REVIEW: DEATH BECOMES HER

CAST

Meryl Streep (The Devil Wears Prada)
Bruce Willis (Cop Out)
Goldie Hawn (Overboard)
Isabella Rossellini (Earthsea)
Nancy Fish (The Mask)
Mary Ellen Trainor (Roswell)
Mimi Kennedy (Mom)
Debra Jo Rupp (That 70s Show)
Jim Jansen (Water for Elephants)
Carol Ann Susi (The Big Bang Theory)
Sydney Pollack (Will & Grace)

In 1978, narcissistic, manipulative Madeline Ashton performs in a musical on Broadway. Madeline invites long-time rival Helen Sharp, an aspiring writer, backstage along with her fiancé, plastic surgeon Ernest Menville. Ernest is smitten with Madeline, soon breaking off his engagement with Helen to marry her. Seven years later, Helen is in a psychiatric hospital after fixating upon Madeline. Obese and depressed, Helen feigns rehabilitation and is released, plotting revenge on Madeline. After an additional seven years, Madeline lives well in Beverly Hills with Ernest, but they are miserable together. Madeline’s career has faded, and Ernest is an alcoholic reduced to working as a reconstructive mortician. Receiving an invitation to a party celebrating Helen’s new book, Madeline rushes to a spa where she regularly receives extensive facial treatments. Understanding Madeline’s situation, the spa owner gives her the business card of Lisle von Rhoman, a woman who specializes in youth rejuvenation. Madeline dismisses the spa owner’s advice.

Madeline and Ernest attend the party for Helen’s novel Forever Young and discover Helen is thin and youthful. Dumbfounded and depressed by Helen’s appearance, Madeline goes to see her young lover but discovers he is with a woman his own age. Dejected, Madeline drives to Lisle’s home. Lisle is a mysterious, wealthy socialite who claims to be 71, but appears much younger, and reveals to Madeline the secret of her beauty: a potion that promises eternal life and an ever-lasting youthful appearance. Madeline purchases and drinks the potion and is rejuvenated. As a condition of purchase, Madeline must disappear from public life after ten years to keep the existence of the potion secret. Lisle warns Madeline to take good care of her body.

Helen has seduced Ernest and convinced him to kill Madeline. When Madeline returns home, she and Ernest argue, during which Madeline falls down the stairs and breaks her neck. Believing Madeline dead, Ernest phones Helen for advice, not seeing Madeline stand and approach him with her head twisted backwards. Ernest assumes she has a dislocated neck and drives her to the emergency room. Madeline is told she is technically dead and faints. She is taken to the morgue due to her body having no pulse and a temperature below 80°F. After rescuing Madeline, Ernest takes the sign of her “resurrection” as a miracle, returns home with Madeline and uses his skills to repair her body.

 
Helen arrives home, demanding information about Madeline’s situation. Overhearing Helen and Ernest discussing their plot to stage Madeline’s death, Madeline shoots Helen with a double-barreled shotgun. Although the blast causes a gaping hole in her stomach, Helen survives, revealing that she drank the same potion. Fed up with the pair, Ernest prepares to leave but Helen and Madeline convince him to do one last repair on their bodies. They realize their bodies will need constant maintenance and scheme to have Ernest drink the potion to ensure he will always be available.

After bringing Ernest to Lisle, she offers to give him the potion free of charge. Ernest refuses; he would rather live a normal life than spend an eternity with Madeline and Helen. He pockets the potion and flees, but becomes trapped on the roof. Helen and Madeline implore Ernest to drink the potion to survive an impending fall. Ernest refuses and drops the potion to the ground several stories below, but after falling he lands in Lisle’s pool and escapes. After Lisle banishes Madeline and Helen from her group, the pair realize they must rely on each other for companionship and maintenance. Thirty-seven years later, Madeline and Helen attend Ernest’s funeral, where he is eulogized as having lived an adventurous and fulfilling life. The two bicker as they leave Ernest’s funeral. They are parodies of their former selves, with cracked, peeling paint and putty covering most of their grey and rotting flesh. Helen trips and teeters at the top of a staircase. After Madeline hesitates to help her, Helen grabs Madeline and the two tumble down the stairs, breaking to pieces. As their disembodied heads roll and totter together, Helen sardonically asks Madeline, “Do you remember where you parked the car?”

Death Becomes Her is a must watch, simply because it is so out of sync with reality and maintains a strong level of comedy and fantasy that will make your head spin.

REVIEW: EARTHSEA (2004)

CAST

Shawn Ashmore (X-Men)
Kristin Kreuk (Smallville)
Isabella Rossellini (Death Becomes Her)
Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon)
Sebastian Roché (The Originals)
Chris Gauthier (Watchmen)
Jennifer Calvert (Stargate SG.1)
Emily Hampshire (Earth: FInal Conflict)
Mark Hildreth (V)
Alan Scarfe (Andromeda)
Alessandro Juliani (Battlestar Galactica)
Erin Karpluk (Being Erica)
Amanda Tapping (Sanctuary)
Katharine Isabelle (Hannibal)
Dave ‘Squatch’ Ward (Pucca)
Mark Acheson (Elf)
John Tench (Andromeda)
Neil Grayston (Wonderfalls)
John DeSantis (Arrow)
Peter Kent (Total Recall)
Peter Williams (Stargate SG.1)
Alex Diakun (Andromeda)
Frank C. Turner (IT)

In the land of Earthsea, a young wizard named Ged has visions about a girl and doors opening. Meanwhile, King Tygath wants to rule the land and release the Nameless Ones, demons from whom he hopes to learn the secret of immortality. He sends men to attack Ged’s village, in search of the wizard of prophesy (Ged). Ged learns his first spell from an elderly woman. When the invasion comes, Ged uses a mist spell and lures the invaders over a cliff, saving the village. However, Ged also falls off the cliff.  Tygath tries to convince High Priestess Thar to release the Nameless Ones, but she refuses. She is poisoned by Rosa, her attendant who has been tricked by the king’s lover, Kossil, every time she has tea.

A magus named Ogion arrives at Ged’s village and revives Ged. He tells Ged his true name and takes him for training, but Ged is too impatient; he is sent to the magic school on Roke. There he meets the bully, Jasper, and befriends a student named Vetch. Ged shapeshifts into a hawk to show off. Jasper then challenges him to raise a spirit from the dead, leading him to accidentally release a Nameless One. The demon attacks Ged before being driven away by the Archmagus, who tells him that this Nameless One will hunt Ged down and try to possess him, using Ged’s power for further destruction. Ged must go somewhere in hiding until he can find its true name and destroy it.With the help of Jasper, King Tygath takes control of the magic school. He throws a knife at the Archmagus, apparently killing him and making Jasper the new Archmagus.

With the help of Ogion, Ged confronts the Gebbeth and attempts to drown him using a rock, however, it escapes with Ged’s likeness and voice. Ged’s impersonator becomes a murderer, and Vetch, a magus himself, chases Ged until he realizes Ged is not possessed by the Gebbeth and they decide to hunt it together. They are attacked by the dragon, Orm Embar, but Ged uses the dragon’s true name to bind him and ask three questions. He wastes his first question, but with his second, he learns the Gebbeth’s location. The dragon tells him where to find the two pieces of the Amulet of Peace, which when reunited would save Earthsea, but Ged could have asked the true name of the demon. Meanwhile, Thar appoints a successor, Tenar, and tells her the incantation to release the Nameless Ones. Kossil strangles Rosa and frames Tenar, leading to her imprisonment.


Ged and Vetch return to Roke for help in decoding the dragon’s riddle. The Archmagus survived Tygath’s attack and made the real Jasper into a village fool as punishment. He sends Ged and Vetch to unseal the Nameless Tombs on Atuan, but Ged is captured and brought before Thar, who mistakes him for an evil wizard. In the labyrinth, Ged is locked in the cell next to Tenar. They break free and recognize each other from their visions. Thar realizes her mistake right before her death. Kossil tries to force Tenar to reveal the incantation and fails, so Tygath kills Kossil and follows Tenar to the gate of the Nameless Ones.  Vetch finds the tomb first and is taken by the Gebbeth. Ged encounters Tygath in the labyrinth and fights him but then escapes into the tomb. He encounters the Gebbeth and realizes its true name is his own, because it is the darkness in himself. The demon is absorbed into Ged, making him whole again and strengthening him to strike Tygath in the tomb. Tygath forces Tenar to release the Nameless Ones with the incantation. The Nameless Ones are released and take Tygath into the sky before flying off. Ged reveals part of the key is the second half of the amulet. The Amulet of Peace is made whole, dispelling the Nameless Ones with a bright light and restoring peace to Earthsea. Ged is seen victorious with Tenar and they kiss.I haven’t read the books, But this is very decent fantasy film. The story and charecterisation was strong throughout.