REVIEW: THE LIZZIE McGUIRE MOVIE

CAST
Hilary Duff (Agent Cody Banks)
Adam Lamberg (Radiant City)
Hallie Todd (Sabrina: The Teenage Witch)
Robert Carradine (Timecop 2)
Jake Thomas (A.I.)
Alex Borstein (Family Guy)
Jody Racicot (Flash Gordon 2007)
Ona Grauer (Izombie)
Aaron Douglas (Battlestar Galactica 2004)
Evangeline Lilly (Lost)
Peter Kelamis (Stargate Universe)
Haylie Duff (The Addams Family Reunion
Alex Borstein, Hilary Duff, and Adam Lamberg in The Lizzie McGuire Movie (2003)
The film begins as Lizzie McGuire (Hilary Duff) prepares for her junior-high graduation with her best friend, David “Gordo” Gordon (Adam Lamberg). During the ceremony, Lizzie trips onstage and accidentally brings the curtain down on her fellow graduates; this causes her to be teased by her ex-best friend, Kate Sanders (Ashlie Brillault), and her younger brother Matt (Jake Thomas). After graduation, Lizzie and her class embark on a trip to Rome chaperoned by their future high school principal, Angela Ungermeyer (Alex Borstein). To their dismay, Lizzie and Kate are assigned to the same hotel room.
Their class visits the Trevi Fountain, where Lizzie is approached by an Italian pop star named Paolo (Yani Gellman) who mistakes her for his singing partner, Isabella (also played by Duff). Paolo asks Lizzie to meet him at the fountain the next day, and she feigns illness to sneak away. He explains that he and Isabella are booked for the Italian Music Awards, but she left Italy after their breakup. Paolo tells Lizzie that Isabella lip syncs, and begs her to pose as Isabella for the concert. Although she reluctantly agrees, she begins to enjoy the life of an Italian pop star: designer clothes, dance rehearsals, and adoration from fans.
Lizzie continues to fake being ill to prepare for the concert, but Kate quickly figures out her secret. To Lizzie’s surprise, Kate agrees to help her and the two become friends again. Lizzie begins to fall in love with Paolo, to Gordo’s dismay. Ethan suspects Gordo is jealous of Paolo, though he insists otherwise. Meanwhile, Ms. Ungermeyer interrogates the students to learn who has been sneaking out. Gordo takes the blame, and is sent back home as punishment. Lizzie is shocked when Kate says that Gordo sacrificed himself to protect he.
Hilary Duff, Yani Gellman, and Brendan Kelly in The Lizzie McGuire Movie (2003)
At the airport Gordo meets Isabella, who has returned for the concert and is upset to hear that Lizzie is impersonating her. She and Gordo realize that Paolo is planning to cut Lizzie’s microphone at the concert, demonstrating to the crowd that Isabella is a fake. Paolo is planning on ruining Isabella’s career and embarrassing Lizzie again. Gordo and Isabella rush to the concert to stop him. Back home, Matt browses the Internet and finds Italian gossip sites with pictures of Lizzie as Isabella. When he tells his parents, the family flies to Rome. Ms. Ungermeyer realizes that Lizzie is missing again, and Ethan accidentally reveals that she is at the Italian Music Awards. The class rushes to the concert to find Lizzie; Gordo and Isabella find her backstage preparing for the show, and warn her about Paolo’s scheme. Lizzie refuses to believe them at first, but Isabella insists that Gordo can be trusted and Paolo is using her.
Hilary Duff and Yani Gellman in The Lizzie McGuire Movie (2003)
During the performance Isabella and Gordo expose Paolo by turning on his microphone, revealing his real voice. Embarrassed, Paolo runs off and is ambushed outside by paparazzi. His bodyguard, Sergei (Brendan Kelly), tells him it is time to face reality and quits. Sergei flirts with Ms. Ungermeyer, who has gotten the class and Lizzie’s family into the concert by beating up the bouncers. Isabella introduces Lizzie to the crowd, and has her sing “What Dreams Are Made Of”. As a singer, Lizzie gains a newfound confidence. Later, they celebrate at the hotel’s after party. Ms. Ungermeyer rescinds Gordo’s punishment, and Lizzie’s parents tell her she is grounded for the rest of the summer. Lizzie and Gordo sneak away from the party to go up to the roof. They promise to never let things change between them. The two kiss and rejoin the party.
This film is okay for kids who like Lizzy McGuire. I don’t think it will be watched over and over like some of our films, it is nice to see Evangeline Lilly before she did Lost.

 

 

REVIEW: KILLERS

CAST
Katherine Heigl (27 Dresses)
Ashton Kutcher (The Butterfly Effect)
Tom Selleck (Ted)
Catherine O’Hara (Beetlejuice)
Katherine Winnick (Hellraiser 8)
Kevin Sussman (Ugly Betty)
Martin Mull (Jingle All The Way)
Alex Borstein (Family Guy)
Usher Raymond (Texas Rangers)
Ariel Winter (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang)
Winston Story (Masked Rider)
Larry Joe Campbell (The Orville)
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After a break-up with a boyfriend, an overly cautious Jen (Katherine Heigl) travels to Nice, France with her parents (Tom Selleck and Catherine O’Hara). After getting into an elevator to go to her hotel room, she meets Spencer Aimes (Ashton Kutcher). Spencer asks her out for drinks and she accepts. The scene then changes to Spencer sneaking onto a boat, putting a remote controlled bomb on the bottom of a helicopter, then taking out a guard. He then swims back and goes on the date with Jen. After the helicopter takes off, Spencer triggers the bomb using his phone.
After a night of drinking, Jen reveals that she’s not the spontaneous person she’s been pretending to be and in return Spencer bluntly tells her that he’s an assassin, albeit unhappy about being one. Unfortunately she’s already passed out and hasn’t heard. In spite of this, Spencer decides that Jen’s the woman he’s been looking for and decides to marry her. When Spencer tells his boss, Holbrook (Martin Mull), his plan, the response is that quitting is not an option. Spencer is defiant and goes ahead with his plan.Three years later, they are settled into their new normal life. After Spencer surprises Jen with a remodeled office, she gives him a birthday surprise: tickets to Nice to celebrate his birthday and their three years. Because of his dubious connections to Nice, Spencer is less than enthusiastic. When Jen’s friends ask about his reaction, they take it as a sign that he might be getting bored and fill her head with doubts. 
Meanwhile, Spencer gets a postcard from his old boss and the ultimatum to take another assignment. While trying to refuse him long distance, Jen’s father shows up to take Spencer to dinner, so Spencer hangs up the phone, prompting suspicion in Mr. Kornfeldt. This is fueled further when Jen’s dad sees the postcard and quizzes him about the XOXX (hugs and kisses), being odd coming from a former boss. Stopping home to change, Spencer finds that the dinner invitation is just a detour to bring him to a surprise party. While Spencer navigates drunken friends, Jen’s friends continue to fill her head with doubts over Spencer’s lack of enthusiasm for the Nice trip. This is further irritated, when the following morning, despite her attempts to be physical with him, Spencer rushes Jen off on her business trip.
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A little while later, Jen comes back (without having gone on her trip) to find Spencer being tossed around their house by Henry (Rob Riggle), Spencer’s best friend and co-worker. Spencer screams for her to get his gun (of which she was unaware) and she shoots Henry in the arm. While interrogating him, Henry reveals that there is a $20 million bounty on Spencer’s head. An unidentified sniper takes shots at them, and Spencer and Jen flee. Henry goes after them, and after a car chase through the neighborhood, they end up in a construction zone, where Henry crashes his car. Spencer rams him into a trench, impaling his car on rebar and killing him. They then go to the hotel room where Spencer’s old boss is staying, but find that someone has already killed him. Jen demands that they go to her dad for help, but Spencer disagrees. In the middle of their argument Jen vomits, and declares that she might be pregnant.
Heading back to his office for Jen to take a pregnancy test, Spencer is attacked by his secretary (Katheryn Winnick) and realizes that there are others who know about the contract. Jen then reveals that she is pregnant and is leaving Spencer. Left alone, Spencer is attacked by a delivery driver, who is then run over and killed by Olivia (Lisa Ann Walter), Henry’s wife, another killer vying for the contract. She then tries to run over Spencer, but Jen returns and smashes Olivia’s car into a fuel tank, which Spencer then shoots at and explodes, killing Olivia. The two discuss their possible future and return to their neighborhood, which is holding its annual block party. When they first arrive, they are attacked by two more assailants who, in a chase through backyards, crash their car, giving Jen and Spencer a chance to flee into the block party. As they walk through it, they receive many suspicious looks from neighbors. They enter their house to retrieve guns and their passports. Spencer is grabbing the guns when he is attacked by the two assailants again, whom he eventually kills.
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Meanwhile, one assassin, Kristen (Casey Wilson), one of Jen’s best friends, holds Jen’s mother as a hostage in a Mexican standoff with Jen. Jen’s father arrives and kills Kristen. He then explains that he was the one who put out the bounty on Spencer. He knew of Spencer’s previous work all along, and hired the neighbors and co-workers three years before, in case Spencer started working for his old boss again, who Jen’s father says had “gone dirty.” After seeing the postcard from Holbrook in Spencer’s office, he came to the conclusion that Spencer had re-accepted his old job and activated the assassins. He reveals that he had been an operative as well, and that he was actually the target Spencer was supposed to kill in Nice three years earlier.
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In a standoff between Spencer and Jen’s father, he does not trust that Spencer is really out of the game. Wanting to prove that he really did get out, Spencer drops his gun, and tells Jen’s father he has no intention of killing him. Jen, now convinced, reveals her pregnancy to her parents. Jen’s father, after killing one last wounded assassin, drops his gun as well. The family makes peace by building a trust circle, in which Spencer reveals that English is not his first language, and that he wanted to be the first one to say “I love you” to Jen. The movie ends showing Spencer and Jen’s father working on some wires near Spencer and Jen’s baby’s crib. Spencer has grown a moustache just like Jen’s father. Spencer and Jen then leave to let Jen’s mom and dad babysit. They all leave the room, but Spencer comes back in to activate the lasers protecting the baby.
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Killers is definitely not the best movie and won’t win awards. But it’s a fun movie. The story is fairly predictable, but it has some good action and is generally pretty entertaining

REVIEW: COYOTE UGLY

CAST

Piper Perabo (Slap Her Shes French)
Adam Garcia (The Code)
John Goodman (Argo)
Maria Bello (Secret Window)
Izabella Miko (The Cape)
Tyra Banks (Tropic Thunder)
Bridget Moynahan (I, Robot)
Melanie Lynskey (Two and a Half Men)
LeAnn Rimes (Anger Management
Kaitlin Olson (The Heat)
Jack McGee (The Fighter)
Johnny Knoxville (The Last Stand)
Alex Borstein (Family Guy)
Melody Perkins (Power Rangers In Space)

Violet Sanford (Piper Perabo) leaves her hometown of South Amboy, New Jersey, her father Bill (John Goodman), and best friend Gloria (Melanie Lynskey) to pursue her dreams of becoming a songwriter in nearby New York City. The pizza shop where she works has a wall covered with the autographs of employees that left, hoping to make it big, and Violet adds hers to the wall.
Violet tries unsuccessfully, a lot of times, to get her demo tape noticed by the recording studios. One night, she tries to get herself noticed by a music industry scout. The bartender jokingly points out Kevin O’Donnell (Adam Garcia), making her believe that he is the bar owner. When the joke is discovered, Violet feels that Kevin was making a fool out of her. With only a few dollars left in her pocket after her apartment is robbed, she goes to an all-night diner and notices three girls, Cammie (Izabella Miko), Rachel (Bridget Moynahan), and Zoe (Tyra Banks), flaunting the hundreds of dollars in tips they earned. After inquiring, she finds out that they work at a trendy bar named Coyote Ugly.
She finds her way to the bar and convinces the bar owner Lil (Maria Bello) to give her an audition. Violet’s first audition does not go well; but after breaking up a fight between two customers, Lil agrees to give her a second audition. At her second audition, Violet douses the fire warden in water costing Lil $250. In order to keep her job, she has to make up $250 in one night. Kevin turns up at the bar, but ends up being auctioned off to one of the women in the bar. In order to pay off her debt to Kevin, Violet agrees to go on four dates with him. The two begin a relationship.
Kevin commits himself to helping Violet overcome her stage fright so that she can sell her music. Violet’s stage fright was shown to be inherited from her mother who also came to New York to be a singer. Also shown is Violet’s ability to sing to songs that she did not write. We learn this when she sings on the bar in the bar in order to save the necks of Cammie and Rachel who were trying to break up a fight between the customers.
One night a patron takes a picture of Violet in the middle of a raunchy move and with water pouring on her. When the picture appears in the paper, Violet’s father happens to see it and gets angry at her. She continues to pursue her dream, though, despite being sidetracked with work at the bar. She gets fired when Kevin gets into a fight at the bar. She returns to New Jersey for her best friend’s wedding and makes her way back to New York when her dad was in a car accident. Later she performs at an open mic night at the Bowery Ballroom with the Coyotes from the Coyote Ugly saloon, her father, her best friend, and Kevin all there for moral support. The performance goes over very well and she finally lands a deal with a record label. The film concludes back at Coyote Ugly with LeAnn Rimes, having recorded Violet’s song, singing on the bar as Violet joins in.
This film is absolutely brilliant.  It is definitely a must see film.

 

REVIEW: DAWG (AKA Bad Boy)

CAST

Denis Leary (The Amazing Spider-Man)
Elizabeth Hurley (Austin Powers)
Nicole Robinson (Dragon Wars)
Mia Cottet (The Tuxedo)
Vanessa Bell Calloway (Daylight)
Elaine Hendrix (Two and a Half Men)
Alex Borstein (Family Guy)
Maria Canals-Barrera (Justice League)
Will Sasso (Movie 43)
Brigitta Dau (Retro Puppet Master)

In order to get a sizable inheritance, Denis Leary is understated but hilarious as Doug, who must suffer the indignities associated with apologizing all of the women he has betrayed. Elizabeth Hurley, with her impeccably straight laced English accent is perfect as Anna, a rigid, nearly always thoroughly offended lawyer charged with chaperoning him on this perilous journey in what is sure to be the road trip from hell.Bad_Boy-Dirty_Liar-Dawg-2002-003031The first woman is a crazy cat lady – a wise choice to try to justify why he left her. Never mind that she may have become that way because he dumped her. The next woman is a sex maniac, so one wonders why he would dump that kind of chic. It would have made more sense to keep this one around kicks. Who knows, maybe she was too much for the old boy.  Christine is a militant African American mayor who publicly flogs Doug while he stands in her campaign headquarters. While she clearly used him as an experiment designed to see what would happen if she dated a white man, she is clearly still bitter about the situation. With good measure, she refuses to accept his apology. Anna insists he go back to renegotiate by admitting to disgusting things about himself as she feeds him the words to grovel for forgiveness. She relents. On to his next victim. Angel is a model who embarrasses him because she doesn’t remember their rendezvous. Then she drags him off to a private room while the director says tells the crew to take 5. Only Doug is unable to perform, despite trying to fake it. Again, Anna must listen to them trying to have sex as she waits by the car, but doesn’t laugh enough to make the scene funnier. Instead, she modestly cups her hand over her face as if she is discovering something she shouldn’t know about.

Emma’s picture looks decidedly normal and sweet. She has a daughter and you can pretty well guess what this means. The girl says her mother died and that she does not have a dad. He could be her father, but the kid’s granny sends him away. Anna shows some compassion and says she won’t count that one. He finds Erica at a strip joint but she is now a transsexual living as Eric. Then she busts a move using all her stripper guile. She became a man because she was sick of being a doormat. Then she whips out her junk. She says he was the first person she had oral sex with and that he’d told her not to worry that she would get the hang of it. When she finds out he stands to get an inheritance she demands that he perform oral sex on her new manhood. Anna comes to the rescue, just as Eric is beating the crap out of him. So this is the second time that she shows him compassion. We are well on our way to their mating ritual.

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Will Sasso is hilarious as white trash trailer park Willy, the sister of the equally hilarious Alex Borstein (both Mad TV alum) who plays Doris. Of course, at least one of the babes he boned must have gotten fat — so she has blown up like a puffer fish on steroids. Doris relates her tale of woe, telling him how he’d promised to marry her. He admits to being a cad during their high school years. No doubt, he probably deflowered her, too. Maybe there was a reference I missed. She asks for a kiss and then promptly jumps him in anger. I was expecting her to try to put the moves on him, because hot guys always seem to think that all fat chicks want them, despite what a douche they may be. So I was glad to see that instead, she throws him out and refuses to forgive him.  He can’t get the little girl he thinks he fathered out of his head and returns to talk to granny. He finds out Emma fell for him, but when she realized she was pregnant, she knew Doug was an ass and didn’t want him raising her kid.Anna finds him weeping in his hotel room, consoles him and says he’ll get his million dollars. She says she is not actually married. You know the rest. Then POW! Anna is actually one of his victims! So she concocted the whole scheme up … there is no inheritance! She’s getting revenge for how he treated her when she was a mousy, bespectacled college student. course, he reunites with the daughter he never had. They run into each other and it is revealed that Anna perhaps regrets what he did to Doug to pay him back for breaking her heart. He turns to glance at her and we are supposed to know that eventually, they get together..v1.bjs0MTc5OTQ7ajsxNzMyOTsxMjAwOzE1MTY7MTEzNwStay for the out takes. They are worth it! All in all a funny film.

REVIEW: FAMILY GUY: LIVE IN VEGAS

CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Jason Alexander (Shallow Hal)

Seth MacFarlane described the album as, “a blend of the rich, lush arrangements of the classic era of Rat Pack Vegas shows combined with the fart jokes of today”. MacFarlane co-produced the album and co-wrote several tracks. It features guest stars Jason Alexander, Patti LuPone and Haylie Duff. The album includes a cover of “The Last Time I Saw Paris” by Jerome Kern as well as a medley of theme songs from 1980s shows such as Diff’rent Strokes, Who’s the Boss, Growing Pains and Charles in Charge. The album is arranged and orchestrated by Walter Murphy and all songs are produced by MacFarlane and Murphy.
All the voice actors from the show appear on the album voicing their characters. The album includes a DVD with the music video of Stewie’s “Sexy Party” and behind the scenes of making the album and the video. The DVD also includes a trailer for American Dad! and the fourth season of Family Guy. Another great Family Guy release both soundtrack and DVD will have all fans in stitches.

REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – PARTIAL TERMS OF ENDEARMENT

CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Mike Henry (Ted)
Patrick Warburton (Scream 3)
Alexandra Breckenridge (The Walking Dead)
Phil LaMarr (Free Enterprise)
Will Sasso (Anger Management)
Wil Wheaton (Star Trek: TNG)
Michael York (Logans Run)

While attending her college reunion at Salve Regina University with Peter, Lois spots her old roommate, Naomi Robinson, with whom she had a brief lesbian relationship in college. Peter is shocked but excited to discover that Lois was bisexual in college. Naomi indicates that she would like to discuss a proposal of some importance with them at their home. Assuming that he will participate in a threesome with Lois and Naomi, Peter sends Chris, Meg, Stewie and Brian out of the house. After Naomi arrives, she introduces her husband, Dale. Peter still expects that they will now be participating in an orgy, and tries to seduce the three of them while dressed in various costumes. When they clear the air to a dismayed Peter that they’re not there for sex, Naomi and Dale tell Lois and Peter they’ve had trouble conceiving and ask Lois to be a surrogate mother for them, leading Lois to think the matter over.
The next morning, as the family is eating breakfast, Lois reveals her intention to become a surrogate mother for Naomi and Dale, causing Peter to become upset at the thought of her being pregnant for nine months. Despite this, Lois decides to go to Dr. Hartman to have the in vitro fertilization performed, enduring more of Dr. Hartman’s shtick involving celebrity crossbreeds and having a tribe of bush men implant the egg with blowguns. A pregnancy test comes back positive the next day, and a furious Peter attempts to cause Lois to have a miscarriage before ultimately confronting her about the pregnancy. While she continues asserting her intention to provide a child to Naomi and Dale, Quahog 5 News suddenly reveals that Naomi and Dale died in a car crash. Devastated by the announcement, Lois questions whether she should have an abortion or continue with the pregnancy and put the baby up for adoption.
In an attempt to come to a decision, Lois and Peter decide to visit the local family-planning center, and ultimately decide to abort the embryo. However, as Peter exits the center he encounters an anti-abortion rally, where he is shown an anti-abortion video by one of the protesters. The video causes him to reconsider about aborting the unborn baby. Returning home, Lois continues to advocate her right to choose, while Peter now attempts to argue the unborn child’s right to life and whether Lois has the responsibility of carrying it to term. At their wits’ end, the two decide to discuss the matter, once and for all. The next day, Lois talks with the family about “the wonderful new member of the Griffin family”, but then, after a few seconds of silence, Peter turns to the camera and says to the audience “We had the abortion”, promptly ending the episode
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I think the censors were a bit heavy-handed to ban this episode from TV, I’ve seen more risque things said on The View! Having said that, the episode is very funny with Seth MacFarlane at his satirical and uninhibited best!! The extras are also worth watching – in particular, the Seth and Alex (almost live) Comedy Show, which had me in stitches!

REVIEW: FAMILY GUY – IT’S A TRAP

CAST (VOICES)

Seth MacFarlane (Flashforward)
Alex Borstein (Power Rangers Zeo)
Seth Green (IT)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Mike Henry (Ted)
Jennifer Tilly (Curse of Chucky)
Patrick Warburton (Scream 3)
Dee Bradley Baker (American Dad)
Michael Dorn (Star Trek: TNG)
Carrie Fisher (Star Wars)
Anne Hathaway (The Dark Knight Rises)
Marty Hart (Love Affair)
Patrick Stewart (American Dad)
Adam West (60s Batman)

 The Griffin family experience another power outage, forcing them to reluctantly go through Return of the Jedi.Rather than setting up the plot, the opening crawl states that Fox insisted Seth MacFarlane complete the trilogy. It makes reference to his then-upcoming film Ted in the sentence, “But Fox suddenly had dollar signs in their eyes, and they said, ‘Seth, if you don’t do Jedi, we’re not gonna let you leave to go direct your movie.”Darth Vader (Stewie) arrives on the new, partially constructed Death Star, where Imperial Moff Jerjerrod (Roger from American Dad!) informs him that the new battle station no longer has the design flaws of its predecessor, except for a hole that could destroy the station if fired upon. Vader warns Moff Jerjerrod that they should fix that problem before the Emperor (Carter) arrives.On Tatooine, R2-D2 (Cleveland) and C-3PO (Quagmire) find Jabba the Hutt (Joe)’s palace in order to initiate a plan to save Han Solo (Peter), still frozen in carbonite for posterity. Leia (Lois) unfreezes Han, who releases a long fart. Their reunion is cut short when Jabba captures her and she is outfitted provocatively, and shackled by Jabba’s side. Han, meanwhile, is thrown into a prison cell with Chewbacca (Brian), who got caught eating out of Jabba’s garbage.Luke (Chris) arrives at the palace and attempts to bargain for the release of his friends. Jabba opens a trap door and Luke falls into a pit where he battles and kills the Rancor (Rush Limbaugh). Afterwards, Jabba orders Luke and his friends to be eaten by the Sarlaac (Meg). During the execution ceremony, Luke gives Jabba one last chance to release him and his friends. When Jabba refuses, Luke initiates an assault on Jabba’s crew with the help of Lando Calrissian (Mort), disguised as one of Jabba’s henchmen. Many of Jabba’s men are knocked into the Sarlaac including Boba Fett (Ernie the Giant Chicken) (according to a dying guard, Boba just fell off). Distracted by the carnage, Leia chokes Jabba using her slave chains while her fellow rebels commandeer a transport ship. Luke, Leia, Han, Chewie, Lando, R2-D2, and C-3PO all fly to safety.Luke and R2-D2 fly to Dagobah so Luke can finish his training with Yoda (Carl) while the others rejoin the rebel fleet. On Dagobah, Yoda explains the final part of training is to face Vader. In his dying words, Yoda reveals that Luke has a sibling. The spirit of Obi-Wan Kenobi (Herbert) appears to Luke and further explains that his sibling is Princess Leia, “the only damn woman in the galaxy.” The rebels begin planning an assault on the new Death Star. Admiral Ackbar (Klaus from American Dad!) explains that the plan will be the same as the last time they destroyed the Death Star, except now they must first destroy a shield generator located on the forest moon of Endor.In order to land on the forest moon of Endor, Han uses a stolen Imperial ship and old access code to sneak past the Empire’s blockade. Vader allows them passage on to the moon, knowing Luke is aboard the ship. When they reach the moon’s surface, the rebels are spotted by Imperial soldiers. The soldiers attempt to retreat to warn others of the rebel attack, but Luke and Leia stop them in an elaborate bicycle chase sequence. Separated from the others, Leia is befriended by Wicket the Ewok (Tim from The Cleveland Show). Luke, Han, Chewie and the droids fall into an Ewok trap while searching for Leia. They are captured and brought to the village where Leia is being housed. The Ewoks believe C-3PO is a god and begin to worship him. Luke tells Princess Leia they are siblings, but Leia claims to have already known that. She then introduces a Conway Twitty cutaway.Following Yoda’s advice, Luke surrenders to Vader in order to confront him. Vader tries to convince Luke to turn to the dark side. Luke refuses, but is delighted to find out that it is taco night. The two meet with the Emperor, who reveals that Luke’s friends are walking into a trap on the forest moon. When this revelation fails to anger Luke, the Emperor begins to mock actor Seth Green (who voices Chris). Luke defends Green saying that he’s been in successful projects, only to have The Emperor saying the negative side of Green’s roles. Luke becomes enraged and begins dueling with Vader. Back on the forest moon, Han leads the rebels to the shield generator. Complaining about a lack of dark plot content, he forces the three technicians inside to dig their own graves with their helmets, then ordering one of them to stab his companion to death and wear his face. Before they can carry out Han’s disturbing orders, however, the company is ambushed. The Ewoks help the rebels escape from the Imperial troops and destroy the shield generator, while Lando and Nien Nunb (Rallo from The Cleveland Show) lead the attack on the Death Star.Luke finally subdues Vader after Seth Green is further mocked, but he refuses to execute him and join the dark side at the Emperor’s request. The Emperor then incapacitates Luke with his powerful Force lightning. Because Luke asks Vader politely for help, Vader gathers his remaining strength and kills the distracted Emperor by throwing him into the reactor core. Vader and Luke manage to flee the Death Star before Lando and his crew blow it up. Unfortunately, when Vader asks Luke to help him remove his mask (to “look on you with my own eyes”), Luke accidentally twists and breaks Vader’s neck. Everyone rendezvous back at the Ewok village to celebrate the rebels victory over the Empire. While the Ewoks kill the wounded Imperials, the spirits of Obi-Wan and Yoda appear to Luke, alongside the spirit of the redeemed Anakin Skywalker (Stewie), who angrily accuses Luke of murdering him and starts swearing at him.The Griffins’ power returns just as Peter concludes the story, Meg then asks Peter “What about the prequel trilogy?” with Peter suggesting that The Cleveland Show might do the prequels (though that show’s subsequent cancellation has made such parodies impossible). After that, Chris asks Peter another question about how come he says in the story that Seth Green is a douche. Peter answers saying that in his opinion that Green has done a lot of unsuccessful projects and that Green sucks. Chris retaliates with saying that he thinks Seth MacFarlane is a douche. Peter, Stewie and Brian (all voiced by MacFarlane) defend MacFarlane as a talented young man with fresh ideas and good humor. Chris tells the three in anger that he got the whole idea of Family Guy off The Simpsons, with Meg and Lois supporting Chris that MacFarlane “only brings ten new episodes of the show a year” and “we get it, he watched a lot of television in the ’80s” (a reference to the show’s many cutaway gags referencing 1980s television). The argument ends with Peter claiming that people will just remember the laughter, before the family looks awkwardly at each other.

Anyone who has enjoyed the previous chapters of this separate feature series will find more of the same here, and if you’re like me, you will only find that a good thing. Although I must say, it also helps to refresh your memory by watching the original Star Wars film before trying this to pick up the more subtle references!!