REVIEW: AUSTIN POWERS 1,2 & 3

CAST

Mike Myers (Shrek)
Elizabeth Hurley (Bedazzled)
Robert Wagner (Two and a Half Men)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Mindy Sterling (Minions)
Michael York (Logan’s Run)
Fabiana Udenio (The Wedding Planner)
Will Ferrell (Elf)
Mimi Rogers (Ginger Snaps)
Charles Napier (The Silence of The Lambs)
Carrie Fisher (Star wars)
Tom Arnold (True Lies)
Monet Mazur (Rageing Angels)
Clint Howard (Apollo 13)
Cynthia LaMontagne (That 70s Show)
Brian George (The Big Bang Theory)
Rob Lowe (The West Wing)
Patricia Tallman (Babylon 5)

In 1967, British spy Austin Powers (Mike Myers) attempts to assassinate his nemesis, Dr. Evil (also Mike Myers), in his own nightclub (the Electric Psychedelic Pussycat Swingers Club). Dr. Evil escapes by launching himself in a space rocket disguised as a Big Boy statue, and cryogenically freezing himself, to return at a time when free love no longer reigned, and greed and corruption ruled again. Austin volunteers to be put into cryostasis to be revived when Dr. Evil returns.
Thirty years later in 1997, Dr. Evil returns with new plans for world domination, and kills his henchman Mustafa (Will Ferrell) for making his (Dr. Evil) cat, Mr. Bigglesworth, go bald in the unfreezing process. The fire doesn’t kill him but gets shot twice. Dr. Evil discovers his henchman Number 2 (Robert Wagner) has transformed Evil’s empire into Virtucon, a multi-billion dollar enterprise. Though already wealthy, Dr. Evil proposes several plans to threaten the world for more money. However, he finds that each of them have already been done during his absence. He ultimately falls back on his old plan to steal nuclear weapons and hold the world hostage, and is advised to seek one hundred billion dollars (revised upward, on the advice of his employees, from his 1960s notion that one million dollars constitutes a world-dominating sum). Later, he also discovers that henchwoman Frau Farbissina (Mindy Sterling) used a sample of Evil’s semen just a couple of years after his cryostasis to artificially create his son, Scott Evil (Seth Green), now a Generation X young adult. Scott is resentful of his father, despite Dr. Evil’s attempts to get closer to him through therapy.
Having been aware of Dr. Evil’s return, the British Ministry of Defence unfreezes Austin, acclimatizing him to the year 1997 with the help of agent Vanessa Kensington (Elizabeth Hurley), the daughter of his sidekick in the 1960s, Mrs. Kensington (Mimi Rogers), who has retired during Austin’s 30-year absence. Powers quickly finds his free love credo of the 1960s to be out of touch with the 1990s, and is unable to ensnare Vanessa with his charms. Later, the two pose as a married couple in a Las Vegas hotel and meet Number 2’s Italian secretary, Alotta Fagina (Fabiana Udenio). Austin nearly gets killed by Dr Evil’s assassin, Paddy O’Brien (Paul Dillon) while going to the restroom but drowns him in an attempt to find out who Number 2 and Alotta work for. Austin later enters Alotta’s penthouse suite for reconnaissance and discovers plans for Dr. Evil’s “Project Vulcan”, which aims to drill a nuclear warhead into the Earth’s molten core and trigger volcanic eruptions worldwide. After Alotta finds Austin in her suite, she seduces him by taking off all of her clothes. The two eventually have sex in her hot tub, unbeknownst to Vanessa. Dr. Evil, learning that Powers is back and on his trail, creates a series of seductive female robots (called Fembots) to charm Austin before killing him. Vanessa finds about Austin’s affair with Alotta, deeply upsetting her. Realizing he has fallen in love with Vanessa, Austin apologizes to her for the affair with Alotta and vows to only be with her.
Later the couple infiltrates Dr. Evil’s headquarters but are captured by his henchman, Random Task (Joe Son). After Dr. Evil makes his demands to the world, he reveals that even after receiving the money he will still proceed with Project Vulcan. He then places Austin and Vanessa in a death trap that they easily escape from. Austin sends Vanessa for help, while he tries to find Dr. Evil. Austin enters Dr. Evil’s meeting area where he finds what he thinks are sexy women but really, the Fembots. The Fembots are wearing sexy pink and purple lingerie and do sexy poses. Austin gets distracted and a Fembot lands on his shoulders while another sprays him with pink knockout gas. He lies in bed with them happy, surrounded by them in a lustful daze but snaps out of it and tries to go get Dr. Evil. They rub his chest and convince him to stay. They continue to talk sexy to him and make smooching sounds. After a Fembot shows him her underwear, Austin tries to escape but the Fandots say he can’t resist them so he performs a sexy dance where he strips down to his UK flag underwear and does sexy dance moves which arouse the Fembots so much, their heads literally explode. He gets spotted by Vanessa but explains what happened and gets changed. Austin, Vanessa and British forces later raid Dr. Evil’s compound and Austin finds the doomsday device and deactivates it at the last moment. He finds Dr. Evil in the main chamber and almost has a chance to bring him to justice, but Alotta Fagina arrives holding Vanessa hostage and thwarts Austin’s chance to capture Dr. Evil. However, Number 2 appears and attempts to betray Dr. Evil, offering to make a deal with Austin. Dr. Evil disposes of Number 2 using the trap door leading to fire (although Number 2 survives) and escapes to his rocket, setting off the base’s self-destruct system. Vanessa knocks Alotta unconscious and escapes with Austin as the lair explodes.
Austin and Vanessa are later married, but during their honeymoon they are attacked by Random Task. Austin subdues the assassin with “his” Swedish made penis enlarger pump and Vanessa knocks him out by hitting him on the head with a bottle of champagne. Then they push him down the hallway on a cart and the couple adjourns to their balcony to have wild sex. Noticing a rather bright star, Austin pulls out a telescope to discover that it is in fact Dr. Evil’s cryogenic chamber in which he vows revenge. During the end credits, Austin does a photoshoot with Vanessa and Austin’s band “Ming Tea” perform their debut single “BBC”
The originality of the humour is what makes Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery a stand-out film. Equally importantly, the acting by a seemingly earnest Mike Myers is amazing. He not only pulls of a geeky-yet-charming Austin Powers, but also the bumbling-but-evil Dr. Evil. The supporting cast, featuring Robert Wagner as Number Two, Seth Green as Dr. Evil’s son Scott, Mindy Sterling as Frau Farbissina, and an indulgent Elizabeth Hurley as Austin’s sidekick and love-interest are all excellent but Myers has the centre stage.

CAST

Mike Myers (Shrek)
Heather Graham (From Hell)
Michael York (Logan’s Run)
Robert Wagner (Two and a Half Men)
Rob Lowe (The West Wing)
Mindy Sterling (Minions)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Verne Troyer (The Love Guru)
Elizabeth Hurley (Bedazzled)
Gia Carides (Bliss)
Will Ferrell (Elf)
Oliver Muirhead (The Duke)
Clint Howard (Apollo 13)
Kristen Johnston (3rd Rock From the Sun)
Elvis Costello (Two and a Half Men)
Jerry Springer (The Ringmaster)
Rebecca Romijn (X-Men)
Woody Harrelson (The Hunger Games)
Tim Robbins (The Green Lantern)
George Cheung (Dark Angel)
Muse Watson (Prison Break)
David Koechner (Anchorman)
Jane Carr (The Five Year Engagement)
Kevin Durand (Dark Angel)
Jennifer Coolidge (2 Broke Girls)
Fred Willard (Anchorman)
Tony Jay (Lois & Clark)

Austin Powers is enjoying his honeymoon with his wife, the former Vanessa Kensington. She turns out to be one of Dr. Evil’s fembots, who attempts to kill Austin, then self-destructs. Austin grieves briefly, then proceeds to the hotel lobby nude and celebrates being single again. A NATO monitoring facility observes the return of Dr. Evil, confronting his son Scott, and then starting a riot, on The Jerry Springer Show, and informs British intelligence. At Dr. Evil’s Seattle headquarters, Dr. Evil is presented with a one-eighth-size clone of himself whom he calls Mini-Me.
Dr. Evil unveils his latest evil plan: he has developed a time machine to go back to the 1960s and steal Austin’s mojo, the source of Austin’s sexual appeal. Dr. Evil and Mini-Me go back to 1969 and meet a younger Number Two and Frau Farbissina. An obese “Scottish Guard” called Fat Bastard extracts Austin’s mojo from his frozen body at the Ministry of Defence Cryo Chamber. British intelligence warns Austin that one of Dr. Evil’s agents is after him, and during a photo shoot the wanton Ivana Humpalot seduces him, but at the last moment she claims he is too sexy for her to kill him. They have sex in his bed, but do not get far before he discovers that he has lost his mojo and is impotent.
The MOD sends Austin back to 1969 with its own time travel device, a convertible Volkswagen New Beetle. Austin arrives at a party in his London pad and with the assistance of a CIA agent, Felicity Shagwell, escapes an assassination attempt by two of Dr. Evil’s operatives. Austin and Felicity are pursued by Mustafa, another of Dr. Evil’s henchmen; when caught he reveals the existence of Dr. Evil’s secret volcano lair. Before he can divulge its location, Mini-Me shoots him in the neck with a dart, causing him to fall off a cliff.
After examining photographs from the crime scene at MOD headquarters, Austin identifies Fat Bastard as the perpetrator of the theft of his mojo. At Dr. Evil’s lair, Fat Bastard arrives with Austin’s mojo. Dr. Evil drinks some of it and has sex with Frau Farbissina. This results in an awkward situation when Frau reveals that she is pregnant. At the same moment Scott, Dr. Evil’s son, arrives through the time portal. Dr. Evil announces his latest plan — to hold the world ransom by threatening to destroy major cities each hour, using a giant laser on the Moon. In London, Austin and Felicity get to know each other, but when Felicity tries to have sex with Austin, he turns her down because of his lost mojo.
Under MOD instructions to implant a homing device into Fat Bastard, Felicity seduces him, allowing her to plant it in his anus. Fat Bastard forces it out of his bowels into a Paddington Station toilet, but a stool sample from the scene is analyzed to reveal traces of a vegetable that only grows on one Caribbean island. Austin and Felicity arrive on the island, but are apprehended. They are put in a cell with a guard who is overcome when Felicity exposes her breasts. Dr. Evil and Mini-Me leave for the Moon to install the giant laser and are followed by Austin and Felicity, who hitch a ride on Apollo 11. In Dr. Evil’s moon base, Austin battles with Mini-Me, eventually flushing him into space. As Austin confronts Dr. Evil, Dr. Evil gives him a choice: Save the world or Felicity, who is locked in a chamber with poison gas.
Felicity tells Austin to save the world and he succeeds in doing so by kicking Frau, diverting the laser and saving Washington D.C. Felicity is killed by the poison gas. Austin chases Dr. Evil and shoots him in the leg. Before Austin can kill him, Dr. Evil tells him he could use the time machine to save Felicity and the world. Austin travels ten minutes into the past, meeting up with himself and saving both the world and Felicity. Dr. Evil initiates the self-destruct mechanism of the moon base and escapes in his rocket after throwing Austin’s mojo into the air. Both Austins fail to catch it and it crashes on the floor and is destroyed. Felicity points out that all the things Austin has done show that he never lost his mojo. They escape through the time portal to 1999.
At Austin’s Pad, Fat Bastard makes another attempt to assassinate Austin, but Felicity disarms him. Felicity and Austin then throw a party. Dr. Evil recovers Mini-Me from space and vows to “get” Austin. On Jerry Springer, Scott learns he was not created in a test tube, but is the love child of Dr. Evil and Frau Farbissina. Austin returns to his pad, only to discover Felicity with the past Austin, who claims that since he and Austin are the same person, it is not cheating. Austin forgives Felicity.
Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me’ is – amazingly – even funnier than the first film. It’s even more daft, even more crude and just simply great fun to watch.

CAST

Mike Myers (Shrek)
Beyonce Knowles (Dreamgirls)
Michael York (Logan’s Run)
Robert Wagner (Two and a Half Men)
Michael Caine (Batman Begins)
Rob Lowe (The West Wing)
Seth Green (Family Guy)
Verne Troyer (The Love Guru)
Heather Graham (From Hell)
Mindy Sterling (Minions)
Fred Savage (The Wonder Years)
Clint Howard (Apollo 13)
Masi Oka (Heroes)
Brian Tee (Jurassic World)
Fred Stoller (Little Man)
Greg Grunberg (Alias)
Rachel Roberts (Flashforward)
Nathan Lane (The Birdcage)
Kristen Johnston (3rd Rock From the Sun)
Tom Cruise (Legend)
Danny DeVito (Batman Returns)
Gwyneth Paltrow (Iron Man)
Kevin Spacey (American Beauty)
Britney Spears (Crossroads)
Tommy Lister (The Dark KNight)
Nichole Hiltz (Smallville)
John Travolta (The Punisher)

In 2002, in a new lair behind the famous Hollywood sign, Dr. Evil outlines his newest plan to his minions: he will go back in time to 1975 and bring back Johan van der Smut, aka “Goldmember”, who developed a cold fusion unit for a tractor beam which Dr. Evil names Preparation H, not to be confused with the well known product of the same name – Preparations A through G had failed earlier. He intends to use the tractor beam to pull a meteor into the Earth to strike the polar ice caps and cause global flooding. However, moments after revealing this plan Austin Powers and the British Secret Service attack and arrest Dr. Evil. Austin is knighted for his services, but is disappointed when his father, the famous super-spy Nigel Powers, fails to attend the event. At a party to celebrate his knighthood he sings a song with the band Ming Tea; later he meets two Japanese twins named Fook Mi and Fook Yu and is about to have a threesome with them when Basil Exposition informs Austin that his father has been kidnapped, the only clue being that the crew of his yacht have had their genitalia painted gold.
In search of answers, Austin visits the imprisoned Dr. Evil, who tells him that Goldmember is behind the abduction. Traveling to 1975, Austin infiltrates Goldmember’s roller disco club Studio 69 and meets up with Foxxy Cleopatra (Beyoncé Knowles), an old flame and FBI agent who is undercover as a disco singer. With Foxxy’s help, Austin locates his father but is unable to rescue him. Goldmember takes Nigel with him through Dr. Evil’s time machine into 2002, and leaves his golden clad henchwomen to kill Austin. Foxxy helps Austin escape, and asks to accompany him to the future in an effort to save his father and exact revenge upon Goldmember for murdering her partner. In 2002, Dr. Evil and Mini-Me instigate a riot in their prison, allowing them to escape. A British Intelligence mole named Number 3 (Fred Savage), who coincidentally has a large mole on his face, informs Austin that the doctor has moved to a new lair near Tokyo – a giant submarine shaped like Dr. Evil. Austin and Foxxy fly to Tokyo and confront one of Dr. Evil’s henchmen, Fat Bastard, now a sumo wrestler. After a humorous fight between Austin and Fat Bastard, Foxxy arrests Fat Bastard who tells them that a Japanese business man, Mr. Roboto, is working on a device for Dr. Evil and Goldmember.Austin and Foxxy later meet with Mr. Roboto, who pleads ignorance about Nigel’s whereabouts. Unconvinced, Austin and Foxxy infiltrate Roboto’s factory where the command unit for the tractor beam is being loaded in Goldmember’s car, and Roboto hands Goldmember a golden key needed to activate the beam. Foxxy confronts Goldmember while Austin attempts to free Nigel, but Goldmember escapes with the command unit and flees to Dr. Evil’s sub. Unable to settle their differences, Nigel and Austin part ways when they disagree on how to deal with the situation. Meanwhile, Dr. Evil’s son, Scott Evil, has become increasingly evil in an attempt to prove himself to his father, to the point that he too is going bald. Scott presents his father with sharks with laser beams, a request that had gone unfulfilled in the first film. Dr. Evil replaces Mini-Me with Scott as his favored son; the rejected Mini-Me defects and joins Austin.
Austin, Foxxy and Mini-Me infiltrate the sub, but Austin is captured. Dr. Evil prepares to activate the tractor beam, but Foxxy has stolen the key and frees Austin. Austin prepares to shoot Dr. Evil, when Nigel appears and reveals Dr. Evil and Austin are brothers, separated when they were toddlers when an assassination attempt killed their mother, and Dr. Evil was found and raised by Belgians. Dr. Evil and Austin embrace, enraging Scott, who flees to pursue his own vengeance, whilst Goldmember commandeers the tractor beam’s controls, unzipping his pants to reveal his gold-covered genitals to be a spare key. Goldmember activates the tractor beam, but Austin and Dr. Evil work together to reverse its polarity, destroying the meteor and saving the world. The heroes arrest Goldmember, who turns to the camera to reveal the entire string of events was adapted into a film by Steven Spielberg, starring Tom Cruise as Austin, Kevin Spacey as Dr. Evil, Danny DeVito as Mini-Me, and John Travolta as Goldmember. Austin, Foxxy, Dr. Evil, Mini-Me and Nigel are in the audience of a Hollywood theater watching the film. Upon exiting the theater they run into Fat Bastard, now thinner but flabby, thanks to the Subway diet. As Austin and Foxxy kiss, in Dr. Evil’s Hollywood lair, Scott – now completely bald, dressed like and laughing in a manner similar to his father – declares he will get his revenge on Austin and begins dancing like the singer Michael Jackson.
The third is fantastic… funny, disgusting, clever and uplifting! Mini-Me and Fat B****** are back with even better gags and the usual crude humour from the latter!!! But Mike Myers has triumphed in adding the hilarious dutch roller skating villain “Goldmember!” And the casting of Michael Cane as Nigel Powers, Austins father… or farja if you’re Goldmember… is excellent!
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