as well. The assassin escapes, but Megan recognizes the smell of Ke$ha perfume, deducing that Heather was their attacker.Barely-Lethal-Trailer-TwoAt the homecoming dance, Megan realizes that Cash is a boring person and dumps him. She goes to apologize to Roger, but finds out that his date is Heather, who provokes a fight with Megan. Their fight rambles through the hallways and into the school’s kitchen. Heather reveals she joined Knox’s operation in order to get a chance to kill Megan. Liz sneaks up on Heather and stabs her in the leg with a skewer from a corndog. Megan then uses a frying pan and hits Heather in the head knocking her unconscious and she falls to the floor. The girls return home to find that Knox and some models have taken Parker and Mrs. Larson. Megan fights the goons but Liz gets captured as well. Knox reveals that she was Prescott Agent 1, but she left and turned against them. Hardman shows up with reinforcements and defeats Knox and her goons. Megan uses a Prescott helicopter to stop Roger, who is driving home with his father. She tells Roger her true feelings for him and they kiss. In a mid-credits scene, Heather is in a car with one of Knox’s former minions. She stares at a photo of Megan on a tablet and orders him to find out where she is going to college.v1Believe it or not, this movie is really fun. You gotta give it a chance to truly appreciate it. I went in not expecting anything and I honestly enjoyed it.

REVIEW: MOTHER’S DAY (2010)

CAST

Rebecca De Mornay (Jessica Jones)
Jaime King (Sin City)
Patrick Flueger (The Princess Diaries)
Frank Grillo (The Purge: Election Year)
Warren Kole (The Following)
Briana Evigan (Sorority Row)
Deborah Ann Woll (Daredevil)
Lisa Marcos (King’s Ransom)
Matt O’Leary (The Lone Ranger)
Lyriq Bent (Saw II)
Tony Nappo (Knockaround Guys)
Kandyse McClure (Hemlock Grove)
Shawn Ashmore (Conviction)
Alexa Vega (Machete Kills)
A.J. Cook (Final Destination 2)
Andrew Bryniarski (Street Fighter)
Lloyd Kaufman (Tromeo and Juliet)

Rebecca De Mornay in Mother's Day (2010)An unknown woman enters a maternity ward and, with help from an accomplice, steals a newborn baby, Terry (J. Larose) one of the guards catches them in the act but ends up being stabbed to death. Beth Sohapi (Jaime King) is having a birthday party for her husband, Daniel Sohapi (Frank Grillo) with the help of their friends, married couple Treshawn (Lyriq Bent) and Gina Jackson (Kandyse McClure); Dave Lowe (Tony Nappo) and his fiancee, Annette Langston (Briana Evigan); George Barnum (Shawn Ashmore) and his girlfriend, Melissa McGuire (Jessie Rusu); and Daniel’s co worker, and friend, Julie Ross (Lisa Marcos). The news reports a tornado is heading their way; Daniel assures his guests that the basement is tornado proof.Briana Evigan and Lisa Marcos in Mother's Day (2010)After a bank robbery gone wrong, three brothers, eldest and leader Ike (Patrick Flueger), irrational and irresponsible Addley (Warren Kole) and Johnny (Matt O’Leary), who has been badly injured, are on the run from the law. They reach their mother’s house only to find it unrecognizable. Daniel and Beth, hearing noise upstairs, leave the basement party only to find the brothers holding them hostage within their home at gunpoint. Terrified, Beth offers the brothers the help of George, a doctor, who begins to tend to Johnny’s injuries. Addley forces Beth and Daniel downstairs, trapping all the party-goers in the basement at gunpoint. Ike calls his sister Lydia (Deborah Ann Woll), who informs him that she and their mother lost the house and will be on their way to help the boys.Matt O'Leary, Patrick John Flueger, and Warren Kole in Mother's Day (2010)A short time later, an RV arrives with Lydia and Mother (Rebecca De Mornay) with Lydia rushing to Johnny’s side, showing she only has compassion for him. Mother becomes very angry at Ike for losing the emergency phone they use to contact one another, telling him she was unable to alert him of losing the house. Realizing the gravity of the situation, Mother arranges help to sneak over the border into Canada, however it will cost ten thousand dollars. She learns of her sons sending money to the house which she never received, before going into the basement. Mother is initially nice to the hostages, explaining to them that no one has to get hurt. She confronts Beth and Daniel about the money, however both deny knowing about it. Mother believes Beth, however she has Addley and Ike torture Daniel for information. Just then Melissa attempts to escape, only to be shot by Addley. Mother strikes Addley for his behavior then takes the cellphones, bank cards and pin numbers of the others and makes Ike take Beth to a cash machine to collect the money. Meanwhile, Mother informs George to keep Johnny alive, or they will all die, with Lydia told to help George and Johnny.Rebecca De Mornay and Jaime King in Mother's Day (2010)A police officer (Mike O’Brien) arrives after the three suspects of the bank robbery are identified as the old residents of the house. Daniel assures the officer everything is fine and he leaves, alerting Mother of Daniel’s lying skills. She further becomes suspicious after Lydia discovers a Valentine’s card from Daniel to Julie, as well as photographs and newspaper articles of a child killed in a car accident.Rebecca De Mornay in Mother's Day (2010)Ike and Beth dispose of Melissa’s body behind a dumpster, where she is soon found to be alive by two sanitation workers who rush her to a hospital. While at the ATM, Beth and Ike encounter two party girls, Vicky Rice (A. J. Cook) and Jenna Luther (Alexa Vega), who Ike quickly kills after they realize he has a gun. The pair travel to Treshawn’s laundromat business to take money out of the safe, where Beth attempts to escape but fails. They later encounter the police officer who Ike also kills. Back at the house, George realizes Mother has been lying to Lydia about a rare skin condition and tries to convince her to help his friends, but Mother sends Lydia away. Johnny, now in critical condition, has to be resuscitated by Lydia and George when he goes into cardiac arrest, telling his mother he doesn’t want to die a virgin. Mother forces Treshawn and Dave to fight over which one of their partners will be forced to have sex with Johnny. Dave loses and Annette is forced upstairs. However Johnny’s injuries prove too severe to rape Annette and she is forced back into the basement by Addley. Dave attacks Addley, resulting in Addley accidentally shooting Dave in the face, killing him. Gina takes the opportunity to try and escape, however is brought back to the house by Daniel in order to save Beth.Rebecca De Mornay, Briana Evigan, Frank Grillo, and Lisa Marcos in Mother's Day (2010)In the basement, Mother informs Gina that disobedience has consequences, before pouring boiling water over Treshawn. Mother then attempts to find her money by burning the photographs of the boy, revealed to be Daniel and Beth’s deceased son. Mother then sets Julie’s hair on fire, but extinguishes it when she realizes Daniel is telling the truth about the money. Mother leaves the basement, before the group manage to arm themselves with knives. They lure Addley into the basement and stab him to death. Treshawn, now deaf and having difficulty seeing, takes Addley’s gun and goes upstairs. Gina follows him, startling him and causing him to shoot her in the side. As Treshawn attempts to help his wife, Mother shoots him in the back, killing him. Mother discovers Addley’s body and phones Ike, before forcing Beth to listen to her shoot Daniel. Annette and Julie are then taken upstairs and tied up.Rebecca De Mornay and Warren Kole in Mother's Day (2010)At the hospital, Melissa regains consciousness and alerts authorities to the house. George confronts Mother, telling her that none of her kids look like one another, and look nothing like her. Mother, enraged, threatens to kill him, but Lydia convinces her that they need George. Ike and Beth then burst through the front door with the money, Ike heading downstairs to mourn his loss. Mother instructs Ike, Lydia and George to take Johnny to the RV while she has a chat with the ladies.Rebecca De Mornay and Jaime King in Mother's Day (2010)Inside the RV, Johnny hoping to please his mother and older brother shoots George in spite of Lydia’s pleas to let him live. Mother reveals to Julie and Annette that Beth was the one who hid the money and is the one responsible for all the deaths. Beth reveals that she was hiding the money for the baby she is expecting. She also reveals she knew Daniel was cheating on her with Julie, and wanted to leave him. Mother forces Beth to take a pregnancy test to prove it, before Beth knocks Mother unconscious. Beth unties Julie, who is shot in the head by Ike while trying to escape the house, and Annette, who hides with Beth in the garage. Together they manage to overpower Ike and kill him. Annette escapes to the neighbours, while Beth fights with Mother in the house. Beth is knocked unconscious and Mother sets the house on fire. However, Beth wakes up and overpowers Mother, hitting her with a wooden chopping board, before escaping the house along with Gina who has survived her injuries. Months later, a very pregnant Beth goes into labor and is taken to the hospital by Annette, Gina and Melissa. That night, Beth wakes up to the emergency alarms going off in the maternity ward. She gets up and goes to check on her baby, but the bassinette is empty. The film ends with Lydia, Johnny and Mother leaving the country in the RV with Beth’s baby.370ef5ce8af406af9c0a73fa325ddfd2--bad-barbie-barbie-funnyThe film is very brutal and there are quite a few unpleasant scenes so if you don’t like these kind of films you won’t like it. For horror fans though this is a well made and very watchable film which is as unpredictable as you could wish for.

 

REVIEW: BULLETPROOF MONK

CAST

Chow Yun-Fat (Crouching Tiger, Hiden Tiger)
Sean William Scott (American Pie)
Jaime King (Sin City)
Karel Roden (The Bourne Supremacy)
Victoria Smurfit (Dracula)
Mako (Conan The Barbarian)
Mike Dopud (Stargate Universe)

In 1943 Tibet, a Tibetan monk is informed that he has fulfilled the prophecies made of him (fighting for justice while cranes circled overhead, fighting for love under a palace of jade, and rescuing friends he never met with family he never knew he had) which include forgoing his name. He is then entrusted by his master with the protection of a Scroll which contains knowledge by which the reader becomes the most powerful of living things, a protection that will keep him youthful and immunize him to injury until, at the close of 60 years, he must pass the knowledge to an heir. The master, who has formerly been the guardian of this Scroll, is killed by German soldiers shortly after the transfer. His pupil, the now nameless Monk, escapes the Nazis.
Sixty years later, a young pickpocket named Kar robs a police officer. He is arrested, frees himself, and flees reinforcements. Above, the Nameless Monk notices several men attempt to capture him, and he escapes into the subway. He and Kar collide and cause a young girl to fall into the path of an oncoming train. Kar and the Nameless Monk rescue the girl, and the three escape; Kar leaves his bag of stolen goods in the station. The Nameless Monk and Kar introduce themselves and Kar steals the Scroll from the Nameless Monk and runs away. The Nameless Monk chases after Kar, whom he suspects may be a suitable successor, as cranes were visible far above their fight. Then fighting underground against a minor crime lord called Mister Funktastic, Kar meets a young woman named Jade, with whom he falls in love. The Nameless Monk follows Kar home and watches him practice Kung-fu by mimicking Chinese martial arts films. The next day, Jade meets with Nina at the opening of a human rights exhibit. Later, the Monk and Kar meet again and are talking when Jade walks up to them and asks Kar to return her necklace, which he had stolen to earn her esteem. A group of mercenaries sent to kill the Nameless Monk interrupt them, and he flees with Kar.
The Nameless Monk and Kar hide beneath an Asian laundromat that houses several fellow monks, and the Nameless Monk shows Kar advanced combat techniques. They are attacked and the Scroll is taken to the employer of the mercenary forces, a crime lord named Strucker, who is revealed to be the Nazi commander. Upon reading the Scroll, Strucker realizes it is a fake; the true secret is tattooed on the Nameless Monk’s torso. The Nameless Monk and Kar return home to find that Kar’s employer has been murdered by Strucker’s granddaughter, Nina. They return to the Asian laundromat but are betrayed by an ambitious monk. All parties are taken to Strucker’s base of operations and tortured. The Nameless Monk and Kar seek the help of Jade, whom they learn is the daughter of a currently imprisoned Russian crime lord. The Nameless Monk realizes that by fighting Jade in her “palace” (as she is a Mafia “princess”), Kar has fulfilled the second prophecy. Nina interrupts their meeting, captures the Nameless Monk, and has Jade and Kar beaten. Later, Jade and Kar infiltrate Strucker’s headquarters, where they are separated. Jade fights Nina and defeats her, and Kar finds the Nameless Monk. By now, Strucker has regained his youth, but he is unable to obtain the content of the last line of the Scroll, which is present only in the Nameless Monk’s memory. Strucker attempts to scan the Nameless Monk’s brain, but Kar prevents him. A fight ensues, and Strucker is thrown from the roof onto electric cables; however, the power of the Scroll preserves Strucker from death.
While Jade frees the other monks, the Nameless Monk transfers the Scroll’s content, and the task of protecting it for 60 years, to Kar. Strucker then attempts to kill Kar, but is killed himself – Jade is revealed to have taken some of the Scroll’s power, as it was she who fulfilled the final prophecy by rescuing the monks. The Nameless Monk tells them that they both passed the three prophecies and the final test. The next day, the now aged Nameless Monk meets Kar and Jade, to whom he reveals the final line of the Scroll and whom he now deems inseparable. He then departs, lighthearted.Bulletproof Monk could have been a lot better than it is, with a little more time spent on it, but as it is it is a silly amusing film, which kept me entertained for an hour and a half. I recommend it to martial art flick junkies.

REVIEW: TWO FOR THE MONEY

CAST

Al Pacino (Simone)
Matthew McConaughey (EDTV)
Rene Russo (Thor)
Armand Assante (Judge Dredd)
Carly Pope (Arrow)
Jeremy Piven (Mr. Selfridge)
Jaime King (Sin City)
Ralph Garman (Yoga Hosers)
Craig Veroni (Dark Angel)
Gerard Plunkett (Fringe)
James Kirk (Final Destination 2)
Gary Hudson (Smallville)
Steve Makaj (Stargate SG.1)
Adrian Holmes (V-Wars)
Jason Schombing (Sanctuary)
Louis Mustillo (Mike & Molly)
Kendall Cross (Van Helsing)
Luciana Carro (Battlestar Galactica)
David Lovgren (Antitrust)
April Telek (Rogue)
Susan Ward (Shallow Hal)

Brandon Lang (McConaughey) is a former college football star who, after sustaining a career-ending injury, takes a job handicapping football games. His success at choosing winners catches the eye of Walter Abrams (Pacino), the slick head of one of the biggest sports consulting operations in the United States. Walter takes Brandon under his wing, and soon they are making tremendous amounts of money.

Lang’s in-depth knowledge of the game, leagues and players brings in big winnings and bigger clients. Abrams’ cable television show, The Sports Advisors, skyrockets in popularity when he adds Lang’s slick “John Anthony” persona to the desk, infuriating Jerry Sykes (Jeremy Piven), who up to now has been Walter’s in-house expert. Lang’s total image is remade — new car, new wardrobe and a new look with the assistance of Walter’s wife, Toni (Russo), a hair stylist.

Things suddenly go south, however, when Lang begins playing his hunches instead of doing his homework. He loses his touch and is even physically assaulted by the thugs of a gambler (Armand Assante) who lost a great deal of money following Lang’s advice. Lang and Abrams’ once-solid relationship sours. Lang’s new high-rolling lifestyle depends entirely on his ability to predict the outcomes of the games. Millions are at stake by the time he places his last bet, and Abrams grows increasingly unstable. (Abrams is a recovering gambling addict and alcoholic, among other things. Toni tells Lang early on that Walter’s life is “held together by meetings; if there’s an ‘anonymous’ at the end of it, he goes. He has to.”). He secretly begins gambling all of his own money on Lang’s picks and becomes suspicious that Lang is having an affair with his wife.

The film concludes with Lang’s predictions coming true for the last game, both of which he allegedly determines by flipping coins in a bathroom, as he leaves New York and takes a job as coach of a junior league football team.

Not a great movie by any means, but some truly fine acting from the trio of stars. The supporting cast also gives solid roles despite the skimpy script. If gambling of any sort, and sports gambling in particular, is of interest to you, then this is a movie to recommend. Otherwise see it for the actors, not the story.

REVIEW: SIN CITY 2: A DAME TO KILL FOR

CAST

Bruce Willis (Cop Out)
Mickey Rourke (Immortals)
Jessica Alba (Machete)
Josh Brolin (Gangster Squad)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt (The Dark Knight Rises)
Rosario Dawson (Daredevil)
Eva Green (Dark Shadows)
Powers Booth (Agents of S.H.E.I.L.D.)
Dennis Haysbert (24)
Ray Liotta (Hannibal)
Christopher Meloni (Man of Steel)
Jeremy Piven (Old School)
Julia Garner (The Assistant)
Christopher Lloyd (A Million Ways To Die In The West)
Jaime King (Bulletproof Monk)
Juno Temple (Horns)
Stacy Keach (The Bourne Legacy)
Marton Csokas (Xena)
Lady Gaga (Machete Kills Again)
Alexa Penavega (Spy Kids)

Just Another Saturday Night

Marv (Mickey Rourke) regains consciousness on a highway overlooking the Projects, surrounded by several dead young men and a crashed police car, and with no memory of how he got there. He retraces his steps, recalling that since it’s Saturday, he watched Nancy Callahan (Jessica Alba) dance at Kadie’s Saloon. Stepping outside, he encounters four rich frat boys burning a homeless man alive. When Marv intervenes, the leader of the frat boys shoots him in the arm, calling him “Bernini Boy,” which Marv mishears as “Bernie.” They flee; Marv follows, stealing a Police car on the way, which he crashes into their car, leading to his blackout and memory loss. He follows the two surviving frat boys into The Projects, the neighborhood where he grew up. With the assistance of the deadly residents lurking in the shadows, he dispatches the frat boys. He questions the leader about being called “Bernini Boy” and learns that it is the brand of coat he is wearing. After slitting the boy’s throat, he considers his coat and realizes he can’t remember how he acquired it.

The Long Bad Night (Part I)

Johnny (Joseph Gordon Levitt), a cocky young gambler, arrives in Sin City and heads to Kadie’s place, where he immediately hits the jackpot on multiple slot machines. Taking a young waitress, Marcie (Julia Garner), with him as a good luck charm, he buys into the backroom poker game led by the all-powerful Senator Roark (Powers Boothe). Johnny repeatedly wins in the high-stakes game, and cleans the senator out. One other player, the corrupt police lieutenant Liebowitz (Jude Ciccolella), warns him to flee the city, but instead Johnny takes Marcie out for a night on the town. He walks her home when Roark’s goons suddenly attack him. He fights them off and tells Marcie to meet him at a hotel before he is escorted into the Senator’s waiting limousine. In payment for the humiliation he suffered at the card game, Roark takes back his money and uses a pair of pliers to break the fingers of Johnny’s playing hand. They toss him from the car and the Senator shoots Johnny in the leg. Roark then reveals that he recognized Johnny as his illegitimate son. However, he remarks that he only considered his dead son Roark Jr. his flesh and blood. He leaves Johnny alive, preferring to let him suffer, and Johnny swears revenge.

A Dame to Kill For

Years before “The Big Fat Kill”, Dwight McCarthy (Josh Brolin) attempts to put his violent past behind him, working as a private detective and leading a life of complete sobriety, struggling daily to refuse his inner demons. After saving the life of Sally (Juno Temple), young hooker, who is nearly murdered by her businessman lover (Ray Liotta), he receives an unexpected phone call from his former lover, Ava Lord (Eva Green), who left Dwight four years prior for a wealthy tycoon, Damien Lord (Marton Csokas). She begs him to meet her at Kadie’s saloon, and despite his embittered feelings, he agrees. When Ava arrives, she begs forgiveness for leaving him and implies she is afraid for her life before her massive chauffeur, Manute (Dennis Haysbert), arrives to escort her home. Unable to get her out of his mind, Dwight sneaks into Damien Lord’s estate, where he observes Ava swimming, but is caught and beaten. Dwight is returned home, where a nude Ava waits for him. He tries to throw her out, but can’t resist her and they make love. She tells him that Damien and Manute torture her physically and mentally, and she knows Damien will kill her soon. Manute arrives and viciously beats a naked Dwight, sending him out the window with a single punch.

Determined to rescue Ava, Dwight recruits Marv to help him, and they mount an assault on Lord’s compound. Marv attacks Manute, putting him in traction and tearing out his eye. Dwight confronts Damien Lord, who denies Ava’s accusations, and an enraged Dwight beats him to death. As he reacts in horror, Ava appears and shoots Dwight several times, taunting him and thanking him for helping her murder her husband and take over his fortune. She shoots him in the face and forces him to fall out of a window, where Marv rescues him and takes him to Old Town. Dwight’s old flame, Gail (Rosario Dawson), recognizes him and saves his life. With the help of Gail and the deadly assassin Miho (Jamie Chung), Dwight undergoes reconstructive surgery on his face and plots his revenge.

Meanwhile, two detectives, Mort (Christopher Meloni) and Bob (Jeremy Piven), investigate Damien’s death. Ava claims Dwight was an obsessive ex-lover, and he killed her husband in a jealous rage. Bob is skeptical but Ava seduces Mort, who believes her every word. They begin an affair and Ava pressures him to find and kill Dwight. When Mort, obsessed with Ava, attempts to track Dwight down in Old Town (an action that would break the truce between the police and the prostitutes), Bob attempts to stop him. An enraged Mort shoots Bob in the face, then commits suicide afterward. Out of options, Ava reluctantly partners with the mob boss Wallenquist (Stacy Keach).

Dwight (with his reconstructed new face), accompanied by Gail and Miho, poses as Wallenquist’s man from Texas. Inside Ava’s estate, however, Manute sees past the new face and captures Dwight. Gail and Miho strike from Dwight’s car, and Dwight shoots Manute with a hidden .45 he had up his left sleeve. Six bullets fail to kill him, and Manute aims shakily at Dwight as Ava unexpectedly grabs one of Manute’s guns, shooting Manute several times. She attempts to convince Dwight to pair with her, and that the pain he suffered revealed his true intentions, but Dwight shoots her mid-kiss, and she dies in his arms.

 The Long Bad Night (Part II)

Johnny visits an unlicensed doctor, Kroenig (Christopher Lloyd), who shoots up heroin before trading his services for Johnny’s last $40 and his shoes. Realizing he left Marcie unprotected, Johnny rushes to his hotel but finds the Senator waiting for him, along with Marcie’s dismembered head and hands. Again, the senator lets him go. Intent on taking down Roark, Johnny scrounges a dollar from a sympathetic waitress (Lady Gaga) which he uses to regain enough money playing slots to buy his way into Roark’s game the following night. Playing a card shark’s con, Johnny folds his first few hands, allowing Roark to taunt him about his dead mother. He once again cons Roark into going all in, then reveals his winning hand. Johnny taunts his father, reminding him that tonight’s story of how the same man beat him twice will follow him for the rest of his life. His vengeance completed, Johnny smiles resignedly, a single tear running down his face as Roark shoots him in the head, commanding his men to get rid of the body.

Nancy’s Last Dance

Four years after “That Yellow Bastard”,” Nancy Callahan is in a deep depression over John Hartigan’s death. She is obsessed with getting revenge on Senator Roark for having driven Hartigan to kill himself. As she wallows in despair, the ghost of Hartigan (Bruce Willis) watches over her, unable to reach her but still attempting to help. On the same night that Johnny joins the backroom poker game, Nancy attempts to shoot Roark from the stage of Kadie’s, but she can’t bring herself to pull the trigger.
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Nancy hallucinates a visit from Roark, and shortly thereafter cuts her hair and smashes a mirror…using its shards to cut her face. She decides to get Marv to help her kill Roark by showing him the scars and making him believe that Roark was responsible. As they step out of the club, they meet a motorcycle gang there to shoot up the place. Marv kills two but leaves their leader for Nancy to finish off. The pair mount an assault on Roark’s compound: Marv slaughters Roark’s bodyguards while Nancy picks off the guards with a crossbow. Marv is wounded, but Nancy continues on alone to confront Roark. Roark shoots her first in the side then the leg and is about to finish her off. Suddenly, Hartigan’s ghost appears in the mirror –startling Roark long enough for Nancy to recover and kill him.
sin-city-2-dame-to-fill-for-jessica-alba-bruce-willisThis is as visually stunning and as jaw dropping as the first film. I was thoroughly engrossed for 90 odd minutes, with the comic books faithfully reproduced. Something over and above many comic book adaptations is happening here, with plots stuck to with few liberties taken

REVIEW: SIN CITY

CAST

Bruce Willis (Armageddon)
Jessica Alba (Machete)
Rosario Dawson (Clerks II)
Clive Owen (Inside Man)
Devon Aoki (D.E.B.S.)
Mickey Rourke (Iron Man 2)
Alexis Bledel (Girl Walks Into a Bar)
Powers Boothe (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.)
Benicio Del Toro (Guardians of The Galaxy)
Michael Clarke Duncan (The Scorpion King)
Tommy Flanagan (Gladiator)
Marley Shelton (Planet Terror)
Nick Stahl (Terminator 3)
Carla Gugino (Watchmen)
Josh Hartnett (Halloween: H20)
Rutger Hauer (Batman Begins)
Jaime King (Pearl Harbor)
Michael Madsen (Bloodrayne)
Brittany Murphy (Don’t Say A Word)
Elijah Wood (Lord of The Rings)

Nick Offerman (Sing)
Nicky Katt (Boiler Room)
Makenzie Vega (13 Reasons Why)

The Customer Is Always Right (Part I)

The Salesman (Josh Hartnett) steps out of the elevator and walks onto a penthouse balcony overlooking Basin City, where The Customer awaits. He comforts her, the two briefly talk, share a kiss and he shoots her. As she dies in his arms, he ponders what she was running from

.

That Yellow Bastard (Part I)

On the docks of Sin City, aging police officer John Hartigan (Bruce Willis) tries to stop serial child-killer Roark Junior (Nick Stahl) from raping and killing his fourth known victim, eleven-year-old Nancy Callahan. Junior is the son of Senator Roark (Powers Boothe), who has bribed the police to cover up his son’s crimes. Hartigan’s partner Bob (Michael Madsen) tries to convince Hartigan to walk away, only to get knocked out.  Hartigan, fighting off the pain caused by his bad heart, confronts Roark Junior, shoots off his ear, right hand and genitals. Bob shoots Hartigan in the back, revealing himself to be on Senator Roark’s payroll. As the sirens approach, Bob leaves and Nancy comforts him. Hartigan passes out, reasoning his death is a fair trade for the girl’s life.

The Hard Goodbye

After a one-night stand, Marv (Mickey Rourke) awakens to find that Goldie (Jaime King), the woman he’d been with, was killed while he slept. He flees the frame-up as the police arrive, vowing to avenge her death to repay her kindness. His parole officer Lucille (Carla Gugino) warns him to give up on this mission, believing Marv may have imagined it all due to his “condition”. Marv interrogates several informants, working up to a corrupt priest who reveals that the Roark family was behind the murder. After killing the priest, Marv is attacked by a woman who looks like Goldie, which he dismisses as a hallucination caused by his “condition”.

Marv goes to the Roark family farm and is subdued by the silent stalker, Kevin (Elijah Wood), who is also Goldie’s killer. He awakens to find Lucille has been captured after looking into his story. She tells Marv that the killer is a cannibal and that his victims, including Goldie, are prostitutes. He and Lucille escape their holding cell, but Lucille is shot by the leader of a squad of corrupt cops. Marv kills the squad, interrogates the leader and finds out that Cardinal Patrick Henry Roark (Rutger Hauer) arranged for Goldie’s murder.

Marv goes to Old Town (Sin City’s prostitute-run red-light district) to learn more about Goldie, and is captured by her twin sister, Wendy, who Marv previously dismissed as a hallucination. He eventually convinces her that he is not the killer and she resolves to help him avenge Goldie. The pair return to the farm, where Marv kills Kevin. He brings Kevin’s head to Cardinal Roark, who confesses his part in the murders. Marv kills the cardinal but is then shot and captured by his guards.

After Marv’s wound are treated, he is forced to confess to killing Cardinal Roark, Kevin and all their victims. He is sentenced to death in the electric chair. Wendy visits him on death row and thanks him for avenging her sister.

The Big Fat Kill

Shellie (Brittany Murphy) is harassed by her drunken and abusive ex-boyfriend Jackie Boy (Benecio Del Toro). When Jackie goes to the bathroom to urinate, her new lover Dwight McCarthy (Clive Owen), dunks his face into the toilet, threatening to kill him if he doesn’t leave her alone. Angry and embarrassed, Jackie Boy leaves Shellie’s flat, and Dwight follows him to make sure he doesn’t take out his anger on another girl. Jackie Boy and his crew arrive in Old Town, where they harass Becky (Alexis Bledel), a young prostitute. Dwight runs into Gail (Rosario Dawson), Old Town’s leader and Dwight’s on-and-off lover, and the two watch the scene. When Jackie Boy threatens Becky with a gun, Miho (Devon Aoki), Old Town’s enforcer, kills the whole group. As Dwight and the prostitutes check the corpses’ personal effects, they realize Jackie Boy is actually Detective Lieutenant Jack Rafferty of Basin City Police. If the police learned how he died, their truce with the prostitutes would end and the mob would be free to wage war on Old Town

Dwight takes the bodies to a tar pit to hide them from the police. There he is attacked by mercenaries who retrieves Jackie’s head to bring back as proof of his death. Dwight nearly drowns in the tar before Miho saves him. The two kill the remaining mercenaries, retrieve the head and return to Old Town. Meanwhile, Manute (Michael Clarke Duncan), an enforcer for mob boss Wallenquist, kidnaps Gail to force Old Town to surrender without a fight. It is revealed that Becky is the one who tells the mob of Jackie’s death. Dwight offers to trade Jackie Boy’s head for Gail’s life, and meet Manute’s group in a narrow alley. As he detonates the grenade stuffed in the head, all the prostitutes, who have been waiting on top of the buildings on both sides of the alley, gun down the mob gang and kill Manute, leaving no witnesses. Becky escapes the onslaught.

That Yellow Bastard (Part II)

As Hartigan recovers in a hospital, he learns that Roark, Jr. is in a coma, the Roark legacy is in serious jeopardy and he will be framed for Junior’s crimes. A grateful Nancy, who was denied the right to testify and vindicate Hartigan, promises to write Hartigan every week while he is in prison. Hartigan goes to jail, though he refuses to confess. He receives weekly letters from Nancy for eight years. One day, the letters stop arriving and he receives a severed finger instead. Worried that the Roarks somehow tracked down Nancy, Hartigan confesses to all charges, leading to his parole. He searches for Nancy and finds her at Kadie’s Bar, where she has become an exotic dancer. As Hartigan realizes everything was a ruse just for him to lead Roark to Nancy, she recognizes him, runs off the stage and leaps onto him.

The two leave the bar in Nancy’s car, pursued by a disfigured yellow man. Hartigan wounds him and the two stay in a small motel outside of town. Nancy confesses her love for Hartigan, who rebuffs her advances citing their significant age difference. The yellow man, who turns out to be Roark Jr., overpowers Hartigan and takes Nancy to the Roark farm. Hartigan gets to the farm, kills Junior and saves Nancy. Knowing that Senator Roark will never stop hunting him, Hartigan commits suicide to ensure Nancy’s safety.

The Customer Is Always Right (Part II)

An injured Becky departs from a hospital, talking on a cell phone with her mother. In the elevator she encounters The Salesman, dressed as a doctor. He offers her a cigarette, calling her by name, and she abruptly ends the call with her mother, realizing that The Salesman is preparing to kill her.

This is one of the most striking, memorable, imaginative and violent films to have come out in a long, long time. It is a cliched ridden flick where nothing is taken too seriously – especially life – and where anything goes.