REVIEW: TED 2

CAST

Seth MacFarlane (Family Guy)
Mark Wahlberg (The Other Guys)
Amanda Seyfried (Pan)
Jessica Barth (Next)
Giovanni Ribisi (Avatar)
Morgan Freeman (The Dark Knight)
John Slattery (Mad men)
Patrick Warburton (Get Smart)
Michael Dorn (Star Trek: Ds9)
Bill Smitrovich (The Phantom)
Cocoa Brown (Big Fat Important Movie)
John Carroll Lynch (The Founder)
Jessica Szohr (Love Bite)
Tara Strong (Batman: The Killing Joke)
Sam J. Jones (Flash Gordon)
Sebastian Arcelus (Split)
Dennis Haysbert (Heat)
Liam Neeson (Batman Begins)
Patrick Stewart (Ameircan Dad)
Nana Visitor (Star Trek: Ds9)
Ralph Garman (The Lego Batman Movie)
Ron Canada (Wedding Crashers)
Maggie Geha (Gotham)
Rachael MacFarlane (American Dad)

John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) has been divorced from Lori Collins for six months. Meanwhile, his best friend Ted (Seth MacFarlane), marries his girlfriend, Tami-Lynn (Jessica Barth). One year later, with their marriage is beginning to break-down so they decide to have a child. As Ted can not have children, John agrees to help Ted find a sperm donor, They asked Sam J. Jones but he refuses due to a low sperm count, they try unsuccessfully to break into Tom Brady’s house and steal his sperm. Ultimately, John offers to donate his sperm.Despite Ted and John’s efforts, Tami-Lynn’s historical drug use has rendered her infertile and the couple decide to adopt. As background checks are carried out, Ted brings his legal status as a person into question. The state authorities of Massachusetts declare Ted property rather than a person, resulting in the loss of his job at a grocery store – shortly after reassuring a customer (Liam Neeson) that buying a box of Trix, as an adult, will not bring him to any harm. Furthermore, his marriage to Tami-Lynn is annulled.John suggests that they take the state to court, and their case is assigned to a novice lawyer pro-bono, Samantha Leslie Jackson (Amanda Seyfried). The three bond over their love of marijuana as they prepare to present the case.Meanwhile, Donny (Giovanni Ribisi), Ted’s life-long stalker and would-be abductor, is now employed as a janitor at the headquarters of toy company Hasbro, in New York City. He convinces the company CEO to hire an expert attorney (John Slattery) to ensure that Ted maintains his status as property, therefore leaving him open to seizure by the firm to create more living teddy bears.Despite Samantha’s best efforts, the court rules against Ted. Disheartened but desperate, the trio contact Patrick Meighan (Morgan Freeman), a highly respected civil rights attorney, hoping he’ll take the case and overturn the court’s decision. Driving to Manhattan to meet him, Ted crashes into a hidden marijuana patch, where Samantha and John realize their attraction for each other. The next day, the trio meet Meighan, who is sympathetic to Ted’s plight but ultimately refuses the case, as he believes he has not significantly contributed to humanity due to his juvenile slacker lifestyle.Ted, angry at the injustice and jealous of Samantha and John’s new relationship, runs off. Donny follows him as he wanders into the New York Comic-Con. Once inside, Donny attempts to kidnap Ted, who flees and contacts John for help. John and Samantha arrive at Comic-Con and search for Ted, arriving as Donny is about to cut him open. As they make their escape, Donny cuts the cables holding up a model of the USS Enterprise and it swings towards Ted. John pushes Ted out of the way, takes the hit, and is knocked unconscious. Ted identifies Donny and he is arrested.At the hospital, Samantha, Ted and Tami-Lynn rejoice when John recovers. Patrick Meighan decides to take the case, telling them he has been inspired by John’s selflessness and Ted’s emotions over his fallen friend. Meighan gets the ruling overturned by demonstrating that Ted is self-aware, that he feels complex emotions, and is capable of empathy. Outside the court, Ted re-proposes to Tami-Lynn. After they are re-married, Ted and Tami-Lynn, adopting the surname of “Clubberlang”, adopt a baby boy, whom they name Apollo Creed, while John and Samantha happily pursue their own relationship.A good laugh, even  better than the original in my opinion. If you like Ted/Family Guy/other Seth Macfarlane shows, I’d definitely recommend this

 

REVIEW: PAN

CAST

Levi Miller (Jasper Jones)
Hugh Jackman (Logan)
Garrett Hedlund (Tron: LEgacy)
Rooney Mara (Side Effects)
Adeel Akhtar (The Dictator)
Nonso Anozie (Dracula)
Amanda Seyfried (Jennifer’s Body)
Kathy Burke (Flushed Away)
Lewis MacDougall (A Monster Calls)
Jack Charles (Tom White)
Cara Delevingne (Sucide Squad)
Paul Kaye (Game of Thrones)

Newborn Peter (Levi Miller) is left by his mother Mary (Amanda Seyfried) on the steps of an orphanage in London, an establishment under the care of Mother Barnabas (Kathy Burke). Several years later, during World War II, upon learning that Mother Barnabas is hoarding food for herself, Peter and his best friend Nibs (Lewis MacDougall) try to steal it to distribute amongst themselves and the other orphans but they are caught. In the process, Peter finds a letter written by his mother, declaring her love and assuring Peter they will meet again “in this world or another”.In retaliation for the boys’ mischief, Mother Barnabas summons pirates who kidnap Peter, Nibs and several others. Nibs manages to escape but Peter does not. He is captured and taken aboard a flying pirate ship. Following an aerial battle with several Spitfires the ship takes Peter to Neverland, a magical realm beyond space and time, where he is forced to become a slave laborer and mine for Pixum (crystallized Fairy Dust) on behalf of the terrible pirate Blackbeard (Hugh Jackman) who uses it to prevent himself from aging. Peter befriends another miner, named James Hook (Garrett Hedlund). After insulting Blackbeard’s men, Peter is forced to walk the plank over the deep mine, but survives by flying. Blackbeard then tells Peter about an old prophecy that a boy who could fly would one day kill him, but Peter refuses to believe he is that boy.Peter joins Hook and his accomplice, Sam “Smee” Smiegel (Adeel Akhtar), stealing one of Blackbeard’s flying ships and escaping into the forest. There they are found by the native chief’s daughter Tiger Lily (Rooney Mara) and nearly executed but when the natives Chief Great Little Panther (Jack Charles) notices Peter’s pan flute pendant, left to him by Mary, and said to belong to their people’s greatest hero, the legendary Pan. With the Memory Tree, Tiger Lily tells Peter that many years ago when the natives and the fairies united to fight together against the pirates, the Fairy Prince and the love of Blackbeard’s life, Mary fell in love but when Blackbeard discovered them, the Prince took human form to rescue Mary. But as fairies could only live in the form of a human for one day, the Prince sacrificed his life for Mary. Mary was then forced to hide their newborn son Peter in the other world and seek shelter in the Fairy Kingdom when she and the fairies had to retreat. As part of his heritage, Peter has the ability to fly, but is unable to do so because of his lack of faith.Fearful of Blackbeard’s punishment, Smee betrays the natives’ location to him, and in the ensuing battle, Chief Great Little Panther is murdered by Blackbeard, who also reveals that he killed Peter’s mother. Peter is hurt to learn that Tiger Lily had lied to Peter, telling him his mother is alive but she explains that he would have walked away from his destiny if he knew the truth.Peter, Hook, and Tiger Lily escape in a raft and head to the Fairy Kingdom to enlist their help in defeating the pirates. Along the way, Peter falls into the river and is nearly eaten by giant crocodiles before being rescued by the mermaids, after which he has a vision of Blackbeard accidentally killing Mary as she defended the Fairy Kingdom from his offensive. Despondent over their chances, Hook leaves while Peter and Tiger Lily arrive at the Fairy Kingdom only to be ambushed by Blackbeard who plans to use the fairies vast amount of Pixum to live forever. Blackbeard takes Peter’s pan flute pendant, which is the key to the fairy kingdom, opens their gates and launches an attack.Peter escapes and befriends one of the fairies, named Tinker Bell. Together, they rally the rest of the Neverland fairies to fight the pirates while Tiger Lily duels Blackbeard. Hook returns on the stolen ship and fights Blackbeard’s right-hand man Bishop (Nonso Anozie) until the ship tips over, sending both falling to their deaths. Peter conquers his fears and flies to save Hook, while Blackbeard and his men are overpowered by the fairies. Forced into an abyss, they subsequently fall to their deaths. Smee is the sole survivor having fled during the battle. Peter then sees a vision of Mary, who reaffirms him to be Neverland’s savior: Peter Pan. Shortly afterwards, Peter and Hook, now the captain of the Jolly Roger, return to London to rescue Nibs and the other orphans, who become part of Peter’s crew, the Lost Boys. In the final scene, Peter and Hook reaffirm their friendship, certain that nothing will ever go wrong between them.A totally different side of the Peter Pan story. Unique and imaginative. Non stop action packed and Hugh Jackman like you’ve never seen him before. A talented cast and brilliant production.

REVIEW: AMERICAN DAD – VOLUME 4-6

Related image

MAIN CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Family Guy)
Wendy Schaal (Small Soldiers)
Scott Grimes (Robin Hood)
Rachael MacFarlane (The Batman)
Dee Bradley Baker (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)

RECURRING / NOTABLE GUEST CAST

Curtis Armstrong (New Girl)
Seth Green (Austin Powers)
Ivana Milicevic (Banshee)
Swoosie Kurtz (Mike & Molly)
Jeff Fischer (Happy Feet)
Sandra Bernhard (2 Broke Girls)
Kevin Michael Richardson (The Cleveland Show)
Eddie Kaye Thomas (American Pie)
Patrick Stewart (X-Men)
Daisuke Suzuki (I Am Gangster)
David Koechner (Anchorman)
Raven-Symone (Dr. Dolittle)
Mike Henry (The Cleveland Show)
Richard Gant (Godzilla)
Ed Helms (The Hangover)
Ari Graynor (Bad Teacher TV)
Elizabeth Banks (The Hunger Games)
John DiMaggio (Futurama)
J.K. Simmons (Whiplash)
Jean Smart (Smanatha Who?)
Lizzy Caplan (Cloverfield)
Josh Gad (Frozen)
Lisa Edelstein (House)
Jon Cryer (Two and a Half Men)
Niecy Nash (Scream Queens)
Henry Rollins (Wrong Turn 2)
Forest Whitaker (Panic Room)
Kelli Garner (Horns)
Ken Jeong (The Hangover)
Jon Tenney (Green Lantern)
Megyn Price (Grounded for Life)
Daran Norris (Izombie)
Judd Hirsch (A Beautiful Mind)
Amy Sedaris (Elf)
Grey DeLisle (The Replacements)
Glenn Howerton (That 80s Show)
Bob Odenkirk (How I Met Your Mother)
Suzanne Cryer (Two Guys & a Girl)
Brian Doyle-Murray (Groundhog Day)
Estelle Harris (3rd Rock From The Sun)
Robet Patrick (Terminator 2)
Ricardo Montalban (Star Trek II)
Dan Folger (Fanboys)
Clancy Brown (Highlander)
Harve Presnell (Lois & Clark)
Rob Riggle (21 Jump Street)
Barret Swatek (Power Rangers Turbo)
Zach Galifianakis (The Hangover)
Kat Dennings (2 Broke Girls)
Donald Faison (Scrubs)
Tom Kenny (The Batman)
Andy Samberg (Hot Rod)
Richard Kind (Gotham)
Emmanuelle Chriqui (Wrong Turn)
Bryan Cranston (Argo)
Sandra Oh (Sideways)
Kevin Nealon (Weeds)
Bobby Cannavale (Ant-Man)
Cleo King (Mike & Molly)
Ioan Grufford (Fantastic Four)
Kevin Durand (Dark Angel)
Amanda Seyfried (Ted 2)

American Dad is on fire at the moment. I’ve always enjoyed it, but it has lived in the shadow of it’s bigger brother, ‘Family Guy’, since it began.

This volume has such highlights as…

Image result

TEARJERKER: In this James Bond parody, Stan plays a 007-type secret agent sent to stop the diabolical Tearjerker (played by Roger) from fulfilling his master plan to create a movie so sad that it causes anyone who watches it to cry themselves to death.

WIDOWMAKER: Francine pushes Stan to open up to her emotionally but, after a few psychiatrist sessions with Roger, he is more touchy-feely than she can handle when he tells her he killed her friend’s husband. Meanwhile, Steve vows vengeance when Hayley kills the queen bee from his science project.

OFFICE SPACEMAN: When the CIA initiates an Alien Task Force, a peculiar twist of fate puts Roger in charge of the task force in disguise, who marks Stan as an alien to protect his own identity. Meanwhile, Francine freaks out when she finds Steve with a black girl as his study-buddy, but reveals that she did not freak out because Steve’s study-buddy is black, but because she is left-handed.

STANNY SLICKERS II: THE LEGEND OF OLLIE’S GOLD: After officially dying and coming back to life, Stan decides to leave a legacy on the world and begins to search for legendary buried treasure. As the search for gold goes “North”, life at home heads south as Hayley becomes addicted to body-piercing, Steve turns the vacuum into a robotic girlfriend, and Roger hatches a scam to get sexually harassed at work so he can win an out-of-court settlement.

SPRING BREAK-UP: Stan has a spring break-induced mid-life crisis. With Francine away visiting her parents, Roger (as “Scotch Bingington”) invites Spring Breakers to party at the Smith household. But Stan nearly has a “Spring Breakdown” when he falls prey to a sexy booze-cruiser and Steve tries to lose his virginity to actress Carmen Selectra.

1600 CANDLES: Roger becomes excited when he turns 1600, and he spies on his family as they prepare to throw a birthday party for him. Much to his dismay, Roger is interrupted when Steve runs down the stairs and reveals to the family that he has grown his first pubic hair. Stan and Francine become horrified when they hear of the news, and they begin to take drastic measures to deal with Steve’s puberty after having reoccurring memories of when Hayley began menstruating, which is what turned her aggressive. While Francine desperately goes to the CIA to get some aging retardant, Steve makes plans with Lisa Silver to meet up at a Macy’s. During his sleep, Francine injects the aging retardant, only to wake up to him morphing into a toddler. Steve becomes enraged when he sees this, and Lisa Silver angrily walks out of the store. Steve is given another opportunity as going with Lisa, this time as the school prom. Stan and Francine later inject a different serum into Steve during his sleep. However, much to their dismay, Steve is an elder. Stan and Francine later drops Steve off at his school, and give him the antidote. Some of the school bullies later give Steve a swirly, claiming that the first pubic hair is nothing special, and the hair is blown out the window, drifts across the town, only to finally land onto Roger’s birthday cake

THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY: The Smith family schedule an intervention to tackle down Roger’s rampant alcoholism. When Roger arrives drunk at the house, they also mention his tendency to have an inferiority complex from wearing his various costumes and personas. Ignoring their worries, Roger goes shopping for beer, only to find out that his credit card has maxed out. He later investigates who the culprit is, revealing to be Sidney Hoffman. He vows to make Hoffman’s life a living hell, and he gets Hoffman unemployed, sets his apartment on fire, and breaks up with his fiancée. At his home, Roger discovers that Sidney Hoffman is the same person as he is. Unknown to him, Sidney has hired a hitman to kill him. While at a department store, the Sidney Hoffman persona confronts Roger in a dressing room. Hoffman is later killed from being stabbed by Roger, and Hoffman’s ex is seen holding hands with Roger, revealing to him that she’s a hermaphrodite

ONE LITTLE WORD: Stan becomes envious that he does not get any special treatment after seeing a coworker dine with his boss, Avery Bullock, at the executive lounge. He is finally given the opportunity to become Bullock’s personal assistant after Stan’s coworker refused to stand in line to get Bullock opera tickets due to personal issues. Bullock leaves his son, Avery Jr., in the care of Francine on various occasions, in which she later is on the verge of an mental breakdown. Stan accompanies his boss on various errands, including picking up women for sex and retrieving his wife from being held captive by terrorists in Fallujah. When the ordeal ends, Francine and Stan plan their Valentine’s Day trip to an old honeymoon spot. When they arrive, Francine finds out that Stan has been harboring Bullock’s son, as well as his mistress in a nearby cabin in an attempt to hide her from his wife. Bullock’s wife, infuriated by his betrayal, shoots him in the knee and takes Avery Jr. home with her. In pain, Bullock pleads Stan to call the paramedics, but Stan blatantly refuses. He carries Francine out of the cabin and proceeds to kiss her. Dick is currently Bullock’s number one

CHOOSEY WIVES CHOOSEY SMITH:Stan announces to Francine that he has become a registered pilot, much to her dismay. Francine reveals to Stan that before meeting him, she was once engaged to a pilot who has been presumed dead. When the pilot, named Travis, suddenly is found to be alive, she had already reengaged to Stan. Stan becomes upset and envious that Francine was with another man prior to him, and he tracks Travis down. When Roger and him arrive in Montana, Travis is found to be a wealthy rancher. Stan returns to Langley Falls to reveal to Francine that he has tracked down Travis in order to see his qualities. He struggles to schedule events, even going as far as to plan a dinner. Frustrated, Francine does not settle and tells Stan that she loves him. Stan, reluctant to believe her, sets up a staged crash with Roger and fakes his death. They arrive and relax at a remote island, only to be washed up by a tsunami. After being stranded out at sea for three months, Stan and Roger are saved, and they return home. Francine is ecstatic to see Stan, only to have Travis walk into their reunion. Francine later reveals that she faked having a relationship with Travis in an attempt to make Stan jealous. Angry, Travis leaves the house. Meanwhile, Steve finds a stray cat. He tries on various occasions to befriend the cat, only to be the victim of multiple attacks

ESCAPE FROM PEARL BAILEY: Steve gets back together with his former ex-girlfriend Debbie, much to the jealousy of his friends. His rival, Lisa Silver, organizes a campaign to become the student council president of the school. Debbie devises a plan to run against Lisa, much to her frustration. Lisa warns her that she vows to humiliate her if she makes a successful campaign. A slander post was made by Lisa and her friends in an attempt to humiliate Debbie, enraging Steve. Steve initiates a plot to gain revenge for his girlfriend, which includes infecting one of Lisa’s stuffed animals with herpes. Debbie is horrified when he tells her about this, and she ends their relationship. Steve soon realizes Snot, Toshi and Barry made the slander post and framed Lisa and her friends. As soon as Steve is later found to be the culprit of the plan, and his friends behind the slander post, the whole school chases them down. They stumble upon an empty room, only to find Debbie and her friends. Steve explains to her why he went through with the plan, and Debbie reluctantly accepts his apology. Steve and his friends manage to escape from the school, where Francine is waiting for them. However, the whole school corners them, and they mercilessly attack them.

PULLING DOUBLE BOOTY: Hayley goes on a rampage shortly after Jeff breaks up with her. Francine and Stan try to help their daughter get through the grief, as the police have informed them that she will go to jail if she has another rampage. Francine later peeps into Hayley’s room one night, only to find her making out with a person that closely resembles Stan. Disturbed and horrified, she confronts Stan only for the look-alike to come out with Hayley. The look-alike, named Bill, is later caught by Stan after an attempt to have sex with Francine. They kick him out of the house, and Stan vows to act as Bill to prevent Hayley from going on another rampage. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve get summer jobs of determining the gender of baby chicks.Image result for american dad most adequate christmasIf you’re new to American Dad, this is where the best material lies (so far).

American Dad! is one of those shows that just keeps getting better. The show got off to a rocky start in its first series, definitely being born into its older brother Family Guy’s shadow, but since then it has slowly turned into its own show, with its own style of comedy. This sets highlights are ..Image result for american dad phantom of the telethonPHANTOM OF THE TELETHON: Stan learns that the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) can no longer afford torture devices as the Democrats are shifting money to teaching inner city children to read. While Stan tries to come up with ideas for revenue-raising inventions, Roger suggests that the CIA hold a telethon, which Stan says is a stupid idea. The next day however, Stan then suggests a telethon and takes all the credit and does not admit that it was Roger’s idea, despite his protests that it was.

STAN TIME: Feeling exhausted all the time, Stan begins taking pills that allow him to stay up all night and feel like he had a full night’s sleep. He tries to use his newfound energy and time on hobbies, only to ultimately discover he would rather spend more time with his wife. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve are asked to make a screenplay for a pornographic film.

FAMILY AFFAIR: Roger has been making excuses about prior commitments, prompting the Smiths to realize that he has been “cheating” on them with other families. The Smiths take action to teach Roger a lesson about monogamy until Roger discovers for himself why he is not a one-family kind of guy

LIVE AND LET FRY: When Langley Falls implements a ban on trans fats, Stan finds himself legally separated from his favorite foods. He sets a poor example for the rest of the family when he blatantly disregards the law by crossing county lines and using Steve as a trans-fatty food mule to satisfy his own gluttonous desires

JACK’S BACK: Steve signs Stan up for a father-son bike tournament, but the plan veers off-track when Stan admits that his father never taught him how to ride a bike. Determined to make things better, Steve helps reconcile Stan with his convict father. Meanwhile, Hayley needs internship credit for school, so Roger hires her to bar tend at his makeshift bar in the attic

WIFE INSURANCE: When Stan gets kidnapped in Colombia, Francine fears he is gone for good. Stan finally reappears unharmed, but the real trouble erupts in the Smith household when he admits that he has a plan to marry his dentist if Francine dies before him. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger play detective duo “Wheels and the Legman.”

WEINER OF OUR DISCONTENT: Stan has had enough of Roger’s antics! When he calls Roger out, Roger claims he has been sent to Earth to determine the fate of mankind. Stan challenges him to prove it, and is tickled pink when he learns Roger’s real purpose for being on Earth. Roger struggles to get a grip on reality until a fateful turn of events helps put things in perspective.

e show is hilarious, every episode makes you laugh. American dad is amazing, watch it. Roger is so funny its unbelievable.

It’s a show that continues to fly under the radar of many, and as those who have enjoyed the exploits of American Dad! will happily tell you, that’s very much their loss. For this is a golden animated series, aimed firmly at grown ups, and bursting with quotable lines. Episode Highlights are ….

IN COUNTRY..CLUB: Stan teaches Steve that the only way he can truly appreciate the national anthem is by participating in a war re-enactment, but the experience leaves Steve looking and acting like a traumatized Vietnam War veteran. Meanwhile, Roger gets a pet bird and badgers Stan into giving him a cable code so he can watch a Barbra Streisand pay-per-view special. And an amputee mental patient who has psychic powers, named John Q. Mind (Randy Spears), escapes from a mental hospital on a motorcycle.

MOON OVER ISLA ISLAND: In order to get a promotion at work, Stan has to convince the dictator of Isla Island to sign a treaty. Stan meets the general and accidentally kills him and has Roger pose as the leader of the small island nation. Meanwhile, Steve and Snot compete for the sexual advances of each other’s mothers.

HOME ADRONE: Steve is left home alone when the family takes a trip to look at a potential college for Hayley. When his friends arrive and realize he has the run of the house, they persuade Steve to break the rules. They’re soon in over their heads when they discover that what they thought was a video game is actually a military controlled drone. As Hayley’s flight is about to leave, the pilot sees the drone, and delays the flight for safety of the passengers. As Steve and his friends attempt to cover their tracks, Roger has a meltdown that keeps the family from making their trip by dressing as Stan instead of a little girl to get alcohol. The Air Marshall threatens to kill everyone unless the little girl (Roger) is found. Stan returns to find that Steve has betrayed his trust and thrust them into a high-level security situation.

MAN IN THE MOONBOUNCE: Steve must become the “man of the house” when Stan relives his childhood after an emotional breakdown on a moonbounce – and ends up in Chimdale Minimum Security prison for vandalizing a house. Meanwhile, Hayley gives Klaus a wig so he can have his first haircut in years.

SHALLOW VOWS: When Stan lets it slip that he only married Francine for her looks days before they renew their wedding vows, Francine purposely lets herself go so she can see if Stan really does love her. Meanwhile, Steve and Hayley go on the run when one of Roger’s personalities threatens to kill them.

G-STRING CIRCUS: Stan opens up a dry-cleaning shop with 20-year-old strippers as the workers to prove Hayley should take his advice, but when Stan’s business goes south, Stan decides to take off his own clothes for money. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends go to space camp (which turns out to be boring) and try to escape when he sees a webcam shot of Roger housing Stan’s stripper dry-cleaning workers in Steve’s room.

RAPTURE’S DELIGHT: Stan is upset when he cannot find his family a good seat for a Christmas Day church service, but that proves to be the least of his worries when Stan discovers that he, Roger, and Francine are the last people left on Earth and everyone else has ascended into Heaven as part of the Biblical end of days.

A JONES FOR A SMITH:  Stan gives Francine a hard time when she is sentenced to work in a soup kitchen following a drunk driving arrest (since Stan does not believe social programs that help the homeless and impoverished are of any value to American society), but when Stan gets hooked on crack cocaine, he refuses to get help (and costs Steve a chance to hook up with a beautiful high school girl who’s attracted to nerds), but later he discovers that asking others for help does not hurt.

MAY THE BEST STAN WIN: Stan gives Francine “love coupons” for Valentine’s Day, but refuses to honor them once he becomes preoccupied with his very own CIA cyborg. Meanwhile, Roger helps Steve and his friends remake a classic ’80s movie.

RETURN OF THE BLING: Roger reveals that he played on the gold-medal-winning Miracle on Ice 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team as a steroid-abuser. Stan is able to convince Roger to return his Olympic gold medal, but Roger has a difficult time dealing with the loss. Meanwhile, Hayley reevaluates her relationship status with Reginald the Koala.

COPS AND ROGER: Roger joins the police force after he and Francine are mugged, but he turns into a dirty cop, and Hayley gets a new friend.

MERLOT DOWN DIRTY SHAME: Roger winds up kissing Francine when the two go wine-tasting, leading Francine having to tell Stan so it’s not bad if they told soon, but Roger tries everything to keep Francine from telling Stan. Meanwhile, Klaus and Hayley screw with Steve’s head by making him think his reality is a lucid dream, but he goes too far when he tries to fly out the window.

GREAT SPACE ROASTER: It is Roger’s birthday, and he begs to be roasted, but Roger takes the cruel jokes to heart and goes on a rampage against the Smith family.Image result for american dad great space roaster

American Dad is very firmly in its stride here, with the maturity of the show working in its favor. It’s a little American-centric at times, as you might expect from the show’s title and origin, but it’s still always accessible. In fact, it’s more than that. American Dad! is arguably one of the most underappreciated television shows of the modern era. And if you’re in any doubt of that, there’s an abundance of evidence in this box set waiting to be uncovered.

REVIEW: DEAR JOHN

 

CAST

Channing Tatum (21 Jump Street)
Amanda Seyfried (Red Riding Hood)
Richard jenkins (Cabin In The Woods)
Henry Thomas (E.T.)
D.J. Contana (Venom)
Cullen Moss (The Notebook)
Keith Robinson (Power Rangers Lightspeed Rescue)
Scott Porter (Speed Racer)
Leslea Fisher (The Campaign)

While serving in the United States Army Special Forces in 2007, John Tyree, a Staff Sergeant, is lying on the ground after being shot multiple times with his comrades around him. In a voice over, he recalls a childhood trip to the U.S. Mint and compares himself to a coin in the United States Military before stating that the last thing he thought of before he blacked out was “you.”

In 2001, John is on vacation in Charleston, South Carolina while on leave. He meets Savannah Curtis, a college student on spring break, when he fetches her purse from the ocean. She invites him to a bonfire party where he meets her neighbor, Tim Wheddon and his son Alan. Over the course of two weeks, they go on several dates and fall in love. Savannah also meets John’s father, who is obsessed with his coin collection.

Savannah mentions to John that his father, like Alan, may have high-functioning autism. This upsets John who storms off. Savannah’s friend Randy, who also has a crush on her, makes a comment that provokes John to fight and he accidentally punches Tim. Savannah sees the commotion and stops speaking to him. John apologizes to Tim, who offers to give Savannah a message. She drives to John’s house to spend one last day together.

John and Savannah continue their relationship through letters. Savannah spends more time with Tim and decides she wants to work with children with autism, and plans to build a farm and horse stables where they can enjoy the outdoors and animals. They expect to build a life together when John leaves the army, but after the September 11 attacks, he re-enlists. Over the next two years, the romance goes on through their letters and one turns out to be a Dear John letter that she is engaged to someone else. John burns all of Savannah’s letters.

Despite being wounded and encouraged to return home, John re-enlists. After four more years, while waiting to receive orders on his unit’s next deployment, John is informed that his father had a stroke. When John arrives at the hospital he learns that his father is alive but in grave condition. John writes a letter to his father, which he reads to him at the hospital; John’s voice over at the beginning of the film was from this letter, in which he told his father that the first thing to cross his mind after he was shot was coins, and the last thing to cross his mind before he lost consciousness was his dad. Soon afterwards, his father dies.

John visits Savannah and learns that she has married Tim and abandoned her dream of a riding camp for kids with autism because of Tim’s fight against lymphoma. John goes with her to visit Tim in the hospital. Tim tells John that Savannah still loves John. John sells all of his father’s coin collection except the mule that John found, to raise money, which could help Tim in his treatment. Back in the army, John uses the mule as a charm. He receives a letter from Savannah telling him that Tim died after two months. John, now a civilian, sees Savannah at a coffee shop and they hug.

Whilst this film won’t change your life or cause you to reassess your understanding of love; this is a great film with some honestly touching moments. I recommend this to everyone.

 

REVIEW: JENNIFER’S BODY

CAST

Megan Fox (New Girl)
Amanda Seyfried (Ted 2)
Johnny Simmons (The Spirit)
Adam Brody (Scream 4)
Christ Pratt (Jurassic World)
Kyle Gallner (Verronica Mars)
J.K Simmons (Terminator Genisys)
Cynthia Stevenson (Dead Like Me)
Lance Henriksen (Legends of Tomorrow)

Anita “Needy” Lesnicki, once an insecure and bookish teenager living near Devil’s Kettle, Minnesota, is now a violent mental inmate who narrates the story as a flashback while in solitary confinement. She has been friends with a selfish and popular cheerleader, Jennifer Check, since childhood, despite having little in common. One night, Jennifer takes Needy to a local dive bar to attend a concert by indie rock band Low Shoulder. A suspicious fire engulfs the bar, killing several people, and Jennifer, who is in shock, agrees to leave with the band despite Needy’s protests. Later that evening, Jennifer, covered in blood, appears in Needy’s kitchen and proceeds to eat food from the refrigerator. Unable to digest the matter, she vomits a trail of black, spiny fluid and then leaves in a hurry as Needy calls after her.

The next morning at school, Jennifer appears fine and shrugs off Needy’s concerns. While the whole town is devastated by the deaths caused by the fire, Jennifer seduces the school’s football captain in the woods and then kills him; his disemboweled corpse is later found. Meanwhile, the members of Low Shoulder gain popularity due to their rumored heroism during the fire and offer to make a charity appearance at the school’s spring formal.
A month later, Jennifer is beginning to look pale, and accepts a date with school goth/emo Colin, whom she brutally kills that night. While Needy and her boyfriend, Chip, have sex, Needy senses something dreadful has happened. She leaves in a panic and almost runs over Jennifer, drenched in blood. She rushes home and finds Jennifer in her bedroom. Jennifer kisses her, initiating a brief makeout session, and soon explains what happened after the fire: Low Shoulder took her into the woods and offered her as a virgin sacrifice to Satan in exchange for fame and fortune. Although the sacrifice and greedy exchange were a success, Jennifer was in fact not a virgin, and when the lead singer Nikolai murdered her, the ritual backfired and a demonic spirit took over her body. Unbeknownst to Needy, Jennifer also encountered the Indian exchange student Ahmet after the fire and, upon hearing that no one knew he had survived, took him into the woods and ate him, rendering him her first victim. Jennifer states that she can withstand virtually any injury without pain and is rather difficult to kill.
The next day at school, as the town is stunned by Colin’s death, Needy goes to the school library’s occult section and surmises that Jennifer is a succubus; she is weakest when she is hungry, and must feed on flesh in order to sustain her life and appearance. Needy tells Chip about her discoveries and warns him not to attend the school dance. He does not believe her and she subsequently breaks up with him in order to protect him. Chip goes to the dance, hoping to meet with Needy, but is instead intercepted by Jennifer, who seduces him and takes him to an abandoned pool house. Needy arrives there and finds Jennifer feeding on Chip. Needy tries to drown Jennifer but Jennifer, hovering in the air, attacks her. She is then stabbed by Chip with a pool skimmer. Jennifer escapes while Needy watches her boyfriend die.

Needy decides she must kill Jennifer for the common good. She goes to Jennifer’s home and sees Jennifer picking out her next victims in her yearbook. Crashing through the window, Needy engages in a fight with Jennifer wielding a box cutter. Culminating with a stab to the heart, Needy finally destroys the demon and kills her. Jennifer’s mother enters and finds Needy with the box cutter on top of her daughter’s body. Soon after, Needy is brought to an asylum. Since she was bitten non-fatally by Jennifer, she has obtained some of Jennifer’s supernatural powers, such as the ability to hover in the air. Set upon revenge for what was done to Jennifer and her, she escapes the mental facility and hitchhikes a ride to the hotel where Low Shoulder are staying; there, she slaughters the members, whose killings are later discovered by local authorities.

A fun quirky film that is greatly underrated

 

REVIEW: ALPHA DOG

CAST

Emile Hirsch (Speed Racer)
Justin Timberlake (The Social Network)
Ben Foster (The Punisher)
Shawn Hatosy (The Faculty)
Anton Yelchin (Star Trek)
Sharon Stone (Total Recall)
Bruce Willis (Die Hard)
Chris Marquette (Freddy vs Jason)
Dominique Swain (Praire Fever)
Olivia Wilde (Cowboys & Aliens)
Amanda Seyfried (Ted 2)
Vincent Kartheiser (Angel)
Lukas Haas (Mars Attacks)
Heather Wahlquist (John Q)
Harry Dean Stanton (Avengers Assemble)
Joshua Alba (Unrest)
Amber Heard (Zombieland)

Johnny Truelove is a young marijuana dealer living in Southern California. His father, Sonny, supplies him with marijuana, which Johnny distributes to his gang of friends, including Jake Mazursky, who owes Johnny a $1,200 drug debt. Mazursky makes a failed attempt at asking his father, Butch, and stepmother Olivia for the money. Meanwhile, Butch and Olivia are dealing with their rebellious teenage son Zack- Jake’s half-brother. A fight breaks out between Jake and Johnny when Jake tries to pay Johnny only part of his debt. After back and forth retaliation, Johnny and his two henchmen, Frankie Ballenbacher and Tiko Martinez, go to confront Jake in person, but when they go to his house he is nowhere to be found. As they leave, they find Zack walking and decide to kidnap him with the intent of holding onto him until Jake pays his debt.
Wanting a break from his home life, Zack makes no effort to escape. Johnny pawns Zack off on Frankie, who offers him a chance to escape, but Zack declines the offer, not wanting to cause any trouble for his brother. Zack stays with Frankie at his father’s house, and the two strike up an unlikely friendship. The next day, he ingratiates himself with Frankie’s friends, including Keith Stratten and Julie, the youngest member of the group. A number of friends of the gang learn of Zack’s kidnapping, though Susan is the only one who seems concerned. Frankie grows nervous when Johnny tells him they could be in serious trouble for the kidnapping, and hypothetically offers him $2,500 to murder Zack. Frankie furiously declines and Johnny claims it was just a joke. Instead, Johnny agrees to Frankie’s plan to pay Zack to keep his mouth shut. However, after a threatening phone call from Jake, and his lawyer who reveals that he could face life in prison for kidnapping, he decides the risk of ending up dead or in prison is too great to let Zack go. Johnny calls Elvis Schmidt and offers to erase his drug debt if he kills Zack. Frankie and his friends still believe Zack will be returning home at the end of the night and throw a raucous going away party. Zack has a good time at the party and later goes skinny-dipping with Julie and her friend Alma in the pool, which leads to a three-some. After the party, Julie gives Zack her number and Alma gives him a good-bye kiss on the cheek.
Elvis arrives at the hotel where Zack is waiting to be picked up, and Frankie and Elvis begin to argue when Elvis reveals that Johnny has sent him there to kill Zack. Frankie ends up leaving, and Elvis takes Keith to dig a grave. Frankie offers Zack a final opportunity to escape, but believing that he is now part of the group and will be returning home soon, Zack prefers to wait at the hotel for Elvis to return. Meanwhile, Sonny, Cosmo (Johnny’s godfather), and Johnny’s lawyer confront Johnny, who refuses to call off the hit. Elvis and Keith return to the hotel, and Frankie and Elvis go outside to talk. Frankie, reluctant because of the friendship he has formed with Zack, finally relents when Elvis tells him they could face life in prison if Zack tells someone what happened.
Frankie, Elvis, Zack, and Keith arrive at the grave site. Zack is not aware of what’s going on and grows suspicious when a deeply saddened Keith tells Frankie he can’t go through with it, and goes to wait in the car after giving Zack a goodbye hug. Zack sees the grave and begins to break down, begging Frankie and Elvis to let him go. Frankie tells Elvis they shouldn’t go through with it, but Elvis is keen on the job he’s been given. Frankie calms Zack down, and ties him up with duct tape. He is surprised when Elvis knocks Zack into the grave with a shovel, and shoots him multiple times with an automatic Tec 9, killing him.
Zack’s body is found three days later. The epilogue shows the aftermath of the crime: Olivia, now suffering from obesity and depression, is interviewed, and talks candidly about her failed suicide attempts and the loss that she has experienced from her son’s death. Susan angrily confronts Frankie over Zack’s death and goes to the authorities. Elvis is caught while trying to secure a ride out of L.A. Johnny flees the city and arrives at the house of old classmate Buzz Fecske, who drives him back to his godfather Cosmo’s house, where he enters and is not seen again. Tiko, Keith and Frankie are arrested. After being convicted, they all serve their respective sentences: Tiko serves nine years in prison for kidnapping; Keith serves time at a juvenile facility until the age of 25 for digging Zack’s grave; Frankie serves seven years to life for kidnapping and second-degree murder; and Elvis is put on death row for murdering Zack. Johnny, however, is nowhere to be found. The interviewer asks Sonny how Johnny was able to escape authorities for four years without help, but Sonny assures him that he doesn’t know where Johnny is. In 2005, after over five years of being on the America’s most wanted list, Johnny is finally found and arrested in Paraguay. Text informs the audience that Johnny is in California awaiting trial, and, if proven guilty, faces the death penalty.
Alpha Dog is based on the real life story of LA drug dealer Jesse James Hollywood who may just have a sillier name than his onscreen counterpart.  The story jumps around a lot but there are some very well filmed and well acted moments that make this better than just another LA crime film.

12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS REVIEW: MEAN GIRLS 1 & 2

CAST

Lindsay Lohan (Freaky Friday)
Rachel McAdams (Sherlock Holmes)
Tina Fey (Date Night)
Tim Meadows (Son of Zorn)
Amy Poehler (Parks and Recreation)
Ana Gasteyer (Suburgatory)
Lacey Chabert (Not Another Teen Movie)
Lizzy Caplan (Cloverfield)
Neil Flynn (Scrubs)
Amanda Seyfried (Ted 2)

Sixteen-year-old homeschooled Cady Heron (Lindsay Lohan) and her zoologist parents (Ana Gasteyer and Neil Flynn) return to the United States after a 12-year research trip in Africa, settling in Evanston, Illinois. Cady attends a public school for the first time, meeting new classmates Janis (Lizzy Caplan) and Damien (Daniel Franzese). The two warn Cady to avoid the school’s most exclusive clique, the Plastics, who are led by queen bee Regina George (Rachel McAdams). The Plastics take an interest in Cady, however, and start to invite her to sit with them at lunch. Seeing that Cady is slowly becoming one of The Plastics, Janis hatches a plan of revenge against Regina, using Cady as the infiltrator.Cady soon learns about Regina’s “Burn Book”, a notebook filled with rumors, secrets, and gossip about the other girls and some teachers. Cady also falls in love with Regina’s ex-boyfriend, Aaron Samuels (Jonathan Bennett), whom a jealous Regina steals back at a Halloween party. Cady continues with Janis’s plan to cut off Regina’s “resources”, which involve separating her from Aaron; tricking her into eating nutrition bars that make her gain weight; and turning Regina’s fellow Plastics – insecure rich girl Gretchen Wieners (Lacey Chabert) and sweet but ditzy Karen Smith (Amanda Seyfried) – against her. In the process, Cady unwittingly remakes herself in Regina’s image, becoming spiteful, superficial, and abandons Janis and Damian.

When Regina is finally made aware of Cady’s treachery, she responds by spreading around the contents of her Burn Book, quickly inciting a riot. To avoid suspicion, Regina inserts a fake libel of herself in the book in order to blame the only female students not mentioned in the book, The Plastics. Principal Ron Duvall (Tim Meadows) soon quells the riot, and ends up sending all the girls in the school to gather in the auditorium. Math teacher Ms. Sharon Norbury (Tina Fey), whom the Burn Book slandered as a drug dealer, makes the girls mentioned in the book fess up to the rumors and apologize to the other students and teachers. When Janis’s turn comes, she confesses her plan to destroy Regina with Cady’s help and openly mocks Regina with the support of the entire school. Pursued by an apologetic Cady, Regina storms out and gets hit by a school bus, breaking her spine.Without any friends, shunned by Aaron, and distrusted by everyone, Cady takes full blame for the Burn Book. Her guilt soon dissolves and she returns to her old personality. As part of her punishment for lying and failing Norbury’s class, she joins the Mathletes in their competition. There, while competing against an unattractive girl, Cady realizes that mocking the girl’s appearance would not stop the girl from beating her. She then realizes that the best thing to do is just solve the problem in front of you and ends up winning the competition after her opponent answers incorrectly. At the Spring Fling dance, Cady is elected Queen, but declares that all her classmates are wonderful in their own way, whereupon she breaks her plastic tiara and distributes the pieces. Cady makes amends with Janis and Damian, reconciles with Aaron, and reaches a truce with the Plastics, who then disband.
By the start of the new school year, the fate of the newly disbanded Plastics are shown. Regina joins the lacrosse team, Karen becomes the school weather reporter, while Gretchen joins and befriends the “Cool Asians.” Aaron graduates from high school and attends Northwestern University, Janis and Kevin Gnapoor begin dating, and Cady declares that she is now normal. Regina walks past Cady and smiles, showing that they are now kind to one another. As this happens, Damien points to Cady the new “Junior Plastics” walking by, and Cady imagines the Junior Plastics being hit by a bus.Mean Girls is often clever and hilarious, with several great one-liners and performances. The film seems tamed down a tad for the PG-13 rating, but it’s still sharp and effective more often than not.

CAST

Meaghan Martin (Awkward.)
Jennifer Stone (Deadtime Stories)
Claire Holt (The Originals)
Diego Boneta (Scream Queens)
Maiara Walsh (The Starving Games)
Nicole Gale Anderson (Beauty and The BEast)
Donn Lamkin (Just Cause)
Tim Meadows (Son of Zorn)
Linden Ashby (Mortal Kombat)
Colin Dennard (Lets Be Cops)
Bethany Anne Lind (Crackerjack)

Jo Mitchell is an 18-year-old high school senior. On her first day at North Shore High School, she encounters a clique called “The Plastics”, which is composed of the self-proclaimed leader, Mandi Weatherly; the ditzy girl with the raging libido, Chastity Meyer; and the hypochondriac Hope Plotkin. Jo also meets Abby Hanover, whom Mandi perceives to be a rival. Jo develops an attraction to Tyler Adams. Despite Jo’s attempts to avoid the Plastics, conflict develops between them and Abby.
Jo’s father is a mechanic who rebuilds engines for NASCAR. As a result, she becomes quite a good mechanic herself and ends up taking an advanced shop class at school, where she meets Tyler. Her principal means of transportation is a Vespa motor scooter. Jo’s dream is to attend Carnegie Mellon University, the alma mater of her late mother.When Jo meets Abby’s father, a successful infomercial entrepreneur, he offers to pay Jo’s college tuition in exchange for remaining good friends with Abby. Jo accepts, motivated by her desire to attend university. Jo, Tyler, and Abby become close friends. Jo also learns that Tyler is Mandi’s stepbrother. Mandi also escalates her war of pranks, including using artificial sweetener and coffee to ruin an engine Jo’s father is rebuilding.
Jo, Abby and another outcast girl, school newspaper reporter Quinn, start a new clique called the “Anti-Plastics”. They enact a series of pranks against Chastity and Hope. Jo runs against Mandi for Homecoming Court and their campaign threatens Tyler and Jo’s relationship. Jo tries to give back the money Sidney Hanover gave her for her friendship with Abby; Mandi overhears and uses this information against her. This leads to Tyler and Abby leaving her alone with the rest of her friends.

Mandi and her boyfriend Nick steal the homecoming court charity money. Mandi leaves an anonymous note saying the money is in Jo’s shed. The money is found in there. Thanks to an unwitting betrayal by Quinn, Jo is expelled but not before she finds Mandi and challenges her to a game of flag football. Mandi at first refuses until she realizes that she needs to win to remain popular so reluctantly agrees.

Tyler and the other Anti-Plastics try to help Jo and prove her innocence with the help of Elliott, a computer hacker. After beating the Plastics in a game of flag football, Mandi and Nick are arrested after images of them planting the money in Jo’s home are found by Elliott and texted to all of the cell phones in the audience. At the school’s Homecoming Dance, Abby and Elliott are elected as king and queen (thanks to Jo dropping out of the competition) and Jo and Tyler share a kiss.The film ends with Jo and Abby deciding to go to Carnegie Mellon University together, Tyler going to Penn State  and Quinn assuming the position she has long coveted, leader of the Plastics. Even though Mandi and Nick both got community service and were allowed to graduate (thanks in some part to their parents for donating a new library for the school), they lost their popularity for their actions. After seeking help for her raging libido problems, Chastity joins the Abstinence Club. Hope is working on overcoming her fear of germs.

This is clearly a very good attempt to make a sequel for Mean Girls. They had the right ingredients. Bunch of pretty girls, losers fighting back the status quo, a main character who starts from 0, goes to 10, loses everything to go way back to -10 and then goes back to… 9. Anyway, it’s not all that bad, but of course it fails to deliver compared to Tina Fey’s script for the original Mean Girls.